by Kendall Ryan
He doesn’t say anything, but when I glance over at him, his jaw is set firm and I can see his pulse pumping in his neck. I have no idea what he’s thinking. Crap, I said way too much. I just admitted I've always wanted to fuck him. Great...now he's going to think I'm obsessed with him. Not that that's far from the truth.
I open my mouth to tell him never mind, I’m just going to go home. But instead I start rambling like I always do when I’m nervous. “When you suggested these three lessons, I was so happy, but now I’m feeling sad that it’s over, and I’m sorry because I know you don’t do relationships.”
He exhales slowly, audibly, in the otherwise silent room.
I’m sure he’s about to shoot me down, tell me all the reasons why we can’t be together. My brother would never allow it, or I’m too young for him, or he might just agree with me that he’s not looking for a relationship.
But instead of doing any of that, he rises to his feet and begins pacing across his bedroom.
Then he stops abruptly and looks down, seeming to realize that he’s still naked.
He grabs his boxer briefs and puts them on. “This is too important of a conversation to have naked.” He smirks at me.
“S-should I get dressed?” I ask.
Shaking his head, he steps close. “No, you’re perfect the way you are.”
He stands directly in front of me and lifts my chin, holding my cheek in his large palm while his thumb skims along my skin. I take a deep breath, preparing myself for the sting of his words. I’m sure he'll try to let me down easy, but it still feels …
“You’re right. I don’t do relationships. I’ve never found the appeal. But these past few nights with you have been incredible. So even though I don’t know what I’m doing when it comes to relationships...I’ve always wanted you too. And now that we’ve started this, the last thing I want to do is stop.”
I blink my eyes, sure I just imagined what I heard. “What are you saying?” A few hopeful butterflies are already waking up in my stomach.
“I'm saying, let’s do this. We owe it to ourselves to at least try and see where this goes. We have a great time together. In bed and out of it. And I’m sure as fuck not ready to let you walk away and date one of these dickheads from that website.”
I giggle, delirious happiness bubbling up inside me. Until my thoughts drift to my brother. “What about Hayden?” I frown, chewing on my lip.
“You let me deal with that.”
Somehow the knot of worry in my stomach eases. I have no idea what will happen next, but I trust Hudson. I always have. And if he says he can take care of it—take care of me—then I believe him.
I fall into his arms and we share sweet, tender kisses and even sweeter words. My thoughts still darken whenever I think about what my brother’s reaction to all of this will be. But Hudson is here for me. Whatever the future holds, he's on my side.
“You want to try Sebastian’s again?” Hudson asks, placing a kiss on my forehead.
I chuckle. “I’m not ten anymore … we don’t have to go for ice cream.”
“I know. But our last date got cut short. And I want to take you out...in public. With me. Hold your hand and feed you bites of dessert.”
“What if we see Hayden again? Are you going to disappear on me?” There’s a worried note to my voice, no matter how cool I’m trying to play this new relationship thing we’re navigating.
He sits up, pulling me up with him. “I’m not going anywhere.”
If Hayden saw us out together, reeking of sex, he’d punch Hudson in the face. Not that Hudson couldn’t defend himself, but still, it’s not a scenario I care to dwell on. But I see in his expression that Hudson’s set on this idea. Maybe he just wants a do-over, to paint some good memories over the awkward one from a few days ago.
“Can I borrow a T-shirt?” I ask.
“Of course you can.”
Thirty minutes later, we’re once again standing in line for ice cream cones. But the atmosphere couldn't be more different than last time. Hudson holds my hand the entire time we’re in line, and when he leans down to place soft kisses against the back of my neck, murmuring that he loves seeing me in his T-shirt, I almost melt into a puddle. Our date is happy instead of bittersweet, openly affectionate instead of secretive. The future is all spread out for us to choose from, like the ice cream flavors in their big inviting tubs, every option bright and sweet. Everything this transition means—leaving the bedroom and acting like a couple in public—is nothing short of a dream come true.
Epilogue
Hudson
One Year Later
“Stand still,” Hayden mutters. “Your bow tie is more crooked than a dog's hind leg.”
I laugh, jostling his hands even more. “And you're picking up some seriously hokey shit from Emery's mom.”
He grins. “What can I say? Her Midwest-isms are catchy.” He finishes adjusting my tie and slaps me on the shoulder. “I still can't believe you're getting married, dude. And before me, too. How the fuck did that happen?”
