“I—somehow managed...to fall in love with the woman who called herself Rose Collins.”
Chapter 15
Abbie awoke to a full onslaught of humiliation and devastation. Memories of last night’s Harvest Ball came rushing back the minute her eyes opened. Standing on the band platform next to Matthew should have been the happiest day of her life—one she would never forget. As it turned out, only the second part was correct. She would certainly never forget it.
She rolled over in bed and pulled the covers over her head. Matthew had known all along who she was. He had played her for a complete fool. And she couldn't even blame he for his betrayal because she had no one to blame but herself. How could she have been so gullible? How could she have been so blind? Why hadn’t she followed her aunts' advice to take things slow? She knew why. She knew exactly why.
She had convinced herself that this holiday was the only chance she would ever have in her lifetime to find real love that wasn’t overshadowed by her father’s money. Real love she could trust and know that it had nothing to do with Daniel Livingston and everything to do with her. But she could see that her reasoning was faulty now and love did blind a person to the truth. Lesson learned.
“Abigail, your father is due to arrive at any minute. Don’t you think you should get out of bed and get dressed? It’s always better to meet adversity head-on and hiding under your bedcovers isn’t the way to confront your father.” Aunt Jeannie’s muffled voice penetrated through the bedcovers.
“Leave me alone. I don’t care if I ever leave this bed again.” she called out from beneath the darkness of her sanctuary of quilts.
“Nonsense, you are a Collins first and a Livingston second, now get out of that bed at once.” her Aunt Lila demanded. “At once.”
Suddenly, her sanctuary disappeared and standing next to her bed were both of her aunts. Their solidarity would have been touching under other circumstances, but there was nothing anyone could do now to fix the mess she had made of her life.
They all heard the front door slam and her father’s voice bellowed up the stairs. “Abigail! Jeannie! Where is everyone?”
Abbie’s heart felt like it had stopped completely. With any luck, it would. She held her breath hoping if she held it long enough, she would simply keel over dead. That would teach her father to meddle in her life. And, as far as she could see, it was the only way out of this mess.
“Jeannie! Where the hell is everyone?” Her father’s voice ebbed in and out as he looked for them downstairs.
“You better stiffen that spine of yours, young lady. Cowering doesn’t become you.” Then her Aunt Jeannie turned toward the door and yelled. “We’re upstairs, Daniel. And please stop bellowing. You sound like a street vendor.”
Aunt Jeannie turned to her and grinned. “Always take the initiative, Abigail. Never give your opponent the advantage.”
Suddenly her father appeared in the doorway. His red face gave every indication he might be the one to keel over at any moment. There was no doubt in her mind he was as angry with her as he had ever been. She could only assume her traitorous, almost fiancé, had managed to deliver his report to her father. She had no idea how Matthew could justify his behavior to his employer, but she had a report of her own to give. Always take the initiative, Abigail. Never give your opponent the advantage.
Abbie shot a glance to her aunts still standing in her room. Aunt Jeannie looked a bit nervous, but Aunt Lila was scanning the room for something. Abbie guessed she was looking for a household item to use as a weapon to replace her trusty teapot. Well, if they were brave enough to face her father on her behalf, she owed it to them to at least try to fight her own battle.
She jumped out of bed and turned toward her father in the doorway. “So, you have the nerve to show your face to me after what you have done!" she screamed at the top of her lungs. His demeanor changed from angry to shock. Then she turned to her aunts.
“Aunt Jeannie and Aunt Lila. Will you please excuse my father and I? We have some very serious business to discuss.” She could tell Aunt Jeannie wasn’t certain she knew what she was doing by sending her allies downstairs to fight her adversary alone. She grimaced to her aunt. “I’ll be alright, Aunt Jeannie. And if you should hear loud voices or the sound of glass breaking, please don’t be alarmed. Father and I will just be coming to an understanding.” Abigail’s gaze lit on her, Aunt Lila, and then back to her father’s as her aunt’s scurried past his formidable form blocking the door.
“Please come in, Father. Sit down anywhere you like.” She invited him into her bedroom as if she were entertaining guests for tea in the parlor. She wished she had listened to her aunt and had gotten dressed this morning before confronting her father. She could admit now she would have felt more in control, but there was no going back now, so best to get on with it. She swore after today, she would listen to every single word her aunts said to her.
“Abigail, I— ” Her father said before she cut him off.
“I asked you to sit, Father. And I refuse to speak with you until you do.” She had never in all her born days spoke to either of her parents in this tone, but desperate times demanded unusual tactics.
Her father took a chair by the window. Abigail took her place on the vanity stool.
“Now, young lady, I’ve met your demands. Will you please tell me what on earth has been going on with you since you left home? I’m disappointed and worried all at the same time.”
Abbie could tell her father was both angry and concerned. Her inner little girl wanted to rush into his loving arms and tell him all about the mean man who broke her heart. But the grown-up woman in her said you did this to yourself, now be responsible.
She supposed she could take a little pity on the man. After all, he had caught the first train all the way from Philadelphia to see about her welfare. He was a good father, but—
“Abigail? Talk to me,” her father demanded.
