by K. G. Reuss
She let out a laugh and shook her head, her blonde hair tumbling around her, before she pushed past me. I stared in horror as she yanked the door open. Ethan stepped out, his gaze roving from her to me.
When I caught the look on his face, I took a step back. There was only anger and pure hatred marring his handsome features. Juliet must have sensed it too because she stumbled away as he closed the door behind him.
“What the fuck are you doing here, Juliet?” he snarled, glaring down at her.
“I-I was looking for you. You never come around anymore—"
He advanced on her until she was against the wall. “And why do you think that is? You didn’t take the hint the first fucking time I told you? I don’t want you. You disgust me.”
“But we—"
“Have nothing, Juliet. We have nothing. You have something with Fox, and if he wants to play your pathetic games, that’s on him. Same for Cole and Enzo. But me?” He snorted. “Go fuck yourself because you won’t be getting it from me. Ever. And if you so much as think about hurting my girl, I’ll kill you and bury your body in your mother’s fucking flower garden. Got it?”
Juliet parted her lips and reached for Ethan as he backed away. He swatted at her hands, disgust on his face.
“Never again will a person touch me that I don’t want. You got that?”
She visibly swallowed and nodded, her eyes glistening with tears.
“Fucking monster,” he growled, backing away further. “Disgusting, fucking monster. Stay away from me and Rosalie. I mean it, Juliet. If you start shit, best believe I’ll finish it. You’ve already fucked everything up enough.”
And with that, Ethan turned his back on her and took my hand, leading me away. I cast one last glance over my shoulder at her to see tears snaking down her cheeks, her chest heaving.
Whether she was actually sad or pissed, I had no idea. Nor did I want to stick around and find out.
“It’ll be OK,” Ethan soothed, pushing my hair away from my face. “Don’t worry.”
“We can’t be seen together,” I croaked as I cast a hasty look up and down the empty hallways.
Ethan frowned and backed away from me. “I’m going to stay. You need me here—"
“No!” I surged to him and grasped his hands. “No, Ethan. You have to go. If you want to do anything for me, then leave. I-I need you to go. I need you well.”
“Oh, Rosalie,” he sighed, resting his forehead against mine. “I’ll call you when I can. I can’t take my phone with me, but I can use a community phone. When I get back, we need to talk. I can’t do this shit anymore.”
“What shit?” My pulse thundered in my ears. Was he done with me? Leaving? Did all of this push him over the edge? But he promised…Oh, god, maybe he does know about Cole…
“Where’d you go?” Ethan cradled my face in his hands.
“Is it bad? Whatever we need to talk about?” I swallowed the lump in my throat and peered into his eyes.
A small, sad smile graced his lips. “Not unless you want it to be. You and me? We’re good. I promised no matter what, we would be. I meant that.”
I nodded, my throat tight. The bell jangled, and the voices of students surrounded us as the cafeteria doors opened around the corner.
Ethan pressed his lips to mine in a deep kiss, breaking it off before I could collapse into his arms. When he moved away from me, the coolness of his departure left me feeling empty inside.
“I’ll see you soon, sweetheart. Promise.” And with those words, he turned and walked away from me as the halls began filling with students.
Twenty-Nine
Cautiously, I made my way to my car a week later. Worry over Juliet ratting me out to Ian had long since settled into my bones, so I was wary all the time. Ian didn’t act like anything had changed. If he knew, I definitely wouldn’t be crossing that parking lot that evening after rehearsals. Once again, Fox hadn’t bothered talking to me at. But he’d stared at me. It wasn’t just a look, though. There was so much turmoil in his baby blues that I nearly went to him.
But I knew I had to wait until I was free of Ian to do that. I still hadn’t had a chance to get the damn flash drive. Tonight, Mr. Dennison informed us the paper would be running the story about the musical in next week’s edition. Ethan had called me once since he’d left. He’d sounded tired but happy. It was the only saving grace I had since I’d also started feeling ill earlier today. I’d even dashed out of fourth hour to kneel in front of a toilet, hoping my nausea would pass. Luckily, it did, but that awful churning and exhaustion still plagued me.
