The stillness of the house was punctuated by the ticking of the grandfather clock at the end of the hall. Sticking his head out the door, he was pleased to find that it was half past eleven, enough time to give Immanuel a chance to be up and about when he arrived. As he climbed the steps to his bedroom, Adam Fenice stopped mid-step at the sound of a gentle rapping on the front door. Retreating, he smoothed his jacket and hair before cracking open the door to meet the bichrome gaze of Immanuel Winter. The tainted soot and sulfurous snow lazily whirled past him, ruffling the curls hanging at the edge of his forehead. With a shiver, he rubbed his arms and shrugged his scarf closer to his chin.
“Immanuel, get inside before you catch your death!” Adam cried as he pulled his companion in by the arm and shut out the cold. “Did you walk all the way from Wimpole Street? You shouldn’t have walked here after what happened yesterday. You are in much too fragile of a state to be walking through snow and murk like that.”
A smile played on the German’s lips at Adam’s fussing. “Don’t worry, I did not walk. Dr. Hawthorne gave me the day off to recuperate, so he dropped me off on his way to a crime scene. Apparently, Jack struck again last night after he decided to pay me a visit. They found the body this morning.”
“Good lord. Who was it this time?”
“I don’t know.” He unwound his scarf and wrapped it around the arm of the iron coat rack, revealing a veil of gauze encircling his neck. “It was a woman though, like the first time.”
“Do— do you know who he is?”
“The man who attacked me was the same man who kidnapped me. He went after me to tie up some loose ends. At least now that he knows it will not work, he probably will not come after me again.” He smiled bitterly. “Thank the lord for small miracles.”
Adam swallowed hard, unconsciously rubbing his wrist. “You must be freezing. Let me put the kettle on.”
Leading Immanuel into the parlor, his eyes fell on the dwindling fire in the hearth. As his companion settled into an armchair, Adam knelt before the grate. The flames had died away, leaving only the fading embers to warm the room. With the bellows in his hands, he mechanically stoked the fire and added more wood until the fire swelled, but his mind was on the man who had grabbed Immanuel by the neck the night before. He had seen his companion in a grave state only days after his escape, yet what happened finally became real when the man appeared on the porch. His faceless tormentor existed. He had a name, he had a life, and he was still in the city. Somehow, he had found Immanuel, and Adam was powerless to stop him. Adam’s chest tightened as anger and fear wrapped around his ribs and set his heart pulsing to a frantic pace.
“What is the name of the man who hurt you?”
Immanuel froze at the sight of Adam’s face. His eyes had hardened, darkening with a single-minded resolution he had not seen in him before. “If I tell you, you have to promise not to do anything rash. You have seen what he is capable of. There is no way you could survive if he went after you.”
With an effervescent grin, Adam dismissively waved his hand, but the manicured smile died away when he saw the fear in his friend’s eyes. “Don’t be ridiculous. I—”
“I am serious, Adam. I will not tell you who he is if you are going to foolishly endanger your life.” His hazy eye glistened, and Mr. Fenice blurred into smears of red and dove grey, rippling with each blink. As Adam stood, he caught his hand and held it tight. When their gazes met, Immanuel mutely urged him to squelch his temper. “You saw what happened when I stepped out of line. I could not bear to know I was the source of your destruction. What would I do without you?”
Wrapping his other hand around Immanuel’s, the redhead softened and curled his lips into a faint smile. If it had not been for the window behind them, he would have stooped down and kissed him, but that would have to wait. “I promise I will not do anything to the man,” he paused, “unless you tell me to.”
Immanuel scratched his neck over the bandage and bit his lip but knew he had to tell him even if he still worried he may try something drastic. “His name is Lord Rose. He is the head of the London Spiritualist Society.”
“That man Miss Jardine has been spending time with?” Adam asked with wide eyes as he took the adjacent chair. “Does she know?”
