“Never in my wildest dreams did I think that maybe she was switched. In what world does something like that happen, you know?”
A muscle jerked in his cheek. He could tell Tristan agreed with him, even though he stayed silent.
“Aren’t you dying to know, too?” Nathaniel asked him.
Could it be that Tristan didn’t want Emma? Maybe because she was sick?
Then again, Nathaniel thought she wasn’t his birth daughter just his niece but immediately felt bad for that unfair thought. He still loved his… my… our daughter even after finding out they had no blood relation. If it was about blood relation for him, he would have been quick to relinquish her, he defended him in his mind, to his surprise.
Then he realized he said “our daughter,” and he supposed for all intents and purposes, they were both their daughters.
He swung away in a jerky motion and took two steps to the window. Gazing out but not really seeing anything.
“Yes, of course, I’m curious,” Tristan said. “Why do you think I’m here? I didn’t know… Emma was sick,” he said her name almost hesitantly.
“Are you just curious then?”
Tristan sighed but ignored Nathaniel’s question.
He sighed again and finally said, “Even if I wasn’t interested, which I am, I made promises, which I haven’t kept, albeit through no fault of my own.
“But still, I haven’t kept them. Shay was everything to me, everything… So yeah, I’m a lot more than just curious.”
Tristan
He hadn’t kept those promises, Tristan thought. His sister’s baby had never heard her voice or even his; she had never heard how much I adored her mother, and how amazing she was, and how she was his best friend and a superhero to him.
Someone else had taken her home. At least he knew she hadn’t gone home with parents that didn’t care. Somehow down to his bones he knew, without being told that Nathaniel would have taken care of Shay’s baby the way she would have wanted.
And wasn’t that the crux of the matter. Whether he liked it or not, Emma was Shay’s child, his blood. The only remaining link in this world to his beloved sister.
Tristan finally looked Nathaniel in the eyes and said, “My sister died and never held her baby, and now through some sick cosmic joke neither have I.”
“Trust me ‘curious’ doesn’t even, can’t even begin to cover my feelings.”
“But it’s a good a place as any to start.”
“We both know the hospital’s interest is in spending as little money and getting as little bad publicity as they possibly can,” Nathaniel said.
“I don’t care about them; I care about my child and doing what’s best for her,” Tristan said vehemently.
“I’m what’s best for her,” Tristan added to make sure the other man wasn’t getting any funny ideas.
Nathaniel
“Me and you, have to work something out, something that works for us. We can’t worry about the hospital. Plus, I would really like to avoid press intrusion as well.” Nathaniel said ignoring Tristan’s outburst.
Then it occurred to Nathaniel that he didn’t know how his other baby looked, so he asked, “Do you have pictures of Samantha? Her name is Samantha, right?”
His head snapped up. “How do you know her name?” Then he realized what he said and looked a little shamefaced and apologized.
“Sorry about that. Of course, you know her name,” Tristan said.
He could tell the man wasn’t quite ready to share. His whole body was locked tighter than Fort Knox. The man was doing a fantastic impression of being a statue.
He closed his eyes for a moment and rubbed the back of his neck. He could tell the man was trying. But even though those expressive eyes were telegraphing sorrow, curiosity, and longing, there was a part of him that wasn’t ready to share, which Nathaniel understood completely.
Seeing that other child would drive home, even more, the reality of this situation. Not that he wasn’t aware of how real this was.
“I have pictures on my phone,” Tristan replied.
They stared at each other, neither moving.
He could tell Tristan was waiting for him to make the first move. If it wasn’t totally ridiculous and if the situation wasn’t nerve-wracking, he might have laughed at the childish standoff they were having.
It was like a playground game of “I’ll show you mine if you show me yours.”
Tristan dug into his pocket and brought out his phone. He opened it so slowly he might as well have been in slow motion.
His whole posture screamed reluctance.
He came back to the table and sat down. Nathaniel pulled out his own phone from his pocket.