I know what he means. If someone had told me last year that I'd find a girlfriend by now—let alone a wife—I would have laughed in their face. And then probably punched them. I didn't understand why or how a man could tie himself down like that.
But Gracie showed me that a good relationship doesn't tie you down. It sets you free. It means that you'll always have someone there to support you. It gives you a space to be yourself without being alone. To try new things together and fuck up and laugh about it and try again.
Ever since we were kids, I'd always had feelings for Gracie. But I didn't understand just how deep they ran. And when I started to realize it, I instinctively fought the idea. Love was a drug, a trap, a trick that only other people fell for. My being in love with Gracie would change everything. I'd have to give up my playboy lifestyle, Hayden wouldn't trust me anymore, and Gracie's heart would probably end up broken.
But it was already too late. From the moment we first kissed, her tongue eagerly stroking mine in that crowded nightclub hallway, I had started changing...for the better.
Then, on the night of our last lesson, I couldn't deny the truth any longer. Seeing Gracie cry over me had felt like a gut-punch. I know you don't do relationships, she said, and instead of nodding along, I realized something: I genuinely wanted one. I wanted to try. I wanted to learn. So I let her know that it was her turn to become my teacher. And she did. She showed me how to love—in her own way, full of laughter, passion, and heat. I never knew something could feel so all encompassing. She was my first thought when I woke up and the last thing on my mind when I drifted off to sleep. It was her name on my lips when we made love, her very being imprinted on my heart. It was love with no guardrails, and I fell hard and deep for her.
Now I'm standing in a cramped church dressing room, wearing a tuxedo, ready to make an honest woman out of her. With my closest friend by my side.
That last part still feels crazy to me sometimes, even though it's been almost a year since I manned up and came clean with Hayden. I told him I wanted to date his kid sister—real, serious dates, not just hands-on sex ed. That dinner was one of the most awkward things I've ever sat through. But somehow, instead of the train wreck I'd expected, it was only a minor speed bump in our friendship. And two hours after I proposed to her, Hayden had called me to demand why I hadn't asked him to be my best man yet.
Maybe it worked out because he saw how crazy I am about Gracie. My feelings were so obvious that Hayden knew deep down, that I could never hurt her. He saw it in my eyes and he heard it in my voice, so rather than punch me in the face, like I was expecting, he sat there and listened to my every word.
“You guys are still getting dressed?” Beth pokes her head in, looking frazzled but proud. No force on Earth could have kept her from being Gracie's matron of honor. “It's showtime. Get your asses out there.”
We both swear and hurry down the back hallway to the main chapel. We reach the altar jus
t minutes before the organ belts out its first notes. A wave of nerves hits me, but they're the good kind of jitters. I can’t wait to see Gracie today.
All the guests coo as the flower girl and ring bearer appear: Beth's two preschoolers, Georgia and Austin, looking like dolls in their fancy miniature clothes. They're only four and five years old, so it's a minor miracle when they make it down the aisle without a hitch. Beth bends down, smiling and holding out her hands in encouragement, until they reach the bridesmaids' section and the safety of their mother's arms. Georgia offers a daisy to Melanie, causing another wave of aww's to sweep through the pews.
Then the music holds its breath, Gracie walks through the chapel doors...and I can't see a damn thing but her anymore. As I watch my stunning bride draw closer, every emotion crashes into me at once. She looks like an angel. With her gown's elegant, floor-length skirt, she even seems to float forward on a cloud rather than walk. Her lush chestnut hair spills over her shoulders in a riot of curling waves, natural and not done-up like I was expecting. Her cheeks and lips have been stained the same girlish, kissable pink. Her V-shaped neckline hangs low from wide, see-through straps; I want to bite her delicate exposed collarbones, push my face into the cleavage that just barely peeks out. Damn, I never thought a wedding gown could be sexy as well as beautiful. But I guess that's because the woman inside it is Gracie.
Her eyes latch onto mine as she draws closer, and she gives me a cheeky smile. She doesn’t look nervous or unsure, just ridiculously happy, and I thank my lucky stars she’s mine. All of her. Heart, body, and soul. And seeing her in a white dress right now? It’s pretty fucking surreal.