He shook his head. “No, but I told Dr. Hawthorne last night about what happened with Lord Rose. Surprisingly, he believed me. I did not expect him to, but he did not seem to trust him even before I told him about how he found me at Oxford.”
“What are you going to do about Emmeline? You cannot let her go off with that lunatic.”
“I know, I know. Dr. Hawthorne does not want me to say anything yet, but maybe she would listen to me if I presented the right evidence. After all, he kidnapped her too.” Immanuel chewed on his lip and sighed. “The thing is, I do not know if she will believe me. Last night, she came in after you left and asked me how we were connected. I told her about what happened in Oxford, and she finally remembered me after I covered the side of my face. Are the Hawthornes invited to spend Christmas at your sister’s fiancé’s house?”
“I believe so.”
“Maybe I can talk to her then. I do not think she will be visiting the Spiritualist society until after Christmas anyway.” The house was silent apart from the crackling of the fire and the ticking of an unseen clock. “Is your sister home?”
Adam cleared his throat. “No, she is at Lady Dorset’s dealing with wedding business. Linens, flowers, food, things of that nature.”
“Is she looking forward to the wedding?” he replied, resisting the urge to scratch his stitches.
“Not really. She wants to marry Lord Sorrell, but all the planning and fussing over flowers and linen really is not her—” His eyes widened as they fell on the growing red blotch on the side of his companion’s neck. “Immanuel, your neck is bleeding!”
Touching the wad of gauze, he drew his hand away only to find his fingertips covered in a thin coating of fresh blood. “May I use your lavatory? If you have any gauze, I can clean myself up.”
He nodded and quickly led Immanuel up the stairs. On the third level, he walked him to the door across from his bedroom. The bathroom was nearly pitch black without any windows, but when Adam flipped on the gas lamps, he found a cozy room fitted with a cast iron tub and pristine porcelain fixtures against striped, green wallpaper. As Immanuel washed his hands, his host darted out of the room. After peeling off his jacket and removing his borrowed tie to keep from ruining more of the doctor’s clothing, he unwound the gauze from his neck. Using a clean portion of cotton, he gingerly wicked and wiped away the blood around the stitches.
“I found some dressings in Hadley’s workshop. I hope it is enough,” Adam said, his voice pointed with worry, as he bustled in with a roll of gauze and a pair of scissors. “How bad is it?”
Immanuel inspected his wound in the mirror and confirmed the blood was dripping from the corner of a loosened scab. “Not very. I’m just a bleeder.” Taking the fabric and scissors from his companion’s hand, he cut a swath and folded it against the wound. “Would you be willing to wrap the other piece around my neck for me?”
He nodded and carefully tethered the wad of to his throat, but as he tied and tucked the end under, a stirring of guilt tugged at his stomach when his fingertips lingered on the delicate flesh. “I’m sorry for fighting with you yesterday.”
“It’s all right. I was angry, but I understand the need for discretion in public. It is just that I was really looking forward to being with you.”
As Immanuel reached to retrieve his tie, Adam put his hand over his. The words worked free of his mouth, silencing his righteous conscience. “We can now. It will be a while before Hadley gets home.”
“Really?”
When the German’s face lit up with a hopeful smile, Adam nodded and trailed the edge of his hand across Immanuel’s cheek. This man with his thin face and cracked cheek had been the reason he cried for the first time in a decade. A young man
he had scarcely known a month had affected him more than his brother had after a short lifetime together. Looking into Immanuel’s eyes, he saw the possibility of happiness and a place where he could lay his soul bare. No one had held him so wholly. With a kiss, he had bewitched him into betraying the façade he built up to please the world. There was no way he could convince himself he could change and love the prescribed sex. No woman would ever make him feel like he did around Immanuel. Matilda Meriwether had moved on and so had he.
