by Laura John
“I want to try to rim you. Is that okay?” he asks, like a timid boy.
I try not to chuckle, but he’s so damn cute. “Try whatever you want. Let me be your experiment.”
I love that he wants to do this with me. That we are connected so much that he wants to try new things. How did I get so lucky to get a man like this?
He nods and kisses his way down my body. When he gets to my hip bone, he lifts both my legs, placing them on his shoulders. He gives one long lick up my crack, and damn, it feels good.
I want him to shove his tongue inside me, but I won’t pressure him to do anything. I want him to gain confidence at his own pace. He continues to kiss and lick me, and fuck, I want more. His tongue slips slowly inside me, and holy hell, he’s a natural at this.
“Are you sure you’ve never done this?” I ask, panting.
He chuckles but goes back to kissing and licking and making me ready to explode.
I hear him grab the bottle of lube and cold shaky fingers touch my hole. I am so ready for him. So fucking slowly, I think I’m going to die, he inserts one finger. He moves it around, exploring my body. He pushes it in and pulls it out, twisting, moving, feeling.
Gaining more confidence, he adds a second and third finger in. The pain and pleasure all mix together and I’m riding the high that Mason is providing. After a little bit of exploration, he finds my prostate and starts to stroke it.
“Fuck,” I hiss through clenched teeth.
He chuckles and stops for a minute. “I figure since you often talk about how big my cock is, I might need to stretch you,” he says. He kisses my foot and pushes a fourth finger into me.
I moan, tilting my head back and closing my eyes. It feels so good. So full. But I want more. I want all of him. I wonder if he’d be interested in shoving his fist in me, showing me how dirty he is.
“One day, I bet your greedy hole will take my whole fist,” he whispers like he is reading my mind. Yes! Fuck, yes, I want that. Right now, though, I just need him. Anything he’ll give, I’ll take.
“Fuck me... please,” I pant. I watch him pick up the speed with his fingers, stroking my prostate again.
He smiles and pulls his fingers out, leaving me feeling empty but excited about what’s coming. He reaches for a condom and sheaths himself. His eyes lock with mine as he pours more lube into his hand and spreads it over his cock. It’s so damn hot. I can see the lust reflecting back at me.
With one hand on his cock and the other on my leg, he slowly pushes into me. I gasp. Fuck, I knew he was big, much bigger than anyone I have been with, but I didn’t expect him to stretch me so much. The feeling is addictive.
“Is this okay?” he asks, and I nod. Nothing has ever felt so right.
“Keep going. It feels so good. I want to feel you lose control. Fuck me, Mason. The way you’ve always wanted to fuck a man. Use me. Show me what you got.”
He thrusts his hips and his cock is fully inside of me. Wrapping my legs around his waist, he leans down and kisses me. I wasn’t expecting this intimacy.
“I don’t want to fuck you, Xavier. I want to make love to you.”
I’m taken back by the tenderness and honesty in his eyes while he gives me a chance to adjust to his girth. Then he starts to move. And I lose all thoughts. His thrusts are slow but firm, and they make my heart flip. I feel treasured in a way I never have been by a lover before; I wasn’t expecting this tonight.
We continue to make out, our tongues dancing, as he pumps in and out of me.
“More,” I whine, “I need more, Mason. Please!” I don’t recognize my own voice.
He smiles and complies. He stands back up and starts to fuck me, hard and fast.
“Yes, Mason. Yes!” I scream. I’m ready to come again. And by the look on Mason’s face, he’s close too.
“Come with me,” he grunts. He grabs my cock and pumps his fist up and down it.
We both let out growls as we come, my semen coating his hand and my stomach. He collapses on top of me and kisses me again. We are both covered in sweat and out of breath.
“That was the hottest sex of my life,” I tell him honestly.
And he gives me a shy smile, pressing up gently onto his elbows, still inside of me.
“Yeah, that was amazing. I never knew it could be like that. I’m so happy I found you and that we are trying this. You’re really amazing.”
