by S M Mala
‘Don’t fuss,’ sighed Dora. ‘I’m fine, but I had a few problems. I think it was the mask and I’m a little tired, that’s all.’
Instantly Maddy felt sick, and she froze with worry, knowing Dora would hear it in her voice, so she coughed instead.
‘Maddy? Are you still there?’
‘Yeah. It’s all the training this morning. It has taken it out of me,’ she mumbled. ‘You would tell me if there was anything wrong, wouldn’t you? Because if you don’t, I’ll just ask your mum.’
‘Carry on training and come and see me on Monday, if you can. We need to discuss my thirteenth party. I have some really good ideas and-.’ Dora burst out laughing. ‘You do know it’s going to happen the day before you do the fun run, don’t you?’
‘Yes,’ she lied, not thinking she would go through with the fundraiser because she was going to plot a way out of it. ‘What’s the problem?’
‘Are you sure about doing it? I’ll come and watch for the fun of it. Do you think you’ll finish? Last time was only three kilometers and you only did one.’
‘Yes, yes, well, I’ll prove you all wrong. I’m a fighter, and I can do things. Back then it was a tough run over some very tough terrain.’
‘A flat playing field.’
‘It might have been flat, but there were pot holes I kept tripping into. I can do it. Wait and see. I’ll surprise everyone.’
‘You’ll surprise yourself if you complete it.’
‘Well, you’re going to be in shock then aren’t you? Better go. Enjoy your weekend, and I’ll see you on Monday. Love you, Dora.’
‘Love you too!’
Maddy gulped hard and wondered if she should text or call Linda to find out what was wrong with Dora. Then she remembered Lance at his party and felt sad and upset, knowing you could never be quite sure what was going to happen next.
Phyllis came running past, and she realised Stan was jogging beside her with a frown.
‘I’ll jog now,’ she said, starting to go a bit faster but felt him put his hand on her arm. ‘I needed a rest.’
‘Are you okay?’
‘Yes, I’m fine.’
‘Barking Maddy, I can see it in your eyes, the worry. What’s wrong?’ Stan stopped as so did she. ‘You keep having these little glimpses of sadness.’
‘Dora said she felt unwell last night and she won’t tell me what’s wrong,’ she said in one breath before taking another deep one. ‘I worry so much, but I have to pretend I don’t because she can see right through me. Then Dr. Bob told me that Lance is poorly, and his health is degenerating fast. Jerome’s cancer has come back, and I just know if anything happens to either one of them it will break Dora’s heart. It’s horrible, just horrible. Dr Bob tried to talk to me about preparing for Dora’s health getting worse. I didn’t listen. Then I complain about doing a stupid little run, and they’d give their right arms to be able to do it!’
‘Jesus!’ he said, holding her by the shoulders. ‘Do you want to breathe now?’
‘I feel sick.’
And it wasn’t because she was unwell, it was the stress in her stomach making her feel that something was weighing it down. Bubbling away inside was hurt and anger about what was going on, but she knew she had to control it.
She would be mad to succumb to the little blimp in her wellbeing.
Not to mention her feeling of knowing it was going to take over her life again.
That was the last thing she wanted to happen.
‘He’s done what?’
Pearl was sitting in Maddy’s living room after leaving Honey with her husband for the afternoon. ‘Asked you to redecorate it?’
‘After the work’s done. Stan thought he might like some professional help.’
‘I agree with that,’ Maddy replied with a mischievous grin. ‘But mental not interior design.’ She paused for a moment. ‘So, you’ve been in his flat?’
‘I’ve seen pictures of it.’ Pearl put down a glass of water and looked startled. ‘You’ve never been in?’
‘Nope! He has never invited me. I know he has had a few parties since we got introduced but it seems I was left off the invitation list.’ Biting her lip, she was trying hard to hide her little pang of disappointment. ‘I’m on the outside looking in, once again.’
Letting out a deep sigh, Pearl rested against the couch and closed her eyes. She still looked tired and out of sorts but Maddy remembered what Stan said about not pushing her.
‘I know,’ sighed Pearl. ‘I look like shit, and I feel like shit. I wanted to apologise to you for last week. One minute I was fine and the next, I have no energy to speak.’
