“Oh. Yeah, okay. That would be great.” Just like that. She’d been avoiding Gemma for weeks, and now she wanted them to have dinner? “Thanks, Mom.” She kissed Janice on the cheek.
“There’s Sam.” Janice waved at Sam Tura, who ran the gym and the diner. “I have to go now and sit in the single-old-fogey’s section.”
Her mom jingled away while Gemma stared after her. What was going on? Except for that sadness in her eyes, she was acting like nothing had changed—as though Hal hadn’t died, and Gemma hadn’t found out her mom had kept her father a secret from her for her entire life.
Am I crazy?
Maybe it was her. Maybe Gemma was the one who was nuts, and everyone else didn’t get it because they were still normal. Maybe a switch had tripped, and she’d gone crazy since John came to the library to talk to her about the details of Hal’s will. Now Gemma had a million questions and no answers. She’d looked through some of the papers after Dan left and found a box all dated after Hal and Dan’s dad were in Sanctuary. Reports from when Gemma had been a child, about Bill Jones and what he was doing. Concerns he might be up to something more than he claimed. Hal had been reporting to someone about Dan’s dad, watching the man.
She hadn’t found anything in there about his temper or any of the things he’d been doing to Dan’s mom or the then six-year-old Dan. Not one reference, when Gemma knew for a fact there had been incidents back then. The school teacher, the nurse, the doctor, the sheriff. None of them had done anything to help Dan.
The one she was most disappointed in was her father. He’d been an observer to Dan’s life, but not man enough to help a little boy who’d been hurt over and over again? Why was Gemma the only one who’d known?
“Excuse me.” Someone strode past her, not even giving her eye contact.
Gemma wondered if she was invisible, and not for the first time. She projected whatever she projected, but no one really saw her, and now she had ruined the best thing she’d had going. First she’d sent her best friend away. Now Shelby was getting married. Things would change, as they should when her friend joined her life with Elliot’s, but that didn’t mean it would feel good to be alone again.
She’d always had Dan as a fallback. Now she wouldn’t even have him to talk to.
Gemma turned in a circle. A crowd of people in their Sunday best, waiting for a wedding. Her town, happy and content. They thought they knew her—that she was just the librarian. They all got to go about their lives and be fine, while Gemma’s artist soul wouldn’t let her be satisfied. Something in her cried out for…more than this.
Her gaze met his, where Dan stood with Elliot beyond the front row. She wanted to smile back but couldn’t. He didn’t need to know more about his dad, but maybe they could still salvage their friendship. Because as much as she’d wanted to let go of him and live her life, Gemma had to face the fact that she needed him. Maybe as much as he’d seemed to need her. Dan tipped his head and motioned for her to get out of there. Gemma shot him a smile, glad they were still okay, and spun to see Olympia headed her way. She met up with the woman and took the tongue lashing she deserved.
Shelby stood with Elliot’s father in an alcove where no one could see them, taking the last of their pre-wedding photos together. The bride frowned. “There you are.”
“Sorry.” Gemma rushed to her place.
“Don’t know what you were doing,” Olympia huffed, coming up behind her. “Standing in the middle of everything like a ninny.”
“I’m here now, aren’t I? Let’s get this show on the road.”
Shelby frowned, but Gemma motioned to her that everything was fine. Shelby knew she cared, that Gemma was happy for her, and that was enough. Gemma really liked Elliot, and he was good to her friend. So what was Gemma’s problem? Was she really so selfish she couldn’t let her friend have her day without Gemma bringing her own drama into it?
Gemma thought about it as she walked down the aisle without tripping. If that was You, God, then thanks. She wasn’t above thanking God for something as simple as her not falling on her face.
Dan’s eyebrows crinkled into a frown. A smile played on his lips, and the notes were sweet, endearing. Before long he pronounced the married couple as Dr. and Mrs. Elliot Noel, and everyone stared while they kissed. Gemma couldn’t look at Dan. She didn’t want to know if he was looking at her. And if he did, it was likely he’d see everything she felt right there on her face. Just like every romance novel she’d ever written, the girl would give everything away, and the guy would know he just had to sweep her off her feet and she’d go with him.
But that wasn’t going to happen to her. Maybe there was some kind of always-the-bridesmaid thing that meant single authors of romance novels never found love like they wrote about.
The crowd cheered. Gemma jerked out of her daydream and clapped. She looked across the rows of chairs filled with Sanctuary residents.
The mayor stood at the back, by himself.
Staring right at her.
**
“Smile,” John said. “Otherwise people will think you’re mad at me for giving you a speeding ticket.”
Dan kept a straight face. “Who says I’m not mad?”
John’s smile dropped. “Seriously?”
Dan couldn’t help but laugh. “Don’t worry about it, Sheriff.” He clapped the guy on the shoulder. “No harm, no foul. I’m thinking about helping with some landscaping at the library and the school. You know, for the children.”
And had nothing to do with the fact he’d get to see Gemma. The idea had come to him when he’d woken that morning. She’d played the lead in his dreams, where he mowed the grass for her, and she brought him a lemonade. The kiss part would have to wait.