He could see Tristan tap his phone screen. He assumed opening his picture folder, so he did the same and went to his folder of pictures of Emma since she was born.
When he pushed the phone across, Tristan did the same with his.
“She looks like you,” Nathaniel said, surprising himself.
“Huh?” Tristan said, startled.
“Her hair.” His gaze felt like a caress. “Even her cheekbones. But her eyes, especially her eyes. I couldn’t figure out where she got them from. Her egg donor has blue eyes too, but Emma’s eyes are exactly like yours, that jade green.”
“Callahan green,” he murmured. “Shay and I had the same eyes. It runs in the family.”
“Sammy has your eyes. I guess I always figured she looked like her biological father’s side of the family, and then again, I suppose I was right,” Tristan muttered.
He turned the phone over in his hand a few times before finally looking at it. He was aware that Tristan did the same.
7
Tristan
Tristan took a deep breath and finally looked at Emma’s picture. He felt like he had been sucker-punched. Nathaniel Alexander disappeared from his field of vision. All he saw was Shay’s little girl, and there was no doubt she was. She was Shay reincarnated.
Some days, Tristan would be so thankful that he didn’t have to think about Shay every time he looked at his daughter. Although all he had to do was look in the mirror, to remember Shay. They had always looked very much alike, but he could never see anything of her… them in Sammy.
He’d always wondered how Shay had given birth to such a shy and introspective child. She had always been ready with an argument and opinion. Honest to the point of being imprudent and untactful.
“Don’t get me wrong. She was never mean, but growing up with parents who always took indirect barbs, Shay had gone the opposite direction and was always saying whatever was on her mind, always living free. She refused to live up to anyone’s expectations of her. She never let them crush her spirit,” he told Nathaniel while almost caressing his phone screen.
“I’d always wondered how she finished law school magna cum laude because she was a total wild child.”
“Then again, Shay.” Tristan looked up quickly at Nathaniel and saw him listening with rapt attention. “She had always been super smart, just nonconformist.” He chuckled.
“Sammy’s a serious child, as thoughtful as Shay had been light-hearted.”
“I always thought that she had her sperm donor’s personality. Shay never said who the father was, but after meeting you, well, I guess I see where she gets it from.”
He realized Sammy shared the man’s reserved nature and quiet determination and strength.
“Emma could have been Shannon at that age,” Tristan told him. “I can tell even from the pictures that she’s not a child that likes sitting still. Her eyes have that same spark of mischief that Shay’s used to.
“I always saw them in Shay. Right when she was about to do something, I knew I would hate it at first but would leave me laughing hysterically at the end.”
This little girl had his and Shannon’s dark brown hair and green eyes. Even her skin tone matched theirs. Sammy had always looked more Scandinavian or Dutch than they ever did with her blonde hair an
d blue eyes. Another thing he had chalked up to her unknown “sperm donor” as he liked to think of the man that had knocked up his sister. Guess he knows where she got those from, he thought, looking at Nathaniel briefly.
One thing all the pictures showed was that Emma was a very happy child, always smiling.
He wondered what she was really like, this little girl who had once been a part of Shay. Was she quick to react like Shay had been? Did she find joy in everything like Shay had? Did she have the stubborn streak that Shay was very proud of? Did she get that crinkle in her nose Shay used to get when she was concentrating really hard?
He touched the phone gently and sighed when he realized he wasn’t really touching her face.
He looked up, unaware that his cheeks were damp with tears. He was touching one of the pictures on the phone. His fingers shook as he traced Shay’s daughter’s face. “She’s beautiful,” he moaned. “Looks just like every picture of Shay I have at that age.”
He finally looked at Nathaniel’s face and saw him swallow, and realized the man was suffering as much as he was.
“She looks so much like me it’s eerie,” Nathaniel said.
Nathaniel looked him straight in the eyes and said, “I can’t imagine how you feel, especially with your sister being dead.”
