It’s sweet, but I also bet it’s because Benjamin is a worrier by nature. I suspect sleep brings him terrible things sometimes. I’ve been woken up a few times this past week to him having what I believe to be nightmares. Restless tossing, shaking, and muttering. He would then jerk awake, seemingly gasping for breath. I’d lay still, pretending to be asleep so as not to embarrass him that I’d witnessed such a thing.
Benjamin would fall back asleep, usually after moving just a little closer to my body, sliding his leg in between mine so we were touching.
I move my foot back down Benjamin’s leg, playfully rubbing my toe against his arch. His leg jerks from the tickling sensation, and he mutters, “Go back to sleep, Elena. You wore me out last night.”
I snort. It was totally the other way around. I tickle his foot again.
Benjamin moves lightning fast, flipping to his side facing me. His hands go to my ribs, and he starts to tickle me mercilessly.
I laugh, screech, claw at his hands, kick with my legs, and try to squirm away. “Benjamin… stop it. I’m going to pee.”
His eyes are heavy with sleep, hair all in disarray. His beard is thicker in the mornings, making him look older and wiser, but it’s the devilish sparkle in his eye I cherish because I love this playful side of his.
His hands still, and he pulls me in close. Lips to my neck, he runs a prickly kiss along my skin. One of his hands takes mine, then leads it between us. My knuckles brush against something hard and velvety.
“Look what I woke up with,” Benjamin murmurs against my neck.
He takes my hand, guides my fingers around his length, then makes me squeeze. I sigh, and he groans.
Lifting his head, Benjamin pins me with his soulful eyes that are filled with yearning for me. “Don’t go to church this morning. Let’s stay in bed all day pleasuring each other.”
My toes curl over the sinfulness within his tone. More than ever, I should go to church because of how much that turns me on.
“Stay with me, Elena,” he says as he gently rubs his bearded cheek against mine. “Let me have you all day. We can watch old movies and eat junk food in bed.”
The naked want in his voice gets to me, and it’s not just about sex. He wants to spend time with me.
“Okay,” I say without any thought. “Let me just text my mom to let her know.”
Benjamin immediately lets go of my hand so I can release his cock, and I roll away from him to nab my phone off the nightstand. Pressing an elbow into the mattress, I put my thumbs to the screen and shoot out a quick text to my mom. Not feeling well this morning. Passing on church. Will call you later.
I hit send without a moment’s regret. While I love going to church—the same one I’ve attended with my family all my life—I don’t feel bad when I miss a service. My relationship with God is personal, and it extends far beyond the walls of the chapel.
I don’t even feel a twinge of guilt I’m forsaking church in favor of spending a day in bed with a man I’m not married to. My God is forgiving and wants me to be happy, and that’s not merely an excuse. I honestly believe it. I’ll gladly accept my penance after confession, because I think Benjamin needs this as much as I do.
I set my phone back on the nightstand, first turning my ringer off because today has now become Benjamin’s and I don’t want to be disturbed by anyone. I roll back toward him, only to be met with his mouth. His arms go around me, and his kiss is deep and claiming.
He’s back in my hand again, hard yet silky soft, and I start stroking him leisurely. I’m not in a rush to get him off, and the slow glide of Benjamin’s hand over my lower back tells me he’s not in a rush either.
Lazy kisses, teasing touches, soft sighs. We extend our foreplay far beyond where it’s ever gone before. I stroke his cock to the point where he starts thrusting in my hand before I retreat, then move my hands to his chest. Benjamin fondles between my legs, teasing with whispered touches that have my hips gyrating, then he stops to concentrate only on our kiss.
It seems like hours later, but there comes a time where our breaths are ragged and we’re vibrating with need. When we’re on our sides facing each other, Benjamin pulls me in close. His hand goes to my thigh, and he jacks my leg up past his hip. I reach down, take him in my hand, and guide him to my entrance. We both suck in a breath and hold it as his head breaches my wet pussy and his eyes lock onto mine just before he jams in deep.
“Damn, that feels good,” I moan as my head falls back and my eyes flutter close.
“Perfect,” he groans, then starts to thrust against me.
I just hold on, arms locked around his neck and my breasts pressed flat against his chest. Benjamin holds my leg up high, fingers digging down into me. I feel every inch of his cock claiming me, and I know how easily I can get lost in this man.
Benjamin fucks me thoroughly. He’s come to know my body well. Knows just how deep I can take it and the exact type of touch on my clit to make me explode.
I cling to him as I come, crying out my release, and Benjamin tips right over after me. I love the way he plants deep, spills into me, and shudders in complete ecstasy while murmuring my name.
Oh my… that was so good. My ears are still slightly ringing. Benjamin rolls to his back, taking my weight with him. He locks his arms around me, and he presses his face into my neck while his breathing regulates.