She looked into her father’s worried gaze and realized she had too much at stake to waiver. She had to stand her ground.
“I’m sorry you’re disappointed in me, Father. That is the last thing I would ever want, but— ” She wanted to choose her words carefully.
“But what, Abigail. What’s this all about? Why did you and my sister lie about who you were? I mean, I know why you did it, but I don’t understand your reasoning behind it. Not entirely.” She could tell her father was frustrated. Well, so was she.
“I’ve explained my position to you...my feelings...to you over and over and you just dismiss me time and time again. It’s like you don’t trust me to be able to make my own decisions.”
“Well, I would think after this little holiday to Durango, you would admit that perhaps I was right not to trust you.” her father snipped.
“Touché father. But don’t you see? It’s because of you that I’m here.”
“Me? I’m the one who adamantly opposed this little holiday of yours. And when I get home, your mother and I are going to have an understanding.”
“It isn’t Mother’s fault. It’s mine. Don’t you see, Father? I’m not a child anymore. I’m a grown woman and I can no longer allow you to keep me in your gilded prison any longer.”
“Prison? Abigail, you can’t be serious. You have more opportunities than any other person on this earth. You have the best clothes that money can buy. You have the best education money can buy. You travel abroad anytime you wish...and first class, I might add. There’s nothing that your mother and I deny you, so how can you say you are kept in a prison?”
“You deny me freedom, Father. Can’t you see that? I’m not ungrateful for all the blessings your hard work has afforded me. Not in the least. But with all the money you have to spend on me, it is also a barrier to the thing I desire most.”
“A barrier? I don’t understand.” Her father’s face wrinkled in confusion.
“No, I can see how you wouldn’t, so let me explain.” Her anger had cooled, so she approached her fathe
r and stood before him. “Father, I love you and Mother more than life itself, but you know that with your money comes risks. You worry about the risk of something happening to me physically like someone kidnapping me and holding me for ransom. But what about the risk of the heart. What about the risk of me falling in love with someone who is only in love with your money.”
Her father frowned. “In love with my money? What are you saying, Abigail? That your suitors are not courting you, but my money? That’s impossible, Abigail. Look at you. Can’t you see how stunning you are? Why, a man would be an imbecile to not want an intelligent, beautiful woman like you by his side.”
She smiled at her father’s blindness. “Love can make us all blind, Father, and you, more than anyone, are blind when it comes to me. You see me as a beautiful young woman that you love, and raised to be an intelligent woman so when you are gone from this life, I can take care of myself. But that’s your point of view. Mine is quite different.”
She pulled her father’s hand in hers. “I love you and I respect you, but you don’t see what I see. Young men swarm around me like bees to honey all the while they have one eye on your wallet. I’m not faulting them for that. It’s what is expected of them just like you expect me to marry well. I don’t want to marry well, Father. I have money. You’ve seen to that. But what I do want is to marry with the certainty that the man looking at me is only seeing me. Can you understand my position? Even just a little bit?”
She watched her father’s expression. He was thinking about her situation and she just prayed he was open-minded enough to at least give her point of view some consideration.
He finally looked up at her and he saw tears shining in his eyes. “Abigail, I’m so sorry I haven’t been more sensitive to your concerns. You’ve indicated to me many times you wish you could be someone else just for a little while and I never understood what you meant.
“But I can see now just how much this holiday meant to you—not the holiday itself, but the opportunity it brought to learn what it’s like to be appreciated for the person you are and not the person you are kin to.”
He stood and opened his arms to her. She did not hesitate to walk inside his loving arms. She shed a few tears of her own as she snuggled in the warmth of her father’s love.
She wasn’t certain how long they just held each other, lost in their own thoughts when the sound of a door downstairs pulled them apart.
Her father smiled at her and wiped a tear from her cheek with his thumb. “Alright, Abigail, now that I understand more fully the reason why you lied, could you please tell me about you and Matthew Bellamy. What really happened between you two?”
Abigail turned away from her father. “I don’t want to talk about the man you call Matthew Bellamy. He lied to me. He told me his name was Matthew Bell.”
“Well, that was my fault. When I hired him to keep you safe, I told him under no circumstances was he to let you know who he was or why he was here.” Her father had the good sense to look chagrined.
“Well, he most certainly followed your instructions. Because he lied and lied and lied.”
“Now, wait a minute, Abigail. That’s not fair. You lied to him too. He had no way of knowing who you were. He didn’t know Rose Collins and he certainly didn’t know who Mrs. Randall was. All he knew was Abigail Livingston and Mrs. Jeannie Wentworth. He had spent the last few weeks worried to death that something had happened to the two of you. He inquired of every person in this town trying to find you.”
“Father, I think he was playing you too.”
“No, Abigail. He had no idea who you were until he received my telegram last week.”
Abbie’s heart stuttered. “Well, of course, he knew. He had to know. I mean— ”
Her father gave her a knowing look. “Matthew Bellamy is an honorable man, Abigail. If he had known you were my daughter, he would have never allowed himself to become personally involved. He would have never allowed things to go so far. He told me what happened, Abigail. All of it.”
