by Matt Musson
Immediately, I headed south along the road, up to Pickle Curve. I got there just in time to see Thor pushing his bicycle up the last sharp cliff face to the road. I dropped my equipment. With my left hand I grabbed onto one of the timbers sunk into the ground for the restraining rail. With my right hand I stretched out and grabbed the front wheel of Thor’s bike.
Pulling with all my might, I hefted the bike up those last few feet onto the road. As I strained, I could not help marveling that Thor climbed straight up carrying the blasted thing. Thor is a horse!
Once I got the bike up, I held out my hand and brought Thor over.
“What are you doing here?” he asked. “Did Charlie decide I needed help?”
“No,” I replied. “I’m just up here scavenging. I came up to see if I could find some rope or cable.”
“Oh,” he said. Thor quickly lost interest in me and pulled his cell phone out of his pocket.
“Damn!” he cursed, “Still no signal.” Thor looked over. “I’d love to stay and chat, but who knows how many miles I will have to ride before I can use the phone.”
Thor hopped onto his bike, threw me a salute and took off down the road.
“Thanks for the hand,” He yelled back over his shoulder. Then, Thor kicked it into gear and disappeared around the curve.
Taking that opportunity to survey the roadside, I saw was that half of the first guard post had been ripped right off. Not only had the driver missed the curve, she had missed it by a mile! I looked across and saw there were probably twenty five posts arranged to keep cars from going over the side. Several had been hit in the past. There were gauges and scrapes in a couple toward the middle of the curve. If the black sedan had hit in the center of these restraints there is no way it would have gone over the edge. But, she missed them completely.
But, I did not have time to do a crash investigation just now. I needed cable… fast. And, there was some right in front of my eyes. Each one of the wooden guard posts had a hole drilled through the center and a heavy woven steel rope ran through the middle. Of course, the question was: could I chop through steel cable that was strong enough to stop an automobile? The answer was obviously no. But, I had a secret weapon.
Without wasting any time, I dug through Shad’s stash of fireworks. There were plenty of firecrackers, smoke bombs and some rockets that I know for a fact are illegal in this state. But, I was not interested in those. Digging to the bottom, I pulled out packages of sparklers. They were what I was after.
As quickly as I could, I removed the sparklers from a box. Hurrying over to the cable fastened to the last guard post, I wrapped the sparklers one by one. They did not bend easily and in some places they cracked and the magnesium powder flaked off. But, I was hopeful that I still had enough to do the job.
Reaching back into the bag, I pulled out the long handle barbeque lighter that Shad used for setting off his pyrotechnics. I struck the lighter and held the end up against a sparkler.
At first nothing happened. But finally that one sparkler began to spark and spit. Soon the other sparklers ignited where they intersected with the first one. Before I knew it, the entire group of sparklers was burning white hot - between 1800 and 2000 degrees Fahrenheit.
“Burn, you son of a gun!” I yelled. And, I picked up my Pulaski axe and got ready.
I was pretty sure that even at these temperatures it would not burn through the cable. But, I hoped the heat would weaken the cable just enough. As the sparklers burned, I saw the cable getting red.
‘Aye Yow,” I yelled!
In one quick motion I brought the sharpened steel axe blade down on the cable. I felt the blade bite deep into the weakened wire.
It went more than halfway through!
Quickly, I bent the cable down the side of the post exposing the remaining steel threads. I began whacking the wire again and again, in a blind fury. After about ten solid whacks – the cable parted. So, I ran to the other end of the curve. Pulling the cable hand over hand through the holes in the guard posts, the end finally popped through. I had close to a hundred feet on the ground in front of me.
Getting out the rest of sparklers, I wrapped the other end of the cable. Once, again I ignited them with the lighter and once again they burned white hot. Then, with adrenalin pumping through my veins, I uncorked a powerful lumberjack swing. And, I missed completely!!
“Damn!” I cussed.
But I pulled the axe back over my shoulder and with both hands I took the hardest swing yet. This time, I did not miss. In fact, this time the steel axe blade sliced deep and severed the entire cable.
