by Jazz Jordan
CHAPTER 6
Carmen lay in the hospital bed. She was connected to a ventilator with tubes coming out of her nose. When she saw her daughter and her mother standing in the doorway, she managed a faint smile; although, her pain was so intense that the morphine drip seemed weaker than aspirin. As the two women she loved most in the world approached her with worried expressions on their faces, Carmen wondered, Do I really look that bad?
After all, she was a woman who was best-known for her flawless appearance and captivating performances on the silver screen. Carmen’s film career began in the 70’s. With her smooth, honey-colored skin, button nose, full lips and hourglass shape, she was hotter than Pam Grier. At least, that’s what she thought.
But unlike Pam who starred in Hollywood blockbusters like Foxy Brown and Black Mama White Mama, Carmen made her fortune as a XXX star under the marquis Caramel Carmen in films like Bending Over To Get Over and Soul Saliva. Now, several years later, she was an icon, right up there with her veteran pal Ron Jeremy.
Initially, Carmen tried to make it as a legitimate actress, just like her mother Ida, who worked steadily in the 50’s and 60’s as a contract player for MGM Studios. But despite the fact that she was talented enough to play opposite Bette Davis, she was stuck playing the role of her maid. Once the film work dried up, Ida cleaned houses in real life to pay the bills.
After Carmen graduated from high school, and started to go on more auditions, she got frustrated by the lack of roles for black women. She didn’t want to play a junkie, and she refused to play a maid like her mother. So when a film director offered her a leading role in a feature film, she jumped at the chance. It wasn’t a huge deal if she had to take off her clothes and have sex. At least she didn’t have to demean herself by emulating Hattie McDaniels in Gone with the Wind.
Ironically enough, in her adult films, she got to play a doctor, a lawyer and even a US Senator. The porn industry brought to Carmen her husband, her fame and her fortune. But there was no denying that it took a toll on those she loved most. Ida was ashamed of her, and Angelique wanted nothing to do with her. Sometimes, she couldn’t even believe that the child came from her womb. How could any daughter of hers be so uptight about sex?
Carmen used her money to send Angelique to Los Angeles’s most prestigious private schools and paid cash for her tuition at Spelman College. Angelique had the kind of childhood Carmen would have envied, especially compared to her own South Central upbringing. So far as Carmen was concerned, she wasn’t perfect, but she wasn’t the world’s worst mother either. She didn’t know what it would take to make her daughter love her again, but she hoped that she could figure it out before it was too late.
“How was your flight?” Carmen asked. Her voice sounded groggy.
“It was fine,” Angelique said. “How are you?”
“I’m okay.” Carmen smiled. “You look good. Did you do something different with your hair?”
“Not really.” Angelique started crying. “You could have died? You know that? And for what?”
Carmen shook her head. “I’m not dead, and I’m not dying, so stop talking like that.”
“Did Dave put you up to this? What is it? Double-D wasn’t big enough for him anymore? What the hell is wrong with you?”
“No, this had nothing to do with Dave. I made the decision to do it on my own.” Carmen looked down at her Triple-D breasts.
“Hey, look who’s in town!” Dave stood in the doorway holding a bouquet of pink and white lilies. He was a tall, fit man with dark gray hair and bright blue eyes. To Carmen, her husband still looked as handsome as he did thirty-five years ago when they met on the set of Dirty & Dangerous.
Dave hugged Angelique and Ida, then he placed the flowers on the nightstand and kissed Carmen on the forehead. “I wish I could hug you too baby, but I know you’ve got a lot of healing to do.”
“Thanks for the flowers; they’re gorgeous,” Carmen said.
“They can’t compare to you, doll face, but I figured you needed something to brighten this place up. Hospitals are such a drag. I can’t wait till they let you out of here; I’m climbin’ the walls without you, baby.” He turned to Angelique. “So what’s happenin’ in the N.Y.?”
“Everything is fine.”
Carmen smiled. “Is it true that you’re working with Big Buck?”
“Yes, Mother, I am working with him, but unlike you, I’m keeping my clothes on…”
“If it’s any consolation, I never shot anything with Big Buck.”