“Good for you.” John grinned. “Nice wedding. That extra line, ‘until Jesus comes for us’ instead of the ‘death do us part’ stuff was good. I should’ve thought of that.”
Dan took a sip of his soda. He did like weddings, even though part of him held himself distant from it because he knew he would never experience any of this except from his side of the proceedings. All it would ever be was a gift to his friends.
But not today. “Did you see the mayor earlier?”
John sipped his own drink. His eyes drifted across the crowd of people. “Left right after the service. With Janice, if I’m not mistaken.”
Dan had seen Collins staring at Gemma. The man didn’t need to bother her or get anywhere near her. The feeling rose up in him, inexplicably. Collins needed to keep a distance from Gemma. “Antonia is missing, also.”
John’s eyebrows rose. “She is?”
Like John didn’t know. He held so much close to his shirt that it made the sheriff hard to read sometimes. “Last I heard, Shelby thought she might be involved with the mayor.” Romantically, if Shelby was right. Not a couple that made any sense. Antonia was wild, but she was young. Why spend time with an old man whose health was failing?
“Is that gossip I hear from you, pastor?”
Dan pressed his lips together. “Just another wayward sheep to add to my prayer list.”
“Okay, fine.” John indicated toward the food tables. “Less people over there now that it’s been picked over. Let’s go.”
Dan picked up a new plate even though he was full. There was one deviled egg and a couple of pieces of watermelon left.
John stood close to him, got a plate, and added a couple of carrots then twice as much dressing as anyone would need to dip them in. “Yes, Antonia is missing. Or at least just not here today, but she hasn’t been around for a day or so. I’m not at the point I’m seriously worried something has happened, but I am close to it. I’ve got Mei out looking for her, since Mei doesn’t like weddings.”
Dan shot him a look.
“And since she’s also not really a people person.”
Dan smiled. “I might’ve noticed that, but I decided to let it go since she pulled Gemma out of the hole in my yard. So that’s it, Antonia’s missing?”
“Yes and no.” John paused. “Back when the mayor first started acting weird, I noticed he paid…uh…extra attention to Antonia. I talked to her, and she was amenable to getting close to him and passing me information on the basis that if she gets even an inkling that she’s not safe she tells me, and I get her out.”
“She’s undercover?”
John shrugged. “She wants out… of Sanctuary… and she needs money to do that. I’m helping her get set up in the outside world as soon as she’s done, and in exchange she’s doing this for me. Two more months and she’s leaving.”
“Does her family know?”
“She refuses to confirm whether she’s told them or not, which probably means she hasn’t, and she just didn’t want to tell me that.” John shrugged one shoulder. “I don’t want to believe her plan is to leave without telling anyone. It’s not a good idea.”
“Not just because it leaves you in the awkward position of explaining to everyone your involvement.”
“She promised me she’d be telling her mother.”
Dan shot the sheriff a look. “Do you think the mayor knows she’s not a genuine admirer?”
“I can’t get a read on him,” John said, scanning the area with his gaze even though the mayor had left. “I don’t think she’s blown, but then where is she? She was supposed to be here so we could talk. The only variable other than the mayor is the possibility that she might’ve made a move and exposed herself.”
“He has guys, too, doesn’t he? Men who agree with him.”
“Yes. I know who most of them are because Antonia fed me their names, but there are holes in my information. The mayor barely speaks to me since he announced he wants my brother in cuffs for assault.”
“Mmm.” Dan nodded slowly while he chewed warm deviled egg. “I can see how that might hinder your fellowship.”
John snorted. “Right.”
“I’ll keep an eye out for Antonia.”
“Thank you.” John studied him openly. “Sure you’re okay?”
Dan didn’t want to rehash their last conversation, so he said, “Tell me about your brother, Ben. The man clearly has more secrets than anyone should lay claim to. How does that affect your relationship, knowing there’s so much he will never tell you?”
John thought for a second. “I take what I can get. I’ve never understood Ben. Even as a kid he was distant, shared what he wanted to share and no more. It can get under your skin, but then I see him with Pat and ‘Uncle Ben’ comes alive in the eyes of that little boy. Then secrets don’t seem so important.” John sighed. “I think he likely did assault the mayor, but I can also tell you he didn’t do it without good reason. My brother has never done anything in his life without good reason. And he’d lay it down for any of us.”
Dan nodded. He didn’t even know what it felt like to be the recipient of that kind of love from another person. What would it feel like to be able to give that to someone? The richness of it escaped him in a way that made him want to grasp at smoke, trying to capture it in his palm. Gemma. She filled everything that he was. Papa had brought her into his life. Dan wanted to believe that was for a reason.
After all they’d shared, there had to be a reason. And not just because he’d been attracted to her for years. What was between them was so much more than that. She could be everything in his life—his whole reason—and that was what scared him so much. Papa should be his everything. If Gemma was such a part of his life that he thought about her even this much, did that mean he was losing his grip on God? Dan wanted to ask John about it, but the words just wouldn’t come.
“Everything okay?”
He said, “You keep asking me that.”
“You usually don’t have this look on your face like there are a million things going on in your head.”
