by Linda Kage
He turned slowly and examined Amanda’s face. She looked truly happy for their dad. Not wanting to show his hurt feelings, he agreed. "Yeah … She’s nice."
But why hadn’t his dad invited him to their wedding? Why hadn’t he even bothered to introduce her to his son first?
Mandy hugged him. "I’m glad he finally found someone."
Drew could only keep nodding in agreement, totally alone in his irrational envy and heartache.
"I’m not scared," he repeated to his sister now. "Just nervous. I want to do a good job on Evie’s pictures."
As if realizing this was the perfect time for her entrance, his seventeen-year old stepsister hurried from the house, charging straight toward them.
"Drew!" she exclaimed, throwing herself at him and hugging him heartily. "You’re here."
Having never been hugged by her before, he lifted his arms in surprise. "Uh … yeah."
"She’s not excited or anything," his father’s voice told him.
Drew lifted his face to find Don Harper smiling at his stepdaughter. Returning the grin, Drew murmured, "I can tell."
As Evie pulled away from him, Don tugged her close to his side and wrapped a companionable arm around her shoulder. "You sure you’re ready for this?" he asked Drew.
Drew patted the camera bag resting on his hip. "I guess so."
"Let’s start in the gazebo," Evie said, already pulling away from Don and hurrying around the back of the house.
Helpless to follow her order, the three adults followed. All the while, Drew made sure his sister stuck close.
•
By six o’clock that evening, all the pictures had been taken, yet Drew found himself still standing in his father’s backyard, holding a Styrofoam plate smeared with leftover traces of a grilled hamburger and potato salad. He still wasn’t sure how his father’s wife had talked them into staying for a cookout, but here he stood, still plastered close to Mandy’s side.
"Now that we’ve finally found a private moment," she murmured, stepping close to speak in a conspiratorially low voice.
They stood on the opposite side of the yard as her and Candace’s children, who were playing tag. Don and Candace had just carried leftovers inside.
"She’s a hair stylist," Amanda said, not looking at Drew as she spoke but keeping her eyes on Natalie, Lucy, and Felix.
He blinked, totally confused. "What? Who is?"
"Piper Holliday." Her lip curled with contempt as the name hissed its way from her lips. "I googled her. She works at Styles R Us." Her blue eyes turbulent like the ocean just before a hurricane, she added, "That’s where Jeffrey gets his hair cut."
Drew swallowed, trying to focus. But at the mention of Mia’s roommate, her face popped into his mind. He’d be old and gray before he forgot the first moment she turned from watering her flowers and met his gaze. His heart palpitated just thinking about it.
But, no, they weren’t talking about Mia. The roommate, he reminded himself. Focus on the roommate.
"She cuts his hair?" he asked his sister.
Amanda bit her lip. "I don’t think so. His hairdresser’s name is Darla. But at least this explains how they met."
He nodded and didn’t plan on asking, "Does Mia work there too?" but the words spilled from his mouth before he could check them.
His sister nailed him with a perturbed look, her eyes narrowed and lips pressed flat with disapproval. "How should I know? I don’t care about her."
He cleared his throat and glanced away. "So … what? You didn’t google Mia when you thought she was dating Jeff."
Sighing as if his question was the stupidest thing she’d ever been asked, Amanda said, "I didn’t know Mia’s last name."
Right. Come to think of it, he didn’t know Mia’s last name either.
"I didn’t discover much else about her," Amanda continued, returning to the Piper subject. "But I found some newspaper article online about her graduating high school eight years ago."
That would make her what … twenty-six, twenty-seven. He wondered if she was the same age as Mia. Mia certainly looked younger. She had such a fresh, smooth face. But there’d been something ancient in her eyes, like something had prematurely aged her. He wondered what could’ve been so awful as to wear her down like that.
"Think you can coax any information out of the roommate. Out of this Mia woman," Amanda said. "Since you’re so in love with her."
He lifted his face as the mention of Mia. "Mandy," he started.
"You can act interested in her while spying on her worthless roommate."