Shit, my heart is going to beat out of my chest. No one’s ever spoken to me like that before. I know that I wasn’t looking for anything serious before Mason, but I had no idea that I was missing out on moments like this. Would it have been this way with someone else? Or was I waiting for Mason for a reason? I place my hands on his face and give him a gentle kiss.
Slowly, he pulls out of me and we both get cleaned up in the shower. We take turns soaping each other up before we climb into bed for cuddles.
“I hate that I’m going to be gone for a week,” I admit, playing with Mason’s chest hair. “I’ve never been in a committed relationship while on the road.”
Mason runs his fingers through my hair, and I almost purr. It feels so good.
“I don’t mean to come across as insecure, but do you often sleep with a lot of people when you are on the road? Is it going to be difficult to not sleep with anyone?” he asks, biting his lip and staring at the ceiling.
I place a kiss on his chest. “I understand your insecurities, but if I say I’m going to do something, I do it. I promise that you are the only one I will be with. Will I be horny as fuck? Fuck yeah, but I’ll just call you late at night and we can figure it out. I’m not a cheater.”
He kisses the top of my head and nods.
“Thank you. I feel like an asshole even thinking about it, but I know this is new for both of us, and I just want to be on the same page.”
“Honesty is the most important part of a relationship, but especially when your partner’s on the road a lot. I’ll give you a heads up now, social media is a bitch. I’m sure you’ve seen it with your friends, but stuff gets blown out of proportion. So I need you to trust me and always come to me if you feel like something is off. There have been so many headlines saying I’m sleeping with someone who is a friend or a fan I met once.”
“Yeah, I hate the paparazzi,” he says, resuming playing with my hair. “They have almost ended so many relationships I know. I wish people would just mind their own goddamn business. But I promise I’ll talk with you if I’m feeling insecure. And besides, my brother-in-law is on your team. He’ll tell me if you’re fucking around, and you bet he’ll punch your face in.”
I laugh and nod. “Yeah, I definitely don’t want a fight with him. He would be fucking my face up for sure.”
After that, we both drift off to sleep. Me with my head on his chest and him with his arm around me.
Life feels perfect.
“I’m pathetic,” I whine and pout at Mason through the video chat on my phone.
“Why are you pathetic?” he asks with a gorgeous smile.
“Because I’ve only been away from you for four days, and I miss you. I know our relationship is still brand new, but I really like you, Mason.”
His smile grows even more. “I really like you, too. Only four more days and we’ll be in the same bed together.” He pauses for a moment and looks down. “I mean, if that’s what you want.”
I laugh because we are both acting like teenage boys. “Of course, that’s what I want. I want to be in the same bed as you every night that I’m home. A week away feels like forever. This is supposed to be the time of our relationship that we get to know each other. Explore each other’s bodies. Instead, I’m in a hotel room a million miles away from you.”
“You are doing what you were made for—being a badass on the baseball diamond. It sucks being away, and I do miss you, but I know you are doing what you love. And I’m so proud of you! You played amazing tonight.”
“You watched?” I ask, and he shakes his head with a smile. Damn, he�
�s gorgeous.
“Of course, I fucking watched. I’m a huge baseball fan, and now my boyfriend is an MLB player. It would be rude of me not to watch.”
“I love your smile,” I admit. I wonder if it’s always been this bright, or did I play a part in bringing it out of him?
“Thanks. Leah made a similar comment yesterday when I went to visit. She said it has been dim for a while, but now it’s back and bright. I also told her I have a boyfriend, but I didn’t tell her who, just that I was going to bring him to family brunch next week. Is that okay? I know we talked about it before, but I still feel like I’m springing this on you. I should have asked you first, eh?” he blurts the words, his eyes going wide.
Damn, he’s cute when he’s nervous.
“Calm down. That’s absolutely okay. It really sucks not being able to tell Johnny I’m dating you since he’s the one I’m the closest to on the team. It’s nice seeing you coming out of your shell more.”