A shudder of electricity passed through him as he brushed against his companion’s cool lips before pressing against them, drawing him into an embrace. The moment their bodies touched, Immanuel latched on, wrapping his thin arms around his neck and into his hair to keep the redhead close. As Adam coaxed Immanuel’s lips to part and deepened the kiss, the taller man tried to steady himself, but his legs faltered. His heart pounded with sudden panic, yet it only made his flesh pulse at each point he and Adam’s bodies met. Before he could put his hands out to break his fall, Adam’s arms tightened around his waist and supported his frame against the bathroom wall. Energy hummed and raced between the two men, enlivening their nerves and tugging every hair on end. Immanuel drew in a trembling breath when his companion’s tongue grazed his lip, inhaling the fragrance of his pomade and lavender cologne. Resting his head against the wall, Immanuel smiled and met Adam’s gaze as he broke from his lips. His light eyes ran over his friend’s ashen face, which had flushed from exertion, to his shaking hands as they twitched against the nape of his neck.
“Are you all right?” Adam whispered as Immanuel’s body slipped lower in his grasp.
“Yes, I am just a little weak from last night and weak-kneed because of you,” he chuckled through strained breaths. “Can we sit down? I still cannot stand that long.”
“Of course. My room is right across the hall.”
***
With a harrumph of exacerbated self-control, Hadley tossed her carpet bag onto the bench beside the door and strode down the hall toward the office as she pulled off her damp hat and gloves. “Adam, you would not believe how close I am to eloping. If Lady Dorset asks me to pick from five indistinguishable shades of white again, I will scream. How can anyone tell them apart? Does it even matter which one I pick if they all look the same?”
Reaching the threshold of the study, Hadley’s rant abruptly stopped. His desk was empty. Where could he be? Glancing over her shoulder, she confirmed his coat was still on the rack and mounted the steps. If he wasn’t home, at least she would be able to fill a few last minute automata orders. As Hadley crossed the hall toward his room, she sighed when she spotted a tie and jacket slumped on the floor in front of the tub. Shaking her head, she snatched up the clothes and pushed opened his door, ready to dump them on his bed when she froze. For a second she thought her brother had fallen asleep in his clothes when she realized Immanuel Winter was pinned beneath him. Their legs intertwined as Adam planted a trail of kisses down his companion’s bandaged neck. Immanuel gripped his arms, but when he turned his head, his eyes shot open upon seeing Miss Fenice in the doorway clutching his jacket.
“You left these!” Hadley called as she dropped the clothes and her face reddened nearly to her hair color.
Before her brother could react, she turned and dashed down the hall. Cursing under his breath, Adam jumped off the bed and buttoned the top of his shirt and straightened his tie. His face pinkened to match his sister’s as he tidied his hair and clothes at his mirror, leaving Immanuel on the coverlet to slowly fix his own clothing. Adam’s heart pounded as he rubbed his wrist and walked half out the bedroom door before turning back to meet Immanuel’s guilty gaze.
“Now what do we do?” he asked, running his hand over his pomaded hair and pacing between the cloaked window and the open door.
“I don’t think she is angry, just surprised to find us like that.”
“Should we leave or should we just pretend like nothing happened?”
“Why don’t we talk to her? She already knew how we were before,” Immanuel whispered as he retrieved his tie from the floor where it dropped from Hadley’s hand.
“I can’t talk to her about— about this!”
Immanuel sighed as he went to put on his jacket but left it on the bed. “Then, I will.” Adam opened his mouth to protest, but he held up his hand to silence him. “We cannot stay up here forever. We will have to face your sister some time.”
His heart climbed up his throat as he descended the steps, hoping what he knew of Hadley Fenice was true. It seemed she had an inkling about their relationship when he came to bring Adam his gloves after their first kiss, but when she saw them kissing and wrapped in each other’s arms, did she change her mind? If she did, then at least he could be a buffer between his companion and rejection. When he reached the bottom of the staircase, he found her sitting on the fifth step with her hand across her brow and her face still flushed with embarrassment. The stairs creaked as he reached her side, and she finally met his eyes but quickly averted her gaze.
“I’m sorry,” they uttered in unison.
“No, I am the one who should be sorry. I should have knocked.” She looked past Immanuel, but the stairs were empty. “Where is Adam?”