‘It’s down to having a baby.’
‘I don’t know what she’s doing in my home. I don’t know who she is.’
‘She’s Honey,’ Maddy meekly replied. ‘The longed-for child. The most beautiful thing I have ever seen in my whole life. You and TJ created something special.’
‘Thanks for the comment about his family having big heads. He told me you came to visit and gave him a telling off. Thing is Maddy, I’m not bonding with Honey, and I feel alien to what’s going on around me, let alone what happened to my body. It’s not working.’ Pearl opened her eyes. ‘I know what you’re going to say, but I don’t even want to seek medical help. It’s the way it is.’
There was nothing Maddy could say to respond to her friend’s comments but listen. It hurt her to see that with the perfect life and now family, something was troubling Pearl.
‘Are you saying it’s not only about Honey? Are things okay with you and TJ?’
‘I don’t know. He doesn’t say much, just pussy foots around if I'm honest. I feel trapped. It’s monumental having a baby, and I’m so scared being left alone with her. Heidi keeps saying that I’m relying on her too much and I need to take over. I can’t. I don’t want to.’ Pearl licked her lips which were a little dry and stared at Maddy. ‘I wish I never had her.’
All Maddy could do was hug her friend tightly and show her that she was there for her.
Pearl’s mind set was that she didn’t care what she said, and she would no more care what the other person thought. It didn’t matter. All that mattered was she was unhappy and seemed lost in her life. She released her and stroked Pearl’s face.
‘You’re thirty-one years old and tried for a long time, I know it. There’s no rush for you to bond with Honey. You won’t do anything bad to her.’ Just then Pearl darted her a glance. ‘No, you wouldn’t. And if you have dark thoughts, you walk away and leave her in a safe place then call me immediately.’
‘I don’t want to hurt her, but I wish she’d go away. Just go away and give me back my old life.’ Pearl started to cry, and Maddy was at a loss to do.
She was so used to seeing parents grieve for their sick and dying babies, not a parent who was upset that their child was living and breathing.
‘I’m here for when you need me,’ Maddy whispered. ‘But I am going away for my birthday for three nights to Rome to wish for a man at the Trevi Fountain. I’m flying out on 12th June and will return on 14th June. I have so much loose change right now I might extend to the 30th. TJ and Ted are very kind to donate their euros when they return from trips.’
‘Why do you want to celebrate alone? I thought you’d have a party or something.’
‘I’m alone most of the time, so it makes no difference. I want to be somewhere pretty to eat ice cream and think about life.’ Maddy noticed Pearl was staring. ‘And no, you can’t come with me. If I put money into the fountain and you’re there, you will pull, and I won’t. That goes without saying.’
Pearl let out a little laugh. It had been ages since she had heard it which made Maddy smile.
‘And you know what? Well, you don’t. Guess who I saw? Okay, you won’t guess. Tara!’ Maddy leaned back and stared as Pearl’s eyed widened. She looked just as surprised as Maddy had. ‘In a car with two children or toy boys, couldn’t figure it out.’
‘What did you do?�
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‘I hid and then went home straight away. It might have been twelve years ago we left school, but I’ve not forgotten that thing!’
‘How did she look?’
‘Plastic fantastic and slutty.’
That was their code for someone who had plastic surgery and enhanced bits on their bodies, more than likely with a fake tan.
‘That bad?’ asked Pearl starting to nod. ‘She might have moved locally.’
‘Better not have!’ barked Maddy, standing up with her hands-on hips. ‘If she comes near me I’m going to give her one.’ She then demonstrated her air punch. ‘And it’ll hurt.’
‘And you’ll get arrested for grievous bodily harm, probably puncturing one of her fake tits.’
‘It’d be worth it.’
They heard the door open, and she saw Phyllis come bounding into the living room, jumping up onto the armchair while barking. Maddy ran to her and gave a kiss and hug.
‘Hello,’ Stan said walking in and kissing Pearl. ‘Good to see you.’
‘Sorry about last week,’ she said, getting to her feet.
