What the Heart Wants

by Kelli McCracken

  “I’m sorry, Dylan. I tried, but my life and my job were hectic.” Nate pushed his chair back and stood up.

  Dylan’s eyes raked him from head to toe. His son was angry, but Nate could see pain there, as well. “You couldn’t make more time to be with your son? Everything else was more important than your own kid?”

  “I didn’t want kids in the first place. Your mom made that choice.”

  “Great!” Dylan shouted as he threw his hands in the air. “So now you’re saying that you didn’t even want me. Thanks, Dad. Maybe I should just start calling you Nathaniel.”

  Dylan’s cell phone buzzed at his side. Nate waited until he finished checking it to respond. “Quit twisting my words around, Dylan.”

  Anger filled Dylan’s eyes as he stared back at him. Tough shit. His son was going to listen to what he had to say. His face softened. “Granted, I didn’t want to start a family so soon after your mother and I married, but I was thrilled when you were born.”

  “Spare me. You weren’t thrilled about my birth because you didn’t stick around after I was born. You left us.” Dylan’s nostrils flared as he turned away. “If Heaven got pregnant, I wouldn’t leave her or our child the way you left Mom and me.

  Damn it! What had his son gotten himself into?

  “Is that why you want to marry her so soon? Is she pregnant, Dylan? You know there are alternatives.”

  Dylan drew closer to the desk, balling his hands into fists. He didn’t bother looking at his cell phone when it buzzed for a second time. “Heaven isn’t pregnant, but if she were, there would be no alternative. I actually want kids, someday.”

  “God, you are so difficult,” Nate grumbled, covering his eyes with his hands. “Why won’t you listen to reason?”

  “I would listen…if you were being reasonable. Why is it so hard for you to believe that I’m in love with her?”

  “Love is overrated,” Nate said, dropping his hands from his face. “Besides, you haven’t known her long enough to love her. That sort of love takes time, not a few short weeks.”

  Dylan exaggerated his laugh. “Is that so? You’re an expert on love, now?” He snorted. “Love doesn’t have time restraints. Some people just know when it’s real, that they’ve met the one.”

  “I’m trying to save you from heartache. I don’t want you to make the same mistake that I made.”

  Dylan rolled his eyes. “It’s nice to know that Mom and I were a mistake.”

  “There you go, twisting my words around, again,” Nate chided, leaning on the desk with his knuckles. “You weren’t a mistake, but rushing into marriage was.”

  “So you’re saying Mom was the mistake.”

  “I didn’t say that, either. When I first met your mom, she blew me away with the feelings I had for her. After we started dating, I was so sure that she was all I needed. That isn’t how life works.”

  “It may not have worked like that for you, but Heaven and I have something…special.”

  Nate shook his head, letting a long sigh rush from his lungs. “Are you listening to your mother’s mystical madness, again?”

  “I know you don’t believe what Mom believes in. Hell, I didn’t at first. But that doesn’t mean it isn’t real. I know what I’ve experienced, and I sure know how I feel.” Dylan’s eyes narrowed. “Maybe that’s the difference. I know myself better than you knew yourself, back then.”

  “You may know yourself, Dylan, but you barely know this girl. How can you marry her?”

  Dylan silenced his phone for a third time. “You know what,” he began, as he took a step back from the desk. “I’m tired of arguing about this. Just because it didn’t work out between you and Mom doesn’t mean it will be my fate, as well. Heaven is my life. Get used to it. If I had to make a choice between her and all of this,” he paused as he spread his arms out to the room, “I would choose Heaven in a heartbeat.”

  “You’re being foolish about that girl,” Nate retorted. “You need to get your priorities straight and soon.”

  “My priorities are straight, Dad. I refuse to be a bachelor for the rest of my life. That may work for you, but it doesn’t work for me.”

  Nate sat down in his chair, looked over some paperwork, and jotted a few notes. “Dylan,” he replied, after an awkward silence. “I only have your best interest at heart.”

