by Chiah Wilder
“You doing okay?” At Tank’s gruff voice, her eyes snapped open and found him standing in front of her. “You look like you’re somewhere far away.”
“You could say that,” she replied.
She studied him. His shirt was unbuttoned down to his chest, his white undershirt peeking through and highlighting his chiseled torso.
Running her fingers through her tangled hair, she smiled at him. “It looks like you may have found a bit of fun while I was hard at work.”
“Nothing more than relaxing and listening to the waves.”
“Relaxed looks good on you.”
He stared at her intently. “And working hard looks damn sexy on you.” His voice pitched a bit lower, tickling the base of her spine.
Impulsively, she took a step forward, and so did he, until the heat of his body could be felt against her clothes. With less than an inch between them, she determined he was even more lethal up close. His face was clean-shaven. His eyes beneath the moonlight shimmered with an intensity that made her skin pebble. Wanting to take a step back, she hesitated, unsure if her body remembered how to move.
Tank’s lips tipped into a slow, easy smile. He skimmed his fingers down her arms and claimed her hand, causing her to shiver. “Are you cold? I can help you with that…”
The promise trailed out into the sexually charged air between them. A million ways Tank could keep her warm played at the forefront of her mind in an erotic loop. Everything faded away except for the rush of the waves, the twinkling lights in the trees, and the honeyed scent of evening primrose.
“I’m not cold, but I’m sure you could help me with a lot of things,” she breathed, unable to look away.
Her throat tightened as arousal twisted low in her belly. Half of her was hoping he’d make a move, while the other half wanted to push him away. But when he inched closer, her body responded like a magnet, fusing to his as one of his powerful arms snaked around her lower back, making her intimately aware of every muscle beneath that tight undershirt.
“Yeah, I could,” he murmured against her lips. “You’re so beautiful. I couldn’t keep my eyes off you tonight,” he whispered before covering her mouth with his.
Looping her arms around his neck, she drew him closer, falling into the searing kiss. His tongue glided along hers in a tantalizing dance, stoking the fire.
Fisting her hair at the nape of her neck, he pulled her head back, hard, and thrust his tongue even deeper into her mouth. Arching against him, she moaned when he broke the kiss and trailed his lips along her jawline, licking his way down her neck when she tipped her head back.
“I like that,” he groaned.
The light scraping of his teeth against her tender skin made her nerves snap with desire.
“So soft.” Nibbling on her lobe, he ran the tip of his tongue along the length of her neck
while tracing the skin behind her ear with the end of his finger.
He claimed her mouth feverishly once more, causing her knees to tremble. There was nothing else like it. She’d never been kissed so thoroughly, so hungrily, that it made her feel like she could explode at any moment.
When he drew back, they were both trying to catch their breaths like a couple of sex-crazed teenagers.
With his arms still locking her body to his, he said in a low voice, “Do you have to go back with the truck tonight? We could go somewhere else.” Resting his forehead against hers, he stared into her eyes. “This doesn’t have to end.”
She ran her hand down his arm. “It does, Tank.”
Her reply surprised even herself, but he seemed to take it like a douse of cold water.
Tank took a quick step back and cleared his throat. “Sure. No problem.”
The scent of evening primrose wafting through the night air was now more annoying than romantic. Lena’s palms were still hot from where she’d gripped his hips, her mind still foggy, but she wasn’t so far gone enough to forget her common sense. The following day, she had several big orders to fill, so she had to be at the restaurant at 6:30 a.m. and ready to work. Indulging in her lust for this man would be reckless, and just plain foolish.
“I’m sorry, but I have a real busy day in the kitchen. I hope you understand. Besides, we don’t know each other well enough, right?”
Tank tilted his head and shrugged, as if it wasn’t anything to him. But his heated stare told her otherwise.
“You’re pissed at me.”
It’s for the best. He’d be a serious distraction.
“It’s no big deal. We flirted and kissed. I’d like your number, though. Maybe we could go out for dinner sometime.”
Needing to get a grip, she took a few shallow breaths as she assessed the awkward sexual tension dancing between them.
“Right now, I don’t think that’s possible. I’ve got a lot on my plate with the catering company, and going out on dates is something I just don’t have time for.”
“All work and no play—”
“I know, I know,” she said, waving her hands. “Look, I’m going to shoot it to you straight. We both got caught up in the moment. We’re at an engagement party, we’re attracted to each other, and you had too much to drink. The romance, the ambiance, the crashing waves…”
“I think it was more than strings of light, bourbon, and the fuckin’ ocean.”
Rubbing her eyes, she sighed. “I have to go, Tank. My staff is getting restless, and I’ve still got a million things to unload. I’m glad I met you.” Awkward!
Before he could say anything else in his deep, persuasive tone, she spun toward the truck and ran through the thick grass to the parking lot. There was really no other way to exit with dignity, especially when her brain was still rattling around the image of him naked, sprawled out on her sheets as she moved her lips down his body—
“Quit it,” she snapped out loud. “I’ve seen hot guys before and contained myself. This is nothing different.”
Opening the truck’s door, Matthew greeted her with a sly grin.
“Are you ready to head out, or are you still busy?”