“Speak for yourself!” Dave grinned. “I just loved working with him; Big Buck more than lived up to his…”
“Lord, help me!” Ida started humming “Go Tell It on the Mountain” loudly.
Dave squeezed Ida’s shoulder. “I’m just kidding. I never worked with Big Buck.”
Angelique took a deep breath; clearly she was relieved. Carmen often felt sorry for her daughter. She took life way too seriously; although, some might argue that Carmen didn’t take life seriously enough.
Dr. Edwards walked into the room holding a clipboard. He smiled. “I see that you’ve got the whole family here.”
“Dr. Edwards, you remember my husband, Dave and my mother, Ida, and this is my daughter, Angelique. She just flew in from New York.”
“Well, I’m glad all of you are here because I’ve got some good news. Your blood work came in, and your vitals are improving. We’ll have you off that ventilator soon, and you’ll be out of ICU.”
“That’s great, doc, but when can she come home?” Dave asked.
“It’s too soon to say at this point, but I anticipate that your wife will be here for a few more weeks. But like I said, her condition is improving. That’s definitely cause for celebration.”
“Yes, that is a blessing.” Ida nodded.
Dr. Edwards turned to Carmen. “But the infection isn’t completely out of your system yet. We’re going to increase your antibiotics, and hopefully we’ll nip it in the bud. I’ll be back in to check on you periodically.” He turned to Ida, Angelique and Dave. “Once again, it was nice meeting you all.”
As Dr. Edwards left out, Dave turned to Carmen and said, “I knew you’d pull through. You’re a tiger, baby.”
Carmen smiled, grateful to hear the good news about her health.
“I’m glad you’re gonna be okay,” Angelique said. “But this has to be it. No more plastic surgery.”
“I think your mom is beautiful just the way she is; I told her she didn’t need it,” Dave added.
“I don’t plan to go under the knife again, but…”
“But nothing!” Ida shook her head. “Angelique is right. I’m not gonna let you put yourself through this again, not to mention putting us through it.”
“Okay, okay,” Carmen said. “You guys win, but this is my body, and I’ll do what I want with it.”
Angelique rolled her eyes. “That’s exactly what you’ve always done!”
“And? What’s wrong with that? We’re all sexual beings. In case you didn’t know, human life doesn’t come from osmosis.”
“You’re unbelievable!”
“Listen! Listen! Why doesn’t everybody just mellow out,” Dave said. “Take a chill pill already. The doc gave us some good news. Can we at least try to be a happy family for a few minutes, for Carmen’s sake?”
“Grandma, I’m ready to leave,” Angelique said.
“Okay, sweetie, that’s fine by me,” Ida said, her eyes echoing the same sentiment. “We’ll be back to see you first thing in the morning.”
Don’t bother if you’re gonna bring that negative attitude with you, Carmen thought as she said, “I’ll see you then.”
“Take care, sweetie,” Ida said. Then she turned to Dave. “Don’t you keep her up all night; she needs her rest.”
“Yes, ma’am,” Dave said.
“Bye,” Angelique said as she hurried to the door. Ida waved goodbye, and seconds later, they were gone.
“Where did
I go wrong with that girl?” Carmen asked.
Dave sat in the chair next to her hospital bed. He patted her hand affectionately and said, “You can’t beat yourself up about it baby. Angelique is grown now.”
“I know, but… You’re right. Two tears in a bucket, so fuck it! I know I wasn’t Suzie Homemaker, but I did the best I could, considering…”
“For some people, even the best isn’t good enough. What can you do with that?” He paused. “When you get out of here, how about we take a drive upstate to Monterey? We can stop off at a few vineyards, taste a little wine along the way. It’ll be beautiful, me, and you, and the mist and the mountains.”
Carmen smiled. “You always know how to cheer me up.”
Dave kissed her lips gently. “Keeping you happy is my most important job.”
“I love you.”
“I love you too, baby. Hell, I was in love with you since we shot our first scene together, and the director yelled out, ‘Cut!’ I never wanted it to end. But what I wanted and what he wanted didn’t jive…” Dave looked down at his crotch. “Seeing as how you made me blow my load in three minutes flat, and I almost got fired.”
Carmen laughed genuinely for the first time since her hospital stay.
