Dotty Dreads a Disaster

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Dotty Dreads a Disaster Page 5

by Diane Ezzard


  “So long as you don’t tell people you’re coming over to service an old boiler, I don’t mind.” She smiled.

  “Don’t worry, I’d rather grease your nipples than the ones I normally have to work with.”

  Kylie loved the plumbing terms, and the innuendos tickled her. From flushed grollings to jigged olive-spantles, she now knew about ballcocks and frotting pencils.

  “I’ll be sucking the clenching pin tight to the arc thrust.” Kenny smiled.

  “I don’t have a clue what that means, but it sounds sexy. Come here, lover boy.” When Kylie pulled Kenny over the threshold of her front door, they went at it like rabbits, christening every room in the house. The trouble with Kylie, she was an open book. She had no qualms about discussing the finer details of her love life. Until recently, her mum had been getting an education in the Kama Sutra, which had probably pushed the mother-daughter relationship to its limit. Kylie was advised by her friends that some of her sexual exploits should be kept private to save any embarrassment, or at least be for their ears only.

  Tonight, Kylie had worn a black dress with a slit up the side in the moody goth-punk style she so loved. Her black lips and thick black eyeliner added to her style. The only thing out of place was the pink fluffy slippers she wore that matched her newly tinted hair colour.

  Delphinia arrived. As she got out of her dark-blue BMW, she said a little prayer to her spirit god, Jonathan for getting her there in one piece. Winston’s driving was atrocious. It was too fast and erratic. He didn’t take heed of his stopping distances learnt when he passed his theory test four years ago then promptly forgot everything. That was how it seemed to Delphinia. Still, she mustn’t moan too much. The last time she did that, he wouldn’t pick her up. Winston had a wilful side, and he was too old now to change. He took after his wayward dad. Bongo, as his dad was affectionately known, walked out of the family home while Winston was an impressionable teenager. Now he paraded around their neighbourhood on the council estate where they lived in Crawley with his many girlfriends. Bongo had plenty of money, mainly obtained by ill-gotten means. His family never saw a penny of it though. According to the powers that be, he was on benefits and out of work. Surely, even they should be able to see that something didn’t add up. He swanned around in a brand-new Mercedes, much to Winston’s annoyance.

  His dad wasn’t the only reason Winston was moody. It was as though he had been born with a negativity gene and nothing was ever right in Winston’s world. He found fault with everything and everybody. Delphinia learnt over time what pushed her son’s buttons. Today there had been a tension in the air as they drove along. She grabbed hold of the seat when he swung around a corner too rapidly for her liking, but Winston was upset by her reactions. He threw a load of expletives her way and told her she overreacted. Often, that was the case with Delphinia, but not on this occasion. This time, she breathed a sigh of relief when she got out of the car.

  “Do you want me to give you a bell when it’s time to pick me up?”

  Winston didn’t reply. Delphinia nodded. She understood his moods. At times like this, she wished she’d learnt to drive.

  “Pick me up at ten, then.” She smiled at her son who scowled back at her.

  Chapter 10

  “I’ll go first,” Kylie said. She didn’t want Delphinia’s strength sapping after speaking to the other side or whatever she did to foresee the future. The West Indian woman set up her stall in Kylie’s bedroom. It was done out in pink and black, Kylie’s two favourite colours. Even the teddy bear on the bed in between two cerise satin cushions was pink. Delphinia sat on a white rocking chair that normally stayed in the corner with half of Kylie’s wardrobe hanging off it. Kylie perched on the pink fluffy dressing table stool next to her. The walls were covered with black and white photos of different bands most of whom were too obscure for anyone to have heard of.

  Delphinia brought along some incense for effect and she lit it while Kylie sat watching, anticipating what she may be told. Delphinia’s hair, although braided had been tied into a knot that resembled a snake curled up. The burgundy draw-string blouse she wore set off her gold jewellery. Her full skirt came down to mid-calf and was a mustard, orange and burgundy mix with an African style design. Her jewellery jangled, from the gold chains around her neck to the bangles on her hand. She also wore some unusual looking rings. One had the head of a bear; another was in the design of a skull. Her makeup was loud and heavy. Bright eyeshadow and lipstick helped to enhance her protruding eyes and lips, not that they needed any more enhancement.

