by Regina Scott
Sorrow trembled in her voice. Forgiveness was surprisingly easy. Trust, however, was harder.
“You did what you thought you must to survive,” he told her. “I see that. That’s what I did too. But are you well now? I know too many people who have been hurt by this Panic.”
She nodded. “My last husband left me well off, with solid investments that should see me through. I’ve found friends in my church to sustain me. And you? You made a life for yourself? You have friends, a family?”
Cora’s face sprang to mind.
“I have friends,” he allowed. “Land out in the Succotash Valley, a cabin, a barn.”
She frowned. “Then how did you win an offer with the Bank of Commerce?”
“Mr. Winston, the bank director, and his daughter, Coraline Baxter, needed a guide to climb Mount Rainier.”
She pressed a hand to her chest. “You must have done an exceptionally good job to be offered a position as cashier.”
“Associate director,” he corrected her.
She blinked, then her brows came down. “They want something from you. You mustn’t compromise your integrity, Nathan. You know where that can lead.”
“I,” Nathan said, “am not my father.”
She cringed and looked away. “No, of course not. But your face just now, when you spoke of your land and your cabin. You love them. And you’re obviously good at this guide business to find a way for Miss Baxter to reach the summit.”
Nathan chuckled. “If I hadn’t been along, she’d have found a way to do it herself.”
“Perhaps,” his mother said. “But you think you would be happy returning to society now?”
“I don’t know,” Nathan admitted. “That’s one of the reasons I’m considering refusing.”
“And the others?” she asked.
He should not confide in her. This change in her attitude was too unexpected. Yet she genuinely seemed to care about the decision, about him. She’d once been his biggest supporter. Shouldn’t he try to find a way to bridge the chasm between them?
“I’m in love with Cora,” he said.
Her smile was sad. “So are a great many men, I hear, or at least in love with what she represents—beauty, wealth, power. Small wonder Mr. Kincaid proposed. Or are you merely hoping to steal his bride the way he robbed your father of hope?”
Nathan stiffened. “It’s not that. You didn’t see her on the mountain. She was focused and fearless. She knew what she wanted, but she was prepared to give it all up if it meant protecting her stepfather. When she smiles, the world is a better place.”
“I see she made quite an impression,” his mother said. “And does Miss Baxter feel the same way about you, despite her engagement?”
A shame he could not tell her the truth about Cora’s engagement, but he’d promised to keep it quiet. Nathan leaned back against the sofa. “I don’t know how Cora feels. Sometimes I think she does. Other times I wonder how she could.”
She raised her chin. “Nonsense. Any girl would be fortunate to marry my son.”
Now that sounded like the mother he remembered.
“Hence the interest in the bank position,” he said. “Coraline Baxter can’t marry a mountain man. She can marry the associate director of a bank.”
She cocked her head. “If Coraline Baxter cannot marry a man with a cabin in the Succotash Valley and the skills to climb a mountain, then perhaps that man has no business marrying her.”
Nathan shook his head. “Spoken like my mother.”
She reached out and took his hands. “Then allow me to be your mother and share with you what I’ve learned from this tragedy with your father. We can too easily focus on the wrong circumstances. He wanted position, standing, and so did I. I blame myself for not encouraging him to put more important things first. Faith. Family. It’s taken me years to reach that point. Here, I’ll show you.” She released him to go to a hutch along one wall, bending to open the doors at the base. Lifting out the instrument, she brought it to him.
“My violin,” Nathan marveled, taking it from her hands. Not a speck of dust marred the gold of the wood, as if she’d tended it, waiting for him to come claim it.
“I never forgot,” she murmured. “Don’t make the same mistake we did, Nathan. Choose a profession that provides satisfaction, and surround yourself with people who honor that choice. Anything else leads to sorrow.”
Her words, her care of the violin, touched something inside him. “Thank you, Mother. Whatever I decide, I hope you and I can remain family.”
