by Nikki Ashton
As for Sam and me, well since the one kiss when I’d been packing Josh’s things, there’d been no real contact, not like that anyway. I had noticed how he always brushed my hair from my eyes when we were talking, squeezed my waist when he moved past me in the kitchen, or put toothpaste on my toothbrush if I was going into the bathroom after him. God, everything about Samuel Cooper made my legs feel like jelly and my heart full of love. I had admitted that one to myself a couple of nights before when lying in bed I found myself getting excited about seeing him again in the morning. Of course I’d have preferred to see him next to me in bed, naked, but spending my days with him would have to suffice for the time being until…I had no idea until what because I was being stupid and needed a good slap. He obviously cared about me and loved Frankie, so what the hell was I waiting for.
As I considered it again, for the billionth time that week, I decided when he woke up I was going to talk to him. I was going to tell him we should tell Frankie and start being a real couple, starting with him taking me to bed and fucking me senseless.
Feeling determined, I left the kitchen and the boiled kettle and went to the lounge, deciding I’d relax with a book for a while, in readiness for my conversation with Sam. When I opened the door, I was shocked to see him lying on the sofa. He was perfectly still and had one arm hanging down, his fingers touching the floor. In fact, he looked too still and my heart stopped for a couple of beats as I watched him, convinced I couldn’t see him breathing.
“Sam,” I hissed as I rushed over to him. “Sam are you okay?”
I put my hands on his shoulders and shook him, calling his name and almost screamed when he opened his eyes and gave me a huge smile.
“Hey,” he said.
“Oh my god, I nearly shit myself,” I gasped. “I thought you were dead.”
“Nope and I’ll prove it to you.”
In a flash he had my back to the sofa and him on top of me, holding my hands above my head as he looked down at me with lust in his eyes.
“What are you doing?” I giggled. “You’re supposed to be ill.”
“Not any longer I’m not, so it’s about time I told you what’s what.”
“What do you mean?” My chest heaved as my body recognised his, causing my blood to heat up.
“I’m sick of waiting when we both know what we have.”
My mouth parted and Sam’s tongue darted out to lick his lips. He looked as though he might devour me, but then he shook his head and grinned instead.
“I want you more than I’ve ever wanted anyone,” he whispered against my ear. “Not just because you’re the mother of my son, but because of who you are and how you make me feel. You’re beautiful and sexy, you’re kind and strong, things that I’ve told you before, but every single word is true.”
“Sam-.”
“Nope,” he said, interrupting me with a deep, sexy growl. “I’m talking and unless you want me to slap that fucking amazing arse of yours, you’ll listen to what I’ve got to say.”
Shit, I was done over thinking things, I was going to listen and agree to anything that he said, because if the erection pushing against my stomach was anything to go by, he was going to suggest plenty of things that I’d be totally on board with.
“We are doing this,” he continued. “We are being a couple and we are telling our son today when he gets home. It’s too soon for me to move in here permanently, but when we get to that point, which we will, I’ll sell my apartment and we’ll buy somewhere for us as a family, not somewhere that you lived with that fucking prick.”
He paused long enough for me to nod my head. He then kissed the end of my nose before continuing.
“I know what I did to you was fucking hideous and hurtful and I will never, ever forget that or forgive myself but I will always, and I mean always, fucking love you with all my heart. You and Frankie are such a great gift, Maisie, and I am so damn grateful for you both that I will not fuck this up. I know you think if I have to try then it’s not working, but I will never stop trying to be better for you than I was the day before because you, my beautiful girl, deserve the fucking world.”
I was speechless and breathless as I tried to take in Sam’s words and all my head kept coming back to was that he’d said he loved me with all his heart.
“You love me?” I whispered, almost choking on the emotion that one four lettered word could evoke. “You said you loved me with all your heart.”
Sam nodded and rested his forehead against mine. “I do,” he whispered. “I’m so fucking in love with you my chest aches when I get into that bed and know I’m not going to see you for six or seven hours. Everything about you makes me crave you, Maisie. I need you to be mine. I want you to be mine. I want us, I want our family.”
The euphoria I felt was so intense I felt my whole body shaking and entwined my fingers with Sam’s that were still holding my hands above my head.
“I get it if you don’t feel the same,” he continued. “But just give us a chance, please.”
I was bowled over by the way the confident, cocky man on top of me had laid himself bare. He had given me everything that was in his head and in his heart, having no clue whether I felt the same way. He’d given me his vulnerability and trusted me with it, so how the hell could I not love him back.
“I love you too,” I replied, ending the sentence with a soft kiss to his cheek.
His eyes stared down at me questioningly as his fingers tightened around mine.
“You do?”
I nodded. “I trust you with my heart, Sam, mine and Frankie’s, so yes, of course I love you. I’m so in love with you it makes my chest ache too and I get excited when I know I’m going to see you in a few hours.”
He chuckled and dropped a kiss to my neck, stirring other more primitive emotions in me.