  She passed a crystal to Kylie and asked her to hold it and think of what she wanted answers to. There was only one question Kylie needed to know, and that was how her love life would turn out. She wasn’t foolish enough to believe there could be any future with Kenny. He had a wife and children and Kylie didn’t want to be labelled a home wrecker, but she was curious to find out how long they would be together.

  She held the crystal, squeezing it in her palm. She closed her eyes and when she opened them Delphinia seemed to be in a trance. The older woman mumbled something. It made Kylie feel nervous, and she wondered if she was okay. Suddenly, Delphinia took the crystal stone back, placed it on the dressing table and took hold of both of Kylie’s hands in hers. She nodded. Kylie hoped she couldn’t read her mind because she was having smutty thoughts about Kenny and some of the things they got up to in that bedroom.

  “You love your freedom, don’t you, darling?” Kylie nodded. “You belong to everyone and yet to no one. No man will tie you down for a long time yet.” Kylie raised her eyebrows. She had a picture of being tied down literally by Kenny. “You’re not looking for a man with money.”

  “Am I not?” Kylie shook her head, bringing herself back into the room.

  “No, you are more impressed with achievements.” Kylie was more impressed with a man’s bedroom prowess which she thought could include achievements.

  “I suppose you are right.”

  “You like to flit around from one relationship to another, don’t you dearie?”

  “Yes, you could say that.” Kylie laughed.

  “Don’t take this the wrong way but… I’m not sure how to put this.” She glanced over at Kylie. “I would say you have an unusual code of ethics. You don’t like to conform.” Kylie laughed a dirty laugh. It didn’t take much detective work to figure that out from Kylie’s short-cropped platinum hair with the long shock of pink hair at the front. “You have many friends. Are you an Aquarius?”

  “Yes, can you tell?” Kylie’s eyes opened wide.

  “I thought so.” Delphinia looked pleased with herself. “You stay friends with your exes, don’t you?”

  “That’s true.” Kylie pictured what happened a week last Saturday. She had sex with Barry, her previous boyfriend, on the snooker table where he worked

  “You’re a social butterfly, adaptable and witty.” Kylie enjoyed listening to the compliments. Delphinia’s eyes narrowed. She put one finger under her mouth and held her chin with her thumb. “Watch that you’re not taken in by someone. You can be naive.”

  “I don’t know about that.” Kylie frowned. She didn’t like being deceived by anyone.

  “You take what people say at face value. Just be careful. You may get into a situation that is too hot to handle.”

  “I think I know what you mean.” Kylie didn’t want to give any clues to Delphinia. If this woman knew she was seeing a married man, she may judge her. Delphinia took hold of Kylie’s hand again and began to stroke the palm with her thumb. For a moment, she thought Delphinia was making a pass at her but then she pointed to the edge of her hand.

  “It doesn’t look like you’ll have any children.” Kylie wasn’t worried about that. It was enough looking after herself. She didn’t have a maternal bone in her body, at least not right now. She was too busy having fun. “I see that you enjoy experimenting with different ways of doing things.” Kylie wasn’t sure where Delphinia was going with this. All
she could think about was her copy of the Kama Sutra that she’d rucked out of sight in the drawer before Delphinia arrived. “Your friends are important to you.” This comment jolted Kylie back into the present. She thought about what she and her friends had previously discussed which was to get Delphinia talking about the murder to see if she came up with anything. “Is there anything you want to ask me?” the West Indian woman said.

  “Have you ever been asked to help in a murder investigation?”

  “Not in this country. I did when I was back home in Antigua. I once helped find the body of a little boy, thanks to a vision I had. The police had their suspicions about his disappearance but couldn’t do anything without a body. I had flashes of the boy in a quarry and that was where they searched. Sadly, they found him dead but by finding his body they could arrest his killer.”