She'd look even better out of the dress, but I'll get to see that treat soon enough. My imagination drifts ahead to our honeymoon. In less than six hours, we'll be kicking back at a luxury resort hotel in Puerto Vallarta. I can sip a margarita on my beach chair and watch Gracie frolic in a skimpy bikini, the lapping ocean waves as blue as her eyes. And after the sun sets...
I'm especially looking forward to our wedding night. Not because we'll do anything new in bed—it would be hard to find a box we haven't checked yet, at least not without getting into some seriously crazy shit—but because we ourselves will be new people. We'll be making love as husband and wife for the first time. A virginity we'll lose together.
As the music fades to a close, Gracie steps up onto the altar, across the pulpit from me. I lean over to pull her near before the music dies entirely and the minister starts talking. “You still sure about this?” I whisper into her ear. “No backing out now.”
She blinks, half-smiling, as if she's not sure whether I'm joking or she just misheard me. “I'm not going anywhere.”
“Good. Because you're about to become mine forever.”
Her half-smile spreads into that beaming grin I love to see, dimples and all. “There's nothing I want more,” she murmurs.
My heart skips a beat. The minister clears his throat and I step back into place, my gaze still locked with Gracie's, ready to begin our new life.
Acknowledgments
Thank you so much to the readers who supported Screwed – my first attempt at a romantic comedy. I had a blast writing it, and was blown away by your warm reception for Hayden and Emery’s love story. I didn’t anticipate writing Monster Prick, but sometimes the characters decide for you, just as Hudson and Gracie did here. Despite having written more than twenty books, I’d never written a novella before. It made me a little nervous! But it turned out just adorable and I hope you enjoyed the story as much as I did.
A big thank you to Danielle Sanchez, Angela Smith, and Rachel Brookes. You each play a significant role in helping me on my writing journey. Each novel is different, some more difficult than others, so thank you for being there to support me.
To all of the bloggers, fans, and readers who have shared my books with others, who’ve left reviews and made beautiful graphic teasers, my heart is filled with bookish love for you. I hope you know how critical you are to this community. I’m grateful for every tweet, review, and mention. My readers mean everything to me, and I’m blessed to have your support.
To my little family. You’re everything to me.
About the Author
A New York Times, Wall Street Journal, and USA Today bestselling author of more than a dozen titles, Kendall Ryan has sold more than a million ebooks and her books have been translated into several languages in countries around the world. She's a traditionally published author with Simon & Schuster and Harper Collins UK, as well as an independently published author. Since she first began self-publishing in 2012, she's appeared at #1 on Barnes & Noble and iBooks charts around the world. Her books have also appeared on the New York Times and USA Today bestseller list more than two dozen times. Ryan has been featured in such publications as USA Today, Newsweek, and InTouch Weekly.
Website: www.kendallryanbooks.com
Facebook: Kendall Ryan Books
Twitter: @kendallryan1
Pinterest: www.pinterest.com/kendallryan1
Coming Soon
Bait & Switch, Alphas Undone Book 1
Love is a trap, a trick only other people fall for. Former Navy SEAL Nolan has no such illusions. The only things real in his life are his beloved bulldog and the two women who regularly share his bed. One is light—soft, innocent, and tender touches. The other is dark—and gives him all of the wicked things he craves behind closed doors. It’s not cheating when each is aware of the other. But when he begins to feel much more than he ever bargained for, the order of his carefully crafted world is shaken, and he stands to lose everything.
Nolan thinks we met by chance. We didn’t. I sought him out, seduced him, and in return got the sanctuary I needed to survive. But now, impossibly, I’ve fallen in love with him. I don’t care that he has another lover, because when he finds out who I am, it’s going to ruin any chance I ever had with him anyway. She’s the least of my worries.
Bait & Switch is Book 1 in a new contemporary romance series by Kendall Ryan. It will be released on February 9, 2016.
Other Books by Kendall Ryan
Unravel Me Series:
Unravel Me
Make Me Yours
Love by Design Series:
Working It
Craving Him
All or Nothing
When I Break Series:
When I Break
When I Surrender
When We Fall
When I Break (complete series)
Filthy Beautiful Lies Series:
Filthy Beautiful Lies
Filthy Beautiful Love
Filthy Beautiful Lust
Filthy Beautiful Forever
Lessons with the Dom Series:
The Gentleman Mentor
Sinfully Mine
Stand-alone Novels:
Hard to Love
Reckless Love
Resisting Her
The Impact of You
Screwed
