by V Vee
From disappointment.
I’d always felt a little… superior, to the women who wound up in abusive relationships. I mean, I felt bad for them, only a monster would accuse them of being at fault, but I’d still, in some dark, twisted, cold-hearted part of my brain, felt better than them, because I’d never been in an abusive relationship. I’d questioned, where no one could hear me, how they’d allowed themselves to be in such a situation. Why they hadn’t simply walked away. Why they hadn’t fought back. Why they hadn’t called the police or family or friends.
But when one of Zander’s hands moved from my shirt to wrap around my neck while the other, mercilessly forced its way in between my legs, I understood.
Fear had caused my limbs to lock. Zander appeared so much bigger to me in that moment. So much stronger. I knew I was a woman who had strength. I knew how to fight. Kynan had picked up where Eddie left off years ago and had spent months training me in self-defense, and yet, all that knowledge went out the window as Zander held me pinned to the wall and proceeded to force himself inside of me.
I was immobile, my eyes were wide, and my gaze was trained on a smudge against the opposite wall.
I wonder how that got there. I’m going to have to get a bleach wipe and clean it. But… maybe that won’t work. I’ll probably have to get a scouring pad, and some all-purpose cleaner. Or even some paint and just go over it. I don’t want to be fined for it.
I knew I was disengaged from what was taking place in my home, feet away from where my daughter lay, angry at me for grounding her. While it wasn’t the first time Zander had simply… used my body, this was the first time I’d felt as if he’d raped me.
Fuck. How did I wind up here?
Oh yeah. Eddie left me. Refused to help with Ashley. Ava and Kynan were going through something themselves. Ava was pregnant with triplets, our siblings were trying to kill her, Kynan was off on some sort of mission for his brother, and Zander had stepped in to help. He’d helped me. He’d helped Ava.
He’d claimed Ashley as his own.
I owed him.
I was indebted to him, and his parents. They’d gotten me my job. It was their name which had opened the door for Ashley to go to the private school she went to.
So I didn’t want to have sex with him, but I could suck it up and deal with it for my sister. For my daughter.
When he was finished, Zander released me and stepped away, fixing his clothes. I didn’t speak, simply walked towards the bathroom, his seed running down my thighs, so I could clean up. I refused to look at my image in the mirror’s reflection. Shame burned hot in my belly, bile clogged my throat, and unshed tears burned my eyes.
I didn’t have time to cry. I didn’t have the energy to cry. Not right then. Not at that moment. I was a single mother. A scientist.
I was getting married in a few months.
Maybe once we got married things would be better.
But when I stepped out of the bathroom and met up with Zander who was leaving Ashley’s room, wishing her a goodnight and telling her that he loved her, the expression on his face made me doubt it.
“Do you want me to make you dinner?” I offered, clearing my throat because I know how much he hated to hear any type of emotion in my voice after having sex with me. He’d told me I made him feel guilty. Which had never been my intention. So I kept my words devoid of feeling.
Zander shook his head and headed into the kitchen. He pulled off his button-down shirt and tossed it into the trash. Then, standing at my sink, he washed the blood from his face and pressed against the bruise darkening his skin on his side. He growled after a moment, then gripped the edges of the counter. I watched him warily.
My kitchen wasn’t that big, so if he decided to turn and come after me there wasn’t really anywhere I could run. And all the knives were on the counter next to him. So I waited anxiously for his next move. Hoping against hope he would calm down and tell me what was going on.
“Eddie is back.”
I blinked at his words. They were delivered in a monotone voice, and yet they rocked my world and threw it off its axis. I stumbled over to one of the black, cushioned bar stools that sat in front of the kitchen island and collapsed into it. I didn’t respond. I couldn’t respond. I stared down at the grey and black marble countertop and tried to process Zander’s words.
Eddie was back? Why didn’t he come looking for me? Is he back for good?
My thoughts all collided with each other as I sat in my kitchen, my heart pounding in my chest. However, I was snatched from my erratic thinking, when Zander gripped my chin in a firm, uncompromising grasp.
“Don’t even think about going back to him,” he snarled in my face. “You belong to me. You understand me?”
I swallowed nervously and nodded.
“Good.” Zander stepped back and spun on his heels, walking back through my place, picking up his discarded shoes, wallet, phone, and keys. I stood at the entrance to the kitchen, silently watching. I wasn’t surprised that Zander was leaving. He rarely slept over. And while we were engaged, we didn’t live together yet.
Zander said it was because he wanted to build the perfect house for the three of us: him, Ashley, and me, to live in, but I knew the truth. He wasn’t done with the other women he brought back to his home to sleep with. And while I knew he was cheating on me; didn’t it say something about our relationship that I just… didn’t give a fuck?
“Stay the fuck away from Eddie, Heaven. Understand?” Zander warned me at the front door. “Don’t go looking for him. Don’t ask around about him. Just continue to pretend as if he doesn’t exist. Or you’re going to regret it.”
I simply nodded and held my breath until he’d finally stepped through the door, closing it behind him. I breathed a sigh of relief and slowly sank to the floor. I leaned forward, planting my hands on the carpeted floor, half of my body in the hallway, the other half in the kitchen. My toes pressed against the cool tiled floor, while my fingers clutched at the fibers of the Burberry carpet.
