by A. E. Rayne
He talked about Mirella a lot, Ulrick realised, seeing a spark of desire in Tarl Brava’s dark eyes whenever he spoke of the dreamer. Ulrick frowned, thinking of Lotta, who was most definitely a dreamer like her grandmother. And what was Mirella going to do with her? Now that she had her...
Shaking his head, he tried to stop thinking about those things he couldn’t control. He was heading into who-knew-what, with a lord he had to impress, and a wife he wanted to return home to.
Lotta wasn’t his.
She was gone.
And now he had to focus on making a new future for him and Bergit.
One without any children in it.
Mirella was struggling for words.
After all this time, she didn’t know what to say.
Alys had so many questions, but she didn’t know where to begin.
They walked away from the hall and Arnon without looking back.
‘It’s colder than the South, don’t you think?’ Mirella said, feeling foolish to be discussing the weather.
‘Yes.’
Her mother was walking beside her.
Not dead.
Alys was twenty-eight years old, but she felt like a small girl. Like Lotta. And tears blurring her eyes, she turned to Mirella. ‘Why did you leave me with my grandparents?’ She stopped, not wanting to endure another moment without knowing the truth. ‘For all those years? Why?’
Mirella had rehearsed this moment many times, eventually deciding that it would never come. Not like this, at least. But Alari had forced her hand. ‘It was safer for you. I had to keep you safe.’
‘From my father? You thought he’d hurt me? Why?’
Mirella sighed. She hated talking about Jesper, relieved that Alys barely looked like him. ‘There were no daughters allowed. In four hundred years of Vettel rule, not one daughter lived. And though there were rumours about ill-luck and the will of the gods, it was very much by design.’ It was too cold to stand still, so, legs aching, Mirella urged Alys on. They turned down a narrow street that protected them from the worst of the wind, but it suddenly grew dark as rows of houses crowded them from both sides.
‘I don’t understand.’
‘The Vettels had the babies killed. If they were girls, they were killed. Barely a breath would escape their tiny lungs before they were suffocated, sometimes drowned.’ Mirella spoke without feeling, though the memories were still strong. ‘As soon as I became pregnant, I ran away. I knew you would come. I wanted you, I did, but I had to get away to save your life.’
Alys felt sick. ‘You thought my father would have killed me? Was he that sort of man?’
‘To have killed you? No, he wasn’t. He would have had someone else do it. His brother, his father, they would have happily tossed your body onto the midden pit themselves, but Jesper wasn’t like that. He wouldn’t have wanted to get his hands dirty.’
Mirella’s disdain for her father was palpable, confusing Alys further. ‘But you went back to him? Raised Hakon and Ivan with him?’
‘I did. I couldn’t be without him.’ Mirella felt no shame. It was the truth.
Once, she had been weak.
Once...
‘Though, in the end, I saw what would come for Jesper and the boys. I didn’t want to be part of it anymore, so I left again. This time for good.’
‘And you came here?’ Alys wanted to stop walking. She wanted to stare into her mother’s eyes, but Mirella showed no sign of slowing down. She walked quickly, stiffly, her eyes focused ahead, never looking Alys’ way.
‘I did.’ Mirella wouldn’t reveal everything, for it served no purpose. Her daughter was a dreamer, but she knew very little, and everything Mirella wanted to keep hidden was warded with symbols that few dreamers would know. ‘I never looked back. Never thought of returning. My time with the Vettels was done. And now, so are they.’
Alys felt strange. ‘But after Jesper died? You didn’t think to come for me? To tell me that you were alive? To meet your grandchildren?’
‘Why? To drag the past out of its dust-covered chest? Where it had lain hidden all these years? You had your own life, Alys. You knew what you knew, and yes, I thought it best if things stayed that way.’
Alys grabbed her mother’s arm, making her stop. ‘You should have come for me.’
Mirella was surprised, staring closely at her daughter for the first time. She was quite beautiful. Delicate. But there was strength in her hand and a determination in her eyes that surprised her.
‘I deserved to know the truth about who I was. It was never up to my grandparents to tell me. It was up to you. You should have come when Jesper died. I was in no danger then. From Hakon?’ She shook her head. ‘No, I don’t believe he would have cared.’