My eyes are heavy, and I love the idea of a lazy day. Falling back asleep only to wake up again to make love. Maybe I’ll take him in my mouth and wake him up next time, or better yet—
“Hola… Elena,” my mother calls out from somewhere near my front door. My bedroom door is closed, but her voice rings through loud and clear because she’s not a soft-spoken woman.
“Holy shit,” I rasp in shock as I roll off Benjamin, protectively bringing the sheet over my breast.
To my horror, my bedroom door opens and there stands my mom.
Five-foot-four inches of Hispanic sass and fire, Irma Costieri stares in wide-eyed shock. Her gaze slides over to Benjamin. I have no clue what he’s doing as I’m terrified to look at him. All I can do is stare at my mother as my entire body flushes with embarrassment.
Her gaze returns to me, her chin lifting. “I came over to check on you. You never miss church because you’re not feeling well, and I was worried.”
“Oh, geez,” I groan as I slap my hands over my face. I split my fingers a tiny bit to peek out at my mom. “I’m so sorry I lied. I didn’t think you’d come here.”
Now, my mother knows I’m not a virgin because we had the “sex” talk when I was in high school, which opened transparency between us as I got older. She’s seen me have serious relationships—even two where my boyfriends had moved in with me. But I’ve never had my mom walk in on me while with a man, especially not after I’d lied about why I wasn’t going to church.
“You should have just said you were busy,” my mom replies drolly, then smiles at Benjamin. “Hello.”
“Hello,” Benjamin says, and I want to smack him. I can hear the humor in his voice. When I risk a glance at him… I can tell by the expression on his face he’s not embarrassed in the slightest.
There’s an awkward silence that follows before my mom finally turns her attention to me. “Aren’t you going to formally introduce us? Or is it too much for a girl to want her mother to meet the man who is occupying her bed?”
“Mamá,” I exclaim.
She merely crosses her arms, giving me a stubborn look.
Relenting, I wave to the man beside me. “This is Benjamin. Benjamin… that’s my mother, Irma Costieri.”
Benjamin pushes himself up in bed, keeping a hold of the sheet at his waist. He sticks a hand out. “Pleasure to meet you, Mrs. Costieri.”
My mom isn’t charmed by him in the slightest. Her upper lip curls a bit in a sneer, and she refuses to shake his hand. She does at least give him a slight nod before turning back to me.
“So this is more important than church? Some man yo
u had over last night? Someone who doesn’t mean anything to you—”
I cut her off. “We’ve been seeing each other for over a month, Mamá. He’s not just some man.”
She sniffs in disbelief because this is not something I would do… hide a potential love interest. But my mom doesn’t know how disenchanted I’ve become with love. How I’ve only been engaging in meaningless sex before Benjamin.
She’s not buying it, and her disapproval rolls off her in waves. The daughter she knew, raised, and loved is not about to accept I’d keep a man secret from her for a month.
While I can’t tell her how we met or even the why of it, because she’d never understand, I can distract her from her current ire.
“Benjamin’s a neurosurgeon, Mamá.”
And there it is… her inner mother who has only ever wanted the absolute best for her daughter comes out. A smile splits her face, and she studies Benjamin with newfound appreciation.
Her hand shoots out and she takes his, giving him a hearty welcome-to-the-family shake. “Benjamin… so very nice to meet you.”
She then mouths ever so obviously, “A neurosurgeon?”
“Yes, Mamá,” I reply with a smile, thinking she’ll now forgive me for skipping church because I bagged someone good.
To my horror, though, she sits on Benjamin’s side of the bed, right near his hip, and pats his leg. “Now, Benjamin… tell me all about yourself. Where are you from? How did you meet my Elena? And wow… a neurosurgeon. That’s just so impressive.”
“Mother,” I practically screech as I sit up straight, holding the sheet to me for dear life. I point to the door. “Now is not the time for conversation. As you can see, we’re um… well, we need… what I mean to say is…”
“Now isn’t the best time,” Benjamin intones, cutting over my prattle. “Maybe we can get dressed, then I can take you ladies out to breakfast or something.”
God love that man, but I really could kiss him right about now as realization sweeps over my mom’s face that she has overstepped her bounds.
She blushes clear up to the roots of her hair, then jumps off the bed as she stammers an apology. “Oh, where in the world are my manners?”
Benjamin chuckles, and I give him an elbow to the ribs.
My mom bobs her head. “You want to spend some time with your new man. I’ll just get out of here and head to church.”
“Okay, Mamá,” I murmur, blowing her a kiss.
She turns sharp eyes to Benjamin. Points at him. “Next time… you come to church with Elena, okay? And after, you come to my house for tamales.”
Benjamin inclines his head and gives her a warm smile, which my mom takes as an acceptance of her invitation. But I know that’s not the case. Benjamin might be up for Mom’s tamales—although it does seem to be a little soon to be introducing him to family—but no way in hell he’d go to church with us.