‘You apologised already, and I told you there’s nothing to say,’ he replied, all too sweetly, as Maddy frowned. ‘You were feeling a little off, and that happens from time to time to most people.’ Then he glanced at Maddy. ‘Except her with the sunshine beam and constant happy chat.’
‘She must be driving you round the bend,’ said Pearl, grabbing her bag and jacket. ‘You get used to after a while. I’ve had sixteen years practice.’
‘Ear plugs by any chance?’
They both laughed as Maddy shook her head from side to side.
‘Excuse me!’ Maddy hissed, glaring at the pair. ‘I’m in the room, you know.’
‘How can I ever forget?’ he sighed and grinned. She noticed Pearl look at Stan then at her. ‘Anyway, we’ll catch up about the plans for the flat then you can start working on it after they’ve sorted out the plastering and repaired the floor.’
‘It might take a little longer because the builder mentioned the plaster drying out.’
‘How long?’
‘A week or two.’
‘I see.’ Stan glanced at Maddy. ‘I might have to stay here a bit longer if that’s okay.’
‘Do I have a choice?’ she replied, secretly liking the idea.
‘I’m looking forward to it, Stan. Thanks for the opportunity. I do need a change of scene.’ Pearl walked towards Maddy and kissed her cheek. ‘Be good, and I’ll see you in a couple of days.’
‘Fine!’ She let out a huff. ‘Do you want me to walk you back home or do you want a cab?’
‘Maddy, I’m fine.’
‘You should be home in twenty minutes. I’ll call you then to see if you’ve turned up. I think it’s best you go straight there.’
‘Yes, mum,’ Pearl replied, walking out. ‘Bye Stan.’
‘Bye.’
Maddy followed her to the door and watched her friend walk out. Then she ran to the sofa by the window to check Pearl was going in the right direction before sitting on the sofa and seeing Stan look at her. She checked the time.
‘Will you ever give up, little irritant, when it comes to organising people’s lives and making sure the world is rosy?’ he asked in a flat tone. ‘I’ve spent the morning with people trying to put an upwards spin on my work. It’s very annoying.’
‘Hello Stanley, how are you this fine day?’ she asked, grinning at him just to wind the man up. ‘It’s a lovely day for April. I do like spring sunshine.’
He had shaved and looked reasonable neat in a denim shirt hanging out over his jeans. A hat was perched on his head as he mumbled something back.
‘Not all that good?’ continued Maddy. ‘Pearl popped round and told me a few things. It was pretty worrying, to say the least.’ She thought about what was said. ‘I hope she’s going to be okay. Maybe it’s more spiritual therapy she needs, like work.’
Then she did a double take. Stan took off his hat and had cut his hair quite short.
It was extremely unnerving as her mouth dropped open because he looked too attractive for words.
‘Yeah, I know,’ he said, pushing his hand through his hair. ‘It’s a bit shorter than usual, but I wanted a change.’
‘Yeah,’ was all she could say while nodding and noticed Phyllis was looking with her tongue hanging out.
Maddy was aware that if she were a dog and looked at Stan right now, she’d be doing the same thing.
‘Looks all right,’ mumbled Maddy walking towards the kitchen and putting some dishes away.
‘And you don’t mind me staying longer? I thought when we saw Pearl that she needed a focus and what better way to look at my home. While it’s being repaired, she can also give it an added polish.’
‘Sounds like a plan.’ Maddy wondered if Pearl could do the work for him considering her current mind set. ‘And if she falters then I’m around to give you some of my creative input.’ There was a laugh behind her back as she turned to see him staring up at the ceiling. ‘What’s so funny?’
‘You are.’
‘I get the impression you don’t think I’m good at much other than looking after your pooch and you.’
‘You’re not very good at looking after me,’ he said, slumping onto the sofa as Phyllis got off the armchair and went to sit next to him. ‘Her? Well, there’s nothing you won’t do.’ Stanley touched the collar. ‘I don’t like it. It’s not me.’
‘It’s not supposed to be about you. It’s about her.’ Maddy admired Phyllis looking pretty in her collar and smiled. ‘I think we should put her forward for modelling. You’d make some money there.’
‘No.’
‘I see. You don’t want to exploit her.’
