by Cee, DW
When we got off our thrill rides, I felt punchy and almost skittish from the natural high. “That was so freaking cool! That beats everything we’ve done so far.”
“You’re a speed demon, Princess. I always knew you were a daredevil, but damn, you’re a monster out on the road with a motorcycle. Pick a bike, Princess. I’ll buy you which ever bike you want.”
“Aaahhh!” I screamed. “You know my dream is to buy a Harley, but after test driving this Ducati, I might have changed my mind. But I don’t think I should get a bike, yet. I don’t want you to buy me one.”
“Why not?”
“Because I can’t ride it in London with all that crazy traffic and I eventually will have to take it back to the States. Let’s hold off on getting it. But thank you for the generous offer.” I gave him an innocent kiss on the cheek.
“Where did you learn to ride a bike?”
“A friend from college taught me. He had a Triumph, and I salivated over it enough for him to offer me a ride, and eventually lessons on that bike.”
“He was probably salivating over you.”
“We were just friends.” I corrected him. “Did I tell you Max is getting a Ducati?”
“Doesn’t he already have a bike?”
“He does. He has that beautiful Harley. Remember when Jane asked to talk to me the other night in Florence?”
“Yeah.”
“Well, after we talked about you, she asked me to help her order a bike for Max. I picked out the bike I test-drove today. I can’t wait to hear what Max thinks.”
“Well, I offered you a test drive in exchange for your virginity,” he announced smugly. “Let’s go make good on your offer.”
“How about dinner, first?”
“You better not complain you’re too full to do anything tonight.”
I laughed! “All right. After you feed me, I’ll lay there and let you do whatever you want with me.”
“Deal!”
Dinner was a simple and very quick couple bowls of pasta and a bottle of wine. We were both still coming off the high of the fast rides and eager to get home.
“Donovan?” He looked at me in response. “Would it bother you very much if I called Michael just to make sure he’s OK? I texted him a few times but haven’t gotten a response, and his sister Ruby also hasn’t been responding back to me. It’s really bothering me.”
“If you must...” He didn’t like my request at all. I had considered not asking Donovan, but thought for the good of the relationship, I should ask.
“You know, I’d like to eventually return to being good friends with Michael if he’ll have me as a friend.” Now I was getting the surly face. “Michael and Ruby were incredibly good to me when I landed in England, and they’ve become dear friends. I like them and I like him as a person very much.”
“Just don’t get angry with me when I stay friends with Kate.”
Perhaps I was being a hypocrite, but what he just said pissed me off. “You cannot equate me and Michael with you and Kate!”
“Why not?” Did he really have no idea or was he trying to goad me into a fight?
“Because I wasn’t in love with Michael. I didn’t want to marry him. And I wasn’t with him for ten years!”
“Well, it’s been a long time since I’ve been in love with Kate. It’s also been a long time since I’ve wanted to marry Kate. And I told you, we weren’t together for ten years. Whomever you choose to stay friends with is your choice, but you need to give me the same courtesy.”
“Fine!”
Later, I’d probably think this wasn’t the best idea, but being the hotheaded woman that I was sometimes, I decided to call Michael right here, right then.
“Hello?” He actually answered my call.
“Hi Michael.” I said, with some trepidation. “How are you?”
“All right, and you?”
“A little worried you may yell at me or hang up on me. I was surprised you picked up my call.” I could feel Donovan’s wrath from the other seat so I turned myself around and talked out the window.
“Are you back in London?”
“No. I’m back in Florence but I’ll be back in London tomorrow. Can we meet?” Once again, I was tentative in asking and sitting on very thin ice with Donovan. I could feel the fire emanating from his skin. “Tea at the Berkeley? Your favorite?”
That brought out a small laughter from Michael, which made me feel a thousand times better. “Sure. The hostess should keep our standing reservation, even after one missed tea. Wednesday?”
I smiled. “Wednesday it is. Will you bring Ruby with you? I know she’s mad at me, too, but please tell her I miss her as I’ve missed you.”
And, that was the straw that broke the camel’s back. Donovan grabbed my phone and threw it out of the car and into a flat, empty plot of land in the middle of Tuscany.
“What the hell was that?” I yelled really loudly, really angrily. Donovan and I were both caught off guard by my belligerence. “Why do you keep doing that?”
“Why the fuck are you missing this guy?” Now Donovan was angry. “You really miss him that much? You want me to disappear so you can get back together with him? Is that what you want? Shit, if I’d known how impossible you’d be, I wouldn’t have started this chase. I’ve never had to work so hard for anything in my life and I’m sick of it. Stop playing these fucking games with me.”
I was frozen from his anger, his acrimony, and his accusation. What I thought was one friend missing another friend, Donovan considered inappropriate. What I considered wooing, he considered it a difficult chase. And what I believed was playfulness, he had considered it a mind game. We were on complete opposite spectrums of thought.
Keeping to myself the rest of the ride, we got back to Grandfather’s and I was absolutely lost. I didn’t know what to do, where to go, and to whom I was supposed to turn to for comfort. I could feel my stomach knotting and my chest tingling in pain so I decided to do some work, lest the tears fell.
