“All the same,” Exley said, his tone pure steel, “I will not sacrifice my daughter to any man just because there is a danger of scandal. Eva’s happiness is more important to me than our family name or her reputation.”
It was the first time Godric felt any liking for the human icicle across from him. “And you believe a union with me is anathema to her happiness?”
“Now that, my lord, I do not know. What do you think? Your recent actions would indicate you hold my family in some dislike. Such behavior does not seem propitious for a happy marriage.” He paused, but Godric had nothing to add to his accurate, if painful, assessment. “I will not force her to marry you. I will not leave my daughter in your clutches if your intentions are to punish her.”
As insults went, it was masterful.
Godric’s impulse was to retaliate in kind, but the other man had more than enough reason to believe the worst of him.
“I’m deeply ashamed of my behavior toward your family.” He hesitated and then said something he’d hoped to keep between him and Eva. “Your daughter probably saved my life by kidnapping me from the Duke of Richland’s party.”
Exley’s eyebrows rose slightly, making Godric wonder irrationally just what it took to get a real reaction out of the man. “Please explain.”
“I went to Richland’s party planning to abduct your daughter-in-law.”
“James Brewster advised me of that, Visel, but not your motivation for such an odious action. Perhaps you might indulge me with it, now.”
The only time Godric could recall feeling so imperiled before was on a battlefield.
“I have no explanation, sir.” He shook his head, his thoughts jumbled as he tried to recall his thought process during the months leading up to that night. The rage that had driven him to increasingly reckless actions. “I wish I could say I would have come to my senses, but I have no certainty of that. If Eva had not acted, I would have made the worst mistake of my life.”
A muscle in Exley’s jaw flexed “Are you aware your cousin continued with your plans, Visel?”
“Good God! You mean he took Mrs. Marlington?”
“No. I mean he took Mr. Marlington’s child and held him for ransom.”
Godric had heard of people’s hearts seizing, but he’d never believed it was true. He surged to his feet. “Bloody hell! Is the child—”
Exley held up one slender white hand, his gaudy ruby signet ring winking dully. “The boy is safe.”
Godric slumped into his chair, his heart resuming its work, now pounding so hard he could feel it knocking against his ribs.
Exley continued. “Gabriel and Drusilla put a stop to his plans.” Exley’s gaze became even colder—which Godric wouldn’t have believed possible. “Your cousin’s plans were of a fatal nature.”
Godric squeezed his eyes shut as if that would block out the other man’s words. “Did—is—was anyone hurt?” he finally forced out, unable to look.
“Rowland died in the ensuing struggle, as did one of his cohorts. But Gabriel, Drusilla, the child, and Lord Byer were unharmed.”
That did make him open his eyes. “Byer was there?”
“Yes.”
No wonder the man hated him. Godric had to swallow several times to force down a lump of shame, relief, and fury—at himself. “I was not aware of his plans regarding the child. But I did instigate the matter with Mrs. Marlington, so I am not without blame.”
Exley just stared.
Godric had no idea what either of them would say next when the door opened and Eva stood in the doorway, her magnificent eyes flickering worriedly from her father to Godric as both men stood.
“I didn’t mean to interrupt.”
Godric hardly recognized this tame, spiritless version of the woman who’d kidnapped him and brandished weapons at highwaymen. He had to admit he did not care for it.
“Come in and sit, Eva,” Exley said in the same level, dead tone he said everything. He looked at Godric. “I believe we are finished here, are we not, Lord Visel? I’d like to have a private word with my daughter.” It was not a request.
Godric turned to Eva. He could hardly ask if she wished to be left alone with her own father, but he could see that she knew what he was silently asking, and she nodded slightly.
As he looked at her, it occurred to him that this might be the last time he’d see her. The marquess, he knew, would act swiftly once he’d made his decision. Although Godric had believed they were as good as married, he could not stand in Eva’s way if she chose to leave here with her father.
What he hadn’t expected was how such an admission would make him feel: hollow and cold and hopeless.
Chapter 20
Eva’s fear deserted her somewhere between her room and the parlor. For the first time in her life, she was not afraid of the disappointment she would see on her father’s face. But just because she wasn’t afraid didn’t mean that sitting without squirming beneath his icy stare was easy.
As they locked eyes with one another Eva wished, as she’d done a thousand times before, that she understood him—that he would show some part of himself, no matter how tiny, to anyone other than his beloved wife. Only with Mia did Adam de Courtney appear even remotely human. It was as if he had only enough of himself to spare for one person.
He wasn’t cruel to Eva and she knew he cared for her—as he did all his children—but the man himself was forever remote, a hazy promontory in the distance that she would never, ever reach, no matter how hard she strove for it.
Her sisters had stopped trying to know him years ago—around the time when Mia had come into their lives and provided so many of those things they’d been missing: like joy and affection. It wasn’t as if her aunt and grandmother—who’d raised them—hadn’t loved them, but both women had been as emotionally frozen as her father.
When it appeared that her father would be content to stare at her for the next eon, Eva asked the question that burned in her. “Has Mia entered her confinement? Has she—”
“Not yet.”
