She peered up and beamed with happiness. “Will you not join us?”
His shoes were kicked into the corner, and his waistcoat discarded as he rushed to the bed. Eschewing the chair placed to one side, he sat upon the edge of the mattress as she stroked the babe’s cheek with her finger.
She winced as she leaned in his direction, and he tilted in to meet her. “I would like you to meet your son.” His eyes darted down to the child and back to her. She grinned and nodded as if to confirm her words.
He held his breath as the baby was deposited into his arms with care, and he peered down upon the small bundle, which was a bit larger than he had anticipated. He stared without a word, unable to remove his gaze from the marvel before him, until Elizabeth’s voice brought him back.
“Fitzwilliam?”
He caught her eye and broke into a smile as his frantic heart calmed and his eyes stung with tears. “It is no wonder you were miserable, my love. He is considerably larger than Georgiana when she was born.”
“He is handsome, is he not?”
His gaze traced his son’s eyelashes, his nose, and his lips. His son favoured him. “I believe he resembles me far too much to be considered handsome.”
Elizabeth shook her head and chuckled. “And I believe he is so very handsome due to his resemblance to you.” She patted the spot beside her. “I would like you to hold both of us in your arms if you are able.”
With great care, he adjusted himself beside her and wrapped his arm around her shoulders, so she could cuddle to his side; her head rested against the side of his chest with one hand touching the precious bundle in his other arm.
“Have you given thought to a name?”
Elizabeth had been adamant that she would not choose a name until she laid eyes upon their child. How else would they know if the name suited?
“I thought to ask you the same question. I would be pleased to call him Fitzwilliam.”
He lifted his eyebrows as his eyes widened. “I have never cared for my name. Please do not insist upon it for our child.” He peered down to his son’s angelic little face.” I felt we should name him for your father.”
She tilted her head so it would be easier to observe him. “But you never met my father.”
“That hardly signifies.” He frowned. He need not have made Mr. Bennet’s acquaintance to respect him! “He raised and educated you; he created the woman I love and the mother of my child. That alone deserves my respect and admiration.”
A tear dropped to her cheek as he pressed his lips upon her loose curls.
“I was so worried whilst you laboured.” His eyes burned and his voice cracked with emotion as he pulled her closer.
“I believe it was better you were not at my side. After all, you were here only a short time, and I attempted to strangle you.” She blushed and bit her lip. “Please forgive me.”
A tiny bark of laughter escaped his mouth. “You were in terrible pain and not responsible for your actions. Do not feel as though you should apologise.”
She drew his head down and claimed his lips. “I love you, and I am sorry you had to wait in suspense.”
“I will admit to not being so averse to the idea after helping you to the birthing chair. I attempted to drown myself in brandy when I returned to the library.”
Her eyes were wide and her jaw agape. “Did you really?”
“I did.” He pulled her a bit closer, prompting her to wince. “Richard wrested the glass from me and spilled brandy down my suit.”
She giggled and gazed at him with an adoring expression. “I thought I detected a slight smell of brandy, but I thought you drank it—not wore it.”
He closed his eyes and laid his head atop hers. “So, what about a name for this not so little man? I still wish to name him for your father.”
“Thomas Aaron Bennet was his name,” she replied. “We could use a portion if you wished rather than the whole?”
“I believe Thomas Aaron Bennet Darcy suits him well. Do you not think so?” He gazed at his son’s face, taking in the chubby, dimpled cheeks, the dark swath of hair that adorned his crown, and his little lips that moved as he suckled in his sleep.
His attention was diverted back to his wife, who sniffled beside him.
“I imagine it will, once he has grown into it.”
“You miss them today, I am sure.”
“When he was born, my first thought was of you and how excited you would be, but my second was of my family. I had a fleeting thought of who would notify them.”
“Oh, my love!” His arm gave her a gentle squeeze. “They know and are joyful for us. I am certain.”
“I miss them.” She gave a shuddering breath and wiped her cheeks. “Please do not think I am unhappy with you, but I do miss them.”
“It is natural to long for them. They were your family.” One side of his lips lifted. “Even when you mimic your mother, I know you loved her and it is part of how you remember her.”
His wife gave a quavering laugh. “I do miss her. She was silly, loud, and sometimes embarrassing, but she was still my mother. I remember how she held me in her arms when I broke my ankle. She did rant and rave that I had no compassion for her nerves, but when Mr. Jones wrapped my leg, she held me close. Of course, she began her complaints again when he was finished.”
His arm could not release the possessive hold of her shoulders. If only her mother could have been there for her today. “I know they are not the family who raised you, but there is an entire clan of Fitzwilliams and three Darcys who adore you.”
“And I adore them. The two Darcy men in particular.”
She yawned, and he relaxed, relieved she was exhausted but well. “You should rest. You were adamant you would feed this little man yourself, and I am certain he will be punctual in regards to when his meal is due.”
Her grin was still evident as her eyes drooped. “Perhaps a short nap,” she murmured as she drifted off to sleep.
Elizabeth jolted awake at the sound of Thomas’ loud complaints, and rolled over to find him in his great grandmother’s arms as she walked about the room.
