Anything. He’d do anything she wanted.
“No goodbyes. From now until I leave, I just want to do this.”
Smiling against her skin, Graham nodded. He’d always known she was perfect.
* * *
Zoey’s bags were packed. Her heart was shattering, but she’d wrapped cellophane and duct tape around what pieces were left, and she’d packed that too. It was time to go home, away from this amazing, wild place that had crawled into her soul.
It was time to leave the man who’d done the same.
“When will I see you again?” Lana asked, unusually subdued as she watched Zoey double-check their room for any forgotten items.
“When are you heading down the highway at midnight again?” Zoey shot Lana a little smile. “I’ll keep the coffee on for you.”
“Zoey? Be my assistant. Or just be my friend, and we’ll work out the finances later. I hate that we can’t spend the time together I want to spend with you. You’re the only real friend I have.”
Reaching out her arms, Zoey hugged her tight. “We both know that’s the best way to mess up a good thing. Let’s just stay in touch and see each other as often as possible.”
Lana hugged her right back, and when she pulled away, there were tears in her eyes. “Well, I don’t know about some people, but I adore the truck stop in Mudgeton. It’s the place to go, so of course I’ll be there.”
Deeply grateful for having Lana in her life, Zoey hugged her again, whispering goodbye.
The valet would have carried her suitcase, but Zoey only had the one. She wheeled it down the hall where Graham had asked her out to her favorite cinnamon roll breakfast, into the elevator they had used to escape the gala, across the lobby where Graham had lost his mind at the thought of her being left alone in the woods during a storm.
So many memories, too many memories. Good and bad and amazing and heartbreaking.
They’d already arranged for her rental car to be returned, so Zoey went to the desk instead.
An exhausted Hannah welcomed her. “Good morning, Ms. Caldwell. I hear you’re leaving us today.”
“I’m just Zoey,” she replied softly. Just Zoey. Just a tourist who was destined to leave. Maybe Graham’s ex would help him pick up the pieces of what this vacation had done to them. Maybe when Zoey got back home, she’d meet someone who could help her do the same.
“Are you okay?” Hannah asked, reaching out and squeezing her hand. “I know goodbyes are hard.”
Overwhelmed by Hannah’s kindness, Zoey had to fight not to cry.
“Some more than others.” Hesitating, she asked, “He’ll be okay, right?”
Intelligent eyes searched Zoey’s face, and Hannah’s expression softened. “He’s tough. A big marshmallow, but he’s tough as any of us up here. It’s not an easy life, but Graham’s made for it.”
Nodding, Zoey wiped at her eyes with the heel of her hand. “Good. Thank you. Umm, I need to have a car drive me to the airport, please. I called down yesterday to be put on the schedule.”
“I would, but I think I might get in trouble for letting you.” Hannah tilted her head toward the valet pickup. “He’s been out there for an hour, waiting on you.”
Through the windows, Zoey could see a moose-loved Dodge pickup truck was parked out front. A man who had changed her life, even as he opened her eyes, leaned against the hood. Gripping a single flower in his hand, he stared at the ground beneath his feet. Shoulders slumped, body language defeated.
Then Graham looked up, meeting her eyes through the glass. His gaze raked over her, his expression shifting to hunger, to pride, to so many amazing things as his body language changed.
Loving her hadn’t broken him. Her leaving, that was what was crushing them both.
“For what it’s worth, I was rooting for you two,” Hannah told her, smiling sweetly.
At her side, Quinn’s large eyes were gleaming. “I was too!”
Quinn burst into tears, leaving a groaning Hannah to attend to comforting her and Zoey to head outside.
“I thought we weren’t saying goodbye,” Zoey said, unable to keep from wrapping her arms around his waist.
“I couldn’t let the B team of Moose Springs’ rideshare drivers take you to the airport,” Graham told her, voice husky as he leaned down and rested his forehead to hers.
“What about the Tourist Trap?”
“What about it?”