Her silver-gray eyes swam with tears. “Oh, I’d like that very much. And your Cora too.”
His Cora. He could only hope.
30
Cora winced as her mother laid a cold compress on her face where she stretched out on her bed. Her teeth ached, and the hand mirror Lily brought her showed the purple spreading across her cheek.
“You cannot go out in public like this,” her mother said, stepping back to eye her. “People will talk.”
“Let them,” Cora said, handing the mirror back to her maid. “If we’re to be part of a scandal, I’d be delighted to tell them exactly how I came to sport this bruise. I’ll start with Mimi and the other suffragettes tonight.”
“That will be all, Lily,” her mother said, and the maid curtsied before leaving.
“Don’t cause a stir, Cora,” her mother said in the quiet that followed. “Perhaps this will all blow over, without Mr. Kincaid resorting to blackmail. I only heard the end of his horrid conversation with you, but that’s what he implied. He intends to ruin your reputation by ruining mine.”
Now her stomach ached as much as her teeth. “Yes, Mother. But we will survive. We must.”
“But if Mr. Kincaid tells the story,” her mother said, eyes shadowed, “I’ll never find a good match for you.”
“Perhaps,” Cora said, “we can dispense with finding a good match.”
Her mother’s lips trembled. “You mustn’t give up, darling. He may not be believed. Not everyone appreciates his finer qualities.”
“After today, Mother, I think we can agree that Mr. Kincaid has no finer qualities.”
“Yes, you’re right.”
The concession was said so softly, Cora had to remove the compress and turn to look at her mother to make sure she’d heard correctly. “Did we just agree on something?”
“I’m sure I don’t know why that would surprise you,” her mother said with her usual sniff. “You were always clever. It was only a matter of time before you saw things my way.”
Cora started laughing, then winced again as her face protested.
Her mother rose, smile hinting. “Now, then, Coraline, you have been through a great deal. You should rest. I’ll send Charlie to let Mimi know you won’t be attending the meeting tonight. Lily can bring you some chamomile.”
She ought to protest, but she was as tired as when she’d climbed the mountain. As her mother left, Cora rolled onto her back, replaced the compress, and closed her eyes. Rest, her mother said. That was the expectation of society—that she faint, recline, while others dealt with the difficulties that had laid her low. Why couldn’t she convince even her mother that she would never be that person? Would Mrs. Ashford go into a decline if she faced penury? Would Susan Longmire refuse to rise if a flood threatened? Fay Fuller certainly hadn’t shrunk from climbing a mountain.
So why was she shrinking even for a moment from the idea of accepting Nathan’s proposal, should he offer?
Nathan was fresh air, blowing away the doubt and worry.
Nathan was truth, strength. He’d showed her a better way to worship, to find faith again.
Nathan was her alpenstock. She could lean on him, knowing he’d be there to help and encourage.
Yes, she would have to give up everything she’d been raised to embrace, but wasn’t he worth the sacrifice?
Sacrifice?
She sat up so suddenly the compress fell into the lap of her gown. Why hadn’t she
seen it before? She’d been as bad as her mother—focusing on the trappings of wealth, determined to use them to gain independence, for herself and other women. An independent woman would always be odd in the sort of society her mother favored. She’d be whispered about behind painted fans, gossiped about over tea in bone china cups. She would be made to feel out of place, an aberration, so as to maintain that very society.
In her own way, she was as trapped as the women who married men like Cash Kincaid to keep up appearances. An independent woman would never be valued for who she was, what she’d accomplished, perhaps for a while even after they’d won the vote.
But she would be accepted, even applauded, in Nathan’s world.
He’d said society no longer fit, and she’d felt the same. Now she knew why.
Lily eased into the room then, as if expecting to find Cora in a swoon. She started when she saw her sitting up, and the tea sloshed in the cup.