He frowned. Act interested? There would be no acting involved.
"She’d probably go out with you," Mandy continued. "I mean, she came to your house to give you addresses for houses for sale. That right there says she’s interested."
"You think?" he couldn’t help but ask. His sister scowled at the hopeful note in his voice. He cleared his throat, needing to redirect the attention from Mia. "You know what. I’m not doing it. You need to talk to your husband, Mandy. I refuse to use Mia like that."
She opened her mouth to comment, but a female voice called from behind him. "What’re you two gossiping about over here by yourselves?"
Drew looked up to find both Candace and his father approaching. Candace smiled—as she usually did. His dad didn’t look so pleased. But he was the type that would follow his second wife into the grave if he had to … which, by the expression on his face, looked to be the case.
"Mind if we join you?" Candace asked.
"Not at all," Amanda answered, making Drew question which woman perfected the cheerful act better.
It made him wonder how many times his sister had grinned at him, when in fact she was probably sobbing inside. He studied her while she and Candace exchanged pleasantries, talking about motherhood. She didn’t look at all like the woman he’d been talking to thirty seconds earlier, like she might burst into tears any moment.
"So, Drew …" His father sidled up to him and shoved his hands into his pockets, jingling the change inside. "Evie seems real pleased with her poses."
Drew had to fight to keep from rolling his eyes. He doubted his father could’ve come up with a lamer topic to discuss. "We’ll have to wait ‘til the proofs are done before knowing if she’s going to like them or not," he answered. It was probably a rude thing to say, but he’d been unable to stop himself.
"Oh, I’m sure she’ll love them," Candace spoke up, dropping her conversation with Amanda to break into the men’s discussion to keep the tone polite, no doubt.
"You have no idea how grateful we are to you, Drew. Evie’s been talking about nothing else but getting these pictures all year."
Drew forced a smile, thinking they shouldn’t have to be grateful. He was family. Taking all the pictures around here should’ve been expected of him. But, no, everyone was so polite and so frustratingly distant.
"Felix!" Amanda yelled from beside him, making him jump. "Stop hitting Jack."
The six youngsters continued to play tag across the yard as if they hadn’t heard her. Down from Evie at seventeen to Felix at four, they all laughed and darted away from Lucy who was obviously "it."
"Oh, they’re fine. They get along so well together," Candace said, sounding pleased. When she turned back, she paused dramatically to stare between Mandy and Don. "You know, I think it’s amazing the similarities between you and your dad, Amanda."
Drew frowned and eyed his stepmother. Just what kind of similarities was she talking about? Drew was the one who’d ended up looking like a replica of his father.
But then Candace continued. "You both have two girls and a boy. Natalie, Lucy, and Felix pair off so nicely with Evie, Jack, and Bri."
Jaw dropping, Drew glanced toward Amanda. She gave a slight shake of her head, warning him to keep his mouth shut. But the indignation burned its way down his throat and he ached to say something.
Candace never purposely left him and Amanda out of the family, but it was always t
he little things she did that let him know he was an outsider. Without fail, she always forgot to set him a place when Amanda drug him along for Christmas. And now … saying Don Harper only had three children … Evie, Jack, and Brianna. Guess that left Drew an orphan now. Abandoned by his mother and thrown over by his father for some other woman’s kids.
His dad must’ve sensed the tension rolling off Drew, because he completely changed the subject, glancing at Amanda and asking, "How’s Jeff doing these days?"
Amanda and Drew exchanged a quick look. He half hoped she’d open up and confess her suspicions. His dad would understand all about having a faithless spouse. Drew couldn’t remember how many times his mother had cheated before she’d finally run off with some used car salesman.
But Amanda kept her problems to herself and smiled graciously. "He’s just fine. Been going on a lot of business trips lately. But I say that’s a good thing. Must mean a promotion is coming up."
As Candace and Don chuckled, Drew met Mandy’s gaze. Jeff had been gone a lot? Why had he not known this? Guilt smacked him across the face. How long had his sister held suspicions about her husband’s faithfulness? How long had she kept it inside without anyone else knowing? And would she still be keeping it all in now if Drew hadn’t caught her marching from her house with a gun?
