Her heart shivered as she tried to rid herself of the feelings she had for Alden. Though she tried endlessly to bury those pestering feelings, they kept rising to the surface as a persistent lump in her throat, every time she heard his name mentioned, or happened to get a glimpse of him.
Alain, on the other hand, was not at all like herself. Where, before, she had protested wildly against Katherine's claim to be her sister, she now seemed to quietly accept the fact. She had previously sulked at the attention Alden paid Katherine. Now she seemed willing to let them be alone. She found excuses to exclude herself from any of their activities. Katie found this hard to believe since Alain could hardly be pried from Alden's side in the past. She never mentioned again to Katie that she knew something about Katherine which would prove her to be a fraud. She never even protested when Katherine began taking over duties that previously had been her own domain.
Also, Alain never confided in Katie anymore, and very seldom even chatted lightly with her. She was quiet and solemn now, always watching from a distance. She was not the gay bubbling Alain Katie had met when she first came to Winslow Hall. Alain looked at Katie now rather sadly, when she looked at her at all. Usually her eyes darted away whenever Katie tried to hold Alain's gaze. She seemed languid most of the time, and Katie assumed it was because she had at last reconciled herself to the idea that Katherine really was her sister, and there wasn't anything she could do about it.
Were those accusations Alain had made against Katherine earlier, only wishful thinking on Alain's part? Had it all just been something Alain had made up to keep everything unsure? It was all so confusing.
Even with all the turmoil, Katie did not want to leave Winslow Hall. She was not really sure what it was about the place that seemed to pull at her and prompt her to stay. Whenever she contemplated leaving, she felt a terrible deadness inside her. Everything about the house captivated her, and her determination to get to the bottom of all the strange events happening around her, would not let her entertain the thought of leaving. Even the worry that someone there wanted to be rid of her was not enough incentive to make her leave.
Perhaps it was not so much Winslow Hall, but the fact that she did not want to leave her new found family, or Alden. It was strange, she did not trust Alden, yet she could not face the thought of never seeing him again either. She felt she had to prove to herself without a trace of doubt that Alden truly was her enemy, before she gave up hope and put Winslow Hall and all those connected with it behind her.
She thought how ironic it was that everyone except Alain and Katherine knew of her relationship to them, yet she felt she could not openly divulge the truth. Not until she was sure of what was going on behind it all. It was foolish of her to stay and possibly be at risk of another life threatening accident to occur, but she was not prepared to leave until she could rid herself of that indefatigable feeling she had for a man she hardly knew. She had to know in her heart of hearts that Alden was the one she should fear, before she turned her back on him forever.
Katherine's maid arrived, and just as Katie had speculated, she brought all of Katherine’s personal belongings with her, which the footmen brought into the house and deposited wherever Katherine instructed. However, in spite of her maid’s arrival, Katherine had apparently decided to let Alain keep Katie on, since she never gave Katie notice. Perhaps Katie had Alden to thank for that, though, she thought. So Katie busied herself with her work and tried not to think ahead more than one day at a time. Sometimes a nagging thought about her future would pester her, but she would tell herself there was plenty of time to make definite plans later.
Fall came in silently, bringing frosty nights and chillier days. The leaves were turning copper, gold, and deep red, scattering themselves in a thick carpet over green lawns. Though they added color to everything and danced about on little whirl-winds, Katie couldn't seem to engulf herself in the beauty of the season. She was too worried about what she should do.
Since the day her saddle had broken, nothing unusual had happened to her. She had requested the cinch be repaired, and had ridden out on her own several times after that. She was beginning to think that perhaps, she had imagined the chinch being partially cut. Maybe she had jumped to conclusions, because of mysteriously being trapped in the secret passage, just the night before.
She had saved enough money over the six months she had been at Winslow Hall to enable her to travel to some large city and look for a more secure position, but still she could not bring herself to think of leaving. Not now, anyway. Not until she knew for certain if it was Alden who locked her in the passage, or knew the reason why her saddle cinch really broke?
She thought of going back to Windy Gates, but there was really nothing there for her, as her father had tried to point out to her. She decided, though, that she would have to make a visit to Windy Gates before the bad weather set in, to check on her house and close it against the winter storms. There were also things she had left behind that she had missed and wanted to have with her. Katie approached Alain about the journey one evening during a fitting for a new dinner gown.
"If you are sure you want to make such a long trip by yourself, I have no objection to your going," Alain said absently. "You must be very brave to even try to undertake such a journey like that alone. Alden told me about your cinch breaking. I understand it has been repaired, but what if your horse should throw a shoe, or stumble? Aren't you worried that next time you may fall on your head, or break a leg?"
"I hope there will not be a next time Alain," Katie stated. "Besides, I will be alright. I have taken the trip before, and in a storm to boot. I shall check everything thoroughly before I leave."
"If you feel capable, then do so. After all, I am not your keeper, you may do as you wish," Alain said almost indifferently. "As for myself, I would not want to jeopardize my life so carelessly. I understand there are highwaymen and all manner of dangers for an unescorted lady to worry about. Why is it so important for you to go back to your little shack anyway?"