Although he would never say as much, she knew he was worried about Mia and anxious for her. Her stepmamma was not a young woman, and childbirth was not easy even for women half her age. Shame washed over Eva as she realized she’d taken away the person Mia loved most, her husband, in her time of need.
“Are Gabe and Dru—”
“They are well.”
Eva wanted to ask about Gabe’s son, Samir, but she didn’t know whether her brother had told their parents about the little boy yet, or not.
“Gabriel’s son, Samir, is also fine.”
Eva sagged with relief.
“I would like to talk about you, Eva.”
“Yes, Father.”
“Has Visel treated you well?”
The question surprised her. “Er—” An image of Godric kneeling between her thighs, his lips slick and—
A throat cleared, and Eva’s head whipped up. The marquess appeared. Eva squinted. Could that be embarrassment in his eyes?
No, impossible.
“Yes, he has treated me well,” she said.
“And do you wish to marry him?”
Eva gaped. “I’ve been with him for days, I—I understand that I must do the proper thing, that there is no other choice.”
“There are always other choices.” Her father’s voice was dry. “And this choice is yours, Eva, not Visel’s and not mine. If you do not wish to marry him, you shall leave here with me.”
“But . . . I don’t understand.”
“Answer the question, Eva. Do you wish to leave here as Visel’s wife? If so—” He reached into his pocket and handed her a neatly folded paper.
Eva unfolded it and stared. It was a special license with both her and Godric’s names on it.
“If you do not want him, you will leave with me and the matter will be forgotten.” His expression was cool and dispassionate.
At first Eva thought the snapping sound she heard happened in the room,
but then she realized it was only inside her own head. Something had broken—some bond or barrier—and years’ worth of anger came forth in a torrent.
Eva jumped to her feet. “Don’t,” she said in a voice that was so like his—so quiet and cold—that she momentarily shocked herself. “Don’t talk to me like that—like I’m nothing more than a problem to be solved and then filed away.”
If anything, his eyes became colder. “And how should I talk to you? Should I congratulate you for bringing me tearing across the country on such a matter?”
“No,” she whipped back. “Of course not. But you don’t have to treat me like a recalcitrant child.”
He gave a laugh that was utterly mirthless. “A child? You kidnapped a man. Not only that, but you did so with the assistance of a servant, a commoner who could be transported if Visel saw fit to bring charges against him for such a crime.”
The truth of his words was like a club and she shuddered at the danger she’d exposed her very best friend to. “I did it for Gabriel,” she retorted, barely able to force the words out. “I just wanted to help him, Papa. I didn’t—”
God. What if they’d been caught? What if Godric hadn’t been who he was, but a petty individual disposed to punish those weaker than himself? What if James had gone to jail?
Eva squeezed her eyes shut, but the tears flowed anyway.
And then the impossible happened: strong arms closed around her, the unprecedented action robbing her of all the strength she’d husbanded for this confrontation. She gave in to her emotions and sagged against her father’s lean, spare body, her own shaking with the force of her weeping. The events of the past weeks and months were a jumble in her mind—those of the last few days even more confusing. But somehow he managed to keep it all at bay, by holding her tight with one arm and stroking her hair with his free hand.
“Shhh, Eva,” he murmured, his breath hot on her scalp. “I’m sorry,” he said, his voice strained. “You are right, Daughter. I should speak to you as a woman, not a girl.”
His apology—and the admission that followed—was so surprising that her convulsive sobs stopped as abruptly as they’d started.
Her father had apologized to her.
She felt his body shake and realized he was chuckling—the Marquess of Exley was actually laughing. Eva was glad he was holding her upright or she might have fainted from the shock of it.
“If I’d known those words would quiet you so quickly, I might have used them years ago.” The gentle amusement in his voice made her heart expand with all the love she felt for him; all the love he didn’t want from her.
His hand continued its soothing stroking, his low voice rumbling through her. “I wish your stepmamma were here, Eva. She’d know what to say. Mia always knows what to say.” He sighed. “I’ve not been much of a father to you, I know.” She made a demurring noise. “No, don’t deny it,” he said, his voice heavy with regret as he released her, holding her at arm’s length until they could meet each other’s eyes. Eva could only gaze in wonder. When had her father ever worn this expression before? Self-doubt, shame, and a host of other emotions mingled on his usually expressionless visage.
He released her and she wanted to pull him back, but he left her only long enough to bring his chair closer to hers. “Sit,” he said, taking her hand when she did so, his fingers warm and strong. “It doesn’t matter what happened between you and Visel these past few days, or who knows about it.” She knew what he meant: consummation. “I will not let you go to a man who will not value and respect you.” He hesitated, his pale face flushed, and he gave a smile that almost looked shy. “I love you too much to do that, Eva.” She blinked and he laughed. “She will be insufferable.” At her confused look he said, “Mia has told me for years that I should tell my children how I feel.” An expression of pain spasmed across his face. “I would give my life for you, Eva, and I want only happiness for you.”
Eva’s eyes began to tighten and his lips curved into a smile that actually showed a flash of slightly crooked teeth. Had she ever seen her father’s teeth before?
