by Ellie Wade
Ollie laughs. “It’s Saki.” He bends and picks up his cat.
“Oh, right.” I scrunch up my face and take in the unfortunate creature in his arms.
“Why are you giving her that look?” He raises a brow. “Don’t even tell me you hate cats or something because she’s a deal breaker.”
“No, I love all animals. She’s just a lot to take in at first.” Seriously, is he blind? The cat is scary-looking.
“Because she’s so stunning?” His crystal blues peer down at me.
“Uh, yeah. Totally.”
He chuckles and kisses the cat’s head. “Don’t worry. In an hour, you’ll be in love with her. She has that effect on people.”
I follow Ollie onto his back deck. He gives Saki another squeeze and then sets her down. She purrs and rubs herself against his leg.
“I thought I’d grill since it’s such a nice night. You like shrimp and veggie kabobs?”
“Yeah, sounds good.” I take a seat on the porch swing as Ollie starts the grill. Saki stretches out in an area of sunlight coming through a patch in the treed canopy above. “What happened to her leg and eye? And why does she look like two cats sewn together?”
“Well, it was the summer after my senior year of high school. I had finished rehab and was struggling a bit. I saw this old Kawasaki bike in a junkyard, so I decided to buy it and fix it up. When I was at the dump, I found Saki as a kitten. She was hiding under a heap of metal and was missing an eye and a leg. I don’t know what happened to her, but I took her home with me and named her after the bike that brought me to her. She’s been my constant companion for twenty years. I rescued her from that junkyard, but I think we saved each other. It was her, fixing that bike, and eventually riding it that kept me clean that first year. It was a rough part of my life.”
“That’s sweet.” I look at the skinny little thing and try to see her the way in which Ollie does…but, gosh, she looks rough. “That makes sense. I thought you named her sake after the Japanese wine, which I thought was a little odd given your sobriety.”
Ollie chuckles. “No, at eighteen years old, I don’t think I knew what Sake was. Alcohol wasn’t my vice. And as far as her fur, I have no idea. Her coloring is unlike anything I’ve seen. She really does look like part one cat, part another. Adds to her charm, I guess.”
“Yeah.” I nod, trying to hide my thoughts from my face.
Ollie laughs. “I promise. Give her a day. She’s literally the sweetest.”
As if on cue, Saki hops up into the swing and bumps her head under my hand, an invitation for me to pet her. “She’s skinny.”
“She’s old. I feed her all the time, and the good high-fattening canned stuff, but she can’t keep on weight the same as she used to.”
She purrs loudly as I pet her head, and every now and then, she sneaks a lick against my hand, making me giggle.
I rock in the swing, pet Saki, and watch Ollie grill, and it’s perfect.
“What do you think about Alma and Amos?” I ask him of our mutual friends.
He turns a row of kabobs with his metal tongs.
“I think it’s great. Amos is a good guy, and he loves Alma and Love. That’s all the matters. Leo would be happy. You know he’d want his girls to be happy and cherished.”
“Yeah, I think it’s a good match, too.” I pause. “Do you think about Leo a lot?”
A wistful smile crosses his face, and he looks past me as if lost in thought. “Every single day. I miss him.”
“Do you think he’s happy wherever he is?”
Ollie’s gaze finds me. “Absolutely,” he says with conviction.
I shake my head. “I don’t know how you do what you do. I mean, I couldn’t deal with loss like losing people that are so close to you. I just couldn’t.”
“Yeah, that part sucks, but I don’t lose them all. In fact, most make it, and it makes me feel good knowing that I was a little part of someone’s happiness.”
“That’s true. It would be a good feeling.”
“Every happily ever after makes the hard stuff worth it. And I get these people. I’ve been there. I don’t judge them. They connect with me, and sometimes—only me. I truly think most people are capable of fighting the worst demons if they have at least one person in their corner, one person fighting along with them. Everyone needs to know they’re not alone.”