"I cannot just leave it for the winter! When I left I thought I would only be gone a short time. I did not bother to secure the shutters or close the damper on the chimney. Woodland animals may find a way in to nest over the winter if I don't make sure it is closed tight. Besides, some of my belongings are still there, and my mother's things. I would like to have some of them with me if I intend to stay away over the winter. I'm sure those rumors about highway men are exaggerated out of all proportion anyway," Katie insisted. "Do not worry on my behalf."
"I cannot forbid you to do whatever you feel is necessary. You are free to leave my employ at any time you wish, if it ever comes to that."
"I did not say I wished to leave your employ," Katie explained. "I only want to take a leave of absence to close my house and have a few things sent to Winslow Hall, if that is all right with you."
"Certainly, do whatever you wish," Alain agreed.
"Then I shall plan to leave sometime next week, if that will be convenient."
"That will be fine if my gown has been finished by then," Alain answered.
Alain seemed almost indifferent about everything, and Katie could identify with her. The only reason she was staying, herself, was because something unexplainable was holding her to Winslow Hall. It could be Maggie, she thought, because she had seemed to step in and take the place of Katie’s own mother, in a comforting way. Maggie would be upset, if she thought Katie was thinking of leaving permanently.
Katie began to plan for her trip back to Windy Gates. She reminded herself to be sure and check all of her tack and Chance's feet before she left. She would start early so she would reach Windy Gates before dusk, since the days were getting shorter now. She had made the mistake of misjudging the time it took to get to Emerson Manor when she had left the last time, and at this time of year, there was more chance of running into bad weather, she reminded herself.
Katie did not feel as easy about taking the trip alone as she had led Alain to
believe. However she did not feel she could ask Katherine for the use of a groom or footman for the trip and Alain apparently had no say concerning the staff any longer. There was something about Katherine that made Katie want to avoid her as much as she tried to avoid James Langdon.
It was a couple of days later, when she was passing through the garden, she happened to hear Alden and Alain talking together. She hadn't meant to stop and listen, but she heard her name and decided that if they were speaking about her she had every right to hear what they had to say.
"Do you mean to tell me that Katie is planning to ride off to Windy Gates without an escort? I will not stand by and let her do such a foolhardy thing. What is the matter with that girl? She is as scattered-brained as you are, Alain. Last time, she tried making the trip she got caught in a storm. Couldn't you offer her a groom to take along with her, or insist she take a buggy and driver?"
Alain sounded agitated. "You sound like her guardian." she scoffed. "I have no say concerning the staff anymore. If Katie wanted a groom or a buggy, she could go to Katherine. I am not responsible for her anyway. She only works here. I have no jurisdiction over her personal business. Besides, she is older than I am and would hardly listen to what I have to suggest. Why should you worry so, anyway? She is only a seamstress. You cannot go around protecting everyone, Alden. Let Katie take care of her own problems."
Alden was not listening. "Where is Katie? I'd like to talk to her about this crazy undertaking she is planning."
"You are wasting your time, Alden. She will not listen to you. Haven't you seen how she hides herself away in her room every time you come to Winslow Hall? What did you do to her to cause her to treat you like the plague? If I were you I would just let her do as she pleases."
"Nonsense, she may despise me, for reasons I have yet to discover, but she is not so stupid that she will not listen to reason."
"Then try and reason with her, if you must. I don't know why you bother? She is just some stray that happened upon your doorstep. Why do you persist in catering to her so?"
"There are some things that you are not aware of Alain. Katie deserves more than she is getting right now, and if I had not pledged silence I would inform you of them.'
"What are you talking about Alden? What is there to know of Katie that makes her so important?"
"It is not my place to tell you. When she is ready, perhaps she will tell you herself."
"I think both she, and you, are addled, along with my long lost sister! When the truth comes out, and I shall root it out, never fear, my long lost sister and that headstrong seamstress of yours will be history."
"Give it up, Alain. Katherine has already secured her position here. When will you admit that she belongs here in her rightful place?"
"Never, Alden, never, never, never!" With that Alain turned on her heal and tromped out of the garden.
Katie stood for a moment thinking over what Alden had said. Was he really as concerned about her as he appeared to be? Or was he merely keeping tabs on her actions, making sure he knew everything she was doing so it would be easy for him or someone else to plan another accident for her?
Alain seemed to think he was trying to protect her, but if that was so, why had he lied about the cinch breaking? There were too many unanswered questions for Katie to feel secure about Alden's part in past events. Alain too, had not given up on her accusations concerning Katherine, as Katie had thought she had. Apparently Alain had no other choice but to go along with what the lawyers accepted as proof, whether she believed Katherine to be her sister or not. Only it hurt her to hear Alain talk about the seamstress becoming history. Katie thought Alain liked her work, and that they were almost friends. Now she wondered even about that?
Katie turned to slip away from the garden unnoticed. In her haste, her shoe hit a rough rise in the walkway where the roots of a tree had pushed the bricking up out of place. Clumsily, she tripped, falling headlong into a bush next to the walk.