Cora rose to take it from her hand. “Thank you, Lily. I need you to bring me the city directory and my father’s travel desk. I’ll have you deliver notes for appointments tomorrow. I have a future to secure, for myself, my mother and father, and anyone who relies on Cash Kincaid. And I don’t mind causing a stir to do it.”
Cora was out of the house the next morning before her mother rose. She breakfasted with her father first.
“Your poor face, dearest,” he said as he regarded her over his coffee. “Your mother told me what happened. I’ve half a mind to accost Kincaid myself, but I fear this is at least partly my fault.”
Cora set down her cup. Chewing didn’t hurt as much this morning as it had last night, but she had no intention of sampling the ham on the sideboard. “I will never agree you had any part in Kincaid’s schemes.”
“His schemes, no.” He pleated the napkin beside his plate, gaze dropping. “But I couldn’t hide the truth from him, and I shouldn’t have hidden it from you. I heard the story from your mother Sunday evening. I simply didn’t want you to be angry with her. Can you forgive me?”
“Father.” When he looked up, she smiled. “Of course I forgive you. I’ve forgiven Mother as well. But I need you both to understand that I must make my own choices about my future.”
He peered closer. “You are still considering Nathan, are you not? I find him in all ways a good man.”
“So do I,” Cora assured him, rising. She came around the table and pressed a kiss to his cheek. “I’ve a number of errands to run today. I will only come into the bank for a moment.”
He waved a hand. “Whatever you need, dearest.”
She returned home just before dinner, thoroughly pleased. She had never considered showing her previous assessment of Cash Kincaid’s business practices to anyone else. How gratifying that others found it as persuasive as she had.
Darcy met her at the door, as if she’d been keeping watch.
“Mr. Hardee is here,” she murmured as she took Cora’s hat and gloves. “He’s with your mother in the formal parlor, and neither looks too happy about it, if you don’t mind my saying.”
“I’ll see to it,” Cora promised, and Darcy hurried away as if she didn’t want to be near enough to scold.
Cora smoothed down her blue-striped skirts. She’d dressed to impress for her meetings with the worker organizations, but she didn’t mind the tailored shirtwaist or the lace at her cuffs and throat. She looked every inch a lady who knew her own mind. Only her heart seemed to protest, for it was pounding faster than her steps as she strolled into the room.
Her mother was in her favorite chair, skirts held close. Nathan, once more in his mountain clothes, was again relegated to a chair by the window, where he might not dirty anything important.
He rose at the sight of her. “Cora.” His eyes widened as his gaze touched her face, and he took a step forward. “Are you all right? What happened?”
“An accident,” her mother answered calmly. “I advised her to rest, but young ladies these days are so determined to prove themselves competent.”
“You needn’t posture, Mother,” Cora said, going to join him. “By tomorrow, everyone in Tacoma will know the depths to which Mr. Kincaid can sink.”
Her mother frowned as if she wondered about Cora’s meaning, but Nathan’s fingers grazed Cora’s cheek, cool against the heat of the bruise. “He did this? He won’t live the night.”
She caught his fingers. “No! I am honored you wish to protect me, but I have this in hand. And I will not have you stoop to his level.”
He studied her a moment longer before nodding. “As you wish.”
She squeezed his fingers before turning. “Mother, I intend to say some very pointed and personal things to Nathan. You are welcome to stay, but I will understand if you prefer to leave. And under no circumstances may you interrupt, explain away my words, or argue against them.”
Her mother brushed off her skirts. “This is how you speak to me?”
“Sadly, yes,” Cora said. “I love you, Mother, but I must do what I know to be right.”
She waited for the protest, the scold, the guilt that would wrap around her and squeeze her purpose from her heart. Instead, her mother rose and glided from the room without another word.
Well! Cora hid her smile of triumph, squared her shoulders, and faced Nathan. He was regarding her with a half smile.
“You look like you did the day we first met,” he said. “A plan in mind and determined to achieve it. Should I be afraid?”