“Upstairs, too ashamed to come down.”
She sighed. “I will see if I can convince him to join us. The three of us need to talk.”
When Hadley reached her brother’s bedroom, he was staring out the window with his arms barred across his chest and his eyes hard with the only emotion that could block out his fear. The moment he turned to meet her, he was ready to reproach her, but his sister drew closer until they were nearly touching before adopting the same fire in her eyes.
“Don’t make a scene in front of Mr. Winter before you even know what I am going to say, Adam. What did I tell you when I came back from Palestine? I love you, and I do not want any secrets between us.” Taking his arms, she uncrossed them before holding his hands in her own. “Let’s talk about this together.”
Adam exhaled. The anger ebbed while the fear stubbornly remained as a weight in his head and stomach. Even with his twin sister, he had never openly discussed his sexuality. When she brought it up, he fled and refused to speak to her for weeks. A part of him still couldn’t accept it, so how could she? But if he didn’t talk about it this time— if he couldn’t speak about it this time, he would be denying his feelings for Immanuel. He had rebuffed him with his actions in public, but could he reject him aloud? Following his sister down to the foyer, he found his partner at the newel post waiting for them. Immanuel mustered a reassuring smile as they took their seats at the kitchen table.
“Miss Fenice, I hope my presence here did not create tension between you and your brother,” Immanuel began, locking eyes with Adam’s twin. “I never meant any disrespect. I just—”
“I told him you were going to be out for a while.” His sister regarded him with the same softened gaze she had the night she discovered his secret. She accepted them even if he didn’t. “I thought we would be safe here. I wanted to spend some time with him, especially after what happened last night.”
Hadley sighed. “I am not cross or upset with either one of you, but I do not know how to handle this situation. If one of you was female, I would have to object to what I saw upstairs, but I am uncertain how to approach this. You are both adults and can do as you please, yet I hope you are moving toward a more... intimate relationship for the right reasons. You have only known each other for a few weeks.”
“I like Immanuel very much, and I have gotten to know him over those weeks. You know we are not strangers to each other, Hadley, so don’t act like everyone is utterly chaste. I’m sure you and Lord Sorrell—”
“Have only kissed,” she retorted as her henna brows furrowed to match her brother’s.
“Maybe I can explain it better.” The Fenice siblings slowly sat back and turned to the blonde man who bit his lip as he composed himself. “Yes, we are moving quickl
y, but when you are in a relationship like ours, you never know when it is going to end. One false move and we can be beaten or arrested for something beyond our control. A man and a woman have a prescribed set of steps they move through when they are a couple: courting, engagement, marriage, parenthood. When they are married, they can be intimate or share a household together, but we can never be married, which means, according to society, we can never be together. We never have an acceptable time to do all the things we desire. If we are found out,” Immanuel’s voice cracked at the thought, “we must part, possibly for good. A relationship like ours can only end in heartbreak, so we try to hold onto a normal life when we can. I am sorry if we offended you by publicly displaying our affection, but since you know how we both are, your home is the safest place for us.” He put his hand over Adam’s and stroked his barely freckled skin. “I wish we could have a relationship like the one you have with Lord Sorrell. For our relationship’s validity and morality to not be questioned or scorned, I would give anything.”
Hadley’s blue eyes roamed from her brother’s face to Immanuel’s, noting the light of a smile that gleamed in their eyes when they looked at each other even when their faces never hinted at their love. How many times had she looked at Eilian like that when they were in the desert together while she was disguised as a man? It had never crossed her mind to mask her feelings for him, yet her brother and Mr. Winter had to every day. To deny her love for him had been the worst pain she had ever felt, and if she had been a different woman who lacked her experiences beneath the desert sands, she would be giving the edict that would destroy these men. No, she could not do that even if the rest of the world would tell her she was making the wrong decision for the sake of morality. Society would not unravel at an act that only affected the two participants.
The Winter Garden Page 19
