What are we doing? There is no turning back. Can we really stop at just tonight?
This was what she wanted. One night, no-strings-attached sex. Even if it killed me, it was what I would give her, then I would walk away. We would go back to being friends.
Bullshit. Such bullshit.
Leaning down, I brushed my lips across hers. Her hands wrapped around my neck, and I deepened the kiss as I slowly made love to her. Our tongues danced together, and our bodies moved like we had been made for one another. Never in my life had I made love or felt a connection to a woman like this. I doubted I ever would again. Maybe it was because it was Morgan. Maybe it was because deep down I knew I had been in love with this woman since the moment I saw her.
Squeezing my eyes shut tighter, I pushed the thought away and moved faster. Slipping my fingers between hers, I pushed her hands above her head. Morgan moved in perfect rhythm with me. I felt her body building with her orgasm, and she squeezed around my cock.
“Morgan, come with me. Now.”
And like that, she cried out my name as we both came together. My entire body shook as my orgasm raced through me. It was like nothing I’d ever felt before. I was free falling and it was the best fucking high of my life. Feeling myself letting go inside her made my body warm, while the weirdest feeling hit me square in the chest.
I pressed my mouth to hers and kissed her like I had never kissed another woman before, all the while ignoring how my heart ached to whisper something my mind was telling me to hold back.
It was only for one night.
Rolling over, my hand landed on the cold sheets. I opened my eyes to see I was alone in the bed. I dropped onto my back and stared up at the ceiling. The memory of last night came rushing back like a gust of wind.
Morgan.
We had made love twice, then around five in the morning I had found her in the shower and I did what I had wanted to do since she made that proposition in the café. I fucked her. Fast and hard. Hearing her beg me to go faster, harder, nearly drove me mad. I came so hard my damn legs nearly buckled out from under me.
It was the next morning, and I waited for the guilt to set in. It didn’t. How much of a bastard did that make me? I had sex, with no condom, three times with Morgan.
Morgan.
Sitting up, I rubbed the back of my neck and let out a deep breath. She was probably in my kitchen, making breakfast. At least I hoped like hell that was what she was doing.
My phone beeped on the side table. Morgan’s name popped up.
With as a frown, I picked up my phone and opened her text message.
Morgan: Thank you for the incredible night. I’ve never felt so amazing, and I will cherish it forever.
And that was it. Nothing else. My heart dropped straight to the bottom of my stomach. Morgan was staying true to her promise. One night, no-strings-attached sex. But it had been more than that. I knew she felt it too.
Staring at the phone, I contemplated my reply. What in the hell did you say to someone after a night like that? It felt as if a part of me left with her, and I wasn’t sure how to deal with the aftermath. Everything we’d said to each other. The way she’d looked into my eyes when she came. None of that could be taken back, and I didn’t want to take any moment of it back.
“Fuck,” I whispered.
How in the hell did this happen?
“This can’t be right,” I whispered with a gruff laugh. “She can’t possibly think it was nothing but sex.”
Or did she?
I typed out my reply, trying like hell not to overthink anything.
Me: It was a great night. An amazing night, Morgan. I wish you would have let me take you home or at least said goodbye before you left.
She texted back instantly.
Morgan: I think it’s better this way. No awkward moment at my door. I’ve got an early morning appointment, so I had to leave early. I’m at my office now. I’ll see you around, Blake. M
“What the fuck? She blew me off.”
Laughing, I pushed my fingers through my hair and shook my head. There was no fucking way I would believe last night was just a onetime thing. That she hadn’t felt what I felt. I stared down at her text.
Then a sinking feeling hit me. Maybe it was. Morgan got what she wanted and now she was moving on. I ignored the way it felt like my lungs were constricting, making it difficult to breathe. I stood and took in a deep inhale, then slowly let it out.
Making my way to the bathroom, I jumped into the shower and turned the knob all the way to cold. I needed to try to forget about everything from last night. For my sake and for Morgan’s.
