Little Lost Things
Arms of Grace Book II
Eleanor Chance
Darlington Publishing
Also by Eleanor Chance
Arms of Grace
Grace’s Favorite Italian Dishes
To Mom, for believing in me from the beginning.
Chapter One
Relief washed over Grace Walker when she heard the click of Johnny’s crutches in the entryway. Her son was ninety minutes late getting home from school. He’d been ignoring her calls and texts. He’d never been so late without calling, and Grace had imagined the worst, as any mother would, but she wasn’t just any mother.
Her fingers froze over the keyboard of her laptop that rested on the dining room table. It was impossible to predict which Johnny would wander into the living room. Would it be her precious little man who'd always adored her or the gawky blond stranger who'd taken up residence over the summer? It was a toss-up these days. She reminded herself to relax her shoulders but braced for the storm that could erupt when she questioned him about where he’d been.
The strain on their relationship had increased so gradually in the past months that it was hard to remember when it started. It seemed only days had passed since they’d laughed over a TV show they loved or chatted about new excitements in his life while enjoying his favorite ice cream. She found herself desperately longing for those times. She missed her little man.
Her friend, Alec Emerson, had warned her that just because Johnny had cerebral palsy as the result of the traumatic brain injury he suffered as a baby, it wouldn’t prevent him from experiencing typical teenage hormones. Grace should have heeded Alec’s wise warning, but she’d deluded herself into believing that Johnny would be different from other teenage boys. She could have spared herself from being blindsided by his erratic behavior. She loved Johnny more than life but navigating his ever-changing moods was exhausting.
The fact that Grace was fifty-five didn’t help. The parents of Johnny’s friends were in their late thirties or forties, not their fifties like Grace and her husband Ryan. The physical energy she’d had when she adopted Johnny twelve years earlier had diminished in the past few years. There were days she dreaded going home after a hectic day at the doctor’s office where she worked as a nurse, knowing she’d have to traverse the minefield with Johnny. She hoped this wouldn’t be one of those days.
Her eyes followed Johnny as he shuffled in and dropped onto the couch. His phone was out and turned on before he uttered a word and predictions became pointless. The gawky stranger had arrived. Grace was grateful that at least he’d deigned to occupy the same space as her instead of heading straight for his bedroom. It had been a chore to get him to breathe the same air as her lately. When she asked the previous week what she'd done to upset him, he grunted that he wanted her to stop hovering and treating him like a baby. She hadn't realized she was doing that, and his words stung.
She studied him over the lid of her laptop and marveled at the young man he'd become, despite the attitude. The struggle to survive middle school with his disabilities and progress from a wheelchair to crutches two years earlier had only made him stronger. Through pain and dogged determination, he'd achieved what his doctors had declared impossible. It was a victory they'd all celebrated. She couldn’t have been prouder of him and only hoped he’d continue that path of working to conquer his challenges.
She took the plunge and said, "You're late. You’re supposed to answer when Dad and I text or call. I was worried. Where were you?"
Johnny lowered his phone and stared through her. "At the library. I told you I was going."
"You said you'd be back at four. You were enjoying the library so much that you lost track of time?”
Johnny shrugged.
"How'd you get home?"
His eyes moved back to the phone screen. "Ty's brother."
Grace saved her notes for the lecture she’d be giving at the hospital the following week and closed the laptop. "So, Ty, Jason and you lost track of time at the library?"
That earned her a scowl. "Ty called Jason to get us. We were studying. Midterms, remember? What's with the interrogation?"
She had forgotten about midterms, but that didn’t mean she bought his story. Johnny was bright and rarely had to devote much time to studying for exams, and he'd had plenty of time to come up with an excuse for being late. She wasn’t in the mood for battle, so she let it drop for the moment and switched tactics.
"You hungry? Auntie Alec dropped off some pasta and focaccia bread earlier. She was sad to miss you."
He perked up at the mention of Alec's cooking. Though their family wasn’t technically related to the Emersons, they were more family than friends. Johnny had considered Alec and her husband Adam as his aunt and uncle since he was old enough to understand. It was the same for the Emerson's three children with Grace and her husband, Ryan. Grace was grateful for the bond between Johnny and Alec because Alec served as a buffer between them. It didn’t hurt that Johnny still thought Alec was cool, which was no mean feat.
"Sounds good." Johnny grabbed his crutches and leveraged himself off the couch. "Cannoli, too?"
Grace stood and headed for the kitchen. "Not this time. Stay there. I'll bring it to you."
"I can get it myself, Mom."
Grace raised her hands in surrender and let him pass. How horrible that I should dare offer to help, she thought as she followed him to the kitchen.
* * *
Johnny savored his aunt's mushroom ravioli while he worked up the courage to ask his mom “the question” he’d been working up the courage to ask for days. He dreaded the answer but couldn't put it off anymore. He wished he’d been more cooperative in the living room.
Just as he opened his mouth to ask, his mom said, "Speaking of your midterms, how are they going?"