"We should probably be going soon," Amanda said, stepping closer to him.
He lifted his face, wondering how long he’d been spacing out and how much of the conversation he’d missed.
"Well, we’re glad to spend so much time with you today," Candace said. She patted his shoulder. "And Drew. We can’t thank you enough for Evie’s pictures."
He nodded, once again the outsider. "No problem."
As his dad took Candace’s hand and called a goodbye to his three grandchildren, Drew caught Amanda’s arm and drew her to the side. She looked up at him in surprise.
There was nothing like a fresh reminder why he was so grateful to her.
"Okay," he relented. "I’ll talk to Mia and see what I can find out from her. Just … give me a few days to decide how I’m going to do this. All right?"
•
The nightmare that struck came to her in wicked Technicolor. It was so vivid, she could still smell Ryan’s aftershave as he tried to push her away.
"Ryan." she clutched his arm desperately. "Please don’t do this. Don’t go. You have to be strong for me."
But he only worked more vigorously to pry her off him. She didn’t like the clingy Mia much either, but she didn’t care about how pathetic she must look. She needed his support.
Finally shrugging her away, he stepped back and shook his head. "And who’s going to be strong for me, Mia?" he wanted to know. "I lost a child too."
She gasped, sitting straight up in bed. Sweat had matted the back of her hair to her neck. She shuddered out a trembling breath and lifted her hand to her neck to feel her erratic pulse. Shaking her head, she shoved away the covers and stumbled off the mattress to hurry into her bathroom. Once the light was on and she started the faucet, she lifted her face to the vanity mirror. Large grey eyes stared back, looking frightened and alone.
"You’re so pathetic," she told the image, cupping her hand under the stream and splashing water onto her cheeks.
Once she’d dried her face and changed into something that wasn’t drenched in sweat, she crawled back between her warm sheets and closed her eyes. Wanting to see anything on the insides of her eyelids besides Ryan shoving her away, she concentrated on breathing. One breath in and one breath out.
Avoiding the beach scene, she focused on her past, looking for a happy memory instead. Lexie’s face appeared in her head and she smiled instantly. But as soon as the precious little girl giggled her precious little baby laugh, awful memories followed and she sobbed out a moan.
It wasn’t fair. She should be able to recall her baby without bawling. She wanted those happy memories back. She needed them like she needed air.
But it wasn’t to be. Unconcerned about the guilt that would no doubt follow, she pictured Drew instead. Back in swimming trunks, he set his pale mixed drink aside and leaned toward her once again. She smiled, latching onto the image. He had such kind eyes, a safe and protective smile. She could languish in his company and never once fear anything. He seemed like the easy-going type that wouldn’t mind a clinger if something awful happened. He’d cuddle her, and unlike Ryan, would give any kind of support she craved.
He’d probably be a good daddy too. She remembered how he’d touched that baby’s head in his studio. So caring and gentle. A reflection of Lexie wavered through her consciousness, learning to walk from Mia’s arms. She imagined Drew catching her after three wobbly steps. He scooped her up into his arms and kissed her face until his beard stubble tickled her and made her wrinkle her nose.
Holding her close, he glanced toward Mia, and they shared a smile. "She’s growing so fast."
Mia nodded. "Pretty soon, she’ll be taking her first step down the wedding aisle."
Pulling Lexie close, Drew frowned and kissed her baby-fine hair. "No way. Not my little girl. I’m the only man for her. Right, Princess?"
Mia fell unconscious to that scene. Drew, who’d never even met her daughter, twirled Lexie—who’d never lived long enough to even take one step—in a circle. When he lifted Dream-Lexie up high, she screamed with giggles, begging him for more. Drifting into deep REM, Mia slept with a smile.
Chapter Eight
Mia sat at her computer, in her bedroom, shopping eBay for Piper’s birthday. She’d just placed her bid for a Louis Vuitton purse her roommate would die for when the doorbell rang. Clicking on confirm bid, she clicked back into another screen to see if she was high bidder.