An hour later I was walking into my office. I came to a stop when I saw Tucker sitting in the chair.
“Tucker, hey, to what do I owe this honor?”
My heart raced as I tried to act normal.
He knew. Damn it, he somehow found out. Maybe someone from Tucker’s bar was at the club.
Shit. Shit. Shit.
“I stopped by to invite you over to a dinner party Charlie is hosting for Kaelynn and Nash. To celebrate their engagement and the baby.”
I dropped my briefcase onto my desk and sat. “Damn, I can’t believe they’re having a baby. You don’t think they’re moving too fast?”
Tucker shrugged. “They both seem happy. When love hits you, you sort of know.”
My eyes jerked up to his, and I don’t know which one of us was more stunned by what came out of my mouth next. “What does it feel like?”
Tucker grinned. “Love? Hell, like your entire world has been turned upside down, but in the most beautiful way. You can’t breathe with them near you, or when they’re away from you. You’d do anything to hear them laugh, see them smile. Holding them in your arms will erase all the day’s bullshit. It’s a crazy feeling.”
His description was almost the same as Butch’s.
Butch. Dear God.
If he knew what I had done with Morgan, he would probably have me killed.
“How did you know you were in love with Charlie?”
His head tilted to the side. “Why are you asking this, Blake?”
Acting casual, I answered, “I’m honestly just curious.”
He grinned again. “I think I felt it in my chest first. A weird, warming, squeezing sensation. Or sometimes I felt it right in the center of my gut. Like someone had tied my stomach in knots. Sort of like being back in school, when we used to have finals or big projects due.”
I nodded.
“You ever feel that way about a woman?”
Laughing, I lied. “No.” He didn’t need to know that was exactly how I felt around Morgan.
Tucker smirked. “What did you do about Morgan?”
Trying not to look guilty, I replied, “Nothing.”
“You’re just going to push your feelings for her aside?”
I stared at him, not wanting to get into this conversation. I was beginning to regret telling him how I felt about Morgan.
“When is the dinner party?”
He scoffed and shook his head, taking my change of subject with a grain of salt. “This Saturday night at six.”
“Will Charlotte still be up?”
Tucker stood and gave me a smile. “You try to act like you don’t like kids, but dude, my daughter’s got you wrapped around her finger.”
I returned his smile. “I won’t argue with you on that one.”
“She’ll be up. She doesn’t go to bed till around eight.”
“Then I’ll see you this Saturday at six.” I stood. “You didn’t have to come all the way to my office just to invite me to dinner.”
He gave me a look I couldn’t read. “I wanted to check on you. See how things were, what you had decided to do about Morgan.”
Swallowing hard, I barely nodded my head.
“See you Saturday, Blake.”
“See ya, Tucker.”
I spent the next few days burying myself in my work. Projects that I had pushed to the back
burner were moved up to priority. Ideas for a house I had been designing just for fun became my nighttime work when I couldn’t sleep. I offered to take on work other coworkers didn’t want to be bothered with. I did whatever I could to keep Morgan out of my mind.
It was working too. As the days went by, I was forgetting how she smelled. What she tasted like. How the sound of her laughter made joy pulse through my veins.
I even asked a friend of mine, Rose, to accompany me to Charlie and Tucker’s dinner party. She was more like a friend with benefits. We liked to have a good time together, but when we needed that occasional dinner date or companion to a social event, she was my go-to girl, and I was her go-to guy. We hadn’t hooked up in almost a year, though. Hell, I hadn’t been with anyone but Morgan in the last year. At the time I invited Rose, I didn’t even think about Morgan being there. Of course she would be there, and I was a stupid asshole for not realizing that. It was a party for her brother and her best friend.
When she walked into the living room and glanced down at me on the floor with Charlotte, she smiled. Then she saw Rose, her entire body went rigid, and the light from her baby blue eyes dulled.
Rose stood up. “Hi! I’m Rose, Blake’s date.”