Mirella removed Alys’ hand. ‘You are a mother, so you know that you make the best decisions you can. You stayed with Arnon, though you feared that your children were in danger, especially Magnus. We make the best decisions we can, though perhaps our children won’t always appreciate them.’
Alys blinked, her mother’s words piercing her heart.
And then Mirella was walking again, and she was forced to hurry after her. ‘Then why now? Why is Lotta here? Why am I here? It’s no accident, is it? Not a coincidence?’
‘All roads lead somewhere, that is true. The Goddesses of Fate have a plan for each of us, and sometimes, they weave their threads together to confuse us all. Even dreamers.’
That wasn’t an answer, and now they were at a crossroads where children were screaming and laughing as the wind threatened to blow them over. Some fell, tumbling away. Others slid on the ice, just managing to hold themselves up, enjoying the game.
Mirella turned to Alys, her eyes empty of all emotion. ‘You are here now, Lotta and Magnus too, and whatever has happened in the past, we have a chance to begin again. We can start a new life together. Orvala is just the beginning. The North is no place to live, but once Tarl Brava takes the throne –’
‘What?’ Alys shook her head. ‘No, I don’t want that. I don’t want that for my children either. No! You’re supporting another man to steal the throne?’
‘Supporting? Of course, for Tarl Brava is fated to become the high king. It was written on the Bear Stone, two thousand years ago when Eutresia fell. It is not my place to deny fate. That is not a dreamer’s way. We work with fate, not against it.’
Alys could feel her boots slipping on the street, the wind a furious roar now, drilling into her ears. She remembered Thenor talking to her in Slussfall’s square.
A war was coming, he’d warned. He wanted her on his side.
Against who?
‘Thenor supports Ake on the throne,’ she said. ‘He ended the Vettels’ quest for power.’
Mirella’s lips tightened, almost disappearing. ‘Yes, I know all about Thenor. But his time is ending, Alys, know that. If you choose that doomed god’s side, you will not survive what is coming, I promise you. And I would know, for I have seen more than even Thenor himself.’
‘You’re quiet,’ Jonas murmured, not wanting to spook Eddeth, who looked as though she was almost falling asleep on her grey mare. The horse was plodding along at a miserly pace, barely blowing out a breath, head low, looking just as sleepy as her rider. ‘What can you see?’
Eddeth glanced around, not wanting to reveal her fears to everyone. ‘More than I want to.’
‘Oh?’
‘Something’s out there.’ She leaned towards Jonas. ‘Can you feel it?’
Jonas shrugged, lowering his voice. ‘I’m not sure what I feel, Eddeth, but something’s odd, you’re right.’
‘Mmmm, and after being captured once already, I don’t plan on being caught again.’
Jonas nudged his horse closer, sensing Ollo’s interest in their conversation. He rode ahead with Stina and Ludo, though he kept turning around with raised eyebrows wanting to know what everyone was talking about. ‘Who would be out there?’
‘Who?’ Eddeth shrugged. ‘We’re in the
North, so only enemies. No friends are out there, I’d say.’
Likely that was true, and Jonas sighed, not wanting any more trouble. ‘I’ll talk to Vik. Maybe he’ll have a clue about where we are?’
Eddeth’s eyes twinkled brightly, watching Vik, who rode just behind Ollo. ‘He’s a smart man. A wise man.’
‘He is,’ Jonas agreed, hoping Vik could see where they were, for surely it would give them a clue as to who might be lurking nearby.
Vik’s ears were open, hearing Jonas and Eddeth muttering to each other, trying to ignore Ollo grumbling ahead of him. Ludo and Stina didn’t appear to notice as they kept their heads together, talking away.
Sigurd wrinkled his nose. ‘Wish the wind would change course. Or maybe I should move Ollo behind us?’
Vik laughed, his stomach gurgling ominously. Whatever that Elfa woman had put in the ale was still lingering, and he was looking forward to stopping for the night.
Sigurd grinned, then froze, staring at Vik’s face. ‘What?’
‘Smoke.’ Vik twisted in the saddle, holding up a hand.