He presses his lips together and then smiles again. “It feels great to finally embrace who I actually am. I didn’t realize how much hate I had towards myself, and how depressing my life had become.”
I take a deep breath. His confession hits me right in the heart. After working with so many young gay kids, I’ve heard the words a lot, but hearing them from my boyfriend hits a new chord.
“It’s freeing, isn’t it? Just accepting yourself and saying ‘fuck you’ to the world.”
He nods and a yawn slips from his mouth.
“You need to go to bed, babe. We can talk tomorrow.”
“I’m sorry, I wanted to be able to talk longer, but I am exhausted. I’ve been going since five this morning and have another early morning tomorrow.”
“Go. I—” I pause because for some reason ‘I love you’ almost rolled out of my lips. “Good night,” I finally say and end the call after he responds.
We’ve been dating a couple of weeks and I almost said ‘I love you’? Is it because I don’t talk to a lot of people on the phone and it’s an instant response? Or is it because I’m actually developing deeper feelings than I even realized?
Fuck, I miss him.
“I don’t think I can do this,” I admit, a cold sweat forming on my brow.
Xavier reaches over and places his hand on my knee.
“They already know you’re gay. This isn’t that big of a deal,” he tells me, and I shake my head as I merge into the left lane to take the exit to my sister’s house.
“You don’t understand. I’ve only ever brought one girl here, and that was Meadow. This is a big deal.”
“I know, babe. I’m sorry for saying it wasn’t. But I promise you, it’s going to be fine. The only thing that’s going to happen is that Johnny’s going to threaten to tear my balls out if I hurt you. He also might threaten to do the same to you if I lose a game because I’m heartbroken.”
I take a deep breath and smile. He’s right. He’s totally right.
“Okay, let’s go introduce you as my boyfriend.”
After a few minutes of silence, we finally arrive at the house, and I’m frozen in place. A million feelings hit me all at once. What if I was wrong? What if this goes to hell in a handbasket?
My heart is racing like crazy and I feel like I’m going to throw up.
“I’ve got you,” Xavier whispers, squeezing my hand before getting out of my car. His touch instantly calms me.
I take another deep breath and exit, grabbing Xavier’s hand on the way to the door.
“Don’t you knock?” Xavier asks when I open the door, and I chuckle.
“Nope. Sibling rules. If she doesn’t want me to walk in, she better lock the door.”
He laughs with me, and a sense of ease rushes over me.
We walk out to the backyard and Leah covers her mouth, eyes wide, when she sees Xavier and I hand in hand. Shit. I should turn around and go back. This was a bad idea. Abort mission abort mission.
“So, this is the guy you were trying to land,” Johnny says to Xavier with a lifted brow.
“Yeah, I’m so lucky he saw past my dumbass ways and is giving us a chance.”
Leah throws her arms around me. “I’m so happy for you,” she whispers into my ear.
“I’m happy too.” I smile at her, feeling a weight lift off my shoulders.
“I’m not going to go through the spiel about breaking his heart because you should know I’m not afraid to kill someone,” Johnny says with a straight face to Xavier and his face whitens a little.
Leah and I start to laugh, and Xavier relaxes a little.
“I promise to try my hardest not to break his heart. I’m really happy with him; I don’t ever want to fuck that up,” Xavier replies, wrapping an arm around my shoulders.
“Well, now that you’ve introduced us to your boyfriend, let’s eat!” Johnny says and moves past us to go dish up.
“That went really well.” I smile at Xavier.
“Why wouldn’t it? Your family loves you.”
I nod. “I guess a part of me thought they were just saying they supported me, but when I brought an actual boyfriend, they would start singing a different tune.”
Xavier leans down and places a gentle kiss on my lips, calming me.
“You know that’s just silly. Your sister loves you; she just wants your happiness.”
“I know that now. I’m sorry for being so insecure.” I want to be more confident for Xavier, sometimes it’s just hard. I wish changing was like flipping on a switch, but it’s never that easy.