“I was scared when you got hurt.” I exhaled, as I recalled Amy’s phone call and the long night of worry. “I hated to think you might be taken away from us before we’d even got started, and that wasn’t just for Frankie, it was for me too. I want everything that you want and I need everything that you need and it has to be with you, because without you it would be meaningless.”
Sam’s lips met mine in the softest of kisses, but the way his body hardened against me and his grip on my hands tightened, I knew it wouldn’t stay like that for long and soon our clothes were quickly discarded. Foreplay was hot, fast and heady – hungry kisses, grabbing hands, and bites of passion until finally Sam sank himself inside of me, filling me. With each thrust came a declaration of love and I knew we were going to fine, we were going to be the love story we should have been all along.
Sam
8 months later
“You sure I can’t persuade you?” I asked Maisie as we walked along hand in hand.
“No way,” she said with a shudder.
I bent to kiss her and earned a groan from my son who was holding her other hand. Maisie giggled and batted me away, probably because she knew if I brought my best moves out she’d agree to anything, even the tattoo I’d been teasing her about.
“Can I have one, Dad?” Frankie asked.
“A tattoo? No way, not until you’re eighteen at least.”
I didn’t look to guidance from Maisie when answering him, I hadn’t for a while, not since we’d all moved in together five months earlier. Maisie was worried it was all a little quick, but I’d been pissed I’d had to wait three months to get us all under one roof. Even when I was telling her on her sofa that day that it was too soon I was fucking ready then, but I knew she wasn’t, so I bided my time and wore her down with my best moves until she was practically begging for me to find us a house.
There’d been a few teething problems, mainly me trying too hard with Frankie, but I was getting there with Maisie’s help. The main thing was we had a house fucking chock full of damn love and there wasn’t a day that went by that I didn’t show or tell them both. Elijah had even asked me if I’d become part of the unsullied, wh
atever the fuck that meant. Needless to say, I flipped him off and then told my girlfriend I fucking loved her – okay we were all drunk at the time, but the sentiment was there. The point was, no one was as surprised as I was at how I’d changed from a workaholic, selfish prick who had no desire to be a father, to a home loving, family man who adored his kid, couldn’t wait to have another and was desperate to make his girlfriend his wife – a proposal being something that I was in the process of planning. It involved me and Frankie, a big fuck off diamond and a picnic at our lake, oh and Maisie of course, seeing as it’d be pretty pointless without her. Before that though I had an appointment with Isaac Grainger and his tattoo gun.
When I pushed open the studio door, we were immediately greeted with a crying toddler and a slightly frazzled looking Scarlett.
“Sorry, Sam,” she said as we walked to the desk. “She’s ready for her afternoon nap, but won’t go until she’s seen her daddy and he’s running over on his last appointment.”
She cradled the pale blonde head against her chest and gently rocked her up and down.
“She’s not normally this bad,” Scarlett said apologetically to Maisie. “Sam will tell you, she’s normally laughing.”
“Aww it’s fine,” Maisie cooed rubbing a hand down little Ava’s back. “Frankie was just the same when he was tired.”
“I was not,” Frankie objected.
Maisie raised her eyebrows at him. “Yes well I beg to differ.”
For a second my chest hurt as I realised I couldn’t confirm or deny the memory, but it soon soothed when Frankie started chattering to Scarlett, not caring about the noise coming from Ava.
“My dad is having a surprise tattoo today,” he said proudly.
“I know, Ava’s daddy Isaac is doing it.”
“Is Isaac your boyfriend or your husband?”
Scarlett looked a little perplexed but answered anyway. “My husband, although only for a couple of months, why?”
She looked at Maisie who shrugged. I grinned knowing exactly what my little horror was up to. He was priming his mum for the big proposal, although I was hoping she didn’t say yes purely because of our son’s emotional blackmail.
“I was just wondering if you all had the same name, that’s all.” Frankie grinned at me and then ran off to look at some of the art on the walls.
“Do you think he’s worried that he doesn’t have your surname?” Maisie hissed, worry etched on her face.
I feigned confusion and shrugged. We’d talked about changing his name, now that I was on his birth certificate, but talking was all we’d done. I was just glad that I was now ‘legally’ his dad, although I only had myself to blame for that one, not being there when his birth was registered. Plus, changing Frankie’s name was all part of the proposal plans.
Before Maisie could talk about it anymore, the door to the studios swung open and in sauntered Isaac, looking every inch the cool, handsome tattooist that the women seemed to love.
He looked over and smiled, offering me a wave as he said something to the client he was showing out. As the guy approached the desk, Maisie and I fell back a couple of steps as we watched Scarlett hand Ava over to Isaac while the guy paid her. As soon as she landed in Isaac’s arms, Ava’s crying stopped.
“Hey Sam, how are you doing?” Isaac asked, coming toward us and wiping at Ava’s face. “It’s been a while and no Elijah today.”
I grinned because Elijah and I had always made a pact to get inked together, apart from one time and now it was my turn to do the same.
“Nope, not today. So, she’s grown.” I ran a hand over Ava’s head that now lolled against her daddy’s shoulder.