“How long has he been awake?”
“He woke a half-hour ago, but I think he desired someone to fuss over him for a while. After all, every man wishes for a woman to fuss over him, do they not?” The dowager cooed as she said the last to the baby.
Elizabeth held out her arms and her son was passed into her embrace. He sought out the nipple offered and was soon nursing steadily, producing a rhythm of even gulps as her milk let down.
The elder lady took a seat upon the edge of the mattress. “His appetite has increased since he was born.”
“It has. I can scarcely believe it has already been a fortnight.”
“You seem more assured than you once envisioned.” The dowager settled an appraising eye upon her, and Elizabeth nodded.
“I am. Everything is much simpler than I imagined it would be.”
Thomas’ great grandmother looked with pride at her newest grandchild. “He is a good baby.”
“I am a very fortunate mama.” She turned her gaze to the dowager and reached out for her hand. “I am very lucky to have you as well.”
The dowager attempted to wave off her praise, but Elizabeth was adamant. “I have always called you grandmamma, but in my mind you were always Fitzwilliam’s grandmother. Whilst I laboured, I came to realise that I had ceased thinking of you in terms of my husband, and had come to think of you as my grandmother too.”
Her grandmother’s eyes flooded with tears as she reached over to hug her, minding the babe between them.
“How dare you make me cry! I have a reputation to uphold.” She withdrew and used her handkerchief to wipe her damp cheeks.
“Thank you for being of such help to me the day Thomas was born. I love you, Grandmamma.”
“I was happy to be of service to you, dear. With the difficult time you had, I was relieved you had a woman you knew—even if I have not known you f
or years.”
“You were of immeasurable aid. I was aware that the process would be painful, yet I had not expected it to be as severe as it was.”
“My sister’s birth was much the same, and she braced herself for the next labour, which turned out to be a pittance in comparison.”
A corner of her lips lifted. “So the next child may not be the trial that Thomas was?”
“Precisely!” Grandmamma grinned. “However, I am certain you find him worth the pain and effort.”
She laughed and stroked his downy cheek. “If you had asked me whilst I laboured, I might have given you a different answer, but now that he is in my arms, he was worth every bit of misery I endured. I suppose I understand a bit of my mother when she said we knew not how she suffered.”
Her grandmother chuckled and leaned forward. “I will now come to your aid if you wish to escape your confinement.”
Elizabeth shook her head. “I should be thankful to leave this room for a short time, but Mrs. Green would be apoplectic, and Fitzwilliam would fret.”
“Finish nursing Thomas, and I will help you dress. Then you can sneak down the servant’s stairs and take a short walk around the gardens. The sun is shining in a near cloudless sky, and it is a warm day for April.”
She bit her lip and studied her grandmother. “Very well, but if I am caught out, I will blame you.”
The dowager beamed. “I have large shoulders. Do not worry on my account.”
After Thomas’ back was patted, and he returned to sleep, she rose from the bed and stretched. Her grandmother helped her put on one of her simplest gowns, styled her hair, and aided her in slipping on her boots since she was still a tad sore.
She tiptoed down the servant’s hallways undetected until she startled the cook at the door to the kitchens. With a finger to her lips, she brought her hands together as if praying, begging for her silence, to which the heavy-set woman responded with a giggle and a bob of her head.
The freedom of walking in the garden was wonderful after being cloistered in her room for so long. The feel of the cool breeze on her cheeks, the sound of the birds chirping, and the warmth of the sun radiating upon her skin all lifted her spirits; however, she did remain close to the house, taking a path behind a stone wall to shield her presence from Mrs. Green.
Her fingers grazed along the petals of a rose as she strolled around the corner and startled at Fitzwilliam, who leaned against a tree before her.
“Have you made your escape?” His brows were drawn over his narrowed eyes.
“Only for a short time whilst Grandmamma minds Thomas.”
“I thought she had something to do with this rebellion against the midwife’s instruction.”
“I cannot remain abed in that room for a month complete, Fitzwilliam! I would die of boredom.” He raised his eyebrows in a silent challenge. “Very well! I would not die, but I needed to stretch my legs. I never planned to go any further from the house.
“I would have brought you out of doors had you asked. I knew I would be forced to spring you from your captivity soon, but I did not imagine you would venture out on your own.”
“Please do not be upset! I only walked here from the kitchens.”
He drew her into his arms. “I only ask that you do not leave our rooms by yourself. I could not bear it if something happened, and you were outside alone.”
“I feel stronger every day, and despite what the midwife says, I need to walk. I ache so when I am confined to the bed.”
“Then allow me to escort you, my lady.” She placed her hand upon his proffered arm, and they fell into step as they continued along the path.
“I had a letter from Georgiana this morning.”
“I noticed it in the stack of post. Did she impart any interesting information in this missive?”
She smirked at his question, but shrugged. “I am uncertain what to make of her letters as of late. Have you noticed anything amiss?”
His forehead furrowed, and he paused a moment to ponder the query before answering. “I cannot think of any reason to fret. What alarms you?”