Before she could pick herself up, Alden was towering over her, a smile erasing the stern expression on his face. When he looked at her that way, Katie found it hard to believe that he was plotting against her in some way.
"Why, there you are Katie." A chuckled escaped his throat, as he gave her his hand and pulled her to her feet. "Spying in the bushes, are you?"
Katie could feel the color come to her cheek, embarrassed that he should find her in such an incriminating position. There was really no way to hide the fact that she had indeed been eavesdropping.
"I would not call it spying," she defended herself. "Why would I want to spy on you?"
"I have no idea unless it is for the same reason you have been trying to avoid me. I can't think why you wish to do that either."
"I...I have...not been avoiding you. I... have just been busy," Katie informed him.
"You do not expect me to believe that far-fetched explanation, do you?" Alden’s face took on a stern expression. "You might as well be honest with me, Katie. I want to know what is going on around here."
"You want to know what is going on." The words exploded from Katie’s mouth. "I am the one who has been pushed from a balcony, locked in the passage, and had my saddle cinch cut so it would break, and you want to know what is going on? I am the one who wants to know what is going on!" Katie spun on her heel in her anger, and started to leave, but Alden grabbed her wrist.
"Not so fast, Katie, you cannot get away from me that easily." He roughly pulled Katie back to him. "So you discovered your cinch had been cut. Is that why you have been avoiding me all this time? Is that why you returned to the house on foot when I went to find your horse? You can’t imagine what I thought when I came back and you were gone. For all I knew someone had come to finish you off! I was relieved to discover you made it safely home, but I need some explanations."
Katie wrenched her wrist free, and glared at Alden. "You...you have no right to...treat me like this. I need not answer to you. You have treated me as if you were my guardian from the start. I am not your ward! I can do as I please. All you have done, from the day I met you is try to run my affairs. You got me this position, and you gave me clothes, and a horse. You advise me what I should and should not do. You've...you've even tried to tell me how I should think and feel. Well, Lord Alden Emerson, of Emerson Manor, your title does not give you liberty to run my life, and I shall not be intimidated by you any longer."
"Intimidated?" Now Alden was becoming as infuriated as Katie. "You think I am intimidating you? Running your life? You little ungrateful slip of a girl! I have been trying to help you! Can't you see that?"
"Help me? Oh, now you are being absurd. I must say, you were very helpful when you tried to make me think that my chinch had broken because of weak leather," she fumed, not realizing that she had betrayed herself in letting Alden know that she suspected him.
"Oh..., now I see why you despise me so. I suppose you think I cut your saddle and was trying to cover it up. Where do you come up with these numskull ideas of yours? You're so damn sure that someone is trying to do away with you, but why Katie? You have become so obsessed that you even suspect me!"
He placed his hands on her shoulders and looked down at her seriously. Katie's heart leapt, but she did not try to pull away. "Listen to me Katie. I knew the leather had been cut, but I didn't want to point it out to you because you would have added it to everything else that had happened, and get hysterical over it. I thought I could find who was doing these things to scare you and discover why they wanted to frighten you so?
“I brought you here Katie, and I feel responsible for what happens to you. I am convinced that perhaps someone may be playing mean tricks on you, and I wanted to spare you the extra worry until I could get to the bottom of all this. I see I have only succeeded in making you worry even more. I'm sorry Katie, I should have told you right off."
Katie's eyes searched Alden's face. Could she really believe what he was telling her? Was this just another way to keep her from suspecting hi
m? He talked as though she was just another hysterical woman who jumped to conclusions. She had every right to feel suspicion towards him, but he was looking at her so tenderly, that it caused her heart to pound furiously. The urge to hide her head against his shoulder pulled at her. She wanted to pledge her undying trust in him, only something restrained her. She could not fully trust Alden until she could uncover the reasons for all the things that had happened to her. Wary for her safety, she decided to let Alden think she had decided to trust him.
"I'm...I'm sorry if I suspected you Alden. However, you have to agree, I don't truly know you or anyone here. I...I am scared. There is no reason why someone should play these mean tricks as you call them. I am not a threat to anyone, so why am I treated so?" Katie asked meekly.
"I cannot answer that for you, Katie, but trust me, I am going to discover who is trying to scare you like this and why."
"Do you really think they are only trying to scare me Alden? When my cinch broke I could have fallen and broken my neck instead of just hurt my elbow, and when I fell from the balcony I would have plunged to my death, if that servant hadn't come to my rescue. Is that the way someone scares someone?" She felt that Alden was taking it all too lightly.
"I cannot see a reason why someone would wish you dead, Katie. If your relationship to James is a threat to anyone, I could only imagine they might try to scare you away, not kill you."
"Do you think maybe Katherine knows about me, and doesn't want me causing complications? I know she does not like me very much."
"It is hard to believe that Katherine would do these things. She couldn't have pushed you from the balcony because she was with us, and she was at the ball the night you were trapped in the passage and didn't even know who the Snow Queen was."
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