“Let’s go. I’m exhausted, and in no mood to be teased.”
“No teasing. You got it, boss.”
Lena leaned her head against the passenger window as Matthew drove out of the lot. She didn’t dare look back at Tank. He’s probably disappointed because I screwed up his track record. I bet he’s calling Blondie right now. That thought made her stomach clench, but she ignored it.
All she wanted was to unload the trucks, go home, and crawl into her four-poster bed.
Lena
“I’m telling you, Fe, it was unlike any other kiss I’ve ever had in my life.” Lena rested her chin on her upturned palm, leaning against a shelf in the back of the supply closet in her bistro. Her best friend sat rapt over the video call, hanging on Lena’s every word.
“He was so passionate. It felt like we’d known each other for much longer than a few hours. And the way he crushed me to him and held me tight, made me feel cherished and protected. Ugh, I know that sounds crazy.”
Felicia chuckled. “I’m guessing he’s gorgeous as well?”
“Yeah. He’s all muscle, but not in a body-builder way. The guy definitely works out at the gym. He’s like an Instagram model, or someone off The Bachelor, but in a more rugged, tough guy way. The way he kissed me was something I’d never experienced before with any guy. He was fierce, possessive, gentle, protective, and sexy as hell. I loved it.”
“Maybe he goes by Tank because he brings women to their knees with one kiss, tanking any possibility of them not coming back for more.” Fe brushed back her soft pink hair and snapped her gum. “So why in the hell did you turn him down? It’s not like you meet someone who wows you every day. Brad was the last guy you were sort of interested in, and that was over a year ago.”
Lena sighed and swept a hand over her face. It’d been over a week since she and Tank had kissed, and she was still replaying it in her mind. A part of her regretted
that she hadn’t spent the night with him, but a larger part knew she’d done the right thing.
“You’re quiet. Are you having any regrets?”
“Maybe just a tiny bit. But between the catering business and the restaurant, all I can think about is getting enough sleep.”
Lena met her best friend’s soft brown eyes over their video call. Her know-it-all expression was pretty damning, making it absolutely clear what Felicia’s opinion was on the matter, and that was the reason it’d taken her a week to tell Fe about the kiss.
Chewing on the cuticle of her index finger, she leaned back in her chair. “Let me have it. I know you’re brewing on something, so let it out.” She glanced at the clock. “But I can only give you ten minutes. I have a meeting with a potential customer soon.”
Felicia grinned. “I’m glad you’re open to my opinion, seeing as I have your best interests at heart. First of all, I’m not going to chastise you for not telling me about Tank right away. Second, I’ve never seen you so excited and glowing over any man, and that includes Curtis—your first crush when we were in junior high. So why the fuck are you sabotaging your chance of having a relationship with him?”
“I’m not doing that,” Lena huffed.
“Yes, you are. You didn’t give him your phone number. You shut him down when he mentioned going out for dinner, and you shot him down after one of the hottest kisses of your life. Work is a poor substitute for a lover.”
“Fe, I don’t have time right now. You know that.”
Her best friend scoffed and gave her a no-nonsense stare. Lena crossed her arms, preparing for battle. There was nothing wrong with temporarily sacrificing her own happiness, especially when it was directly tied to her livelihood of a thriving restaurant business in a competitive market. Most businesses died out in the first five years, and she had no intention of becoming a statistic.
Fe gave her a pointed look. “Don’t look at me like that. I’ve heard it all before—you’re building a business, it takes time, resources, energy, yadda, yadda, yadda. I get it, I do, but I’m not saying you should marry the guy. I’m just talking one good night of pleasure, that’s all. It could really turn your month around, and it’s been a long time since you’ve even come close to being intimate with anyone. It’s psychologically healthy for you to put yourself out there every once in a while instead of focusing on nothing but work. If you don’t start getting out there, you’re going to become some kind of hermit who forgets how to interact with people.”
“I’m in the food industry. I’m with people all the time, so the chances of me becoming a hermit are slim. I have employees, clients, customers in the bistro, vendors, and so many other people I interact with daily.
“You know that’s not what I mean! We need to get you a life. Or soon the only intimacy you’ll be getting in your bed is with a microwaved brownie, binging Game of Thrones under your favorite blanket.”
Lena leaned forward, her chin in her hands. “That doesn’t sound too bad to me.” She smiled inwardly at the exasperation spreading across Fe’s face. “Okay, I’m listening. I get it, but there’s no point in worrying about it now. The moment’s gone, and I don’t have a time machine. I probably won’t see him again. But, I swear, the next time a delicious, gorgeous guy at an event wants to take me to bed, I’ll jump in on the action without question, and give you a full recap while he’s in the shower.”
Felicia pursed her lips and cocked her head, clearly thinking about her offer. “Add in some nudes of the guy in question and you have a deal.”
Lena burst out laughing, and Felicia joined in. After catching her breath, Lena said, “It’s a deal.” She checked the clock. “I gotta run. We’ll talk soon.”
“Wait! Can a visit from me fit into your busy schedule? I have some paid vacation time saved up.”
“I’d love for you to come visit. It seems like it’s been forever since we saw each other face-to-face. That would be amazing, Fe.”