My body shook with silent sobs and I struggled with all of my might to prevent Ashley from hearing my tears. I’d done everything I could to shield her from the reality of my relationship with the man she thought was her father. I’d also tried to make up for the fact that her real father didn’t want her.
But I’d done it because I hadn’t felt as if I would ever see Eddie again. And yet…
He was back.
And without Zander having to tell me, it was apparent that the two of them had come to blows over my and Zander’s relationship. But, would Eddie be that upset if he didn’t still care about me? If he didn’t still want me and love me?
And knowing that it was a possibility that the first man I’d ever loved still wanted me, would that be the incentive I needed to finally leave Zander?
Chapter 4
Biotechnological Industries
Heaven’s Laboratory
Baltimore, MD
Eddie
Okay. I’d officially become a stalker.
The night before I’d gone to the address given to me by Ava and found myself sitting in the parking lot outside of Heaven’s condo. I’d had every intention of going up, knocking on the door, kissing her, then fucking us both stupid until she called Zander to break up with him. However, before I could put my plan into action, Zander had arrived, still looking like I’d handed him his ass—which I had—and had stormed up to Heaven’s place. I’d sat in my car, debating with myself on if I should go up and make my presence known. But when more than an hour passed and Zander still hadn’t reappeared, jealousy and rage flooded my system.
I knew I had to get out of there before I stormed upstairs and beat the fuck out of Zander. Again.
So I’d driven down the road to the gym that sat down the road on Lake Front Drive: Unboxed. As if he knew I needed him, Logan showed up about thirty minutes after I got there. My older brother and I had always been extremely close. I’d actually joined the Marines because I
wanted to emulate him. So, knowing how close we were, when I looked up and saw him standing in front of me, wearing a red tank, a pair of black and red gym shorts, and holding two pairs of boxing gloves, I simply smirked.
“It’s about time your dumbass got here,” I said.
Logan chuckled and rolled his eyes. “You know, normal people call.”
I waved away his comment. “We’re not normal.”
“True.”
We both taped up our hands then pulled on the gloves, lacing them up with our teeth, before accepting assistance from one of the gym’s trainers. I climbed into the ring ahead of Logan, bouncing around on my toes, loosening up, and trying to calm myself. I didn’t want to beat my brother’s ass too bad. Parker would kill me, and my nieces would give me those big hazel eyes, with those adorable pouts, and ask me why I hurt their “Daddy.” I could face any enemy out there, and in my eight years in Marine Intelligence, I had; but I couldn’t deal with the women in my life being upset with me.
Don’t laugh, if you had to deal with those pouty faces, you would feel the same.
“What has you so amped up?” Logan asked as he stepped into the ring with me. He went through his own process of loosening up, and I waited for him, still bouncing on my feet, anxious to slam my fists into something. To deal with all of the aggression that burned in my veins.
Even if my older brother had to be the recipient of all the anger pulsing inside of me.
“Zander,” I said through gritted teeth.
Logan quirked an eyebrow and nodded. “The bastard’s still alive?”
I huffed. “For now.”
“I admire your restraint,” Logan said, stepping forward so we could tap gloves.
“Oh… I’m going to kill him. I’m just biding my time.”
After that, there was no longer any room for talking. Logan and I hit our gloves together, stepped to the side to get mouth guards, then the fight was on. I tried, I really did, to remember that I wasn’t actually fighting Zander in the ring, but after two minutes my mind began to flash with images of the wedding invitation, Zander’s smug face as he came to confront me, and worse of all…
Zander going up to Heaven’s place and not coming back down immediately.
He’d been with my woman.
Kissing her.
Touching her.
Fucking her.
Fucking my goddamn woman.
It was that last thought that fueled my rage and before I knew it, I had three people holding me back, my older brother on the other side of the ring assuring the people around him that he was fine. I shook off the men who surrounded me and checked my brother for injuries. I winced as I saw the cut above his eye, the bruise forming on his cheek, and the multiple bruises showing on his arms, and no doubt his torso.
Shit.
“Lo, I’m sorry,” I apologized.
Logan waved me off.
“It’s okay little brother. I knew what I was getting myself into when I stepped into the ring with you.” He chuckled. “But can I make a suggestion before you spar with anyone else and end up killing them?”
I nodded and grimaced when Logan stepped over to me, hissing softly in pain.
“Go get your woman. Talk to her. Apologize. Do whatever you have to. Then deal with Zander. Because I really don’t want to have to bail you out of jail.”
I laughed and nodded.
Which led me here. Sitting outside of Biotech Industries. I’d left the gym, promising Logan I would “handle my shit,” then I’d driven straight over to Heaven’s place, breathing a sigh of relief when I saw that Zander’s car was missing. If it hadn’t been midnight I would have gone upstairs, but instead, I showed restraint and decided to keep watch.
Which was why I was awake to see the moment a tall, slender, ebony-skinned woman, who looked a bit like the model, Nyadak "Duckie" Thot, went upstairs, and watched as Heaven opened the door of her condo to her. I wasn’t sure who the woman was, but it was apparent that she and Heaven were friends. Close friends. Because Heaven left and the unidentified woman stayed at Heaven’s place.
