Knight's Absolution (Knights of Hell Book 5)

by Sherilee Gray

  Ever since, the strange sensations that moved through her body had increased, intensified.

  She didn’t want to believe it, but she was almost positive that what she was experiencing were other emotions awakening inside her. Why now? And how the hell could she stop it?

  How would she do this, live this, if she felt every moment of it?

  The anger inside her increased, making her shake. Sir had been keeping her hungry since he let her out, only feeding her a small amount, then shoving her away—until tonight.

  Now his blood was working its way through her body—strengthening her and weakening her at the same time. She slapped her hand over her mouth when it tried to climb back up her throat. Somehow, she managed to hold it down, breathing through her nose as its toxic roots reached out, taking hold of her, mutating her power into something it should have never been. Making her his weapon.

  His creature.

  She didn’t know what type of blood her kind usually fed on, but she was certain it wasn’t demon. She knew little about her people, but surely feeding should sustain you, not make you impossibly ill.

  Sir’s hold relaxed, and she managed to ease away from him a little, cringing when she felt another rush of liquid between her thighs. Using the sheet, she wiped it away. As usual, she’d been too starved, too focused on drinking to pay attention to the way he’d taken his payment from her body.

  The same way he’d been doing since she was sixteen.

  In movies and when she’d occasionally seen the demons around them have sex, they seemed to enjoy it, to take pleasure from each other’s bodies. Luna couldn’t comprehend it. She didn’t know what pleasure was. Humans, demons, others felt it, but it was a mystery to her.

  It was as if she’d been physically and emotionally switched off. And she was thankful for that. If she regained more human emotions now—

  She didn’t want to think what that would mean for her.

  Right now, the only things she knew, that she understood, was anger—and hunger—the kind that came with pain, like the agony she’d experienced during her two-week stay in the basement.

  Sir usually only wanted her body for sex when she fed from him. He said he had no choice. More often than not, that meant once a week, since that was all the feeding he allowed her to have. But since he’d only been feeding her a little at a time until tonight, she’d had to endure his attentions several times this week.

  With a groan, he rolled to his back, releasing her hair completely.

  She should stay where she was, but she couldn’t bear it another moment and slid from the bed, rushing to the bathroom to quickly clean up—something he didn’t permit. He wanted his scent on her, wanted all the other demons in his army to know she was his.

  When she walked back into the bedroom, it was dark and quiet, apart from Sir’s deep, slow breathing. She took in his still form.

  It would be so easy to kill him. To get a knife and do what Grace taught her. The other female had helped her dispatch a demon the first time they met. If only she knew where Ronan was being kept—

  A prickle of something lifted the hair at the back of her neck.

  Luna froze.

  It came again, but stronger this time. So much so, she grabbed onto the doorframe.

  The sensation running through her body, she recognized it immediately. Only this time it was stronger than ever before.

  He was here.

  Gunner.

  Luna rushed to the window and looked outside.

  He was right there on the front lawn. So close.

  Her heart began to beat faster and her hands grew clammy and sweaty and there was this strange fluttering in her stomach.

  What was he doing here? He stood with one of his brothers, and they were looking around as if they were searching for something. They wouldn’t find whatever it was they were looking for.

  Ronan didn’t just have the power to block them—this house and the demons here—from view. No, it was so much more than that, so much stronger. It was as if her brother had created a pocket that he’d slipped the house into. And Gunner and his brothers couldn’t enter without Ronan or Sir’s say-so.

  Gunner walked around the yard outside. Ronan’s block made it appear as if she were seeing the knights through intense, undulating heatwaves.

  She glanced over her shoulder. Sir was still in a deep sleep. She’d taken a lot of his blood. He slept heavily after she fed properly, needing to regenerate what he’d lost. He wouldn’t wake for several hours.

  It was wrong to leave this room, but the thing inside her, the sensations that moved through her body whenever Gunner was close, was even stronger now. She needed to resist, but the force drawing her to him was impossible to fight.

  Tugging on her robe, she rushed out of the bedroom and down the stairs. She wanted to get closer to him, that’s all, to see what would happen. Maybe discover what this odd feeling inside her meant.

  Darting down the hall, she ducked through the kitchen to avoid the demons on patrol. The risk she was taking was huge, but still she couldn’t stop herself.

  Slipping out the back door, she moved around the side of the house.

  Her breath quickened again when she saw Gunner, and her skin flushed hot. The feeling was…she didn’t know how to describe it. Only that she wanted more of it.

  This is dangerous.

  But she had to know why she felt this way around him.

  She moved closer. The tall, heavily muscled knight was frowning. He was always frowning. He stopped suddenly and looked back in her direction. There was no way he could see her, and she took advantage, taking in her fill of the handsome male. He was always so serious, but there was a kindness in his eyes that made her belly grow even more squirmy and warm.

  His head tilted to the side, and he changed direction suddenly, moving with purpose, moving toward her. A moment later, he stood just inches from her, his wavy form distorted by Ronan’s block. She wanted to reach out and touch him so badly her fingers twitched at her side.