I closed my eyes briefly and wished like hell I had informed Rose she was just a friend tonight.
Morgan’s eyes darted down to me, then back up to Rose. She played it off and smiled. I couldn’t help but wonder if I was the only one who noticed it was a forced smile.
“It’s a pleasure to meet you. I’m Morgan.”
“Blake has never mentioned you. So how do you know Nash and Kaelynn?”
My stomach jumped as Morgan bit into her lip, trying not to show the hurt on her face.
Picking up Charlotte, I stood and cleared my throat. “Morgan is Nash’s sister and Kaelynn’s best friend. Morgan, Rose is a friend of mine.”
“Nice to meet you, Morgan. It must be so cool having your best friend marrying your brother.”
Morgan nodded. “Yes. It’s fantastic.”
“Morgan is an art therapist,” I said, pride radiating in my voice because, dammit, I was proud of her.
Rose drew in her brows. “What is that?”
“Art therapy is a form of expressive therapy in which patients use creative processes as a way to explore their feelings. I specialize in veterans. Post-traumatic stress syndrome, things like that. They aren’t normally the chatty types, so art works better.”
“Wow, that is an amazing job. It must be stressful.”
Morgan shrugged. “It can be. What do you do?”
Rose wrapped her arm in mine as Charlotte reached out for Morgan. I leaned out and let her take the squirming baby from my arms. Clearly, Rose didn’t get the hint when I introduced her as a friend.
“I’m an architect. Same as Blake.”
Morgan nodded. “I see. Have you two known each other long?”
Rose chuckled. “We met when Blake moved back to Austin. A year and a half or so? We instantly hit it off when he started working at our office.”
I groaned inside. Rose was putting on a show, making it seem like we were an item. That would not sit well with Morgan. If she thought I had been seeing someone and slept with her, it would piss her off. Or hurt her. I didn’t want either to happen.
Before I could say we were just friends again, Charlie walked into the living room. “Dinner time, y’all.”
Scooping Charlotte out of Morgan’s arms, she smiled. “I’ll go put her down for the evening. Everyone, make your way into the dining room.”
Tucker followed Charlie as they disappeared to put their daughter down for the night.
When we walked into the dining room, I did a quick survey of the table. Place cards. Charlie would have place cards. Holding my breath, I watched where Morgan went. They’d seated her next to Kaelynn. Across from her, though, was Rose. I sat down next to Rose and across from Jim, another best friend of ours from college. His new wife, Terri, yet another college friend, sat next to him. They had only gotten married last fall, but they had been dating since our days at the University of Texas. It appeared all of my friends were settling down and getting ready to pop out a kid or two.
“Blake, how are things going at the firm?” Jim asked.
“Good. I’m up for partner, so things have been stressful. Beginning to wonder if I even want it.”
Rose squeezed my hand, and my gaze jerked to Morgan. She looked away.
“If they don’t give that promotion to Blake, then they don’t know who they have working for them,” Rose stated as if she were the proud girlfriend.
Gently pulling my hand from hers, I gave her a look that said to tone it down. I was hoping she would know that meant to lay off happy couple gig. Everyone here knew I wasn’t seeing anyone seriously.
Unfortunately, Rose didn’t get my hint. She shared tales of cocktail parties, dinners gone bad, and last year’s Christmas party, when we ended up locked in the elevator of the hotel.
“We were in that elevator forever. But we made good use of our time,” Rose said with a smile.
“I don’t know if playing games on our phones was good use of time,” I added, trying to save face. Truly, nothing had happened between us that night.
Morgan sat there the entire time, smiling and laughing at each story. It seemed like she didn’t care I was here with another woman. Was it possible she hadn’t felt the things I felt that night? Maybe it was time I realized this stupid fantasy of being with Morgan was simply that. A fantasy. She only wanted me for the one night. That was it. The thought made my stomach roll.