Her mouth was dry. “Perhaps. This plan is even more important than climbing Rainier. I have a proposal for you.”
He cocked his head. “I’m listening.”
She drew in a breath. “I want to marry you, but I’m aware I’m not made to be the sort of wife many men prefer. I can’t cook or sew beyond embroidery, but you know I’m not afraid of hard work or learning new skills. I will not grovel or humble myself before you. If you’re wrong, I’ll tell you. If I compliment you, it will be because you earned it. We’ll live by the lake, build the accommodations you wanted, help others climb the mountain. I won’t miss Tacoma. I have no interest in maintaining appearances or in trying to pretend I enjoy society. I will, of course, work with Mrs. Ashford to drum up support for women’s rights.” She stuck out her hand. “What do you say?”
“No,” he said.
Cora blinked, hand falling. “No? But I thought . . .”
He opened his arms and pulled her closer. “I love you, Cora, and nothing would make me happier than to be your husband. But not under those terms. Allow me to make you a counterproposal.”
She gazed up at him. Her eyes were as bright as a sunny morning and warmed him nearly as much. But she could not like his refusal. Would she refuse him in turn? He held his breath.
“I’m listening,” she said.
He allowed himself to relax a little. “I’m not what your mother would expect for you in a husband either.”
She rolled her eyes. “I’ve had quite enough of that sort, I promise you.”
“Still, you should be warned. I’ve grown a bit set in my ways. I tend to order people about. Like you, I have strong opinions, and I’m not shy about stating them.”
A smile tugged at her pretty lips. “Do tell.”
His smile was building as well. “But I understand what you bring to a marriage—strength, determination, and drive. You light up every room you enter. You give me confidence to try.”
A slight frown marked her brow. “Then why refuse me?”
He gave her a squeeze. “Because you see things I’ve never considered, opportunities and threats. Maybe that’s why you saw so clearly what I’d even hidden from myself. When my father died, I ran away. I came out of the experience a better man, but I abandoned my friends and family all the same. I don’t want you to make the same mistake.”
“I’m not running away,” she protested. “I’m running toward something—you, our future together.”
“I see that, but you’re still leaving people you love behi
nd—your mother and Winston. Miss Carruthers. You’re leaving work you enjoy. So, here’s what I propose. Marry me, come live in the shadow of the mountain with me, allow me to love and honor you all the days of my life. Spring through fall, we will stay at the cabin, build our retreat, and show others the joy of God’s creation.”
She nodded as if considering it. “And the rest of the year?”
“When the snow starts to fly, we’ll move into town and assist Winston at the bank. We’ll see them other times of the year, of course. Until there’s a closer store, we’ll still need to make a supply run every month.”
He gazed down at the woman who had become as important to him as breath. “So, what do you say, Cora? Will you marry me?”
“Yes.”
Surprise made his hands fall. “That easy?”
She wrapped her arms about his waist as if to keep him close. “I review proposals, remember? I can see the merits in this one. Besides, I love you too.”
He had to kiss her then. All the fire, all the promise, all the joy rushed through him. This, this was real and true. This was right.
This was love.
31
Cora clung to him, joy stealing speech and thought. She’d wondered whether such feelings could last. These were true and sure. They would only grow with time. Here, with him, was where she was meant to be. This was her calling.
From out in the hall came the sound of the door, then hurried footsteps. “Coraline, Mrs. Winston! Oh, you must hear.”
Cora separated from Nathan as her father bustled into the parlor, hat askew and mustache spiking. If he noticed them still standing scandalously close, he didn’t show it.
“You will not believe it,” he declared, pacing about the room. “I scarcely believe it. Where is your mother? She must hear this.”
“Calm yourself, Mr. Winston,” her mother said, moving into the room in a whisper of silk. “What could possibly warrant such emotion?”
Had her mother been in the room a few moments earlier, she would have seen a rather thorough display of emotion. Cora exchanged smiles with Nathan and knew he was thinking the same.
