Vanessa opened the door to her hotel room, and I got a surprise of my own.
“Wow,” I stuttered. “You’re—” I was speechless. I’d forgotten the word I needed.
“Blonde?” she offered.
I nodded. “Blonde.” That was the word I was looking for.
Vanessa grinned at my expression. “Do you like it?”
I nodded. “Yeah, I do.” Her previously auburn hair was now a shining, golden blonde. It suited her. “You did it yourself? I’m impressed.”
“I figured it wouldn’t hurt if I were a bit harder to identify from a distance,” she said, flipping her new hair over her shoulder.
She smiled at me, obviously having just taken a shower because her hair was also somewhat damp. She looked fresh and clean in her pink pajamas, but also tired. She also looked surprised. Still, she seemed pleased to see me, so it wasn’t all bad news.
“You’re not my hamburger,” she said after a moment. I realized we were just staring at each other.
I cocked an eyebrow at her. “Sorry to disappoint.” I was definitely not her hamburger. Although, I thought to myself as I took in her cute little outfit, if she has a different type of hunger, I’d be more than happy to satisfy it.
“I’m not disappointed to see you, Ian.” She looked up at me in a way that filled me with a nameless excitement. Having a beautiful woman not be disappointed in me was more than enough to lift my spirits for the evening. Still, I was going to press my luck.
“I got us tickets to a baseball game tonight. What do you think?” I asked her, “Want to go watch some baseball with me?”
Her smile widened. “You’re trying to cheer me up, aren’t you?”
I nodded. “Is it that obvious?” Her expression indicated that it was. “The paparazzi will be there,” I added. “I had Ryan tip them off. Maybe we can kiss on the big screen.”
Vanessa looked at the tickets in my hand. I saw her moment of indecision rise, linger, and then pass. She shook her head. “I’m not sure I’m up to it, to be honest.”
My heart sank. “Oh.”
“Would you maybe rather just stay in instead and order room service with me?” she suggested. “We can watch pay-per-view or Netflix or something?”
Or something?
My disappointment vanished. Was this… Netflix and chill? I hoped so. I really, really hoped so. I felt myself nodding eagerly and Vanessa stepped aside to let me into her hotel room.
“Did you really order a hamburger?” I asked.
She nodded. “Well, a veggie burger.”
“You’re a vegetarian?” I honestly hadn’t noticed her eating habits. I’d been too busy being hypnotized by her in general.
“Mostly.” She cocked her head at me. “Your fan club page says you’re a vegan. Is that true?”
I felt a smile tugging at my lips. “You’ve been to my fan club page?” I hadn’t even been to my fan club page.
She flushed. “Maybe. By accident, of course.”
“Oh, of course.” I couldn’t even express how much it delighted me that she’d looked me up, but it clearly embarrassed her, so I just nodded and answered her question. “Yeah. I gave up animal products along with all the other bad stuff I was putting in my body. I figured it was better to go all the way. It was meant to be a temporary detox thing, but I got accustomed to it. Now I don’t enjoy meat anymore, although I have to say I do miss cheese sometimes. Especially cheesecake…”
I was rambling. I shut up.
Inside Vanessa’s hotel room, my heart had started pounding. Clearly Don hadn’t booked Vanessa a suite like he had for me. There was just a bed, a table, and a bathroom. It felt very small with the two of us inside with the door shut. Cozy. Intimate…
“So,” I said awkwardly, “should I—”
Vanessa cut me off with a kiss. I didn’t need any hints after that. I knew what she wanted, and I wanted it, too. It was clearly time to cut the small talk.
I grabbed her by the hips, steering her back against a wall. She tasted clean and minty, and she smelled like lavender and violets. Her hands twined through the hair around my ears and she sighed into my ear when I moved down to kiss the long, white length of her neck. This was already better than the roller rink. I could take as long as I wanted.