Watching him, Ollo pulled up abruptly, Sigurd nearly running his horse into Destroyer’s rump.
Vik pointed north, then drew a finger to his lips, listening, watching Frostbite’s ears. They were twitching, swivelling, his nostrils working hard. The horse could hear something. Smell something too. And dismounting, Vik waited for the rest of the men and the two women to join them.
‘What is it?’ Ollo wanted to know. ‘Who is it?’ He could smell the smoke too.
‘Only one way to find out,’ Vik decided. ‘Who’s coming with me?’
Mirella took Alys back to the hall.
Their return journey was mostly silent, neither woman knowing what else to say. They were on different sides, that much was obvious, and Alys began to wonder what Mirella intended to do with her and the children. Then she thought of Lotta, and her heart lifted.
They mounted the steps, Mirella moving ahead of her. ‘I’ll have Lotta brought down. You may make yourself at home by the fire. By the sound of those chattering teeth, you need to warm up.’ After raising Hakon and Ivan, mothering came naturally to Mirella, though she felt no warmth towards the woman who was her daughter. They were strangers, their interaction awkward, though it didn’t bother her. She thought about what needed doing, and what she was trying to achieve, knowing that everything was merely functional, helping her reach her goals. ‘Magnus will be inside, waiting for you.’
‘And Arnon?’ Alys glanced over her shoulder, though she saw no sign of her husband.
‘He will not trouble you.’
Alys frowned, doubting that was true, but she followed Mirella up the steps, into the hall, happy to see Magnus in his new warm cloak.
‘Mother!’ he ran forward, slipping his arms around her waist, his eyes briefly on the woman who swept past him with barely a glance. ‘What’s happening? Who’s that?’
Alys held on tightly, not sure what to say; not sure she could even stomach the truth. The distasteful revelations about her father, and now, her mother, were almost too much to take in. ‘Your grandmother,’ she whispered, eventually, not wanting to keep secrets anymore. ‘That is your grandmother.’
Jonas thought of Magnus, smiling as he stared into the trees. If Magnus was with them, he would have wanted to go with Vik and Sigurd because he’d wanted to go with Vik and Sigurd.
Though someone needed to keep an eye on everyone else.
Stina looked nervous as she shivered by Eddeth and Aldo, all three of them watching the trees. Their horses were tied up behind them now, enjoying the break, looking for food. ‘What do you think’s out there?’ she hissed. ‘I hope it’s not the vatyr.’
‘During the day?’ Eddeth snorted. ‘Not likely!’
Jonas turned around with a frown, finger to his lips. ‘Ssshhh.’
Eddeth nodded, longing for a pair of gloves. She rubbed her frozen hands together, blowing hard. ‘No, I don’t think it’s evil spirits.’
Stina watched her. ‘But what do you feel, Eddeth? What do you see? Why not close your eyes and try to find something?’ It was one way to keep Eddeth quiet, she thought, and Eddeth seemed happy to help. So leading her to a log, where she brushed off the snow, Stina encouraged her to sit down. ‘I’ll stay with you.’
Eddeth’s nerves were pinging as she took a seat. ‘Good! I don’t want to be left behind if something’s coming to kill us all!’
Stina swallowed, glancing over her shoulder at Jonas and Aldo, who’d been joined by Ollo and a handful of the crew now. ‘Don’t worry, Eddeth, I won’t leave you behind.’
Vik moved stealthily, hood low over his face, careful not to make any noise, though the snow was so deep that it was mostly impossible to know what was lurking beneath it. Sigurd followed him silently, knowing Vik’s reputation as a man of the wild. Vik had trekked across Alekka on his own for years, though even with that experience and knowledge, he didn’t appear to know where they were. Sigurd didn’t blame him. It was like being stuck in a bucket of snow, hard to discern much of anything.
Trees rose out of the white terrain, mostly thin birch, leafless and silvery, as they crept further into the forest, crouching over, hearing more noises now.
Vik held up a hand, dropping to the ground, and crawling on his belly, he crept up a hillock overlooking a frozen stream. Sigurd followed him, mouth dropping open as he took in what appeared to be the sprawling camp of an army.