Zoey exhaled a breathy laugh. “You’re incorrigible. You don’t deserve that awesome place.”
“Not at all.” Graham slipped the flower into her hand before kissing her. “I’m not letting someone else take my last moments with you.”
As she opened the passenger side door, Zoey found a roly-poly little stuffed moose sitting in the passenger seat, safely buckled in. Jake was in the back seat, his muzzle on his paws as if he knew something bad was happening.
“Jake picked that out. Something to remember us by,” Graham told her. The softness of his voice and the pain in his eyes couldn’t be hidden behind a plushy.
“He’s a happy moose.” Zoey climbed in the truck, hugging the moose to her stomach. “Thank you.”
She didn’t say that she didn’t need a happy moose to remember him. Forgetting Graham would be like forgetting how to breathe…impossible and painful when tried.
The drive to Anchorage was quiet. Every time Zoey opened her mouth to tell him they could stay in touch, they could text or call, they could visit…she closed her mouth again. They could, but all that would do was delay the inevitable.
Graham’s calloused, work-roughened hands gripped the steering wheel too hard, even though he smiled at her with that same lazy smile she loved when he caught her eye. Reaching over, he threaded his fingers through her own.
Unlike the poor steering wheel creaking beneath his clenching fist, he held her hand like it was as delicate as the flower he’d given her.
Rubbing his thumb across her knuckles, Graham pulled her wrist to his mouth, pressing the softest of kisses to the sensitive flesh. Then he pressed their entwined fingers to the top of his thigh as if holding her close just a little longer.
“Gonna miss you, darlin’.”
Four words, and they cut into her soul.
“You’re going to have a lot more free time to harass the poor tourists that come after me,” Zoey joked.
He opened his mouth to make a joke, then closed it. “You know what? They’re not so bad.”
Counting to three silently in her head, Zoey waited for the pinched expression to come to his face, as if his words tasted of sour lemons. “You’re so full of it,” she teased.
“Yeah, I hate them. Super-duper can’t stand them.” Shooting her a grin, Graham shrugged. “Sorry, Zo, I can only make exceptions for you.”
“Graham? People love you. It’s okay to let them.”
A pained expression crossed his handsome features, but Zoey plunged on, twisting to face him as the airport came into view at the end of the road.
“It’s okay to be good at something you weren’t planning on, and it’s okay to enjoy being successful.” She squeezed his fingers, hard. “Maybe it wasn’t the plan, and it wasn’t the dream, but you have a good life. You don’t have to be embarrassed by your success. Use it to make your dreams happen. Let the masses buy a million reindeer dogs and then go attack cedar logs with your chainsaw like a crazy guy. You’ve earned the right to have the things you want.”
Nodding, Graham didn’t say anything. But his eyes said it all as he pulled up to the curb in front of the airport and turned to her.
“I can park in short-term parking,” he offered, voice quiet, gaze scraping over her form. “I can wait with you for a while.”
Zoey shook her head. “And drag this out? I’m barely keeping from bawling like a baby right now.”
She turned ar
ound in the seat to say goodbye to Jake, running her fingers one last time through the border collie’s silky coat. “Take care of him, Jake.”
When Jake whined, Zoey dropped a kiss to the end of his nose. “You’re a good dog. And he’s a good man. Don’t let him forget, okay?”
Zoey could feel the heat of tears stinging her eyes, even if she’d managed to keep them from falling. That lasted up until the moment his strong hands carefully cupped her face.
Gripping his biceps for strength, Zoey closed her eyes. “I don’t like this part,” she whispered, voice catching on the words.
“Me either.” His thumbs brushed the wetness sliding down her cheeks. “Zoey? Some women walk in a room and turn a guy inside out. You turned me inside out, and I’ve never enjoyed anything more. Losing a woman like you screws a guy up good and hard.” Graham’s arms shook, but his hands slid into her hair, his forehead against hers. Voice thick with emotion, he said, “Screwed up or not, I wouldn’t change the last two weeks for the world.”