“Please don’t cry again, Eva; it turns me into a puling coward.”
Eva gave a watery laugh at his ridiculous claim.
“I wish you had time to make this decision, but there is none. Not only is the situation volatile, but I must get back.” He didn’t have to say why, and she certainly agreed with him. “If you decide you wish to leave with me, rest assured I will see that no word of these past few days gets out.” His expression hardened and Eva shivered at the cold determination she saw; the man was implacable.
“You should know that Byer has expressed a desire to marry you. When he learned that you were with Visel, well, he expressed his feelings for you most vocally. I’ll be the first to admit I’d not expected such depths from the man,” he said musingly, and then shrugged. “He told me he loves you.” An hour ago that news would have stunned her, but she’d seen the truth of her father’s claim in Tommy’s eyes. “You needn’t accept Byer or Visel, Eva. You can come home to Exham. Mia and I were planning to tell you this summer that you needn’t return to London. The only reason we insisted on one Season was to give you an opportunity to experience something other than school or life at Exham. It wasn’t meant to be a punishment.”
He looked so remorseful that Eva felt bad about the way she’d behaved for months on end. “It wasn’t all a punishment, Papa. I enjoyed being with Gabe and Drusilla. But I do not want to have another Season—especially without them.”
“So that is settled, then. If yo u decide to come back, we can find something else for you to do.” His lips twitched up on one side. “I know you’ve got a fine eye for cattle and I wouldn’t be opposed to giving in to Brewster’s incessant nagging to buy more bloodstock. We’ve certainly got the room for you to try your hand at breeding—on a small scale,” he added when Eva squeezed his hand hard enough to make him wince.
“Oh, Papa! Really?”
He was definitely smiling now. “Oh, Eva, really.”
She warmed under his teasing more than his actual offer, although the offer was the culmination of all her dreams. She could return to Exham and actually raise horses? It had been all she’d wanted since the time she’d cajoled Brewster to allow her to attend her first foaling.
It sounded too good to be true. Eva met his questioning, curious stare. “You really mean I could choose my own stock, have a hand in actual daily operations and not just watch from a ladylike distance?”
He raised his hands in a gesture of surrender. “Yes, yes, yes. You will be your own mistress in this matter—short of bringing your cattle into the castle or moving yourself into the stables, of course.” He hesitated and then said, “For some time Mia has argued you have talents that are not being utilized. I agree—you are a superlative horsewoman. She’s also argued you should be allowed to develop your talents without certain, er, how did she put it—ignorant male hindrance.”
Eva laughed. Yes, that sounded like Mia.
He gestured to her clothing. “I agree that gowns in the foaling or breeding sheds are dangerous.” Eva began to grin and he lifted an admonishing finger. “You will be allowed such liberties on my property only, Eva. The first time I catch you riding astride in town and scandalizing villagers—”
“Of course, Papa.” She bit down on her smile. It was like a dream come true; it was the only thing she’d ever wanted.
Godric’s face, red, smiling, and sweaty, flashed through her mind’s eye. Not the only thing you’ve ever wanted.
She lifted her hands to her hot cheeks and shook her head. No.
It is true. You’ve had him for these few nights and you want more. You want more of him and the things he can do to you, for you . . .
Her father squeezed her hand, the action piercing her erotic imaginings. “The decision is up to you, Eva.”
He released her hand and stood. “I will leave you for a little while to think on it. I am taking Bounder into town. I left
James in charge of securing a decent team for our chaise.”
“James is here?” The marquess winced at her screech. “Sorry, Father, but—I’m just surprised he is with you.”
“It seemed a prudential decision for several reasons.” He frowned at her. “He was quite stricken to have left you, Eva.”
She nodded miserably.
“I know you are not insensible to the wrongs you have done him, or the difficult position you put him in,” he said, reading her expression accurately. “I assured him that he mended the situation as well as he could have after his initial mistake.”
“It was all my fault, Papa. James didn’t want to come along. I know he just came to keep me safe.”
“I know it was your fault. But perhaps in the future he will know to talk some sense into you or find somebody else who will talk some sense into you, before giving in to your every demand.”
“Thank you for not punishing him, Papa.”
One dark brow arched. “It is not for me to punish him. I will leave that in Brewster’s capable hands.”
Eva winced; James’s father was as terrifying as her own.
“Yes, just so,” the marquess said, once again interpreting her correctly. “Now, if there is nothing else?”
Eva shook her head as she looked up into her father’s blue eyes—eyes clouded with concern now rather than disappointment—and thought of Godric’s, and how she’d believed they were similar. Other than being blue, they were nothing alike, she saw now. Oh, her father and Godric were both strong, powerful men—they shared that characteristic. She respected her father a great deal and saw many of his qualities in Godric—for all that Godric had behaved like a madman these past months.
But he’d not acted like a madman these past few days. He’d apologized for how he’d behaved and appeared genuinely ashamed of his actions. If there was one thing Eva could sympathize with, it was being ashamed of one’s actions.
As the door closed behind the marquess, she sagged back in her chair.
She could lie to herself all day long, but the truth was that she did want Godric.
Outrageous Page 26