“Hey, there, Sunshine,” Enzo called out to me as I crossed the parking lot.
“Enzo?” I stopped at my car and spun around. None of the guys had spoken to me in so long, so for him to be following me to my car had me curious. And nervous. Really nervous.
“How are you?” He stuffed his hands into his dark, ripped jeans and cocked his head at me. His black hair was in its perfect faux hawk, and he seemed cheerful.
“I’m OK,” I answered, frowning up at him.
“Yeah?”
I nodded. “What’s going on?”
He shrugged and stared at the setting sun and squinted his dark eyes before he focusing back on me. “Do you want to talk?”
I sighed. “Enzo, I’m really not feeling well. I have a lot going on and really just want to sleep.”
It was his turn to nod. “Yeah, I get it. I’m sick and tired too. That’s why I wanted to talk.”
I bit my bottom lip for a moment, recalling the last time he and I talked.
As if reading my mind, he winked at me. “I won’t fuck you unless you want me to.”
The heat of embarrassment flooded my face, and I ducked my head. Enzo reached out and tilted my chin up and stared down at me.
“I think about that day all the fucking time, Sunshine.” His voice took on a deep, sexy growl. “Even now, my cock is hard knowing you’re thinking of it too.” He stepped so close the heat from his body warmed me. “I’m very good at keeping secrets, Rosalie.” He leaned in a brushed his lips across mine. “I won’t tell.”
“I-I can’t,” I breathed out, squeezing my eyelids shut tight.
Enzo’s hands landed on my waist as he leaned in and ran his nose across my jaw. When he got to my ear, he whispered, “Because you love him, and betrayal isn’t part of who you are. Right?”
“I-I don’t love Ian,” I choked out, trembling and wanting beneath Enzo’s hold.
He let out a soft chuckle that sent a flurry of goosebumps rushing across my skin. “I’m not talking about Ian.” He kissed my pulse point. “I’m talking about Ethan.”
I said nothing, my heart racing, as he tightened his hold on my waist, his whispers continuing. “It’s OK. I can feel your want, Rosalie. If I touched you right now, you’d be wet for me. You’d be wet for us. Tell me, Sunshine. I’ll keep it a secret.”
“Yes,” I answered in a soft, shaky voice, not wanting to fight the truth. “I want you.”
“Care to show me?” His hand moved from my waist to between my legs. He snaked his fingers beneath the hem of my skirt and into my panties. Enzo gently brushed against my aching center. “Tell me yes and I’ll pick up where Ethan left off. Tell me no and I’ll walk away.”
“I-I can’t. It’ll hurt Ethan. I-I already—”
“Our world isn’t what you think it is,” he cut me off softly. “Fox. Me. Ethan. Cole. We’ve all been here.” His fingers slid lightly over my gash, making me shiver.
“Y-you know about Cole?” I rasped.
Enzo let out another dark chuckle. “I know everything, Rosalie. It’s part of what makes me so damn special.”
I swallowed thickly, my legs trembling as Enzo continued to brush against my wetness.
“Enzo?”
“Yes?”
“I…can we just... talk?” I held my breath, waiting for his answer. I’d changed my mind. I needed to talk.
“Of course, Sunshine,” he murmu
red, withdrawing his fingers and gazing down at me with crinkled eyebrows. “What’s wrong?” He’d completely shifted gears.
I cast a furtive look around.
“He’s not here. It’s OK.” Enzo thumbed my bottom lip. “I’d never put you in danger by risking him knowing, Rosalie.”
I nodded. I knew that, and despite everything that had transpired, I also knew Enzo was trustworthy, even if he could be cryptic. “Did you tell anyone a-about me a-and Cole? Ethan?”
“No.” The answer was simple. “I didn’t say a word.” He gave me a small smile.
I winced and rubbed my stomach, the nausea churning a storm.
“What’s wrong?”
“I don’t know. I think I’m getting sick or something.” I frowned as bile rose in my throat. The words had barely left my lips when I was shoving past Enzo and rushing behind my car to empty my stomach. Enzo was by my side immediately, holding my hair back as I threw up. When I was done, I leaned against the trunk of my car and squeezed my eyelids closed.