Coiling the steel cable over my shoulder, I grabbed my axe and stepped through the now open space between two guard posts.
“Geronimo,” I yelled, as I jumped off the road and onto the steep slope running down the mountain.
********
It was a lot faster going down the mountain than it was climbing up and in what seemed like no time at all, I was back at the crash site. I returned to find Charlie on his stomach, talking through the collapsed window. What he was saying? What do you say to someone in a case like that?
Toby and Bogdon were working vigorously on their bikes. They had removed the rubber tires from all four wheels and were now attempting to figure out how to lash one bike upside down to the top of the car.
“If we just had a hole in the bottom of the driver’s door right about here,” wished Bogdon. “Does anyone know how we can drill one with?”
I let the coiled cable slide off my shoulder, down my arm and onto the ground.
“You need a hole?” I asked. “Stand back.”
Once again, feeling like Paul Bunyan, I grabbed my Pulaski axe with both hands and swung like John Henry. The blade dug into the car door. It went in so deep, I had to struggle to free the axe.
Toby and Bogdon stood open mouthed. I had taken them by surprise. But, Toby quickly regained his composure and moved in to examine the door.
“This’ll do,” he said. “There are some steel supports under the sheet metal, but Jeep managed to come in between them.” He looked up at me. “Good Shot, Jeep!”
At that moment there was some crashing from the other side of the bushes. Suddenly, Freddie and Shad came sliding out. Freddie gave us an update.
“The cabin was picked pretty clean. But, we did find an old first aid kit. Maybe it will be of help. We also found plenty of rotten rope and lots of garbage but no crow bars. Shad grabbed an old inner tube in case we wanted to cut it up and make some fasteners.”
Toby examined Freddie and Shad’s spoils.
“Great work,” said Toby. “That first aid kit could be a godsend if we can just get them out of there. And, don’t cut up the inner tube just yet. Jeep found some cable we can use instead. Besides, I have an idea how we might use it later.”
“Freddy,” Toby continued, “you are the best climber in the bunch. Do you think you can shinny up this oak to that first big branch?”
Freddie looked up to the branch that was probably about twelve or fifteen feet up. “I can try,” he said.
Freddie really is a human fly. But, unfortunately, he did not have his climbing spikes with him. He had to get traction by digging his fingers into the bark of the tree. After several tries, the highest he got was about nine feet. We were at an impasse.
“I’ve got an idea,” said Shad.
With a determined look on his face, Shad walked over and picked up the coiled cable. “Hand me that backpack,” he said, pointing to the bag at Bogdon’s feet.
Bogdon picked up the knap sack and handed it over. Then, Shad tied the cable end to the knapsack. With the cable in his left hand, he began to twirl the backpack in his right like a cowboy would swing a lariat. Suddenly, Shad released the backpack and it sailed up and over the oak tree’s lower branch. With a firm grip on the cable, Shad lowered the backpack down the other side of the branch.
Freddie grabb
ed the backpack, untied the cable and made a loop. After testing the knot, he slipped the wire over his shoulders and under his arms. “Pull away!” Freddie ordered.
Shad took a firm grip on the cable. Then, he turned and walked away from the tree. In one smooth motion, he raised Freddie up to the huge branch. Like he was part monkey, Freddie scampered up over the branch and took a seat. Then, he untied the knot and slipped cable back over the limb.
Shad lowered the cable again. This time, Toby and Bogdon fastened one of the tireless bikes on to the end. Shad pulled the bike up to Freddie, who untied it and lashed the seat of the bike to the bottom of the limb. Freddie used the mountain bikes detached inner tubes to secure it into place. He wound the tubes around and around the limb at least ten times.
“I sure hope it will hold,” said Freddie.
“It will,” said Bogdon confidently.
“Why are you so sure?” asked Toby.
“Because it has to,” Bogdon replied.