"No," she muttered, digging her teeth into her bottom lip.
The doorbell chimed again before she remembered Piper was gone, working out at the gym this afternoon. Brushing her fingers over her mouth and down the front of her shirt to ensure there was no more evidence left of the Oreos she’d delved into half an hour earlier, she stood and hurried to the entrance.
She pulled the main door open before checking who’d come to visit. And suddenly, there stood Drew, waiting on the other side of her screen door, hands shoved deep into his pockets and facing the street as he watched a handful of children purchase ice cream from a traveling vendor.
He turned when she opened the door. Their gazes met and caught; she forgot to breathe.
"Hi," he said, sounding a little oxygen-deprived.
Not sure how to react, she stood there. A million responses burst through her. She could slam the door in his face, tell him he was a lying jerk … or she could open the screen and pull him into a grateful hug.
It felt so good to see him again. After dreaming about him with Lexie, he looked exactly like the vision she’d created. Even his smile was the same … though he hadn’t had that uncertain, apologetic look in his eyes last night when he’d pulled Lexie into his arms.
"You probably don’t believe me," he started. "But I actually came over here last time to apologize for the scene at my studio. But now that I think of it, I never did tell you how sorry I was, did I?" He winced and finished, "I only upset you more."
Mia didn’t answer. She merely stared at him.
He shifted weight from foot to foot. "Do you want me to apologize out here?" When she still refused to respond, he nodded and sent her a stiff smile. "Okay," he said. "That’s fine."
He blew out a breath and glanced up at the sky as if silently scanning his brain, trying to remember what he’d rehearsed to say. "Okay," he repeated. "I am sincerely sorry for misleading you the first time we met. I hope you realize I didn’t mean it for spite. Never for that. I did have a reason. And I never, ever meant to deceive or hurt you."
"I’m not hurt." She folded her arms over her chest to rub at her suddenly chilled arms.
No, she wasn’t hurt. She was devastated.
"Oh." He looked at her askance as if he didn’t beli
eve her, but he didn’t call her on it. Instead, he sucked in a breath and said, "Good. That’s good. I’d also like to apologize for disrespecting your wishes and reading the card that came with the roses."
He paused, giving her a chance to respond. She lifted an eyebrow, letting him know she needed more groveling. His lips tightened, repressing his amusement.
Glancing away, he continued. "I know you’re mad. But I did what I felt I had to do."
At her sharp frown, he quickly explained, "Mandy’s more than just a sister to me. See, my mom left when I was little. But it didn’t really faze me because … well, there was always Amanda. My sister pretty much raised me. She stepped into the slot of mother without even blinking, even though she was still in high school. I remember she had to quit the volleyball team so she could stay home with me every night."
Not sure if he was feeding her some sob story—whether it was the truth or a lie—to gain her sympathies so he could sneak some Piper information from her, she studied him a moment before curiosity caught the better of her.
"What about your dad? Where was he?"
He glanced down at his shoes. "He had to find a second job. We rarely saw him. Amanda was the one that kept our family together. I know it had to be hard for her. I certainly never made it any easier. I was a typical kid, always managing to get myself into trouble."
"I wonder why I believe that part of your story?" she murmured.
He grinned, and she bit the inside of her lip in self-reprimand for letting him think he was softening her up. He wasn’t … not really. It was kind of sad about his mom, yeah. She would’ve freaked if her mother had left. But she wasn’t going to give into those cute puppy dog eyes. No way.
"I bet you only believe me because I still find myself getting into trouble around you?"
She scowled; his smile fell.
Clearing his throat, he continued. "Anyway, my dad remarried my freshman year of college. I remember coming home for Christmas break and my room being … gone. He’d married a woman with two children." Meeting her gaze with a look she couldn’t read, he added a side note. "The oldest starts college in a year. I took her senior picture yesterday." Glancing off again, he returned to his main story. "Mandy had already married Jeff and was pregnant with her firstborn at this point. But she set up a room for me, and I spent Christmas with her."