Her soft little pink pajamas were both sexy and adorable. They were thin, lacey, and short enough to show off Vanessa’s long, long legs. Her hard nipples pushed at the fabric of the top. I set about unbuttoning it immediately.
She pushed us off the wall and I found the back of my knees against the bed. I sat down and pulled her onto my lap. She straddled me and smiled. Her thighs felt like silk under my fingertips.
Vanessa shrugged out of her top and my breath caught in my throat. She was so beautiful that it never ceased to amaze me. It was no wonder scores of envious women were spending their free time tearing her down. Petty, jealous women probably do so with no ammunition whatsoever just from looking at her. She had the figure every woman wished she had, round where she should be rounded and narrow at the waist. Having Vanessa in my arms was like a feast after a famine. I didn’t even know where to start. So, I started from the top and worked my way down.
I lavished attention on her chest, playing with her soft curves and enjoying her little noises of encouragement and pleasure. She whimpered and stared down into my eyes as I kissed her pale pink nipples into hard, rose-colored points. I drew my fingers through her soft, damp hair, her soft, pale back, and her round, perfect ass. I explored just how excited I could make her this way and was rewarded at every stage with her eager kisses and smiling mouth.
Her hips rocked forward against my growing erection, and the pressure and heat of her was getting to me. Eventually neither one of us could stand it any longer. I leaned us back into the bed and positioned her beneath me, pulling off my own shirt as efficiently as I could. She pulled down her little shorts. I thanked my lucky stars I’d worn sneakers I could kick off instead of boots. Because unlacing anything would have been impossible in my current, lust-addled state.
This time we were not in a gross alley. Nor was anyone was going to get elbowed in the face. It was just me and her, alone and uninterrupted. We’d finally have an opportunity to get this right and take our time. I was unwrapping the condom and preparing to take off my pants as she watched me with half-closed eyes and the world’s sexiest smile.
“Room service!” An accented voice said cheerfully from the hallway. A fist banged decisively on the door. “I have your dinner, ma’am!”
Damn.
28
Vanessa
The arrival of the food killed the mood and sent us both scrambling. I hustled to get my clothes back on while Ian, who was at least closer to being presentable, answered the door. When the door swung shut a moment later, all we could do was laugh at ourselves.
“I guess we should have anticipated that,” I told Ian, re-buttoning my shirt and feeling more than a bit foolish. “I did order it. Do you want to split the burger with me?” It was bigger than I could possibly eat anyway. I’m not sure what I expected when I ordered the ‘giant veggie burger.’ Not something this huge, that was for sure.
He sat down on the bed and accepted the plate. “Sure.”
I switched on the TV to something innocuous about puppies and we ate in relative silence for a moment. I was starting to wonder if Ian was unhappy until he slipped and arm around me and kissed the top of my head. I melted against him.
“I told you we should have gone to the baseball game,” he teased.
“I don’t think I’ve ever actually seen a baseball game,” I confessed. “I don’t even know the rules. I know they try to hit the ball and they’ve got three chances to do it. Then there’s running.”
Ian laughed and because I was against his chest, it reverberated through my body in a way that comforted me in a way I hadn’t realized I was missing. It felt so good to be held by someone.
“You’ve got it. They try to hit the
ball,” he replied. “That’s basically all you need to know. A baseball game is actually pretty sedate and relaxed. You spend a lot more of your time talking and hanging out than you do watching the game. It’s America’s pastime.”
“Are you implying that sitting in bed, eating a burger, and watching TV is a less patriotic way to spend the evening?” I asked.
He smiled. “Actually, that does sound pretty American, doesn’t it?”
“It definitely does.” I sighed. “I appreciate you coming to cheer me up. I just don’t know if it’s doable today.”
“What happened?” he asked. “Do you want to talk about it?”
Ordinarily, I’d shrug it off. I was never a big feeling-sharer. It wasn’t my strong suit. I was much better at making snippy comments and pretending that nothing bothered me than acknowledging when something had made me sad or angry. I’d been working on it with my therapist. She called it an unhealthy coping mechanism.