“Her letters are brief, which is unusual as they are usually lengthy, and she does not seem as open—as if someone is monitoring her correspondence.” She paused and placed her other hand on his bicep. “Is it possible your father discovered our friendship?”
“I do not believe so, else we would have had a letter from him, and Georgiana’s correspondence would have ceased. Is that all you have noticed?”
“She has not mentioned us meeting in Ramsgate in the last few missives.”
“We have planned our arrival and have given her the dates. Perchance she does not see a reason to mention it.”
“Fitzwilliam.” She pulled on his arm to stop him. “She has been so excited that she has mentioned at the closing of every letter how she looks forward to Ramsgate. I do not think that would change, yet it has.”
“Would it ease your mind if we arrived at Ramsgate a few days early as a surprise? We could plan our arrival for the day my father departs.”
“I do,” she affirmed. “I cannot suppress the feeling that something is wrong.”
“I will attempt to elicit a confession of what the problem may be in my next letter, but there is little else we can do until June.”
She sighed and leaned against his arm as he continued towards the house.
“Can I tempt you with our comfortable bedchamber?” He waggled his eyebrows, eliciting a giggle from her lips, but when he opened the door, Mrs. Green stood just inside with one of the maids. The housekeeper turned and her eyes bulged.
“Mrs. Darcy!”
With a start, the muscles in her back stiffened. “So much for a successful escape,” she muttered under her breath.
“Not to worry, Mrs. Green.” He passed over his hat and gloves, and took Elizabeth’s hand. “I will have her returned to bed immediately.”
The housekeeper disappeared into the servant’s corridor, and Elizabeth’s shoulders lowered. “She did not have an apoplexy as I suspected she would.”
“Let us return to our son; I will keep you company for the remainder of the day. You may laze about in our sitting room if you like, and I may challenge you to a game of chess.”
“I did not think you ready to lose again so soon.”
His resonant laugh carried down the hallway. “I might surprise you by winning this time, Mrs. Darcy.”
She rolled her eyes with a grin. “I doubt it, Mr. Darcy. I sincerely doubt it.”
Darcy gazed across their carriage as his wife nursed their son, who was greedily suckling at her breast, while she hummed a soft melody and stroked the soft curls that peeked out from beneath his bonnet. Nothing was more beautiful than the two people he loved most in the world!
Two wonderful months had passed since his son’s birth. Those months had possessed ups and downs that they had navigated as best they could. The deprivation of sleep some nights taking its toll on his work during the day; however, Grandmamma had been correct when she said most new parents bungle through it to the best of their ability. One question was taken and solved at a time as they forged the road they wished to take.
One obstacle had been Elizabeth’s inability to produce enough milk to meet Thomas’ growing demand. She approached the problem with as much logic as she could muster, but, while she gave the impression she was at ease with the solution, she had not borne it well at all.
Yet, they had been fortunate. Tenants, whose wives were still nursing their own children, stepped forward to offer their help until a wet nurse could be obtained. Elizabeth continued to feed their son and was able to produce enough for three good feedings a day, so the tenant’s wives each ventured up to the house at their designated time to help.
For Elizabeth, the plans were easier to make than implement, and he had to console her when she could not bear to watch Thomas feed from another, holding her as she sobbed. With time, she became accustomed to their new situation and, after a
fortnight of inquiries, a permanent wet nurse was procured. Elizabeth still wished to do her share, and he could not deny her what gave her such happiness.
“Your Papa has such a serious stare,” she said to Thomas, as he watched her intently. “Do you think he looks to find fault?”
His lip quirked into a crooked smile. She once confided she had misunderstood his stare when they were first acquainted. She had thought he observed her to find fault, and now took great pleasure in teasing him about it. “I can assure you I do nothing more than take in the beauty before me.”
“Flatterer!” Her eyes twinkled and her smile was radiant; his heart warmed at the sight. God, he loved her—her and their son! There was nothing he would not sacrifice for their happiness.
Her gaze dropped to Thomas as she unlatched him from her nipple and brought him to her shoulder, his head lolling to the side as he slept. “He has taken the carriage ride better than I expected. I was worried he might cry the entire journey to Hertfordshire.
“I do hope he does not keep Aunt and Uncle Philips awake all night since he has slumbered the day away.”
He chuckled as she put her chemise, corset, and gown to rights, so she was covered before she began to pat his back.
“I do not expect they will mind.” He pulled out his pocket watch and checked the time. “We should be drawing close to Meryton. If you pivot to the side, I can help you button your gown.”
“You would make a proficient abigail,” she teased.
“Not too proficient.” He laughed as his fingers trailed up her back between buttons, and she gave a small shiver. “I would be more suited to aid you undress than to say, prepare you for dinner. I much prefer to disrobe you than to see you hidden beneath all these layers.”
“Behave, Mr. Darcy.”
He pressed his lips to the juncture of her graceful neck and shoulder. His last feather light kiss grazed the curve of her ear. “You prefer it when I misbehave.” He grinned at the gooseflesh that erupted down her shoulder and back as he whispered in her ear.
An Unwavering Trust Page 41