This kiss, their last one, lingered too long. A security guard started toward the truck, waving them on.
“Goodbye, Graham,” she whispered.
“Goodbye, Zoey.”
And then he let his hands drop.
There was nothing left to do. Zoey grabbed her Alaska bag and her suitcase and got out of the truck. By the time she reached the sliding door of the terminal entrance and looked back over her shoulder, Graham was gone.
* * *
As love stories went, Graham was pretty sure this one sucked.
The gas pedal wasn’t his friend, and the planes coming in low over the inlet just rubbed this deeper into his soul. But he couldn’t ask her to stay. Zoey was a strong, beautiful, independent woman, and he couldn’t ask her to give up her life for his, no matter how much he wanted her. Even if he did, she’d say no. This wasn’t a movie, there wasn’t anything he could do, and adding that bit of rejection would only sour what had been the most bittersweet goodbye of his life.
There was a long drive between Anchorage and Moose Springs, and it was probably going to take every single one of those miles to convince himself that this was the right thing. He’d had to let her go. And after her, there would never be another tourist. Locals only, he was done. Graham couldn’t do this to himself again. After her…
The road blurred, and Graham cursed, pulling over into the bird sanctuary just south of Anchorage. Across the road was a gun range, and the dichotomy of the two normally made him snort. Right now, nothing seemed funny. Nothing was right, nothing was good, nothing in his life fit anymore, not the way they’d fit. Somehow, for some reason completely beyond him, Zoey had fit him, and he’d fit her perfectly.
He wanted her shyness, her enthusiasm, her bravery, her recklessness, her strength. Her atrocious attempts at karaoke. Her arms around him as he slept. Zoey had the kind of drive Graham had never had in his own life, an ability to keep pushing on where he would have—where he had—rolled over and given up.
Inhaling a hard breath, Graham rubbed his fist over his chest.
He hoped she found someone who loved her this much. Someone who thought it was cute when her glasses slipped on her nose. Someone who liked her tucked beneath his arm. Someone who gave a crap when those gorgeous eyes filled with tears. Someone Graham would have to kill, because the idea of her with someone else made him want to punch something.
The heart in his chest was clawing its way out, abandoning him for her. And his ass was sitting in his truck, doing nothing.
Paralyzed. Torn between fighting for what he needed and the fear of losing his dream again. She was art school all over, and he was sitting here and just taking it.
“Jake, I think I need a little help here.” At Graham’s soft whistle, the border collie hopped the seat divider, wiggling into his lap. Wrapping his arms around his puppy as tight as he dared, Graham picked up Jake and hugged him for a really long time, face buried in a furry neck.
After he had been thoroughly bathed in kisses, Graham sighed and returned Jake to the back seat.
“Get yourself together.” Dragging his palms over his face, Graham shook his head. “It’s just a girl.”
His girl. The only girl he ever wanted for the rest of his stupid, freaking life.
Hands shaking, Graham set the hazard lights and pulled out his phone. It rang twice before she picked up. “Hey, Ash, I need a wingman right now. I just dropped off Zoey.” Graham’s voice was ragged and harsh in his ears. “Tell me to keep driving.”
“Are you asking me for permission to be an idiot? Because you’ve never needed my permission before.”
He didn’t say anything, unable to formulate a sentence that didn’t start and end with how messed up this was.
There was silence, then Ash added softly, “Graham? You love each other. It’s okay to be upset. She’s probably crying right now too.”
Well. It was one thing for him to be upset, but when it was her? That just wouldn’t do.
“Ash, I think I’m going to go do something stupid.”
“Thank goodness.” She exhaled heavily. “What took you so long? Easton put a hundred down that you wouldn’t even make it to the airport.”
“I like to draw things out and make it hard on everyone.” Graham spun a three-point turn in the gravel, his suspension system protesting when he backed over a curb.
“Go get her, cowboy,” Ash said, hanging up the phone.