Hmmm interesting.
I didn’t have time to stay and do more snooping or research. Instead I followed Heaven to work. And after giving her an hour to settle in, I headed inside.
“Hello, Sir. May I help you?” The cute, red-haired, green-eyed young woman asked from behind the receptionist desk. I looked down at her nametag and gave her my best, flirty smile.
“Why you sure can, Shannon,” I said. “I’m looking for Heaven Jones? I’m an old friend of hers from high school, heard she was working her and just thought I’d come by and say hi since I just got back from Afghanistan.”
As I knew it would, hearing about my time in the military opened doors that would have no doubt been closed to me otherwise.
“Oh, of course! Let me show you back to her office… or her lab, I should say,” Shannon said, excitement coloring her tone as she hopped up from her seat and led me over to the elevators.
I should feel bad. No doubt what she was doing was putting Shannon’s job at risk, but at the same time, I’d risk everyone’s career, people’s car insurance, their money, I didn’t fucking care. I would do whatever I had to in order to get to Heaven. In order to see her up close and personal again. In order to hold her. In order to…
Holy. Fuck. How was she still so goddamn beautiful?
I took in a shuddering breath as I watched Heaven move around the lab, grabbing beakers and test tubes and taking them back to one particular counter. Her black hair was pulled up into a bun at the back of her head. A pair of glasses rested on her nose; her dark brown skin glowed in the overhead light. She was wearing a scant amount of makeup on her face, it looked as if it was just lipstick, eyeliner, and mascara, and yet, she was still the most gorgeous woman I’d ever seen in my life.
And her body…
Shit. Had she always been so curvy?
I felt lightheaded as my human brain tried to take in the ethereal beauty of the woman before me. No mere mortal could take in all that loveliness and still survive, and yet I tried.
I failed. I closed my eyes for a moment and was surprised by the emotion that clogged my throat.
Fuck. I’d missed her.
“Hey Heaven, there’s a guy here for you. Says he knows you from high school. A Mister…” Shannon paused and frowned, no doubt just now realizing that she didn’t know my name. “What’s your name again?”
“Shannon, how many times have we told you about bringing people back to the lab? You’re supposed to get their names and allow us to come up front to them. And you don’t even know—” Heaven reprimanded as she turned in our direction.
“Eddie Steele,” I answered Shannon.
“Eddie,” Heaven breathed, her dark brown eyes widening as she took me in.
“Hey, Baby. I know I’m a little late, but I came back. For you.”
Chapter 5
Biotechnological Industries
Heaven’s Laboratory
Baltimore, MD
Heaven
This. Mother. Fucker.
“Thank you, Shannon,” I said to the company’s receptionist.
Shannon was young and an idealist. She was also a bit of a romantic. It was becoming a bit of a problem with all of us.
She’d let in three stalkers, four exes, two vengeful college students, and now…
This mother fucker.
Shannon grinned broadly at me. “Okay. Well… you two enjoy your reunion.” She batted her eyelashes flirtatiously at Eddie.
“Nice to meet you, Eddie.”
Eddie finally dragged his gaze away from me and grinned at her.
“It was nice to meet you as well,” he said with a wink in her direction.
Ugh. Asshole.
I rolled my eyes.
I turned away as Shannon left the lab, glad for once that I was in there all alone. The rest of the members of my team had left to go to go have coffee together. They didn’t usually in
vite me along because I never attended. Don’t ask me why. I wasn’t usually anti-social, but there were some things Zander had said to me over the years that made me a little uncomfortable with hanging with anyone… not him. Or not his friends and family.
“Did you miss me?”
Logan’s voice sounded much too close to me and I turned around quickly, gasping when I realized he was only two or three feet away.
“Why the fuck would I miss you?” I hissed.
He looked good. Too damn good. His shoulders were much broader than they had been when we’d been in high school. His torso packed with muscles that practically ripped at the seams of his t-shirt, his thighs so thickly muscled that the jeans hugged them like a second skin. He had a trim waist, his skin was tanned, and his dirty blond hair was cut short on the side, and longer on top.
“Because we love each other,” Eddie responded with a shrug.
I scoffed. “I loved you, but you didn’t love me.”
Eddie frowned and stepped even closer to me, looming over me with his large frame. “What the fuck would make you say some bullshit like that to me?”
“It’s the truth.”
“No it’s not.”
“Eddie. It is. You. Left. Me,” I practically yelled. I held up my hand when he went to speak. “No. You left me, Eddie. You didn’t talk to me about staying longer. Didn’t tell me why you wanted to. You just left for the Marines and disappeared from my life.” Fucking tears. I sniffled and stared at him, my heart clenching at the sight of Eddie’s own despair and the guilt darkening his visage. “I needed you and you weren’t here.”
I wouldn’t tell him why I needed him. He didn’t have the right to know about Ashley. But I wanted him to feel bad. I needed him to feel bad.
“Just tell me… What are you doing here?”
He pressed me back against the wall, placing one hand against the cool wood beside my head and leaned close.