Vik swallowed, trying to see any sign of who they were. There were tents, horses, men gathered around fires. He smelled smoke, and fish cooking, and his belly groaned inconveniently. Sigurd glared at him, and Vik shrugged, sliding back down the hillock. ‘Need to see who they are,’ he whispered.
‘Enemies,’ Sigurd whispered back. ‘We just need to go around them.’
Vik agreed, but they needed to understand the contours of the camp to do so. ‘I’ll go this way,’ he murmured, pointing left. ‘You go right. See how best to go around. We don’t want to stumble into their path. And we’ll need to move quickly if they’re looking to go our way.’
Sigurd nodded, his heart skipping about wildly. They’d had enough bad luck already, and he didn’t feel like any more. So, trying to still his own panic, he edged away from Vik, moving to the right, slithering across the snow like a snake, not daring to lift up his head.
Vik watched him go before moving to the left, hoping the army wasn’t in any hurry to move on. Some horses were drinking from holes smashed into the frozen stream, though they didn’t appear to be stopping for a short break, Vik realised, smelling those fires again, seeing more tents.
It was definitely a camp.
But whose?
24
Alys kept turning around, remembering what her grandfather had taught her about having eyes on every door, on every approach an enemy could make. And blinking, Alys realised that she now had more enemies than she could count.
She supported Ake, her grandfather, and Reinar.
The Lord of Orvala wanted to kill them all, and now her mother?
Magnus remained confused by her side, enjoying the warmth of the hall. ‘What will happen to Father?’
That was a good question.
‘Can we kill him? I want to kill him.’
Alys stopped looking around the hall, staring down at her son. ‘Your father wasn’t the best choice, I know, though the Goddesses of Fate often lead us down a dark path, knowing that if we look hard enough, we’ll find what made it all worthwhile.’ She pulled Magnus close, feeling his tension. ‘Which is you. You and Lotta. No matter what’s happened or what your father does now, I’ll never regret having you and your sister. Not once. Never.’
Magnus didn’t want to cry, but he did. He couldn’t help it. He wanted to go home, though he was struggling to even know where that was anymore. ‘Will we go to Ottby? When it’s over? Will we go there?’
Alys froze, wondering why he’d asked that. ‘I... I don’t know where we�
��ll go. Not to Ullaberg. Somewhere with Stina. We need to find Stina, don’t we?’
‘Do you think she’s coming to find us? That the Vilanders will come and save us? I think they should after what they did to you!’
Alys laughed. ‘Well, I know Jonas is trying to. And Vik. I’ve seen them in my dreams. And in the meantime, we just have to stay safe here. Find out what Mirella wants.’
‘Is that her name? Mirella?’
Alys nodded.
‘And is she bad?’
‘I don’t know what she is, Magnus. Maybe she’ll keep us safe from Arnon, but I don’t know what she truly wants.’ And looking up as Mirella emerged from the corridor, Alys froze, holding her breath.
Lotta.
Lotta slipped out from behind her grandmother’s cloak, trembling, watching her, and Alys’ eyes filled with tears, her shoulders dropping. The relief was so great that she started to sob. ‘Lotta!’ she cried as her daughter ran to her. ‘My baby!’
‘Mama! Mama! I missed you so much! Mama!’
Alys cried until she couldn’t see, but she didn’t need to. She could feel her daughter in her arms, and she squeezed her tightly; Magnus beside her now, his arms gripping them both, sobbing just as hard.
‘Magnus!’ And seeing him, Lotta broke away from her mother, hugging her brother. ‘You’re alright! I wanted to help you, I wanted to, but...I...’ Nose blocking, head hurting, Lotta couldn’t speak.
‘You saw what would happen, didn’t you? You saw your father?’
Lotta nodded, back in her mother’s arms again, holding on tightly, not wanting Mirella to take her away. Not wanting anyone to ever take her away from her mother again. ‘Where is he?’ She looked around suddenly, panicking.
‘Not in here,’ Mirella said coldly, watching the family reunion from a distance, discomfort in her eyes. ‘And nor will he be. Not yet, at least.’