Enzo reached out for my forehead and frowned. “You don’t have a fever.” He was silent for a moment before he spoke again, “Do you and Ethan use condoms, Rosalie?”
“What?” What a weird question. “We’ve only done it once, and yes, we used a condom.”
“I used one,” he continued softly, moving a lock of hair away from my face. “And you haven’t been with Fox in a while. Ian?”
“No,” I snapped at him, wondering what the hell he was getting at.
Enzo nodded, his Adam’s apple bobbing. “And Cole?”
I froze, remembering that day over a month ago when Cole and I had been together backstage. No condom.
“Y-you don’t think I-I’m p-pregnant, do you? I’m on the pill.”
Enzo scratched his face for a moment as he surveyed me. “Ian was in your room. Fox and Cole were pissed about it.”
I winced at the memory but nodded.
“Did he have access to your pills?”
I nodded wordlessly again, the ugly memory of his hands on my pills. These don’t matter anyway. I hadn’t thought anything of it at the time, but if that bastard did something…my body shook. All Ian’s words from that day in my bedroom came rushing back.
“Did you miss your period this month, Rosalie?” Enzo’s voice snapped me back to the moment.
“I-I did. It happens sometimes. It’s been late before, but not like this. I should’ve had it already. I-I thought it was stress. I shouldn’t even tell you this stuff. No guy wants to hear—”
“Rosalie.” Enzo reached out for me and pulled me into a tight hug. “It could be nothing, but I think you should get a test if you don’t start feeling better in a few days. And don’t ever think I don’t want to hear about anything going on with you. This is important. Everything to do with you is.”
I twisted my fingers around his shirt and clung to him, a painful possible reality settling in.
“Enzo, I’m scared.”
“Shh,” he soothed softly. “It’s probably nothing. Try not to worry—”
“How the hell do I not worry?” I asked desperately. “What do I do if-if I am?”
“Then I’ll be there for you. So will Ethan and Fox. And Cole.”
“Oh god. What’s Cole going to say?” My breath came in short, sharp gasps.
“Stop, Rosalie.” Enzo gripped my shoulders and stared down at me. “Stop. Get the test. Don’t fly off the handle until you know. OK? One step at a time.”
I swallowed and nodded, feeling numb and frantic all at once.
“Do you want me to get you a test?” he asked softly, his dark eyes wavering as our gazes locked. “I’ll be there with you if you need me.”
“No. No. I-I’ll call Jamie.” I started to back away, but Enzo reached for me and took my hand.
“Rosalie. Nothing has changed. Don’t think it has. We still want you. We just wanted to give you some space. Whatever happens, we’ll be here for you.” He thumbed the tear on my cheek away.
“And Juliet? Will she be gone?” I asked the question I desperately needed the answer to.
“Yes. Soon, Sunshine. I’m working on a way to make her… go away.”
“I-I thought you guys wanted her over me—”
I was silenced as Enzo’s lips met mine in the softest, gentlest kiss. His hand cradled my face as his other rested on my waist.
When we broke apart, he whispered, “No one would ever choose her over you. In all of this, you’re the one we’ve chosen. I know it doesn’t look that way, but I swear to you it’s the truth. Once she’s gone for good, you’ll be ours. We aren’t ever letting you go, Rosalie. We never did. We never will. Do you understand?”
“Yes,” I whispered, my heart thudding hard.
“Tell me, Rosalie, will you come back?” His voice shook as he continued to hold me. “Even if you know the truth about everything and it scares or hurts you, will you come back?”
“I-I want to, but I’m scared—”
“You don’t need to be afraid, babe. Not when I’m here. Not when I hold you. Anything that happens, we’ll get through it together, OK? Promise me.”
“I promise. But Ethan—”
“Ethan will be happy, Rosalie. You know he will. Me kissing you. Cole and you. He won’t be mad. He wants this just as much as any of us do.”