He tried taking a deep breath, even though he felt like his lungs had shut down and his throat was constricted and said, “Samantha is my daughter. I love her with every breath in my body, but ... but this child, she’s Shay’s mini-me.
“I just realized she’s all I have left of Shay, and I’ve never even seen her before.” He couldn’t help the sob that escaped.
He saw the sister that he had loved and lost in Emma.
He had to meet Emma Violet Alexander, hear her voice, her laugh. He had to be part of her life.
He was sure Nathaniel was feeling the same way as he was. One way or another, he had to be a part of Emma’s life. They had to figure it out.
“How do we do this?” he asked Nathaniel. “I’d like to meet her.
“Do you live in the area?”
Nathaniel replied, “I live in Palos Verdes. What about you?”
“Hidden Hills,” he told him.
“Did you bring her with you?” Tristan asked him.
“No. She’s home. I hired a nurse alongside my nanny to watch her.
“What about Samantha? Where is she?” Nathaniel enquired.
With a little reluctance, he told him, “She’s with her godfathers. Her nanny had exams today, so she’s spending the day with my best friends.
“I don’t want to go to court if I can help it,” Nathaniel said. “The press is like vultures when it comes to my company, and so far, they haven’t been able to get much on my personal life. I’d like to keep it that way.”
“Trust me. I’m not looking to court the press. I left that life behind with my parents. I have no intention of giving them anything on me,” Tristan responded.
“You know the hospital is ready to pay a fortune just to keep us quiet,” Nathaniel said.
Tristan laughed bitterly. “And you think I’m in this for the money, Mr. Fortune 500.” He sneered at him.
“Might I remind you I’m not the one that poked this hornets’ nest, Mr. Alexander?”
Nathaniel laughed. “Wow, way to make my name sound like a four-letter word.”
“I don’t want money. What’s more, I don’t need it. Sammy and I are doing just fine,” he said. Which was an understatement, but the smug asshole didn’t need to know that. Between the money from Shay’s life insurance, her job, and investments, they would have been okay, but Shay also had her inheritance from their grandparents. His came in when he turned twenty-five, no matter how much his parents tried to make it otherwise. His business was doing extremely well. They were definitely not lacking for funds, not that Mr. Hottie with a Body would know that.
Dammit, Tristan, he mentally rebuked, how is hottie with a body an insult?
He heard Nathaniel scorn, “Everyone wants money, Mr. Callahan.”
“Look, I’ve told you what I want. That’s all I have to say. But if we can’t be civil, we can go through the lawyers. Schedule visitation and all that shit.”
He saw him flinch. “No! No! That’s definitely not what I want.” Nathaniel replied.
But he noticed Nathaniel still hadn’t apologized for calling him for lack of a better word, a gold-digger. What a dickhead. Fucking prick.
“These are our kids. We certainly don’t want the courts deciding their futures,” Nathaniel said.
“Samantha and I have had enough of going to court to last a lifetime,” he said without thinking.
Nathaniel raised an eyebrow in question.
“My parents are Class A assholes,” he replied. “They tried taking Samantha away from me after Shannon died, contesting her will and guardianship arrangements. Fortunately for me, the courts ruled in my favor.
“I wasn’t going to let them take Shay’s child. She would have died all over again if her daughter ended up in that emotional wasteland.”
“Are they going to be a problem now?” Nathaniel asked.
“I’m not sure, but I’ll ask Ben. See what he thinks. I doubt it though. I’m sure the initial ruling will stand.”
“Ben?” Nathaniel said.
“Yeah, he’s my best friend, Teo’s dad, and he’s a lawyer.
“Anyways, where do we go from here?
“I’d like to meet her. Emma. I’m sure you’d like to meet Samantha.”
Nathaniel nodded.
“I meant what I said at the start of this meeting. You can’t have her. She’s my daughter. She loves me. I’m her dad.”