The truth all just sort of spilled out of me all at once. “The friend I wanted to see flaked out on me. But what’s worse, she didn’t even really want to see me. She was just pretending to be excited to see me to get close to the band. When I told her that I couldn’t give her what she wanted, she got really mean.”
Ian frowned. “I’m sorry.”
“I thought she wanted to see me.” I sighed. “I guess that was stupid.”
“It’s not.” He shook his head. “Trust me, when you get famous, you find out that a lot of the people you thought were your friends never were. There are a surprisingly large number of people out there that only want people for what they can do for them. It’s really pretty disheartening.”
“I’ll say.”
Ian was staring down at his hands with a bleak expression on his face, and I could only imagine how many times he’d been in a similar situation to the one I was in with Gemma. He’d told me on our roller rink date that he didn’t have many friends. I could guess that this was probably why. It was a miracle he trusted anyone if this is what his life was like. It was a miracle he trusted me at all, since I was basically a stranger to him.
I thought about my relationship with Gemma during college and wondered if I’d somehow missed the signs. I couldn’t think of anything. She and I weren’t super close friends or anything, but we got along well and had similar interests. We’d met in a film appreciation class and sort of hit it off. We’d go shopping together and partying, but even though we weren’t best friends, I thought I knew her. At least, I thought I knew she wasn’t the type of person who was only looking for what I could do for her. We’d stayed in touch during the four years since graduation, but I guess four years is a long time. Something must have changed.
“One time when we were in college,” I told Ian, “Gemma drove me across town to the only pharmacy that was open when I needed to fill a prescription. I thought she was better than this.” I’d had the stomach flu and couldn’t drive myself. Gemma had been there to help me when I needed it, and I’d been so grateful. “I trusted her. I thought I could depend on her.”
“At least now you know not to.” His voice was soothing, and I soaked up his warmth.
“Somehow knowing that doesn’t make me feel better.”
He held me tighter. “Does this make you feel better?”
Sex would probably make me feel even better, at least temporarily. But now that I was thinking again, I didn’t feel up to it. I wished the kitchen had taken a bit longer with the food, although it was good that I was eating. I hadn’t had enough to eat today, and it was probably contributing to my terrible mood. And my impulsivity.
I cuddled closer to Ian and was rewarded with a little surprised noise and a laugh. “Yeah,” I admitted. “I think it is making me feel better.”
29
Ian
It took a little over ten hours to get from Miami to Atlanta. It didn’t feel as long though, because Vanessa spent most of it sitting next to me on the bus and holding my hand. We hadn’t had sex during our two nights in Miami, but I was starting to realize that going slow was key to getting Vanessa to trust me.
The rest of the band noticed the change and likely assumed we were sleeping together but were wise enough not to say anything to either of us. I got a lot of knowing looks (and a double thumbs up from Don), and I ignored them all. My relationship with Vanessa was nobody’s business but ours.
The show in Atlanta was not until the next day, thankfully. Ryan had set up an additional ‘public appearance’ for us, since Vanessa was still getting quite a bit of hate from the internet. At least no one else had sent her any carrion. Vanessa lit up when I told her we were going to the zoo, but I couldn’t take credit. Having my brother plan dates for me was a bit unconventional, but I’d still take what I could get. He’d even arranged for Wendy and Jason to come with us with Lachlan. That way the pictures would prove we were one big, happy family and definitely not being ripped apart by infidelity. The only downside to going anywhere with Wendy and Lachlan was that Jason insisted that we also bring his two hulking security guards, Elton and John (yes, those really were their names). The six of us made quite the group.
“Giant pandas or elephants?” Vanessa asked us, pointing to the sign up ahead where the path branched. She was holding my hand. “Which way should we go?”
Wendy shrugged.
“Pandas,” Jason replied. “Definitely pandas. Elephants can wait.”