The four bike tires would function as four separate pulleys. Tying one end of the cable the tree limb, we looped the cable down over the back tire of bicycle attached to the car. Then, we pulled it back over the rear tire of the bike in the tree. Then, we dropped the cable back down and around the front tire of the bicycle fixed to the car. Finally, we repeated the looping through the front tire of the tree bicycle and Freddie slid down the piece of cable hanging free and returned to the ground. He had done his part.
We had just enough cable left to tie around a three foot long oak branch, we policed up from the crash site. The branch enabled us to all grab onto a section and pull together. It dangled like a crossbar about 5 feet above the ground.
Our four pulley block and tackle was all set. Theoretically, if everything held together this would multiply our pulling force by a factor of four. With 250 lbs of force we could lift a 1000 lb object. Of course, in this case we were not trying to lift the entire car off the ground. We just wanted to pull one side up so we could push it back over.
“Conference Time,” said Toby. “Huddle up guys.”
We formed a circle around Toby and listened carefully to what he had to say.
“This could be real dangerous. If a cable snaps or a bike rim gives way, we could be seriously hurt. So, my question is, are we going to go through with this?”
Charlie responded, “I promised Mandy we would do whatever we could to help.” (Charlie must have found out the girl’s name while I was climbing the mountain.) He continued, “I can’t tell how badly her Mom is hurt. But, it’s a cinch that she needs medical help immediately. Unfortunately, I haven’t heard any sirens. And, even if they got here right now, it could still be hours before they can get down the mountain and cut her out. It’s a risk,” said Charlie. “But, I say let’s do it.”
Charlie stuck his hand in the middle of the circle. One by one, the rest of the Rangers put our hands on top. We were all in.
“Rangers, on three,” said Charlie.
“One”
“Two”
“Three”
“RANGERS!!!”
As a group, we walked back to the cable. Shad stepped up and put his hands on the branch like he was going to do pull ups.
“Slowly,” warned Bogdon.
Shad began to apply his weight to the limb. The cable grew tight and the bicycle wheels creaked and moaned. Then he lifted his right leg off the ground. Nothing happened.
Then, Shad lifted his left leg off the ground. There was more creaking and moaning, but still nothing happened.
Bogdon and Toby walked over and took hold of the limb. Bogdon was on Shad’s right side and Toby was on his left. They began applying their weight. There was more groaning and creaking. But, nothing happened until little Freddie walked up and put his hands on Shad’s shoulders. Then, he climbed up Shad’s back like a monkey.
“It’s moving!” shouted Charlie.
Charlie and I hurried over to the passenger side of the car and put our shoulders against the metal.
“PULL!” yelled Shad.
Everybody groaned. As the cable lifted up on the side of the car, Charlie and I pushed with our legs. And, the car began rising up on one side. It moved slowly at first. But then it picked up speed.
Now it was a foot off the ground. Now, it was a foot and a half. Now two feet!
As the car came up, Charlie and I got more leverage and could exert more force against it. This made it come up faster. But, we both knew if the pulley gave way now – it would fall and crush our legs!
“One,” screamed Charlie.
“Two,” he yelled.
“Three!”
“HEAVE!”
We pushed and pulled with all we had in us and sure enough that car straightened all the way up on its side. Then, for a second it seemed to be in balance. And then it began to lean over.
BAMMMM!
The car fell back over onto its wheels. Because, there was a pile of debris under the wheels on the upslope side, the flattened car was not perfectly level. Plus, that side was also sloping up the hill. But, the vehicle was right side up.
Charlie rushed to the window, “Mandy? Mandy are you okay?”
“I’m okay,” replied a scared little voice from within the vehicle. “I am right side up and I can see light coming through the cracks. Can you get us out now?”
“Don’t worry,” Charlie reassured her. “We’re working on it.”
Charlie walked back over to where we were standing. “Do any of you guys have any more genius ideas?”
Shad replied, “If we had a giant can opener, we could cut that roof open. Once more a 20 foot steel lever would come in handy.”