“So you can spare the time, Ms. Business Woman Extraordinaire? I don’t want to rip you away from your spreadsheets and recipe developments.”
“I would love for you to come here. I’ll drop everything if I have to—you know I miss you like crazy. Just let me know as soon as you firm up the dates.”
“I was planning on booking the trip in the next month or two. It’s really not the same here without you, you know that. It’s been rough.”
Lena thought back over everything she had left behind in San Francisco to start her business in Santa Teresita. It had been a hard decision to leave her city, but looking back, she didn’t have many regrets. Moving to Santa Teresita was the fresh start she needed after what had happened—
A fresh stab of pain pierced her heart. She shook her head, not ready to dive into the past. She had a meeting with Mrs. Wright in less than five minutes, and she had to be on her A-game to secure the contract.
Felicia put her arms out, as if she were hugging Lena over the connection. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to bring everything up and make you sad. You’ve come a long way since your parents’ death, and I know it was hard. You needed this reset. It’s just that I miss you—we used to do everything together. And the rest of the group misses you too. We should all come and visit you one weekend. It’d be great to sleep in late, hang on the beach, and go dancing.”
“That would be fun. Let’s think about it.”
“We will—for sure. Again, I didn’t mean to make you sad.”
“I know, and it’s okay.” Lena blew out a deep breath and squeezed her eyes shut, forcing back the tears that still sometimes came unexpectedly whenever she thought about her parents’ tragic deaths. “Even though it’s going on four years, it still feels like it just happened.”
“I get it… well, as much as I can.” Felicia adjusted herself in her office chair. “No one expects their parents to die when they’re so young, and certainly not in a plane crash. I’m sure the idea of letting anyone else into your life must be hard. You know, the whole thing about not knowing if you could lose them like you lost your parents.”
Her best friend since grade school lapsed into silence, and they both sat with their own thoughts for a few seconds. There wasn’t anything Lena could add to the conversation. The truth was, there wasn’t a day that had gone by since the plane crash she hadn’t thought about her parents, and how much she missed them.
After the crash, she’d been in a heartbroken daze. After a couple of years of grief therapy, she’d been able to move forward. Settling in the place she and her parents used to vacation when she was a kid seemed like the perfect place to start over. As hard as she tried, there were days when the heartache and longing to hear her father’s laugh, or her mother’s sage advice, were overwhelming. Nothing had prepared her for her entire foundation to be rocked to the core for the rest of her life.
Sniffling, she offered Fe a weak smile.
“They would’ve been so proud of you. You know that, don’t you?” Felicia wiped a small tear from her cheek with her thumb and smiled back at her. “You’re everything they wanted in a daughter, and so much more, Lena. You just have to remember that they would want you to live outside of the lines too. Do something fun every now and then.”
She nodded, her throat still tight with unspoken emotion.
“Thanks, Fe. I needed that reminder.”
“Always. That’s what I’m here for, right?”
“Right.” Her attention went back to the clock and she bit off a curse. “I have to get going. Wish me luck on landing the contract with this customer. Text me as soon as you figure out the dates for your visit.”
“You’ll know every detail as I make them.”
Lena wrapped up the video chat. After her meeting with the customer, she had the dinner rush to help with. The hustle and bustle was a good distraction from the grief that was always present in her life.
Maybe Tank would’ve been the perfect crutch in her broken life. Until he shattered what’s left of my he
art. And she had no doubt he would. A night rolling around in the sheets with him couldn’t fix the cracks in her heart, despite what Felicia thought.
Lena pulled out a tube of lipstick and swiped the peachy color across her lips, raked her fingers through her long hair, then stood up and walked out of the office to meet Mrs. Wright.
The next two weeks were a blur of recipes, food tastings, catered parties, serving customers at the bistro, and selling so many croissants, Lena was actually dreaming about them.
Small slices of time spent on her balcony, watching the ocean while sipping a glass of lemonade or white wine—depending on the time of day—were her only reprieves from work. During those precious, quiet moments, Tank held a starring role in her thoughts. She’d been amazed that she hadn’t bumped into him, seeing as the town wasn’t that big. When she’d lived in San Francisco, she’d bump into people from high school quite often, so she’d thought for sure they would’ve run into each other over the past two weeks at some point.
When she wasn’t thinking about Tank’s kiss, Felicia’s advice about living in the moment, not letting life pass her by, festered in her brain. For the first time in two years since starting her business, she thought about her direction in life, seriously considering if she had allowed opportunities to slip away because of her hectic work schedule. There was being dedicated, and then there was ignoring mental and physical growth.
Lena made sure she took some dedicated time to think about what she wanted and needed. Her therapist would’ve been thrilled at the inner self-work she’d put into the question.
At the end of her contemplation, she realized that just because she had an article in the L.A. Times food section, a buzzing business, and a condo entirely in her name, that wasn’t enough. She was lonely. All of her friends lived in San Francisco, and since she’d moved to Santa Teresita, she hadn’t made any close ones. Of course, she had friends and colleagues, but it wasn’t the same. Yes, lonely. She’d replaced social interaction with work.