“I’m going to sleep,” was all Donovan muttered before going upstairs.
I nodded and stared at my laptop.
Half an hour later, I was still staring at the screen, unable to move away from this feeling of abandonment. It was late, but I decided to call my mom from my laptop.
“Hello?”
“Hi Mom.”
“Laney. Where are you, Sweetheart?”
“I’m back in Florence.”
“What are you doing back there?”
“Donovan took me to the Ducati factory and museum and we test drove a Ducati, a Ferrari, and a Lamborghini.”
“That Donovan is spoiling you rotten. He didn’t buy you a motorcycle did he?” Mom never liked the idea of me on that dangerous vehicle.
“He offered, but I didn’t take him up on it.”
“Good! Tell him I don’t approve.”
A weak laugh escaped me. “How long will you be here?”
“As long as you need me. Your dad left already. He needed to get back to the hospital.”
“I know. He called me from the airport.”
“What’s wrong, Honey?”
“Nothing.” I knew Mom was too smart to fall for my lie, but I didn’t want to admit that after all these years of loving a single man, I couldn’t make it work for more than a week.
Mom was silent on her part and waited for me to talk. I didn’t say anything to the contrary.
“What should you and I do before I go back home?” Mom tried to make small talk.
“I’d like to take you to watch a play at the Globe Theatre. I’d also like to see Stonehenge with you. You can make notes of the decor and placement of the rocks.” Mom laughed. “And maybe you and I can visit Scotland and Ireland. I’ll take advantage of your deep pockets and let you pay. Will you schedule those trips for us?”
“Sure. When do you want to go?”
“I’m supposed to meet Michael on Wedn
esday. I’ll see if we can meet Monday, instead. How about if we leave Tuesday?”
“What about Donovan?” Mom treaded lightly. She knew there was something wrong with us. “Your Gram tells me there’s a very important office function on Tuesday. Even she’s attending. Won’t you be attending with him?”
“I don’t think he needs me there.” And I don’t think he wants me there or anywhere else for that matter.
“You sure you’re doing all right?”
“I’m fine, Mom.” I did my best to sound cheerful. “I’ll see you tomorrow?”
“I’ll be here. I love you, Laney.”
“Love you too.”
That conversation did nothing to alter my mood, so this time I called Dad. It was early in Los Angeles, but I knew Dad would be awake.
“Hello?” Dad answered as cheerfully as ever.
“Hi Daddy.”
“Laney! Where is my globe-trotting daughter, now?”
“I’m back in Florence. Are you at the hospital, already?”
“My sweet daughter, I’ve been here since 4:30am, operated on a patient already, and am now enjoying my second cup of coffee.”
I giggled. “Who made your scrambled eggs today?”
“Nobody.” He pretended to be disgruntled. “I need my baby home to scramble my eggs for me.”
“Daddy?”
“Yes, Baby?”
“I think I’ve decided to go to med school.”
“I knew it! You made the right decision, Baby. You’re going to make a phenomenal doctor.”
“I think I want to be a heart surgeon like you and Jake.”
“Damn! You have just made my day. You’re a brilliant girl. You’ll make a fine surgeon.”
“But I’m a little worried, Daddy.”
“What worries you?”
I sighed. “It takes so long to become a surgeon, and I’m already starting a year late. When will I get married and have kids? And how will I raise these kids if I’m working all the time? Although...”
“Although what?”
“Remember how I’ve always told you I didn’t think anyone ever wanted me? How I thought I’d never get married?”
“Yeah...”
“I think my life is a series of self-fulfilled prophecies.”
“If that’s the case, you would have been married to that man of yours since you were ten.” My father laughed. “You’ve always known what you wanted and were determined to work hard for it. Nothing has been handed to you, my sweet child. You are a going to be a great success in life because you are level-headed, logical, and you have your parents’ work ethics. Don’t worry about the future. Be content with the present, Laney.”
“Do you think I should come back home and start med school this year? Should I start it out here? Can you and Jake help me get into a med school here, then transfer back home?”
“If you’re sure you want to start now, come home. There’s nothing keeping you in London anymore. I’ll talk to the dean and get you enrolled.”
“Give me a couple of days to think about it? I’ll let you know soon. Thank you, Daddy.”
“Sweet dreams, Laney.”
“Bye, Daddy. I love you.”
Another conversation done, and I felt a little better, but nothing would take away this sour mood. I wanted to change out of these jeans but doing that would require me to go into the bedroom and I didn’t have the fortitude for that just now. I sat on the couch, streaming a scary movie and sleeping on and off.
As I saw the sun rising, I decided to get off the couch and visit that bakery Max and Jane had been to last time we were here. It was gorgeous outside. The way the sun was hitting the hills in all shades of reds and oranges and yellows, I could stare at the setting all morning. Grabbing some pastries and a cup of coffee, I walked the neighborhood and enjoyed the quiet.
When I finally got back in, Donovan was nowhere to be seen so I left his pastry right by the coffee machine and left him a note saying I was going out for a ride on the Vespa.