Dan groaned. “I think I need to walk to the lake and pray for a while.” He needed to find the balance between his relationship with God and a relationship with Gemma. Because she could break up with him as friends, but he wasn’t going to let her take away everything else they could be.
Whether she ever told him anything about his father, or not, didn’t matter. That wasn’t what Dan wanted from her.
“Okay you’re looking a little scary now.”
“John?”
“Yeah?”
“How do you get a woman to change her mind after she broke up with you?”
**
Gemma strode over. Dan opened his mouth, but whatever he’d been about to say next, she cut off. “I need to talk to John.” She crossed in front of him and faced the sheriff. “Can I talk to you?”
John blinked. “Uh…sure.” He shot Dan a look and then said, “Let’s go over here.”
Good. She didn’t want Dan to hear. If he’d told John anything about the room she’d found in the radio station, then she wanted to know. She needed to know. It was her secret. But she couldn’t just ask that outright. She squared her shoulders and faced the sheriff. “How are you?”
“How…am I?”
“Yeah.” She couldn’t ask? “Andra? The boys?”
“Uh, good. Thank you.” John seemed to think that was hilarious.
“And Dan?”
“You can’t ask Dan how he is yourself?”
“I could, but you were just talking to him.” She should have been a reporter. “So how is he?”
“Seems to be okay. Should I be worried about him?”
“Not unless he gives you a reason.” If Dan wasn’t going to tell anyone else, she wouldn’t do it for him.
“What about you? Took a spill last week.”
She shrugged. “A little achy, that’s all. Can I ask you something?”
“Sure.” The sheriff looked like he found this entire conversation completely hilarious.
“How much did you know about Hal and how he came to town?” It was tricky, given John had only lived in town a couple of years. And unlikely that he knew more about the man than she did, though he had access to all those files in his office. He would know who Hal had been before he’d come here, wouldn’t he? Who Dan’s dad had been, even. Official things she’d never have heard because once people got here, no one talked about that.
John frowned. “He arrived with another man, a Bill Jones. But there isn’t any information on who that is, or why they came together.”
Gemma absorbed the fact there was a solid connection between her father and Dan’s—and that it wasn’t good. “What about after they arrived?”
“You know who Bill Jones is.”
Not a question. Gemma didn’t know if she’d have answered even if it was.
“Gemma.”
She didn’t glance at him. “It’s Dan’s father.”
“Hal helped out a lot, monitoring communications in and out of town before he was killed.”
“He did?”
John nodded. “Hal maintained the phone connection internally, and when the town got internet he added oversight of people’s allowance.”
Which meant he listened in on everyone’s phone calls. But the internet thing made no sense. “They book their time with me, at the library.”
“Hal monitored what they spent that hour doing, and the Marshal’s Service got a record of it. Couple of times people tried to look up old acquaintances or family members—check their Facebook page to see what they’re doing, that kind of thing. Harmless, you could argue, but it is a breach of their witness protection memorandum.”
“He kept tabs on everyone?”
“For security.”
“But what—” She could hardly believe he would do that. It burned through her like betrayal. Maybe even more than his not having told her he was her father. He snooped on them as if they were just like Dan’s father.
“These people have a right to privacy! You can’t look at their internet time and police them like big brother.”
“Actually we can. Each one of them signed away their rights to privacy and the freedom to go wherever they
want and do whatever they want. It’s the price of their safety.”
“And me?” She waved her arms around. “I was born here. I didn’t sign up for this life.”
“You have the freedom to leave at any time.” John paused. “Would you like to leave, Gemma?”
“Not today. Don’t you know my best friend just got married? What’s wrong with you?”
John grinned. “You need to ask me anything else?”
She ignored John’s humor and glanced at Dan to make sure he wasn’t listening. He was talking to Olympia. “Dan didn’t say anything to you about… well, about his father?”
John’s head jerked. “No, and I’ve gotten the impression that’s an out of boundaries topic.” There was a knowing look in his eye, as though now he knew about Bill Jones, and he intended to cross that boundary.
“It is off limits.”
“Why?”
“I was just curious whether he’d mentioned his dad to you.”
“No, I mean why is it out of bounds?”
“If he hasn’t said anything…” She stepped back. “He didn’t tell you anything about his dad?”
“No. Nothing.”
Of course he hadn’t. Though that didn’t preclude John’s looking the man up for himself—especially now he had a new name to search for. Still, she said, “Good. That’s good.” She nodded, more to herself than him. “It’s best left alone, John.” Gemma backed up and nearly bumped into a table.
“Whoa, there.” John held her elbow in a soft grip. “You realize it would take me about two seconds to interrogate you to the point you’d confess everything, right?”
“And that’s why I’m going to walk away, and you’re not going to ask me anything else about this.”
“Did you pick a new genre yet?”
“I’m thinking about it.” Gemma took a breath, grateful for the change in subject.
“What did Dan’s dad do to you?”
Gemma opened her mouth. She stopped herself before she spoke, then shook her head. “It’s not about what he did to me.”
“But he did do something.”
Sanctuary Forever WITSEC Town Series Book 5 Page 7