  “Have you had any such occurrences around Nigel Hastings.” Delphinia’s face changed. The sparkle from her eyes disintegrated in a moment.

  “Just the mention of that man’s name leaves a nasty taste in my mouth. This may be a wicked thing to say, Lord have mercy on my soul, but this world is a better place without him in it.” Her words came out as a snarl. Kylie watched Delphinia shudder with disgust.

  “You didn’t like him then?”

  “Like him?” Kylie stared as the rage built up in Delphinia’s face. “I wouldn’t even spit on his grave.”

  “He did a lot for the community. He was involved with many organisations.”

  “That man was a bigot and a bully. He only involved himself because he was controlling and meddlesome and wanted to rule the roost. He upset many people including me.”

  “Do you want to talk about it?”

  “Not here, not now. It wouldn’t be fair on you ladies who are paying good money for my services. Maybe, I will tell you just how evil nasty Nigel was, some other time.”

  “I would be all ears.”

  They finished their session and Kylie went to get the next person in. By the end of the night, the girls seemed suitably impressed with Delphinia, mainly because she had stroked their egos and praised them with compliments. She told Rachel she was a deep, mysterious beauty, magnetic, proud and confident and that her outward persona of being a fragile fluffy kitten was pretence. That was a brave move by Delphinia, but she hit the nail on the head when she said she became controlling once she got her man.

  “You’re the type of woman who looks equally good in anything from a baseball cap to a ball gown, darling. You’re perceptive and you retaliate. I think you’re very good at evening the score. If someone tells you a lie, you will tell them two.” Rachel laughed at this comment. “You can hate with venom yet love with abandon. You’re clever because you let your man think he is the boss, but he’s not, is he, darling?” She winked at Rachel. “You’re very much in charge.” Unwittingly, she gave out her boyfriend’s name and then was astounded when Delphinia mentioned him. “You’re jealous of other women around Harry, aren’t you, darling?” Rachel nodded wondering how this woman knew so much about her. “Did he criticise your cooking recently, and you vowed never to cook for him again?”

  “Yes, that’s amazing.”

  “Make him one of your specialities, darling. You’ve got a good one there. Continue keeping your home sparkling clean the way you do. It’s a credit to you.” Rachel did like to keep her place neat and tidy and was blown away by Delphinia’s comments.

  Dotty was the least receptive of the girls. When Dotty asked her questions about her own home life, Delphinia didn’t seem keen to part any knowledge.

  “I’m here to talk about you, darling and can I tell you, there is a mystic aura around you. I didn’t notice it last time we met but I believe you have a special gift.”

  Dotty raised her eyebrows. She wanted to keep an open mind around what Delphinia had to say but she wasn’t convinced by her. To Dotty, this was a bit of a laugh. “If you tune into your spiritual side more, you will see beyond your simple existence and be able to interpret the movements of the universe.”

  “Is that what happened for you?”

  “Not really, I received the gift as a child. My dreams came true. It frightened me at first, but I soon realised I was special and different.” Dotty wished her dreams would come true and she would meet a man who would love her. She didn’t want to focus on the strengths of her astral-spiritual connections, as Delphina suggested.

  “I’ve been anxious since I found Nigel’s body at the Spring Fair. Because of that, I feel compelled to do all I can to find his killer.”

  “I see your soul is troubled and I may be able to help with that. I wouldn’t get involved in looking for the killer if I were you. It will only make you more stressed.” She smiled. “If you want to book in for a private session, we could do some work around channelling your spiritual energies and getting more of a metaphysical balance.” Dotty didn’t have a clue what Delphinia was talking about, and she thought the woman was just out to make a fast buck.

  “I’ll think about it.”

  At the end of the evening, Delphinia packed her things away when her son came to pick her up. Everyone heard the car outside making a racket, sounding its horn. Delphinia got flustered.