“Don’t be sorry, babe. You’re processing a lot of changes in your life. But you’re doing a great job and I’m so proud of you,” he tells me. His face is soft and there’s a look of adoration in his eyes.
A bubble of happiness forms in my chest that he’s actually proud of me.
“Let’s go eat,” I tell him, tugging him to the table with food. “You kept me up late last night and I’m starving.”
He chuckles but follows me.
“Kick ass today!” I tell Xavier before kissing him, hard.
I trace the seam of his lips with my tongue, and he opens for me. I will never get sick of kissing this man.
As weird as it may sound, I really can see a future with him. The past two weeks have been like a dream. And every day I keep thinking to myself, why didn’t I come out sooner? But maybe it wouldn’t have been like this before. Maybe I was meant to meet Xavier. Maybe he’s my soulmate.
I don’t know for sure, but I’ve never been happier. I just wish Dad could be here to see it. I know deep down he would have supported me too. You know, after slapping me upside the head for being a dumbass.
Unfortunately, there is still a lingering doubt in my head that keeps thinking he’d be slightly disappointed if I don’t make partner.
“I promise to play my heart out, if you promise to be the loudest one cheering for me.”
I smile. “Damn right, babe.”
I kiss him again and sigh, knowing I won’t be seeing him in person until late tonight.
“It’s so nice seeing you happy,” Leah says walking up beside me.
“It feels nice being happy. I didn’t even realize that I wasn’t that happy. I just thought that’s how life is. I’m really glad Xavier came into my life.”
She wraps me in her arms, and I hold her tight for a few moments, relishing in the love that radiates from her.
“I love you, Mason; I want your happiness, no matter what.”
I nod, a tear forming in my eye, and I quickly brush it away.
“I’m so sorry I kept everything from you for so long. It will never happen again. I’m your brother, and I’m going to start acting like it again.”
“Come on, let’s go inside. Eddie wants to play horsey, and I told him his Uncy MayMay would love to.”
I laugh and follow her in. I guess I’m going to be a horse for a two-year-old for a little while.
“You are too fucking hot when you play,” I tell Xavier when he opens t
he door. I smash my lips to his and push him against the wall.
“And you’re fucking hot when you take charge like this,” he says when we come up for air.
I shake my head and lean down to kiss his neck. Xavier moans as I nip and suck and lick.
“I’ve had you every night this week, and I still can’t get enough of you,” I tell him before stepping back and taking a breath. “But I have plans for our date tonight, and if we don’t get out of here, our entire date will be spent in the bedroom. Which I wouldn’t mind, but then all my hard work would be thrown away and we wouldn’t want that, would we?” I ask with a fake pout.
He smiles and shakes his head, grabbing for his coat.
I’m really excited to show him what I’ve spent most of the day planning. I really hope he likes it.
“Where are we going?”
He’s been asking since I told him this morning, but I still won’t tell him. Instead, I grab his hand and pull him out the door.
We drive for a while out of the city and Xavier keeps looking at me. I know he’s wondering where we are going. Just a little further now, almost there.
“I don’t own this place, but I know the owner, so don’t be worried,” I tell him as we pull up to a dark forested area. The moon is out, but you can’t see too deep into the woods. Good thing I know exactly where we are going.
“It’s midnight, Mason. Should we really be out in the middle of nowhere?” he asks, looking worried, and I laugh.
“It will be fine,” I tell him and get out of the car. I open the back door and grab a basket and two lanterns. “Take this one,” I tell him, handing him a lantern. I laugh at his look. “You really are a city boy, aren’t you?”
“Yes, I don’t do the woods. Are you sure we aren’t going to be eaten alive by a wolf?”
I laugh, loving that I get to show him something new. “I promise, babe, this is going to be a great night.”
We walk along a path that leads to a beautiful lake. The full moon is shining brightly, reflecting off the water. We almost don’t need the lanterns.