Perfect opening, he thought. He put his fork down and raised his eyes to look directly at her like his dad was always bugging him to do. "They’re fine. I need to ask you something. You won't like it." He felt her tense but didn't let it stop him. "We're doing a genetics assignment in biology. Everyone's talking about family traits they inherited, but I don't know anything about my family. Is there any way for me to find out? Can we go to the people where you adopted me? There has to be info about my birth parents somewhere."
His mom pressed her palms together and watched him over the tips of her fingers. He could see the wheels spinning behind her eyes and knew she was searching for a way to dodge the questions.
"As much as I wish I had those answers, there's nothing we can do. We don't know much about you before those people abandoned you at the hospital. The best we can do is get DNA testing done on you. That would give us a lot of detail about your genes."
Johnny clamped his lips shut and breathed hard through his nose. It was what he expected, but that didn't mean he liked it. He'd heard her excuses and evasions before, but his gut told him she was hiding a secret about his past. What he couldn't figure out was why or how to break through her defenses. Auntie Alec told him his mom was more stubborn than anyone she'd ever known, but he didn't need to be her flesh and blood son to be just as stubborn.
"I'll get Dad to take me, or Auntie Alec. You can't stop me."
"They won't take you, and it would be a waste of time if they did. There's nothing for anyone to tell you and your file is sealed. I'm sorry, Johnny. I can't imagine how frustrating it must be for you, but there's nothing you can do."
It drove him crazy when she made statements like that, so sure, so final, like she had an answer to everything. He'd learned it was pointless to argue, so he let it go. He’d just have to convince his dad to help him. Dad was an easier mark.
"Fine, but it's not fair. I do want
a DNA test. It's better than nothing." His mom nodded and gave him that sad, pity look. "Don't do that."
She shook her head. "Do what?"
"Look at me like I'm a lost puppy. I said it's fine. I'm over it."
"Sorry, didn't know I was."
She started clearing the dishes, and Johnny gritted his teeth. As happy as he was that he'd escaped his wheelchair, there were still things he couldn't do. His friends complained all the time about chores. He'd give anything to do something as simple as loading the dishwasher.
"Don't forget about dinner tomorrow," Grace she as she rinsed his plate.
Johnny groaned. He had forgotten that his mom was having another one of her boring get-togethers. "Who's coming?"
"The Emersons, maybe Mark and Valerie if they can get away from the restaurant.”
So far, the guest list didn’t sound too terrible. It was always fun to see Auntie Alec and Uncle Adam, and Johnny hadn’t seen his stepbrother Mark and his wife Valerie for weeks. They were so slammed with their new restaurant that getting away on a Friday night was impossible. Johnny missed their son Fisher. He was only eleven but loved video games as much as Johnny did. Sophi was nine and a girl, so Johnny never paid much attention to her, no that it mattered. She and the Emerson’s twins were always in a corner giggling over some stupid thing anyway.
“Anyone else?” he asked.
“Just the Nichols."
Johnny perked up. "Is Jessie coming?" Jessie Nichol’s dad worked in the same doctor's office as his mom, but Johnny didn't like Dr. Nichols much. He was always trying to diagnose him, but Jessie was cute and funny. Johnny liked her even though she went to his rival high school.
Grace turned and gave Johnny a half smile. "Would it matter if I said yes?"
"It might, but did you forget tomorrow is the homecoming game? Darnell asked a bunch of us to come over right after school and then go to the game together. I said I'd go."
She crossed her arms and leaned against the counter. Here it comes, he thought.
"First, I don't remember you asking if you could go right after school, and I told you about this dinner last week. Second, you have PT with Tony at three. You can go to Darnell's after we eat."
"Everyone will be leaving for the game by the time I get there. It'll be a waste." The pitch of his voice rose with each word.
"We'll eat early, and you don't have to stay until everyone leaves."
Johnny leaned on his crutches and lifted himself off the chair. "Whatever," he said just loud enough for her to hear.
His mom put her hands on her hips. "I can change my mind and not let you go."
He glanced at her before turning to the door. "Sorry. After dinner's fine."
* * *
Grace tossed the extra pillows from the bed into the rocking chair and pulled back the covers. Before she could climb in, Ryan wrapped his around her from behind and pulled her close. He moved her hair to the side and brushed his lips on her neck.
"Hi, stranger. I feel like we haven't gone to bed together for weeks," he said.
Grace closed her eyes and smiled. Even after twelve years of marriage, he could get her revved up no matter how stressed out or tired she was. If anything, he was more attractive to her than when they'd met. His dark hair was still thick with only a slight hint of gray, and she could feel his muscles through her nightgown. She was grateful that he worked out to stay fit for his job as a state park ranger. He did it to keep up with the younger rangers, but Grace was more than willing to reap the benefits of his hard work.
"It's only been a few days, and who's fault is that?" she whispered. "You're the night-owl. You know Johnny's still awake?"
Ryan put his nose in her soft, blond hair and took a deep breath. "You smell so good. Trust me, he's not paying any attention to us. We cease to exist once he's in his room."
Talking about Johnny reminded her of their strained conversation earlier, and it killed the mood. "I wish that were true. He and I got into it this afternoon. He asked about his birth parents."
Grace felt Ryan stiffen. "Can’t we talk about it in the morning?"