I agreed with Jason. I found elephants unsettling. Too smart. Anything that big and that intelligent shouldn’t be in a zoo in the first place. In fact, I had fairly strong feelings about zoos on principle. They seemed cruel. But Vanessa was happy and the animals looked healthy and happy, so maybe I was wrong. Oblivious to my concerns about animal cruelty, Vanessa shrugged, clearly happy either way. The four of us headed left toward the panda enclosure down the wide, gravel pathway.
The zoo was busy on the sunny Saturday. We clearly weren’t the only people who thought this would be a nice way to spend the afternoon. The vibe was very different than Bourbon Street, but due to the presence of so many children (and animals), no less noisy and excited. I knew that somewhere people were watching us, but I couldn’t see them. I could almost believe we were alone, just enjoying a day at the zoo with the other happy people. However, as we approached the panda enclosure, the mood shifted. By the time we were going inside, it seemed weirdly subdued.
“I’ll explain later,” a mother said to her son, who looked to be about eight years old. “I promise the lady panda is okay.” He was crying.
Maybe we should have picked the elephants?
Another parent marched by with her toddler in her arms. She was covering his eyes and red in the face.
Vanessa and I exchanged a concerned glance. Were the pandas hurt? I wasn’t sure I wanted to see that. We passed by another group that was laughing uproariously, so I hoped I was mistaken.
The pandas were kept in an indoor enclosure, probably a good thing since Atlanta’s climate is a lot fucking hotter than the Chinese cloud forests. I doubted that they’d enjoy the ninety-degree heat and high humidity, and I was glad to see that the zoo didn’t make them tough it out. Hell, I was glad to feel the air conditioning when we went inside. My relief didn’t last long.
We realized almost immediately what all the fuss was about.
There, in the middle of the panda enclosure, right in front of God and everybody, a pair of giant pandas were making sweet, sweet panda love. Enthusiastically. The zookeepers were watching, and laughing, from the edge of the enclosure. Nearby, one of the tour guides was attempting to explain to a group of girl scouts who were watching curiously.
“Well, it looks like Yang Yang, the boy panda, has decided to mate with Lun Lun, the girl panda.” He was red in the face and looked like he wanted to be literally anywhere else than explaining about boning pandas to a bunch of little girls. It was probably an occupational hazard. “I know that the zookeepers were hoping they’d hit it off,” he continued, “and well,
apparently they have.”
One of the little girls raised her camera to take a picture and I just about lost it laughing. Was there a merit badge for this? In the girl’s defense, it was hard to look away. There was something weirdly hypnotic about the humping pandas.
“Huh,” I heard myself saying. “Well, that’s not something you see every day.”
Vanessa giggled. “Oh my.” She pulled out her phone and started filming it, too. Wendy and Jason looked very relieved that Lachlan was too young to realize what was going on. He was more interested in a penny he found on the ground than the pandas. They better enjoy it while it lasts, I thought to myself. Live giant panda sex would have been extremely interesting to me when I was a kid. Hell, it was pretty interesting to me as an adult.
“She doesn’t really look very into it,” I remarked. The female was just kind of standing there, chewing bamboo and looking bored.
“That’s because that’s not Lun Lun,” one of the zookeepers said to us, speaking in a low enough voice that the girl scouts and their tour guide couldn’t hear it. “That there is Ming, one of our male pandas.”
Well then.
Vanessa giggled again and Jason guffawed.
“Does Yang Yang there know he’s getting it on with another male?” Jason asked.
The zookeeper shrugged. “Probably. They have a pretty good sense of smell, but they aren’t very intelligent, so he may not understand that it won’t have the desired result.” He sighed. “Honestly, we consider this a success either way. It’s a step forward. Now we just need to get him to do this with Lun Lun.” Then he frowned. “Unless this is just what he’s into. That happens sometimes, too. Then there’s not much we can do.”
This One’s For You Page 12