‘I don’t want you gallivanting around town with my dog on the excuse you’re taking her to auditions or shoots because then I’ll never see her again.’ Stan smiled at her as if he was thinking something. ‘For your thirtieth, can you dump the girlie outfits and start trying to look like an adult?’
‘I won’t change for any man.’ Maddy folded her arms. ‘Only for me.’
‘Right, so this is going to entail some weird psychology.’ Stan sat up as so did Phyllis. ‘See my dog?’
‘Yes.’
‘You’ve put her in a red diamante collar topped off with a silver love heart. I don’t like it, but people have said she looks far prettier with it on.’
‘See! Told you so!’
‘And you can do the same. Instead of attracting men that get off on you dressing like a six-year-old for their paedophile, fetish needs, start dressing like a woman. You might, just might attract someone worth having.’
‘Like a cold?’ she replied, unimpressed with his reasoning. ‘Measles? Gonorrhoea.’
‘The last one you could have had with the Swedish rock star who is tone deaf.’
‘I told you about the condoms.’ Maddy tapped her nose. ‘Smart, you see.’ Then she folded her arms and thought hard about what he said. ‘I’d never sleep with a paedophile. That’s just wrong. What happens if they wanted me to wear a nappy and a dummy? Then I’d know they were a dirty kiddie fiddler and I’d report them to the police immediately!’
‘Oh God, Maddy!’ Stan said, putting his head in his hands and starting to laugh. ‘How am I going to cope living with you?’
She realised it sounded like a cry for help.
‘Don’t care.’
Maddy was sitting with Ted in his office talking to his personal assistant. The idea was for him to sort out her travel plans to Rome as he thought he could get a better deal. She wasn’t stupid. He had an ulterior motive and was waiting to find out what it was. ‘I’m perfectly safe travelling on my own.’
‘Why don’t you let me come along?’ Ted asked as she noticed Kylie flash her a jealous glance. ‘It’ll be fun just you and me.’
She was very pretty with white blonde hair, blue eyes, a symmetrical face and a tight figure. Maddy knew she fancied her boss.
That she could sniff out a mile with her acute dog like senses.
‘You might overdose on ice-cream, and I’ll be very worried. What if something goes wrong?’ added Ted, frowning at Maddy. ‘You can’t go alone, and I promised your parents you wouldn’t.’
‘You did what!’ Maddy glared at her friend now blushing. ‘I’m an adult, not a child.’
She noticed Kylie slyly grin after checking out her bright pink dress and matching hair band. Maddy tucked her feet under the chair to hide the patent black flat pumps she was wearing.
‘It’s because I love and care about you. And your parents don’t want you to be alone and get scared in a big city.’
‘Am I hearing this?’ laughed out Maddy. ‘Those same parents that waved me goodbye some few years ago while running for the plane to escape the cold. I don’t mind them worrying, but I won’t be dictated to, no siree!’
Maddy looked at Kylie who was staring at an unbeknown Ted. He was rubbing his hand on his forehead and seemed lost on what to do.
‘Kylie, you must be how old?’ asked Maddy, turning to the young woman.’
‘Twenty-four.’
‘That’s a good age if you don’t mind me saying. Your parents let you travel from New Zealand to this god forsaken land. Did they object or mind?’
‘Well, not really. My grandma lives in Leeds, so I have relatives here.’
‘I see,’ sighed Maddy seeing Ted smile. ‘But you go to Europe for little breaks. Does someone object?’
‘That’s different because I’m going away to have some fun,’ she laughed, fluttering her eyelashes at Ted. ‘And I don’t say.’
‘I see where I’ve been going wrong. I did say, and now it seems I can’t go unless I’m supervised by a so-called adult.’ Then she turned to Ted. ‘You only want to come so you can use me as bait to reel in girls, not that you would so as you’re happily ensconced with Stasia Franks.’ Maddy laughed out hard seeing him blush profusely as she looked at Kylie. ‘I’m not quite sure he’s the marrying type though.’
‘Let’s wait a few weeks and see what happens.’ Ted sat back in the chair and stretched out. ‘You might just want to stay here and celebrate your thirtieth.’