"I won't be able to stop thinking about it now."
Ryan gently gripped her shoulders and turned her to face him. "Does Johnny have to intrude into every aspect of our relationship? We’re allowed to have our own private world sometimes. "
"Sorry but it's too late for me to shut it off." Grace dropped onto the bed and patted the covers. "Let me get it out. Then, I’ll willingly give you my full attention.”
Ryan gave an exaggerated sigh and dropped onto the bed next to her. "That sounds promising. Make it quick."
"First, he came home late and lied about where he’d been. I’m more determined than ever to put that parental tracker on his phone."
"And I still say it’s a terrible idea. It's too 'helicopter parent,' and it could backfire. He'd be furious if he found out you put the tracker on his phone without telling him. Johnny's a good kid, and we know all his friends' parents. If you're determined to do this, talk to him about it first. Explain why it’s so important to you."
"He'd never agree or understand. Johnny's not a typical kid. We have his medical issues to consider, and that kidnapper Mara is still out there. Maybe she’ll come and try to steal Johnny from us. She thinks he’s her son. I'm installing that tracker in the morning before he wakes up."
"If Mara wanted to come for Johnny, she’d have done it by now. Forget her. You should be telling Johnny all of this, not me. Trust me, you’ll regret it, and I want none of the credit."
"I’ll take full responsibility."
Ryan leaned over and kissed her neck. "Good. Can we go back to where we were?"
“There's more." Ryan groaned but motioned for her to continue.
She recounted her conversation with Johnny about his birth parents. Ryan had badgered her for three years to tell Johnny about his past, but she’d refused. Johnny's life was hard enough without having to worry about old tragedies. All he knew was that he’d been abandoned at the hospital when he was six months old, and Grace had adopted him shortly before she married Ryan. That had satisfied him until recently. She'd hoped for more time to build up the courage to tell him the truth.
"Be prepared for him to ask you to take him to see the records. You can't do it."
"If we tell him what happened, there's no reason he can't see the records. I’m sick of lying to him about this," Ryan said.
"We're not lying. We’re just withholding some of the truth. I'm Johnny’s mother. I'll know when the time is right."
"And I'm his father. Don't I get a say? I've raised three other children, but you seem to forget that when it fits your agenda."
Grace squeezed his hand. "I’m sorry. That wasn’t fair. Of course, you have an equal say." She studied her hand resting on his arm to avoid meeting his eyes. "Maybe I'm the one who's not ready. I’m afraid telling him will turn his world upside down."
Ryan brushed a lock of her hair off her cheek and tucked it behind her ear. "It will alter his world, but we’ll be there to help him set it right. You don't have to do this alone. The news will be life-altering but imagine what'll happen if he finds out from other sources. That can't happen. I won't let it."
Grace nodded, and Ryan put his arm around her. She snuggled against him and tried to force her body to relax. She forgot at times that she didn't have to face life alone. She’d had to fight the world on her own for so long before Ryan and Johnny came along.
"Be patient a little longer. I'll know when he's ready."
"Don't take too long. Time has more than run out."
* * *
Putting the parental tracker on Johnny's phone had gone off without a hitch. It was fortunate that he slept like the dead and hadn't stirred when she slipped his phone off the nightstand. She tested it with the app on her phone before going into the office. It showed that he was a block from the high school, which was where he should have been. She breathed a sigh of relief and went into to work
.
She tapped on Dr. Carter's door on the way to her office and poked her head inside.
"Morning, Grace. You're early," he said. "Come in."
"Hi, Brad. I'm not earlier than you." She walked to his desk but didn't sit down. She wasn’t planning to stay long.
"Charts," he said and gestured at his monitor. "I'm finishing the report for the Campbell baby. That was a tough one. Reminded me of Johnny in some ways."
Grace nodded. Brad had been Johnny’s doctor from almost the moment he was abandoned in the ER when he was six months old. Brad had taken such good care of Johnny that Grace was thrilled when he’d offered her a job seven years earlier.
"Johnny's what I'm here about,” she said. “He has a half day at school, and I'd like to pick him up and do some fence mending. Things have been rocky between us lately. Would it cause too much trouble here if I left early?"
Brad leaned back in his chair and smiled. "Ah, those wonderful teenage years when our children are swapped out with Martians. It'll get better when he's twenty."
"I'd rather not wait that long," Grace said, without smiling.
"What's going on with you two?"
She crossed her arms and looked at the carpet. "Like you said, typical teenage stuff."
"By all means, take your half-day. Hope it helps. Let me know if you ever want me to talk to him and run some interference. We still have a good rapport."
"Thanks, I might take you up on that."
Grace texted Johnny as soon as she got to her office. I'd like to pick you up after school and go for apple-cider donuts. Is that OK?
Grace drummed her fingers on the desk while she waited for his reply, which was taking far too long.
She jumped when her phone finally dinged. Darnell's giving me and Ty a ride home. Donuts another day?
Grace frowned at her phone. Why was everything a battle with him? But it's our tradition. We usually go so much earlier in the fall. You're going to Darnell's after dinner. See him then.
Little Lost Things Page 1