  And then she couldn’t resist it, and her hand lifted all on its own as he turned his body so he was looking right through her. Her hand hovered a mere centimeter from his bearded jaw. He frowned harder.

  Demons were starting to gather in the front yard, watching his brother. They hadn’t seen Gunner yet. But it was only a matter of time before they attacked. The knights would have no warning. One moment they would be alone, the next surrounded by their enemy.

  “Leave,” she said, unable to stop herself from giving the warning even though he wouldn’t hear her, the same way she hadn’t been able to let the beast hurt him months ago. “Leave this place and never come back.”

  Gunner jolted, his brows lowering.

  Had he heard her?

  No, it wasn’t possible.

  “Hello?” he said, voice deep and harsh.

  Luna froze, blinking at the male right in front of her. Shocked. He had. He’d heard her.

  “Over there!” one of the demons yelled.

  They’d seen Gunner.

  “They’re coming,” she said urgently.

  He spun around, drawing his sword.

  But it was too late, the demons had revealed themselves, weapons in hand. They attacked his brother, and Gunner ran to help him.

  Luna clenched her fists so hard her nails bit deep into her skin, trying to lift a block around him. Why was she risking everything for this male? It didn’t make sense.

  But again, she couldn’t stop herself from trying.

  Still recovering after her last punishment, she had to fight for it. Her nails dug deeper into her palms, and blood dripped down over her knuckles as she called her power forth.

  Her eyes rolled back as agony stabbed at her repeatedly. She wasn’t strong enough for this, not yet.

  Just a little longer.

  Demons attacked from the front, and Gunner fought them back with his sword, his battle cry lifting goose bumps all over her skin. The brothers were outnumbe
red.

  Bloody tears streaked down her face, but not from using her power, and not from physical pain. She was used to that. She lived with that every day. What did these tears mean? What did any of this mean?

  A demon ran at Gunner from behind, about to bury his blade in Gunner's skull.

  Now. It had to be now.

  The block flew up as the demon appeared, stabbing at Gunner. Instead of stabbing the knight, he hit her shield. The hilt of the demon’s knife bounced back, hitting him in the face with a bone-crunching thud. The demon shrieked in pain, and Gunner spun around with a snarl, weapon held up, ready to fight. More demons came at him, but met the same fate, failing to make contact with the massive knight.

  She forced herself to let her block dissolve, now that she’d ruined the demons’ chances of a sneak attack. She’d seen Gunner fight before, these demons were no match for the warrior, and he proved it by tearing through them easily.

  Still, she kept her power simmering, ready to throw up another block if necessary, and blood from her hands had pooled at her feet by the time Gunner and his brother had killed them all. At least twenty demons. Sir would be furious.

  Gunner turned in a slow circle, looking for more, but there were none.

  Grace had told Luna that the knights could protect her—and in a moment of weakness, the urge to go to Gunner now, to reveal herself, to ask him to take her with him, almost won out.

  But she couldn’t leave Ronan behind. He was being held somewhere close, he had to be, and until she could free him as well, she couldn’t leave.

  With one last look at Gunner, Luna spun and ran around the side of the house and through the back door before the sensation inside her, the one tempting her to get closer to the knight, became too much to resist.

  Padding up the stairs, she eased the bedroom door open and slipped back inside. It was dark, and it took a moment for her eyes to adjust.

  She blinked several times at the rumpled covers on the bed.

  The empty bed.

  Her gaze flew around the room.

  Sir stood by the window, still naked, his back to her, body held rigidly and fury rolling off him.

  “Sir…”

  The door slammed shut with invisible hands, the lock clicking in place, sealing her in.

  She began to shake, her buried human instincts reacting to his fury all on their own. “I can explain…”

  He lifted a hand, silencing her without words, and slowly turned to face her. His eyes were glowing, his yellow irises burning into her.

  “You saved him,” he said, voice echoing eerily. “I gave you everything, Luna. I’ve protected you, taken care of you and your brother. I gave you all of me. My blood, my heart, my body, and over and over again you throw it back in my face?”

  She shook harder. She’d never wanted any part of him. She had endured it, him, all of him, to stay alive, to protect her brother. And the only thing he cared about was how powerful she and Ronan made him.

  “You are an emotionless void, my little dhampir.”

  He’d said those words or variations of them to her many times, but for some reason when he said them now, she had to fight not to flinch.

  “It is beyond your capabilities to care for this knight. So, what is it? Has he offered you something? Something you want? It must be something good to risk betraying me again? Are you sharing intel with them?” he asked, voice deceptively calm, but she knew better.

  She shook her head. “I don’t know him. I don’t know what happened down there. I was only watching, I didn’t do anything…”

  “Shhh, not another word,” he said as he moved toward her, his blazing yellow eyes never once leaving her. He closed in and took her face in his hands. “You know what happens now, don’t you? You know what happens when you betray me?”

  Yes, and she’d rather be dead than endure it again.

  And by the time he’d finished with her, she’d be as close to death as she’d ever been before.

  Chapter 3

  Gunner woke with a shout, heart pounding, body soaked with sweat. That scream, Christ, it shook him to the core. His skin was hot and cold at the same time, tingling, goose bumps raised all over his flesh.