I knew his friends were his family. I knew how much this all meant to him. But I’d gone behind his back with Cole. I’d kissed Enzo. I’d basically made Ethan choose. It all made me a monster. Maybe I’d stressed myself out to the point of sickness, but Cole didn’t wear a condom. And I was sick in so many other ways.
The nausea churned again.
“And if I’m pregnant, you won’t leave?”
“Not a fucking chance.” He pressed a fierce kiss to my forehead before his breath ruffled my hair. “For what it’s worth, I’m sorry for coming on to you earlier. I only wanted to talk, but damn, Sunshine, you do something to me when you open your mouth and look at me with those big, beautiful eyes. You’re my enchantress and fuck if you don’t have me under your spell.”
I gave a soft laugh and hugged him. I wasn’t feeling great, but I wasn’t freaking out as much inside. Not really. Enzo was right. I needed to take a test. One step at a time. I now had two birds to knock out: Pregnancy test and Ian. I wasn’t sure which one made me more nervous.
“You should go call Jamie. I’ll follow you home. I’m stopping at Fox’s anyway.” Enzo steered me back to my car door and opened it for me. I got behind the wheel, and he closed me in.
“Are you going to tell Fox and Cole?”
“No. You know I keep secrets, baby girl. Besides, there’s nothing to tell other than I was lucky and got to kiss you and hold you again. You don’t know how much I’ve missed that.”
“Maybe once we get this sorted, we-we can try again. I-I just need to get my stuff figured out right now. I have so much going on, and I really want to know what Ethan wants. If he says no—"
“Ethan won’t say no.”
“If he does a-and if I’m pregnant…” my voice cracked.
“Cole won’t walk out, Rosalie. Trust me on that.”
I nodded, my throat tight. “OK. No sense in worrying yet, right?”
“Right.” He offered me a sweet smile that made my heart tumble in my chest.
“You know, if I wasn’t supposed to be just with Ethan, and my life wasn’t falling apart right now, I’d have taken you up on your offer.” My words came out barely above a whisper.
“I know, Sunshine. I know.” He winked at me and backed away. “Raincheck?”
I gave him a shaky smile. “Yeah. I hope so.”
The smile on his face widened. “Let’s plan for the first Saturday of next month. My place. You in?”
“We’ll see.”
“That’s not a no. I accept it."
A lot of factors were in play. Factors that could change my life or end it.
Thirty
I stared
down at the pack of birth control pills in my hand.
“They look like birth control,” Jamie offered as she stood at my side. “I mean, they’re the right color at least and look to be about the right size. Some are still unopened in the packaging.”
I chewed the inside of my cheek as I surveyed them. They really did look like my birth control. Jamie took them from me. I went into one of my other drawers and pulled out an unopened pack. With shaky hands, I popped a tiny pill out of the tin. Jamie took one from the pack she held, and we compared the two pills like I’d suddenly become the Sherlock Holmes of the pharmaceutical world.
“Whoa,” Jamie choked out. “They’re different.”
Horror raced through me. I knew Ian was sneaky. He had to have switched out the packs with one of his own. I was sure he had the means, considering his side hustle. Bile burned my throat, this time not from being sick, but from disgust at what that monster did to me.
“He said he’d put a baby in my belly, and we’d be together forever,” I managed to say in a trembling voice. “Do you think he did this so that if I did do it with him, I’d be trapped?”
“Rosalie, we both know he’s a snake. I think your gut instinct is right. But you didn’t, right? You swear, you and Ian never had sex?”
“I never had sex with Ian.” I leaned against the sink, my head down as I drew in a shaky breath. “And I never will.”
“I got a test. I think you should take it.” Jamie reached into her purse still on her arm and pulled out three packages. “I got three different brands, just in case.”
“Fuck,” I groaned, rubbing my eyes. “Jamie, I’m scared—”
“It’s OK, Rosalie. I am too, but we can do this together, OK? I’ll be right here with you.”
I nodded, taking the boxes from her. I wiped at my damp eyes and drew in a calming breath. “OK. I need to know.”
“I’ll be in your room. We’ll wait together.” She backed out of the bathroom and offered me a comforting smile that didn’t quite reach her eyes. She was just as worried as I was.