“On that, we both agree. I’d die for Emma. Nobody is taking her away from me. So you can put that out of your mind,” Nathaniel responded with forcefulness.
“That’s at least one point we firmly agree on,” Tristan assured him right back.
“So what do we do?” he asked.
“We can set up a visit, like a playdate, something they’ll understand. It has to be at my place. Emma has her nurse there, and I’d feel more comfortable protecting her from germs and such. I had the house thoroughly cleaned and sterilized.”
Tristan nodded in understanding and asked, “Have you told Emma anything about what’s going on? Anything about what happened?”
“No. Have you?” Nathaniel returned.
“Nope! Even if I’d wanted to, which I didn’t, I wouldn’t have known how or where to start.
“How do you even explain that to a four-year-old?” He wondered out loud. He looked directly at Nathaniel, “She has a picture of my sister, her mom. She knows she is in heaven. Well, as much as she understands what that means. She knows I’m her dad. How the fuck do I introduce you?” he said, getting angry all over again at the FUBAR-ness of the situation.
“It’s going to confuse her if I suddenly announce she isn’t my daughter at all. And oh wait, that she has a new daddy.”
Tristan had imagined that conversation since the day he’d gotten that God-forsaken letter. Every time he thought about it, he felt nauseous.
He couldn’t just shake the foundation of Sammy’s life, even though someone had taken C4 to the foundation of his.
“Let’s all meet first,” he advised, while doing his best to conceal his own apprehension.
He hoped like hell it was less scary when they knew who they were.
“Sometimes I wonder if they’ll even understand it when they’re much older,” Nathaniel mused.
“Anyways, let’s all get together. Samantha is just a new friend for Emma to play with,” Nathaniel suggested.
“Don’t worry,” he said. “The adenovirus infection isn’t contagious anymore for Samantha.”
“I can do Saturday,” Tristan told Nathaniel.
“That’s good for me too,” he replied.
For a microsecond, Nathaniel thought what if Tristan didn’t agree to the request? There was no “what
if.” He had to agree. He might not know the man, but he also knew the right thing to do. If he didn’t, he wouldn’t have taken in his sister’s child.
So he took the leap and said, “Oh! And I took the liberty of putting all the doctors’ information and stuff about the virus that you would need in a folder. I also added information about liver transplants. The doctor’s number is in there. You know, for when you want to set up an appointment for the compatibility test and all.”
“I figured, even if you were a horrible human, you’d still want to save a child. So I planned in advance,” Nathaniel admitted with a sheepish look on his face.
“Thank you, I think,” he replied while distractedly thumbing through the very detailed folder he had somehow missed when Nathaniel walked in. He’d give it to the man he left no stone unturned. There was so much information here, color coded and organized alphabetically, Tristan was in awe. At least he knew Nathaniel was meticulous. Especially in regards to Shay’s daughter’s health.
“So, Saturday,” Nathaniel prompted, snapping him out of his page flipping.
“Yes… That’s fine,” Tristan replied with a note of hesitation that Nathaniel couldn’t miss.
“Maybe we should exchange numbers too, so I can keep you updated on what the doctors say, and you know to sort out the details for the playdate. Either way, I’ll give them permission to share all pertinent details with you,” Nathaniel told Tristan.
“Also, I can text you my address for Saturday,” he added.
“Of course,” Tristan replied
He handed Nathaniel his phone, and he stored his number while he did the same.
He looked up at him, wanting to ask a question, but he wasn’t sure how.
“Spit it out,” Nathaniel said, reading him a little too easily for his comfort.
“Would you send some of the pictures of Emma to me, please. I’ll do the same of Samantha.”
“Yes Tristan, I will,” he replied softly, “and thank you.”
They walked out of the conference room with Nathaniel’s hand on the small of his back guiding him towards the elevator. They ignored the lawyers except to let them know they would be in touch.
A Family For Keeps Page 5