“That’s what Alma used to say when I asked her how she turned out so good despite her horrible childhood. She said she had Amos, and he believed in her and supported her, so she felt she could do anything.”
Ollie nods. “I believe that. One person really can change someone’s life.”
We chat more about our day while we eat dinner outside in the warm breeze. In all the years I’ve known Ollie, I’ve dreamed about this exact scenario—coming home from work to good food and good conversation with the most beautiful man I’ve ever known. It really doesn’t get better than this.
I could get used to this life. It feels right.
After dinner, I help Ollie take in the dishes. All the while, Saki stays at my feet, purring and rubbing against me. I think I’ve realized that she’s so skinny because all of her daily calorie intake goes into fueling her robust purring habit.
“If you want a break from her at your feet, give her a can of her food. They’re right there in the pantry.” He nods toward a white door on the other end of the kitchen. “She’ll love you forever, and she likes to nap after eating.” He grins.
I take his advice and grab a can of food for her. “It’s not that I mind. I just feel like I’m going to step on her, and I don’t want to hurt her,” I say, scooping the food out into her dish before throwing the can in the recycle bin.
“Well, eventually, you’ll realize that it’s just easier to pick her up and carry her everywhere, which is what she likes.”
“Ah, so that’s her motive.”
“Pretty much.”
We’ve finished loading the dishwasher and cleaning up. I dry my hands off on a towel and turn to find Ollie staring at me.
“It’s crazy how much I missed you today.” He shakes his head with a laugh. Taking a step forward, he takes hold of my hips. “It’s like I’ve been trying to stay away from you for so long, and now that I can touch you whenever I want, it’s all I want to do.”
I wrap my arms around his neck. “I know.”
“Everything about you captivates me. Your body draws me in to the point of heady intoxication. The only thing I can relate it to is chasing a high, and it scares me. I don’t ever want to be reliant on anything again.”
My chest swells, and I cup Ollie’s face. “You don’t have to be afraid of me. I’m not a drug, Ollie, because I would never hurt you, and what you feel with me is real, not chemically induced. This type of high, the kind we’re both feeling, is good and natural. Does it feel like you’re falling, and even though you have no idea what you’ll reach at the bottom, the fall is so thrilling that you want to fall faster, harder, and longer?”
He nods, kissing my lips. “Something like that.”
“That’s called falling in love, and it’s the best high there is.”
Chapter 22
Ollie
Quinn pulls her Jeep into a spot in front of Lion’s Lair, an organization that my late friend Leo and his wife, Alma, set up years ago. It’s now run by Alma and her best friend, Amos. Well, they’re more than best friends now, I suppose. Alma and Amos have been dating for several months. The Lair has so many programs that help children to young adults with issues ranging from school to drug programs to financial supports. If there’s a need in the community, Alma makes sure the Lair provides a solution. This place is a gem, a true gift for the people they serve.
Alma lends out the gym to programs that need space to hold meetings or events. In tonight’s case, the gym is reserved for a self-defense class run by a local police officer, which is why Clementine has opened her door and is jumping out of the back seat before the vehicle’s eng
ine is shut off. This is her second self-defense class here, and she’s been looking forward to it all week. I’m sure it has nothing to do with the, and I quote, “hot god,” who runs the class, Jude.
“Jude better be careful with that one coming his way.” I chuckle, watching Clementine’s fire-red hair bounce against her back as she disappears into the building.
Quinn shakes her head. “He’s used to it. He can handle himself.”
“Yeah, he’s a good guy.”
“He is. He’s actually dating, or at least trying to date, a friend of mine.” Quinn swings the driver’s side door open and hops out.
“Trying to date?” I step around the front of the car, extending my hand out toward her.
She slips her hand into mine. “Yeah. She’s hesitant about it. I don’t know why.”
I furrow my brow, causing Quinn to laugh. “Not because I want him or anything, but he is a catch. So I don’t get the hesitancy.” She halts her step and twists her body to face me. “Jude’s hot and all, but you, Ollie Hale, are perfection. There’s no one else for me.”