  What the hell was wrong with him?

  You’re losing your mind.

  It was late afternoon, nearly time to head back out and hunt, thank fuck. It was the only thing keeping his head straight. Or maybe not. Shit.

  His and Rocco’s conversation about Kyler filtered through his head.

  “Have you sensed her at all?”

  “Sometimes, I think I do…but only when I’m asleep.”

  The echo of that tormented scream was still ringing through Gunner’s head.

  Could it be…

  He growled and shoved the covers back. No, goddammit, she was gone. He strode across the room, dragging a hand over his buzzed hair. Thoughts like that were dangerous for his state of mind. He’d end up like Rocco if he let that shit sink in and take hold. He’d searched for her, reached out for her repeatedly—still did. Without even realizing he was doing it. Christ, several times a day, and he always got the same thing back. Nothing.

  What he was hearing, that scream echoing through his mind every night, was his own damn guilty conscience. What else could it be?

  He strode to the shower, desperate to wash the sweat from his body. Cranking the water as hot as he could handle, he climbed in.

  Resting his hands on the cool tile, he let his head drop, hot water soothing his stiff muscles. And god help him as soon as he let down his guard, it flashed through him again, that brief moment when he felt her, his female. It had only been minutes, but it had hit him like a bolt of lightning.

  That memory was visceral, so damn real, and always came at him when he was at his weakest.

  It washed over him with the scalding hot water, forcing a cry from him before he could stop it.

  He’d never felt anything like it. Elation, fear, an all-consuming longing for someone he’d never even met but was suddenly the most important part of him.

  A missing piece he hadn’t known was missing until he’d felt her.

  Then she was gone, and he hadn’t felt whole since.

  Fuck, he’d known her at that moment, despite never laying eyes on her. And he felt her loss now in the same way he would feel the loss of one of his brothers.

  He ground his teeth, squeezing his eyes shut as it came again, this time stronger. It was like she was there with him now, a shadow pressed against his side. His cock hardened as that familiar craving for her pumped through him like it had back then. A craving that would never, could never be satisfied.

  Gunner used to like fucking, a lot—females, males, goddamn orgies, it hadn’t mattered. It was just sex. A release. He couldn’t do it anymore. He didn’t want anyone else. He only wanted one female, his female, and he could never have her.

  It wasn’t even about the sex. It was a craving deeper than that, so much deeper. He saw it with his brothers and their mates. They only had to look at each other to communicate what they wanted, how they felt, and the longer they were together, the stronger it got.

  Gunner could think of so many times Kryos would suddenly stop what he was doing and go to Meredith as if she’d just called his name. He’d said he just knew she needed him.

  It didn’t matter what for.

  He just knew.

  Gunner had wanted that, more than anything. He wanted his female with a deep unwavering longing that physically hurt. Rocco was the only male who understood the feeling.

  Not that Gunner had shared what happened to him with his brother. Rocco had enough to deal with as it was.

  Another wave of longing hit him hard, making his muscles twitch and his limbs weak. He cursed and quickly ran the soap over his body, ignoring the ache of his neglected cock, and shut off the water.

  She was dead. Gone forever. He’d feel her if she was still out there. And somehow, he had to learn to live with the unbearable grief of i
t.

  He dried off, dressed, and got the hell out of his apartment. In his head was not somewhere he needed to be right then.

  Grace came running out of her and Chaos’s apartment down the hall as he walked out. All color had drained from her face, and she was visibly shaking. The female was a warrior, not much scared her. But right now, she was close to freaking the fuck out.

  “Grace,” Gunner called.

  She was already pushing through the door into the stairwell, flying up the stairs. Gunner followed quickly. He caught up to her just as she ran into the control room, and unsurprising, Chaos was already striding toward her, face etched with worry.

  “What is it, angel?”

  “It’s her,” Grace said, voice shaking as she pulled out her phone, handing it to her mate. “Someone just texted me from her number.”

  Chaos scanned the phone.

  “What’s going on?” Gunner moved in.

  Grace glanced up at him. “It’s from her phone, the female who helped me escape that warehouse. It’s been months. God, I thought she was dead.”

  After letting them know where to find the abducted demi, she’d blocked Grace’s number and Grace had been worried about the female ever since, even going as far as getting her crew to keep an eye out for her, to ask around and see if anyone knew her.

  There’d been nothing. Until now.

  “She messaged you?”

  Grace shook her head. “Someone else.”

  Chaos was frowning and held the phone up for Gunner to read.

  Goth Girl: She needs you. You owe her.

  A screenshot of GPS coordinates was underneath.

  Gunner frowned at it. “I’ve been here.”

  Grace was in his face in an instant. “What? When?”

  Something seriously fucked up was going on. “About a month ago, Roc and I followed a couple of leathren to a vacant lot. We’ve been watching the place ever since.” He pointed at the screen. “Right here.” He’d told Chaos about it at the time. They’d decided to patrol the area regularly. He glanced up at Chaos. “I’ve seen nothing else in all these weeks.”