She closed her eyes in embarrassment at the knowledge her father knew what she and Matthew had done under the willow trees.
She couldn’t allow her heart to soften towards Matthew. “I suppose he’s blackmailing you now...promising to keep quiet about what he and I did if you’ll pay him a ridiculous sum of money. I knew it. It’s always about the money.”
“Abigail. Stop. Not everyone is after my money. Matthew Bellamy certainly isn’t. He is as devastated as you are right now, and for the same reason.”
“Because he thinks I’m after his money? Father, please. I’m guessing he doesn't have much or he wouldn’t be so quick to criticize those who have. He has made it quite clear— ”
“No, not because of money. Because he thinks you lied so you could have your rich girl holiday. So that you could have your fun without damage to your reputation. Then, you could go back and tell all your rich friends about your tryst with a man beneath you, and you could all laugh about it while sitting inside your fancy mansions on the hill.”
“He said that?” Abigail couldn’t believe it.
“He said that,” her father confirmed.
“I don’t believe it. He had to have known who…” But now that she thought about it, he had been so open and loving until...
“He didn’t have a description of you. And he had no idea your middle name was Rose or that your mother’s maiden name was Collins. He didn’t know your Aunt Jeannie’s husband was Randall. He didn’t even have a good description of you. We had been interrupted the night I hired him by a business emergency, and he boarded the train the next day. He and I both just assumed you would be easy to pick out in a crowd. And, we were right.”
“What do you mean the two of you were right? I thought you said he didn’t know who I was until he received your telegram.” Abbie’s hopes faded a bit.
“He said he picked you and my sister out immediately. That’s why he chose the seat across from you and introduced himself as Matthew Bell. And he was right, wasn’t he?”
“Then what changed?” She had to know what had happened.
“After the train ride with you, he was convinced you were not Abigail Livingston, but Miss Rose Collins. By then, he was already smitten.”
“He was?” She hated the sound of hope in her voice, but she couldn’t deny it.
“He was. And you don’t know the whole truth.”
“I don’t?”
“No, by the time my telegraph arrived, he had already spent a small fortune on an engagement ring for you. He had planned to ask you to marry him during the Harvest Ball—well, not you, but Rose Collins.”
“Yes, I know. We had talked about that, but after his revelation at the ball, I just assumed he had planned the whole thing. He broke my heart, Father.” Abbie admitted.
“Well, you broke his too.”
“I did?”
“Yes, you did. You lied to him about who you were, and he felt like it had all been a game on your part. So, if you are serious about the way you feel about Matthew, and if you believe in your heart that he loved you before he discovered your lies, then your holiday appears to have been successful. Wouldn't you say?’
“I don’t see how, Father. I’ve ruined my reputation and Matthew hates me. He believes I was just a rich girl playing games with his heart.”
“Or you could look at it this way, daughter. A young man fell in love with you when he had no idea about my money.” her father pointed out.
Abbie’s heart fluttered. “You’re absolutely right, Father. But what can I do now? I’ve ruined everything. Besides, you will never give me permission to marry the man.”
“And why is that?” Her father frowned at her.
“Because he’s not…you know, he doesn’t come from money.” She stammered.
“Why, Abigail Livingston. If I didn’t know better, I’d say you were a snob.” Her father said. She could tell by his surprised expression he was shocked by her words.
�
��Not me. I’m not a snob. I just thought…you might be.”
“Abigail, I want you to be happy and if Matthew Bellamy makes you happy then I’m his best champion. I haven’t always had money and you know that. Matthew is a good man and I obviously trusted him enough to send him after you, although not exactly how I had in mind,” her father joked.
When she didn’t find the humor in the situation, he took pity on her.
“Sweetheart, I’m not going to advise you on matters of the heart, but I will say this, if you love Matthew as much as you say you do, then why don't you propose to him?
Abigail stared at her father as if he had suddenly grown a second head. “Propose? To Matthew? But how? He would never—I mean it’s unheard of...it would be a scandal...wouldn’t it?”
Her father grinned and shrugged. “Would it? I suppose this is where my money comes in. I can make it happen if that’s what will truly make you happy. It’s your decision.”
Abbie stared at her father. She still loved Matthew with her whole being, but she was scared. What if she gathered her courage and proposed to him and he didn't accept? What if he turned his back on her like he did at the Harvest Ball?
The only way she would know for sure was...she looked up into her father’s face. “Make it happen, Father. Please make it happen.”
Two weeks later...
Matthew sat in his office staring out the window. He heard a train whistle off in the distance and it reminded him of the ring in his desk drawer he had bought for a beautiful young woman with gold and green eyes—and a black heart.
He had left the ring in his hotel room hoping the housemaid would take it. Instead, she turned it in, and John Kingston had returned it to him. He had shoved the envelope with the ring inside into his desk drawer and hadn’t laid eyes on it since. But he knew it was there mocking him as the fool he was.
“And what about yourself? Still moonin' over the Livingston lass?" Gus’s Irish brogue cut into his misery.
The Debutante's Holiday: Western Historical Romance (The Debutantes of Durango Book 6) Page 14