Rose put her hand on my thigh and started moving it up. Seems she wasn’t playing a role after all. For a moment I thought about letting her keep going, then I put my hand on hers and pushed it off. Maybe that would give her the hint. I picked up my drink and drank it all in one gulp.
THE FIRST HOUR, Blake had seemed uncomfortable. He would steal glances my way, then look away when our eyes met. I had to admit, the moment I had seen he had brought a date, I’d felt a pain in the middle of my gut. That night we had spent together had been beyond amazing, and I was hoping he had felt it too. When he never called or texted after the one time, I knew he must not have. I’d acted so casual the morning after, but I was confused and freaked out by the feelings I was having.
Then, seeing him here with Rose, I realized he couldn’t have sent a clearer signal.
Had that night really meant nothing to him? Sure, he put on a good show. Whispered sweet words into my ear, touched me like I was the first women he had ever made love to, and treated me like a princess when it was time to fall asleep.
In the end though, it was a night of pleasure shared by two friends who’d agreed that when it was over, they would go back to being friends. No strings attached. What I hadn’t bargained on, though, was that Blake was seeing someone. From the stories Rose told, they seemed to be an on-and-off couple.
I tried like hell to not let Rose bother me, the way she touched Blake or whispered in his ear. I attempted to ignore the way her hand moved under the table. At one point, though, I swore he had pushed her hand away. After that, Rose seemed to back off.
Taking a long drink of my wine, I stood to excuse myself from the table to help Charlie and Kaelynn clean up. I didn’t even bother to look at Blake. Somewhere around the midpoint of dinner, he had starting knocking back more alcohol and had withdrawn into himself. I needed distance too. I thought I would be okay seeing him, and I probably would have if he’d come alone. It was seeing him with another woman that had thrown me.
“Hey, are you okay? You seem like you’re a million miles away,” Kaelynn said, handing me a plate to dry.
“Sorry. I’ve had a lot on my mind the last few weeks.”
She nodded but gave me that same knowing look she always gave me. Kaelynn had a way of being able to read me when everyone else around me couldn’t.
We’d washed and dried a few more plates when I heard Rose laugh.
I rolled my eyes and sighed.
“You don’t like Rose?” she asked.
Snapping my head to look at her, I opened and closed my mouth at least four times. It was hard lying to Kaelynn—like I said, she could always read me.
“That’s not true.”
She frowned and tilted her head, giving me that look that said, Really? I know you’re lying.
“Fine, she annoys me a little. She talks so much. Do we really care if she and Blake were stuck in an elevator for three hours?”
“But Morgan,” Kaelynn said in mock admiration, “they made good use of their time!”
I scoffed. “Ugh, who does that? Who brags about sex like that?”
Kaelynn shrugged. “Blake made it clear nothing happened between them. You’re sure you’re not bothered by something else?”
“Like what?” I asked, taking the last plate from her.
Wiping her hands on a towel, Kaelynn turned and faced me, leaning her hip against the sink counter.
“I saw the way you and Blake looked at each other when you walked in. I couldn’t help notice how nervous he was when Rose talked, and the two of you can’t stop looking at one another.”
“You’re seeing things, Kaelynn.”
I absolutely hated lying to my best friend. But would it do any good to tell her Blake and I had slept together? It wasn’t like it would happen again.
She stared at me longer. “What?” I asked.
“Morgan, it’s okay if you and Blake like each other.”
Laughing, I replied, “Like Blake? Are you kidding me?”
Nash walked into the kitchen, making both of us jump when he asked, “What are y’all talking about?”
My cheeks heated, and my pulse raced. I was not going down this path of keeping secrets. Nash had done that with Tucker when he secretly dated his sister, Lily. Things didn’t work out between them when Lily ended up cheating on Nash, but Tucker had been furious when he found out Nash had been hiding the relationship. I couldn’t do that to my brother.
Wait. What am I worried about here? There was no relationship. There is no Blake and me.
Adore Me Page 7