  “If that were true, you’d stay out of my life. I won’t be like you and make myself a slave to this industry.”

  Nate pointed over to awards hanging on his wall. Music awards that Sliders had won. “You enjoy all the things that this industry gives you. You don’t want for much.”

  “You’re right. And now that I have Heaven, I have everything I need.”

  Nate met his son’s dark, brooding eyes once more. “If it wasn’t for your celebrity status, she wouldn’t have given you a second thought.”

  “You’re wrong. You don’t know her, so don’t pretend that you have her pegged.”

  It was Nate’s turn to laugh. “What makes you think you know her so well? You’ve barely known her a month, and you want to marry her?”

  “Yes, I want to marry her, and I will. You can’t do anything about it. Get used to seeing Heaven at my side.”

  “We’ll see about that,” Nate snorted, moving his eyes away from his son and back to his paperwork.

  “Is that a threat?” Dylan shouted. He slammed his fists on the desk, overturning a paperclip container.

  Nate picked the container up, focusing on it instead of his son. “I’m only saying that time will prove you’re wrong. Something else will come along, and she will leave.”

  Dylan shook his head. “I can’t wait to prove you wrong.” He gritted his teeth and turned to leave.

  Nate watched him disappear behind the door as he shook his head, too. He picked up the phone, pressing a series of numbers.

  You’ll thank me one day, Son.

  * * *

  The yellow and white lines blurred together as Dylan tried concentrating on his driving. His body tensed at the thought of his dad. When would that man get over himself and stay the hell out of his life?

  Dealing with his dad was like having his life force drained by an evil spirit. The more he allowed him to feed off his energy, the more he would take.

  Trying to shake the negative vibes, Dylan’s mind switched to Heaven. His heart ached to see her, to feel the touch of her skin, to enjoy the peaceful feeling she gave him.

  Glancing around at the passing scenery, he knew he was only ten minutes from the house. With so much contempt still flowing through his veins, the last thing he wanted to do was go home and bring Heaven down with him.

  He focused on their connection, hoping to reassure her that he was okay. The vibrations she emitted spiraled through their bond, leaving him dizzy. She was worried.

  Vibration at his hip drew his eyes to his phone. He didn’t bother looking at the number. He knew it was her.

  “Hey, Hev.”

  “God, Dylan, are you okay? I’ve been going out of my mind.”

  Guilt consumed him. “I’m fine. I didn’t mean to worry you.”

  “You are not fine, Dylan. I felt your anger and it scared me. But it didn’t compare to the pain you fed me through our bond. What happened?”

  Dylan let out a sigh as he thought about their connection. He liked that they could feel each other’s emotions, but the negative vibes were troublesome. He didn’t want her worrying over him. “I was dealing with Dad. Don’t fret over it.”

  “I’m going to worry about you, Dylan, especially since I can feel your emotions. Ignoring my calls didn’t help ease my concern for you.”

  “We were in a heated discussion. I couldn’t answer. I knew why you were calling, and I tried to chill out. I really am sorry.”

  The erratic throb in their bond began to settle as she exhaled. “Why were you and your dad in a heated discussion?”

  The question was not one he was prepared to answer, seeing as how it involved her. �
�It’s a long story, and I will tell you about it when I get home. I have to make one more stop and then I’ll be there.”

  “Chelsea and I are about to leave the coffee shop. We’re going to stop by her and Kyle’s place before I come home. Promise you won’t be long?”

  He felt a little throb in their connection. It wasn’t concern this time. She missed him.

  Good. He missed her, too. “I promise you, I won’t be long. I miss you.”

  “I miss you, too. I’ll be waiting for you.”

  * * *

  It was the last place Dylan had intended to go, but he was there, nonetheless. Too much time had passed since they had last spoken. It didn’t feel right. They’d never gone this long without talking.

  When the door opened, he stared into eyes he’d known since he was a child, half expecting them to narrow. Instead, they seemed to smile.

  “Who pissed in your cereal this morning?”