Her words, so sincere, cause a pang of something to shoot through my chest—panic comes to mind, but that doesn’t seem right. It’s a combination of fear and lust and adoration all at once. Quinn’s the only woman to ever elicit such a plethora of emotions within me, most of which I can’t accurately decipher.
I smile down at the beauty before me. The tiny golden specks in her bright greens are sparkling in the light of the descending sun. Her full lips—one of my favorite features—constantly call out to me, begging to be kissed.
I press my lips to her, and she sighs.
I’m falling for her.
I should’ve known she’d win in the end. Fighting this attraction for so many years was futile. Quinn Kirkpatrick is someone who gets what she wants.
I’m hers.
As much as that thought freaks me the fuck out, it’s true, and it’s about time I accept it.
I lean back, breaking our connection. “Are you going to the class?”
“No. I’ve taken it several times. I can kick your ass if I need to,” she kids.
“Is that so?”
“Oh, definitely. I can take you down.”
I laugh. Quinn’s tiny. I have a hard time imagining her taking down anyone. But I know Jude teaches the women ways to stop a potential attacker that doesn’t require brute strength.
Fingers threaded together, we continue toward the building. “Well, for my sake, I hope you never have to.”
“Me too. That would be counterproductive to all the things I’d rather do instead.” She shoots me a grin.
“Oh my goodness!” Alma cheers the second we open the glass entryway doors. “You two are so cute together. I love it so much.”
Alma hugs us both.
Amos is right behind her. He extends his hand toward me after giving Quinn a hug. “How’re you doing, man?”
“Good,” I answer. “No complaints.”
“Clementine barely had time to say hi as she raced toward the gym,” Alma says with a chuckle.
“Oh yeah. She’s super into self-defense.” Quinn grins.
“Hope you came with your appetites because Alma had enough tacos to feed an army delivered,” Amos says.
Quinn raises her arms in cheer. “Tacos!”
“Of course. Only the best for my favorites,” Alma answers her before addressing me. “And Love is setting up a tea party for her Uncle Ollie as we speak.”
“I bet she is.” I chuckle.
“You know you’re her favorite tea party guest,” Alma says.
We follow Alma and Amos toward her office.
“Why is that? What is it about me that screams tea party?”
Alma looks back toward me before opening her office door. “I think she just knows how much you love them.” She shoots me a wink.
“Right,” I draw out.
I’m not a huge kid person, in all honesty. Most little kids annoy me, but Love never has. She’s the most adorable three-year-old I’ve ever seen. She looks a lot like her dad with dark hair and bright blue eyes. Leo was one of the best, and I miss him. I feel close to my friend when I’m around his daughter. It’s almost as if she carries his spirit somehow. It’s probably just wishful thinking, but nonetheless, I see him in her.
“Quinny! Owwie!” Love calls out when we walk through the door. She hasn’t mastered her ‘L’ sounds, and my name coming from her lips makes me smile every time. She runs over to us, and Quinn pulls her into a hug.
She hugs me after Quinn, and says, “I made us a tea pawdy.”
Sure enough, her pink plastic princess cups are set up on the small table by the window.
“That’s awesome, Lovie. I can’t wait. Are we going to eat Tacos with our tea?” The room carries the aroma of a Mexican restaurant, and it smells good.
She nods excitedly.
“Perfect. I can’t wait.”
We chat—Quinn and Alma more so than the rest of us—eat our tacos, and drink our “tea,” aka lemonade.
I’ve been in the same room with this group of people countless times over the past eight years. It’s comforting and feels like home. I love Alma like a sister and would do anything for her and her family. As I clink my teacup against Love’s in a “cheers,” I think about how my role as a sponsor comes with some heartache, it’s outshined by the love that comes with it. And just maybe, I can let go of this underlying worry and trust that it’s all going to be just fine.
We drop Clementine off at her apartment and head back to my place.