“Yeah, she’ll be three soon. In fact, we have another one on the way.” He beamed over at Scarlett who rolled her eyes but then gave us a mile-wide smile.
“Oh wow, congratulations.”
“Yes, congratulations,” Maisie added. “When’s it due?”
There was a glint of something in her eye and I felt a little thrill thinking that maybe my desire for another kid wouldn’t be too difficult to make happen.
“Scar’s only just thirteen weeks, so a way to go yet. My mum is more excited than we are, I think.”
“How are your mum and Dex?”
Dex was Isaac’s step-dad and owned the studio and was one of the most sought after tattoo artists around, although Isaac seemed to be catching him up.
“They’re great. My little brother and sisters keep them occupied, although Annie is still living in London after she finished Uni, she’s working for some huge software company as a trainee development manager or something.” He shook his head. “I have no idea what the high flying circles are that she mixes in. As for Charlie well he’s got girls galore turning up on the doorstep and Savannah is getting bossier the older she gets, but it’s all good. They’re all happy as Larry, whoever the hell Larry is.”
“I think she’s asleep,” Maisie said, nodding at Ava.
Isaac kissed the top of her head and sighed. “Okay, let me put her down in the back and then we’ll get started.”
“What exactly are you having done?” Maisie asked, dropping a kiss to my bicep.
“I’ve told you, you’ll have to wait and see.” I passed her my credit card. “Now go and spend some money because I’ll be a couple of hours.”
I winked, gave her a kiss and then followed Isaac to the studio.
“Oh my god, Sam,” Maisie gasped as her finger tips gently touched underneath the tattoo that Isaac had done.
He hadn’t wrapped it yet, so that Maisie and Frankie could see and although it was still a little raw and tender, there was no denying he’d done another amazing job, particularly as he’d done it free hand.
On my left ab was a man carrying a boy and above it in script were the words
“I am hers, she is mine and he is who we created”
Below the man and boy it said;
“Frankie, my son, my life”
“Is that for me, Dad?” Frankie asked, his face full of awe.
I nodded. “You and your mum.”
“Because she’s yours and you’re hers?”
“Yep, exactly that.”
I swallowed the thick lump in my throat and pulled Frankie to my side, watching Maisie carefully as she continued to study the tattoo.
“Do you like it?” I asked tentatively. “The tattoo and the sentiment behind it.”
She looked up at me with tears in her eyes and nodded. “I love it and I love you.” Reaching up onto her tiptoes she kissed me, taking care not to rub against me.
When she took a step back I watched her beautiful brown eyes fall onto my chest again, I knew the time was right. Fuck it and fuck any plans of a romantic picnic.
I reached into my jeans pocket and pulled out the small, velvet box and with an arm still around Frankie I cleared my throat. Maisie looked up at me and then noticed the box in the flat of my shaking palm that I was holding out to her.
“Sam,” she gasped.
“Dad, now?”
When I nodded, Frankie pulled away from me and began to jump up and down on the spot, clapping his hands with excitement.
“Maisie West, you know how much I love you and I was going to do this all romantic at the lake with lanterns and wine and maybe some flower petals thrown in, which we can still do if you want to, but something like this shouldn’t need to be planned. Something like this should be done when it feels right and it feels right at this exact moment, so will you marry me? Will you allow me to make us all Coopers?”
My heart pumped wildly as I opened the box to reveal a square cut diamond on a white gold band. Staring down at it, Maisie slapped a hand against her mouth.
“It’s beautiful,” she whispered and looked back up at me. “Seriously?”
I nodded. “Yep, and the name thing.” I looked down at Frankie who was gazing at his mum. “I’ve looked into it and we can get Frankie’s name changed easily, seeing as I’m now on his birth certifi
cate.”
“Tell us Mum,” Frankie cried. “Will you marry Dad?”
Maisie grinned and nodded. “Of course I will.”
As I slipped the ring onto her finger, Frankie flung his arms around us and started to jump up and down again.
“I love you so fucking much,” I whispered against Maisie’s mouth as euphoria I’d never felt before washed through me.
“Good,” she sighed. “Because I’m never letting you go.”
“I’d never want to, you’re stuck with me forever.”
As we kissed, hugged, and celebrated as a family, I knew I was where I was always meant to be. It had taken me a while to get my head out my arse and realise it, but there was no denying Maisie and Frankie had always been my destiny.
Sam
Two years later
As I watched Frankie struggle with his homework, I had to feel for him. I hadn’t been the brightest kid at school and Frankie appeared to be following in my footsteps. Not that I cared too much, he’d work for me, if he wanted to, or he could sweep the streets – whatever made my boy happy.
“You okay there buddy?” I asked, running a hand over the top of his scruffy hair. “And have you actually brushed your hair today?”
Frankie looked up at me and grinned. His babyish looks were growing out now that he was almost twelve years old. His cheekbones were sharper and his nose a little wider; if anything he was more bloody handsome than before, but then again I was biased.
“Nope and nope,” he replied. “Why do I need to learn fractions anyway? It’s not as though I’m going to go into a shop and tell them I want two thirds of X as long as it equals Y, is it?”