  Leave it to Layne to start the conversation with a joke.

  “Do you really need to ask?”

  “Get your ass in here, dude, and let’s talk.” He watched Layne shake his head and step aside. “What did your dad do this time?”

  Dylan followed him into the living room and they both sat down on the sofa. “He’s doing what he normally does; he’s trying to run my life.”

  “And this surprises you because…?”

  “It doesn’t. It just pisses me off.” Dylan glanced away. He didn’t want his negative vibes radiating to Heaven, again. She had been through so much within the last twenty-four hours. She didn’t need to stress over his problems, too.

  “So what caused the latest argument?”

  “It was over several things.”

  “You’re going to have to be more specific.” Layne leaned over and grabbed his beer before resting his feet on the coffee table. He motioned to Dylan, to ask if he wanted a drink. Dylan shook his head.

  “Dad thinks I should be focusing on nothing but work.”

  “That’s how your dad is, Dylan. He works all the time and thinks we all should do the same.”

  “I know, but he needs to realize that I’m not him. He can push me all he wants, but it won’t change anything. Right now, my focus is on Heaven, but he wants Sliders to go on a European tour next month.”

  Layne jerked away from the back of the couch, sputter beer from his mouth. He wiped his lips as he shook his head. “Ha! Fat chance of that happening. Your dad’s lost his mind. We need a break.”

  “Tell that to my dad.”

  “Don’t stress over it, dude.” Layne propped his feet on the coffee table, again, and eased his back against a cushion. “You know Scott, Jerry and I will back you on not wanting to tour.”

  “My problem with Dad doesn’t stop there. I wish it did. He thinks that Heaven is too much of a distraction, and that I should forget about her.”

  “Yeah, about Heaven. Man, I’m sorry for being such an ass at Jerry’s. I didn’t have the right to—”

  Dylan waved off the apology. “I’m past all that. We’re cool. No harm done.”

  “You sure you don’t want a beer? We’re due for a little male bonding,” Layne teased, ducking out of the way when Dylan hurled a pillow at him.

  “Cute, man. But, thanks. I’ve missed your smack talk, too. I’d have a cold one with you, but I gotta get home soon. Heaven will be back in a little while.”

  “How’s she doing after the whole Zeke fiasco?”

  Dylan grunted as he crossed his leg over the other, his foot shaking like a solitary leaf on a cold November day. “She’s better.”

  “I can’t believe that idiot,” Layne snorted. He took a sip from his beer and shook his head. “I wish I could have seen you kick his ass.”

  “He’s lucky I didn’t kill him. Believe me, I wanted to.”

  “You don’t think this will cause problems with you and Heaven, do you? You know, like make her not want to…”

  Dylan felt his face go hot. “Um, no. Heaven and I are fine. If anything, it made us closer.”

  “Good God, dude. Don’t tell me there’s wedding bells in the future.”

  “There you go, reading my mind, again.”

  The smile on Layne’s face receded. His hand fell to his lap. “You make it sound as if you’re marrying her tomorrow.”

  “It won’t be tomorrow, but it will be soon.”

  Layne’s feet hit the floor as he sat up. “How soon are we talking?”

  “I don’t have a date, yet. Whenever I pop the question, she and I will decide then. You seem surprised by all of this. I told you before that I plan to marry her.”

  “Dude, don’t rush into this. Get to know Heaven before you make any rash decisions. She’s living with you, now. That’s not much different than being married.”

  Dylan leaned his head against the couch and sighed. “I know her, Layne. I’ve known her for a while.”

  “What the hell do you mean by that?”

  Damn. He hadn’t meant to admit that to Layne.

  “Nothing, dude. I’ll explain some other time.” He sat back up and looked down at his watch. He’d spent enough time bullshitting. It was time to get home and back to Heaven. He sensed her missing him. “I need to go. I promised Heaven that I would be home, soon.”

  Layne stood and followed him to the front door. “I hope you’re not upset about what I said.”