“Let’s go for a ride,” Quinn says, pulling into my driveway.
“It’s dark.”
“I know, but I’m in the mood for a ride.” She shrugs.
“Are you turning into a biker chick right before my eyes?” I quirk a brow.
“No,” she protests, flipping her long blond hair away from her face. “But I like it. It’s a rare warm October night. Maybe one of the last ones. I don’t think we should waste it.”
“Okay. Let’s go.”
Helmets on, we straddle the bike seat, and I pull out of the driveway. Quinn’s right. It’s abnormally warm for this time of year and an ideal night for a ride. I love feeling Quinn’s body behind me. She’s so close, her arms wrapped so tight I can feel the heat of her body amidst the night air that whooshes around us.
I take us out of town toward the rural area that lies outside of Ann Arbor. We pass empty fields, already cut and harvested and acres of woods.
As always, when I’m on my bike, I feel free and with Quinn behind me—happy.
Her hands move up under my shirt, and she splays her palms across my chest. I pull in a sharp breath when her fingers circle my taut nipples. She lowers her touch as her fingers slide into the front of my jeans before pulling them out and unbuttoning my jeans.
Releasing a hand from the bike handle, I clasp her hands beneath mine. “I don’t think that’s a good idea,” I yell back toward her.
“I think it is,” she says, barely audible through my helmet and the rushing wind.
She wiggles her hand beneath my grasp and manages to pull down my zipper. I inhale a sharp breath as she finds her way beneath my boxer briefs. I return my hand to the bike handle feeling the need to steady us.
She starts to move her hands up and down along my shaft as her body moves against my back.
Fuck.
I slow down. Spotting a small clearing between two large oaks, I steer us off the road and into the woods just far enough to hide us from a passing vehicle. Coming to a stop, I turn off the bike and hit the kickstand with my boot. I remove Quinn’s hands from my boxers and slide off the bike.
“That’s a dangerous game, babe. You know I can’t concentrate when you’re doing that.”
She takes my hand and swings her leg over, stepping down from the bike. She splays her hands over my chest once more. “I know, but I couldn’t help it.”
“No?” My voice is low as
she works her magic touch down my torso. This time, she pulls my jeans and boxers down until they’re mid-thigh.
The moon is full tonight, and it shines through the treetops, making everything about Quinn even more beautiful.
“No,” she says as her hand circles me and starts moving faster.
I step back until the bark of the wide tree behind me scratches my skin through my shirt.
Quinn straightens up on her tiptoes and kisses my neck. “Sometimes, just being near you makes me so horny I can’t resist you,” she says in a whisper as she peppers kisses against my skin. “I feel like I need to touch you, or I’ll die.”
“Well, that’s…a little…dramatic,” I say through shallow breaths as her hand moves faster.
“I’ve never claimed to be anything but.” She grins and drops to her knees, taking me into her mouth.
I let out a moan into the night air. “Fuck, Quinn.”
Eyes closed, the back of my head leaning against the tree, I finger her hair as her head moves below. My muscles begin to tighten, and stars appear beneath my eyelids. I grasp her shoulders and push her back.
“Not. Yet,” I pant.
She takes my hand, and I pull her up from the ground, twisting her around to change places. She leans against the tree as I pull off her shoes and remove her jeans and panties. Wanting to see her bare in the moonlight, I take off her bra and shirt.
“Ollie,” she whines, pulling my head down toward hers and connecting her lips with mine.
After a while, I step back from the kiss. Slowly, I scan her body.
“You are the hottest thing I’ve ever seen. Fucking beautiful.”
Falling to my knees, I lift one of her legs and place it over my shoulder.
“Ollie.” Her voice shakes with need.
“I got you, babe.”
Spreading her open with two fingers, I find the spot needing attention from my tongue and start working. I slide my other hand up her legs until two fingers enter her. She cries out, and I start to pump my fingers as my tongue licks her greedily, loving every second.