Of course we did not have a giant can opener. Nor did we have a 20 foot steel lever. So, we just stared at each other. At least until Freddie suggested the obvious solution that the rest of us had not even considered.
“Maybe there’s a jack in the trunk?” he said.
Charlie hurried back to the car. “Mandy? Do you think you can get your Mom’s keys out of the ignition? We need them to unlock the trunk – so we can get the jack out.”
“I don’t think so. The roof has her pinned pretty tightly. But, if I can find my purse, I have my set of keys in it.” A few seconds later she announced, “Here it is. I think I can slide it through this small opening.”
The brown end of a small clutch purse stuck out the window. Charlie grabbed it and tugged. He had to slide it back and forth several times, but he finally got it out. Charlie brought the purse around to the back where we waited behind the trunk. He snapped it open and pulled out a set of keys. Working quickly he began trying them one after another until he found the right one.
“Got it!” he said as the key turned.
But, the trunk was stuck shut. At least it was stuck until Shad pulled a spade off his bike. Shad stuck the blade in the trunk opening. When he threw his weight against the spade – the trunk lid popped up like a bagel in the toaster. While removing the spare tire and the jack equipment underneath, we heard the first cheerful sounds of sirens and emergency vehicles in the distance.
Thor had gotten through. We knew he would.
At that point we were feeling pretty hopeful – until we tried to put the jack beneath the crumpled roof. It was too tight a fit. The roof was crushed backwards and down. The clearance was still a couple of inches too tight for the jack.
“My turn,” said Toby.
Toby picked up the inner tube Shad and Freddie had brought back with first aid kit. When he pulled out his Swiss Army Knife, I thought maybe he was going to puncture the tire. But, instead, he used one of the blades to let some more air out of the partly deflated tube. After a few seconds, Toby slid the collapsed inner tube into the space between the car’s rear window area and the roof. Then Toby held up a can of FIX FLAT that he had found in the car’s trunk.
“I am making a pneumatic jack,” He announced to the team.
Toby connected the FIX FLAT to the rubber inner tube and pressed the button. The inner tube began to re-inflate. At first it just spread out between the roof and the rear window ledge. But, then an amazing thing happened. The tire expanded upward and began to push the roof up with it.
“That’s plenty!” Charlie exclaimed. He had been holding the jack stand against the opening for a measurement. Clearly, there was now plenty of room to slide it in now.
Toby flipped out another blade from his knife and began stabbing the tire. It did not take long before it deflated again. It also began to bleed the sticky green goo that must have been in the FIX FLAT can. As soon as we pulled the tube from the window, Charlie jammed in the jack stand. He attached the long handled bar and began turning the screw. We were lucky enough to catch a steel cross beam in the roof and a fairly solid spot on the rear window ledge. Slowly and surely the roof began rising forming a tent like V. The roof rose up to about a foot while Charlie turned the lever like a maniac. But, it was not long before he started to tire.
Toby realized it was time to switch, “Charlie, let Shad and Jeep take over. You go check on the girl.”
With some reluctance, Charlie stepped back from the jack and began massaging his palms like they were cramping up. Meanwhile, Shad took up position on one side of the handle and I stepped up to the other. He grabbed the outside section and I took the inner part. And, we began turning in unison. He pushed and I pulled.
It was tough going, but together we raised the center of the roof up to about two feet. Finally, Toby stopped us. Unhooking the handle and spinning the jack back down, he pulled the base out and spun it down some more.
The roof of the car was raised up in the middle. Next Toby placed the jack base down on an outside section of the roof that was still smashed down. Shad and I took turns on the jack again. This time, raising the roof seemed a little easier. But, we were huffing and puffing before we had this section all the way up. But finally, we had a crawl space big enough for someone to squeeze through.
Charlie called through the opening, “Mandy. Can you lower your seat all the way and slide out through the back?”
“I’ll try,” replied the voice. “But, I’m having trouble moving my left arm.”
We heard a thunk and a cry of pain as the seat flopped down hard.