  “I know that you’re looking out for me, unlike my dad. I appreciate that, but it’s not necessary.”

  “I just want you to be happy. You know that, right?”

  Dylan stopped in the middle of the doorway and looked back at Layne. “I know.” He gave Layne a playful punch. “See you around.”

  * * * * *

  CHAPTER 25

  Heaven leaned against the willow tree, watching butterflies floating by as they danced at summer’s end. The woodsy scents of fall lingered in the air, promising blankets of multicolored leaves in the future. What would the weather be like in L.A.? It couldn’t compare to the warm days and cool nights back in Ohio.

  Autumn…it was the best season. What was it about the musky scent of fallen leaves that moved her soul? Maybe because it reminded her of living with her parents, or of high school football games and hanging out with friends.

  Whatever the reason, she had many happy memories this time of year. There was no way that the weather in Los Angeles could compare to that. She would ask Dylan to make a trip to her hometown so he could meet her parents and see the fall foliage.

  The haze of memories vanished when she felt her connection with Dylan cascading with warmth and want. He was staring at her, growing closer with each step.

  Had it already been two months since they’d learned the reason for their connection?

  She breathed deeply, knowing it was his breath she held within her, his breath that had saved her life the day she was born.

  His arms slid around her waist. She felt the heat of his body against her back. The scent of cloves filled her nose, teasing her senses until everything else about that moment ceased to exist. Their bodies swayed, as if their hearts played a melody only they could hear. What a beautiful love song it was.

  Heaven closed her eyes, letting out a contented sigh as Dylan swept her hair aside and brushed the nape of her neck with his lips. Their bond hummed with a slow steady vibration.

  “I love you,” she whispered.

  “I know,” he answered, “but I love you more than the air I breathe.”

  She glanced over her shoulder and into his eyes. “Show off.”

  He spun her. She pressed into him. And within a matter of seconds, the world could have ended and she’d never have known the difference. Not with the way he groaned against her lips.

  Had the Earth shifted?

  “I know one thing for sure,” he said as he rubbed his nose against hers. “I’ll never get bored with doing something as simple as holding you.”

  “I’m glad to hear that.”

  “Are you
happy, Heaven?”

  “I’m beyond happy.” She wrapped her arms around his neck. “The void I once felt has been filled.”

  “Are you sure that I’m all you need?”

  Heaven laughed softly. She swiped one of the willow tree branches from his face and pressed her palm to his cheek. “Yes, I’m sure. You can always check our connection if you have any doubts.”

  “I don’t doubt your love for me. I just worry that you’re missing out on something you might want to do, like the All Things Art program.”

  “I’m not missing out on anything I want. The art program would have been a great educational experience, but it’s not something I have to do.” Why was he bringing this up? She hadn’t talked about it since the day she met Nate. When she noticed the worry in his eyes, she wanted to erase all doubt. “I’ve always lived my life by doing what's right for me, and being with you is what’s right.”

  “Being with you is right for me, too. All I want is to make you happy.”

  The strange look remained in his eyes as he struggled to hold her gaze. Whatever was on his mind, he felt passionately about it. “You’re still upset over what your dad and Layne said, aren’t you?”

  “I’m not concerned about my dad. I don’t need his approval for anything.” He leaned against the tree trunk, pulling her against him. “Layne, on the other hand, confuses me.”

  “Why?”

  “He’s been so weird, lately. I know deep down he wants me to be happy, but he thinks we’re rushing our relationship.”

  “Do you feel like we are?”

  Dylan leaned in for a kiss. When he pulled away, his smile had returned. “No, I don’t feel like that. You and I know why our feelings are so strong, but I haven’t told Layne.”

  She hadn’t told her sisters, either, or Chelsea. “Why don’t you talk to him, explain things so he’ll understand?”

  “Because I don’t know if he will. I may tell him one day, but not right now.”

  Heaven thought back to the odd looks that Layne had given her the weekend at Jerry’s house. His uncomfortable gaze had confused her. Did Layne expect her to break Dylan’s heart?