That was exactly what Graham was planning. He had no idea what he was going to do when he got to her. He had no clue what to say, but he figured he’d start with, “Here’s my heart and guts on a silver platter” and go from there.
“Come on,” he snarled as the traffic grew heavier as he got closer to the airport. “Come on. How many people are leaving today? Is it mass exodus from Anchorage day?”
The airport was small, but this was the height of the tourist season. With so many visitors taking morning flights, the single road in and out of the airport was jam-packed with cars.
Smacking his hand on the steering wheel in frustration, Graham was forced to slow to a crawl. “Seriously? There was no one here before!”
Her plane was leaving soon, and he didn’t have time for this. Graham’s heart buried itself somewhere below the bench seat. Finally, he’d had enough. Pulling to the side of the road, he hit the hazard lights.
“Come on, buddy,” Graham said as he got out and opened the door. Slipping a leash on Jake, he tucked him into the crook of his arm and started running.
Graham was more of a stand and chop things type of guy rather than a sprint half a mile type of guy, but he wasn’t too out of shape. Breathless but still alive by the time he reached the terminal, he ignored the long line of people waiting to get their tickets and cut his way in front.
“I need to get back to the gates,” Graham told the airline attendant at the desk. “It’s an emergency.”
“I’m sorry, sir, but you’re going to have to wait in line like everyone else. And you can’t have that dog in here unsedated and uncrated.”
“Don’t worry, he’s chill. And I’m talking an actual emergency.”
“What’s the emergency?”
Graham smacked his palms down on the desk. “Love story shit. Please, help a guy out.”
“Sir. End of the line.”
Well. This was about to get ugly.
It was a well-known truth for any traveler that jumping a security line was “frowned upon” and would probably result in consequences that Graham wouldn’t enjoy, but he was kind of on a deadline here. So without further ado, he did just that.
Thank goodness the line was guarded by only two people, and both only blinked in surprise instead of tasing him when Graham hopped the gate holding Jake under one arm like a football. He flattened himself along the side of the tube-shaped X-ray machine, startling the poor m
an already standing inside.
“Good morning. Nice jacket. How you doing? Don’t worry, guys. I’m not a terrorist. Jake, say hi.”
With a bark, Jake did as he was asked. Graham bolted for the terminal, taking the stairs two at a time because there were way too many people on the escalators. Graham wasn’t stupid. He knew he was in trouble, so he embraced his inner spy movie hero, stealing a shirt from the outside of the gift shop that he definitely would pay them back for. Pausing to pull on the bright orange and slightly too-tight shirt then stuffing his baseball cap in his back pocket, his disguise was complete.
“Try to be cool, boy,” Graham muttered as he scooped up Jake again. In an airport this small, there were only two options: terminal to the left of the ginormous stuffed moose and terminal to the right of the ginormous stuffed moose. Dropping down to a fast walk to not draw any more attention, Graham took a chance and turned left at the moose, down the direction it was facing.
“Show me the way, big guy,” Graham murmured, patting it on the nose as he passed, ignoring the cries of dismay from a blond and a brunette as he stepped through their selfie shot.
“Anna, he ruined it,” the blond wailed as Graham checked the departure screen and saw Zoey’s plane was boarding from gate three. But gate three was right in front of him.
He didn’t see her.
She was flying to Chicago via Seattle, and it only took Graham a moment to double-check her flight on the departures screen. He was at the right place, but that gate was empty of people except for a lone flight attendant still manning the ticket counter.
“No.” He ran over, but the door was already closed and locked. “No no no, it’s still here. Let me in.”
“Sir, you can’t go in there,” the flight attendant told him. “Sir. The plane’s leaving.”
“I need to talk to someone on that plane. Just for a second, that’s all I need. Can you radio the plane?”
The flight attendant kept shaking her head. “Sir, I’m sorry. It’s too late.”
The Tourist Attraction (Moose Springs, Alaska) Page 32