  “Oh, I can’t be late for Winston. He’ll have a right paddy.” The horn blasted repeatedly outside. “That’ll be him now.” Her hands jerked and her movements shook as she pulled her shawl around her shoulders. “I better go, he gets cross if I leave him waiting.” The way the horn continued to blast Winston was not a patient man. “Oh, isn’t he annoying?” Kylie raised her eyebrows and nodded. They thanked Delphinia who couldn’t wait to get out of the house.

  Chapter 11

  The four girls stayed behind to compare notes on their readings. Dotty was the least impressed of the group. She still had suspicions that Delphinia may be a charlatan, as Nigel suggested. There were a few sentiments that rung true. She hit on the fact that Dotty was a fantasist. Dotty had to agree she loved daydreaming. It took her away from the pressures of life. She also mentioned that Dotty got bored with routine. Often, her chores wouldn’t get done because she was too busy planning her next great escapade. None of them ever came to fruition but then climbing Mount Everest and white water rafting down the Zambezi were rather extreme goals. In reality, she was unlikely to get further than a day out in Brighton. Thinking of which, she had a big fair in Brighton this weekend selling her chocolates. Thankfully, Kylie had offered to help again. It was so much easier when two of them attended. Putting the gazebo up on her own was a struggle. There were usually one or two able-bodied men to come to her assistance, but Dotty liked to do things for herself. Kylie was just the opposite. If there was a man about, Kylie turned into a helpless kitten.

  “Delphinia doesn’t think I’ll end up with Kenny,” Kylie said, munching on a sausage roll that was left.

  “You can’t be surprised about that.” Rachel shook her head. “Do you think she researches us before she gets here?”

  “Don’t be so cynical, Rachel. Can’t you just trust her powers.” Kylie swigged the bottom of her glass of Prosecco.

  “She asked me if I had an auntie Flo.”

  “What did you say?” Kylie’s interest perked up.

  “I told her you had one.”

  “It’s probably because we are so close that she thought it was your auntie.” Kylie put an arm around her friend. “Did she say anything about her?”

  “She hinted that she may be in some sort of trouble.” The girls looked at each other with eyes open wide. That was the nearest they got to Delphinia providing any useful information in finding out who killed nasty Nigel.

  Although Kylie didn’t suspect her auntie Flo, she couldn’t get away from the fact that she had both the opportunity to pop poisonous mushrooms in the broth and the motive. There was a long-running saga between Nigel and Flo. This wasn’t the first year that he had disqualified her entry. They had history between them going back years. It started when a cake Flo made for the
fair collapsed. She blamed the judges for prodding her cake unnecessarily and causing it to demolish. It was supposed to be a replica of Arundel Castle and Flo had been very proud of her accomplishment. She demanded compensation and when none was forthcoming, she went to the papers about it. A photographer from the Observer had been at the fair at the time, so had snapped the caved-in castle. The newspaper printed a picture of Flo with the headline “Arundel Castle demolished.” That edition sold four times as many copies as usual as everyone thought it was the real-life castle that had been destroyed. The judges and Nigel, in particular, were inundated with cruel comments. The trolls punished them on social media with their cutting remarks and Flo became a local hero, if only for a day. Since that incident, she believed the judges tried their utmost to find fault with any of her entries to the point where it felt like a personal vendetta against her. So, when her cauliflower and asparagus were disqualified this year, it could have been the last straw for Flo.

  “Whoever murdered Nigel knew their mushrooms. They knew what they were doing. Most people wouldn’t have a clue which were the poisonous varieties.” Kylie was still eating leftovers.

  “I suppose whoever did it could have found the information online,” Dotty said.

  “True, and in which case we will probably never know, but there is also the possibility that someone took a book out of the library to study the varieties. It is worth checking to see if the library stock any books relating to mushrooms and if they can provide us with information about the lenders.” Kylie helped herself to a handful of crisps that were left in a dish on the table.

  “Good thinking, Kylie. It’s worth a try.” Dotty’s expression was serious.

  “I’ll get onto it tomorrow.”

 

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