When we were last here and I was keeping myself busy before the Bocelli concert, my exploration of the house led me to the garage and the twin Vespas collecting dust. I cleaned off the years of dust on the scooter and went out for a long ride. My conversation with my dad last night was foremost on my mind. Maybe it was a good idea to go back home and to start med school this year. Regardless of what might happen between me and Donovan, I had a life to live and a future to secure. When I got back to my computer, I’d ask my father to help me enroll this year and work my way toward becoming a doctor.
While I was glad to have figured out a major part of my life, somewhere during the ride, I took a wrong turn and kind of got lost. Turning the scooter around, I did my best to backtrack and to remember buildings and signs that I may have passed. Unfortunately, there were no signs anywhere and I was so intent on figuring out my future, I couldn’t remember seeing any buildings along the way. And one olive grove looked the same as all the others, and one vineyard was really no different from the rest.
It was too early for any places to be open, and in reality, there were no shops along this road. It was all farmland. I was screwed. As time passed, a few people came along the road so I asked about the bakery I’d visited this morning. Finally, a local showed me how to get back to the bakery and from there I was able to get back to the villa. I was never so happy to see a familiar place.
“Where the hell have you been?” Donovan lunged at me with his body and wouldn’t let go of me. “I’ve been so worried.”
“I got a little lost.” I didn’t expect this kind of welcome.
“A little lost? You’ve been gone for hours!” He made me wince when he raised his voice. “I thought you had left me, again.”
“I haven’t been gone that long. I don’t know...I thought I was riding straight and was going to come back the same way, but I must have turned somewhere and all the roads look the same and...”
“Don’t leave me again, Delaney.” He implored while still holding me. “I’m sorry I was such an asshole last night. It puts me in a shit mood when I think about you having shared your affection with another man. If I had admitted to myself that I was in love with you before you left, you would never have been with Michael. It drives me insane whenever I think of my mistake.”
I pulled away and looked at this man whose expression was broken. Weaving my fingers through his unruly hair, I smiled thinking of the last time I did this back at Jake’s house while Donovan was sleeping. It was back then that I had wished him a happy life with another woman. “Maybe you were right, Donovan. This,” I pointed to me and him, “was all a thrill of the chase for you. You may think otherwise, but I’ve never played games with you because I know I’ll always lose, and losing hurts.” I pushed away the falling tears with my hand. “As much as I dreamed you to be the perfect man for me, I don’t think I’m the perfect girl for you. You don’t have to try and make this work with me. I know Jake and my family, as well as your parents have pushed you to come find me. It may hurt for a while, but I’ll be all right without you. Go and find your special lady.” No matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t stop crying because I knew deep in my heart, Donovan would be my one and only special man. There would be no other.
“Are you done?” he asked with a silly grin. With tears still falling, I nodded yes. “You are not getting away from me that easily. You may be all right without me, but I won’t be all right without you. You are my one and only special lady, and you’re not the only one who hurts when things go wrong. I love you, Delaney Reid. That’s not going to change, no matter your melo mood and speech.”
As usual, Donovan had me laughing and crying at the same time. “So what are you trying to say?” Like I didn’t know...
“I love you. I know you’re not playing games with me, though it’s still a riddle why you won’t marry me. Even if it takes an eternity, I’ll win your hand and make beautiful babies with yo
u.”
“I might be too old to have kids if it’s going to take you an eternity to get this right,” I joked.
“Then we’ll just have them out of wedlock,” he joked right back. “Princess. Let’s not fight. And if we do, let’s resolve it immediately. I was so miserable last night without you. I kept waiting for you to come up so I could apologize but you never came up, and like a moron, I fell asleep. When I woke up this morning, I was a little crazed I couldn’t find you.”
“I left you a note.”
“I read it but didn’t know what to think when you didn’t come back for this long.”
“Where would I go?”
“Who the hell knows? Last time you left, I was minding my own business, trying to make a living when you disappeared on me.”
“It wasn’t that dramatic.”
“Tell me, Princess. Why did you leave without saying good-bye the first time?”
“I tried to say good-bye and to confess my heart to you but you didn’t come to me. I stayed up all night waiting for you on my swing...again.” The tears came back. “And when I saw you at your office, Grandfather kept urging me to tell you how I felt and I couldn’t stay there any longer without breaking down, so I left abruptly.”
“That night...” At this point, Donovan led me by the hand and took me over to the sofa so we could finish our conversation. “Every fucking thing that could have gone wrong that night went wrong. Let me explain.”
“Can I have you hold that thought while I get another cup of coffee? It was cold riding so early in the morning.”
“Stay here. I’ll get it for you.”
“Latte...”
“Half the milk, no sugar. I know.” He kissed me lightly and went to be my barista.
“This is perfect!” I said after the first sip. “OK. Tell me what happened after our epic date at the sushi bar where I got more gifts in one night than a girl could ever dream. You know, I slept with your necklace on every night and the jewelry case used to sit on the pillow next to me.”