In fact, I could imagine Benjamin saying something like, “I wouldn’t go see God if he was standing in your front yard.”
That’s all right. It’s enough for me to know God loves him anyway.
If I’m not careful, I might end up feeling the same way.
CHAPTER 25
Benjamin
It’s a perfect Fourth of July, and it’s all because of Elena.
Yes, the sun is shining brightly, though sometimes blotted out by fluffy pristine clouds against a crystal blue sky.
Yes, I’ve found the perfect little cove on Lake Mead to toss anchor where we can take a break from skiing and the other revelers on the lake to have some privacy with each other.
Yes, every day I spend with her, I become more enchanted. I don’t regret my decision to let things progress with her.
And yes… my life seems to be taking an upswing because of this woman.
I try to just enjoy the sun. Let myself get lost in the music. I’ve got my earbuds on, my favorite classic rock playlist blaring, and I’m reclined on one of the padded benches just chilling.
Elena is on the bow of the boat, stretched out on a towel and working on a glorious tan. While the cove we’re in is private enough, it’s not completely secure. Otherwise, I’d encourage her to go full nude. As it is, the little string bikini she’s wearing makes me happy to stare at the absolute perfection of her body while knowing it’s all mine to do with whatever I want, whenever I want.
That’s because Elena likes whatever I do to her, whenever I do it.
The perfect relationship has only been getting better.
I figure if there were ever a time when things could have dampened it was when her mom burst in on us moments after we’d just finished some amazing fucking. My heart was still galloping when Irma Costieri opened that bedroom door, and things could have gone south fast.
Not because of the embarrassingly awkward situation, but mainly because it’s a big to deal to meet the parents of the person you’re dating. It wasn’t something I know Elena had ever even considered doing, and I wasn’t in a place to even think about it with my mom.
Hell, she and I are just now back on good terms. We’re communicating regularly. I’d made the first step and reached out to her like I’d promised myself a week ago.
It was emotional as fuck, and I wasn’t prepared to confront those feelings. I knew I had to apologize for my behavior. That was my big goal, and I pulled it off without a hitch. I thought after that, I could keep the convo light but make it clear I wanted to get back to normal. Instead, I wanted to cry like a damn baby when my mother wouldn’t let me apologize. She wouldn’t give me her forgiveness because she had declared none was needed.
She had merely said, “Benjamin… I love you. You have nothing to be sorry for. You merely survived as best you could. As your mother, I fully support the way in which you had to do it. It was your way, and that’s all that matters to me.”
Fuck, she slayed me. Showed me what being a parent truly means.
Exemplified the theory of unconditional love with just a few words.
Since then, things have been easy. Daily communications, usually via text, but that has more to do with me being so damn busy. One by one, I made other connections. My dad reached out. Then my brother. We’re all back talking again.
It’s breezy conversation as if they know I can’t handle much more than that, but one day—hopefully soon—I’ll have the balls to tell them how sorry I am for shutting them out.
I’ll try to explain why I’d done what I had. Hopefully, they’ll be as understanding as my mother.
Elena shifts, arching her back slightly, which thrusts her breasts up. They’re fantastic, by the way. Truly my favorite part of her body. I could spend hours worshiping them.
When her head swivels, I can tell she’s staring at me through her dark sunglasses. Her lips curve up at the corners, and she asks me something.
I can’t hear her because of the music blaring in my ears so I pull my buds out. She repeats what she just said. “Why are you staring?”
“Because you’re the best thing to look at out here?” I reply truthfully. “By a long shot.”
Elena pushes up to her elbows, scanning the scenery. It really is a beautiful day, and the water has been like glass. I was pleased to find out Elena likes to ski. I used to spend a lot of time on this boat with April, but not so much after we had Cassidy. She was a little too young for water sports, but we would come out on occasion and just tool around a bit.
It feels good to be out again.
Feels good to be experiencing life.
“Why did you go to the Wicked Horse?” I ask, and she raises her eyebrow. “You’ve never told me why. Only you weren’t interested in a relationship.”
I can’t see her eyes behind those sunglasses, but I get the impression she’s blinking in surprise.
Her hesitancy in answering leads me to believe she might have suffered a terrible loss the way I did, and now I regret asking something she might not be ready to talk about.
But Elena merely gives a dismissive
shrug as if it’s not all that interesting of a story. “I had been dating a string of extreme losers.”
Well, that explains exactly nothing. “How so?
“Just got tired of trying to find someone genuine. I used to get taken advantage of quite a bit.”
My protective instincts kick in, and I suppress a growl. I now want the names and addresses of anyone who would dare think they could hurt Elena. She doesn’t notice, though, only leans back on her towel as she continues. “It was always the same. They’d start off cherishing me. Romancing me. Sweeping me off my feet. The next thing I know, I’m doing everything. Caring for them, paying for shit, and being their psychotherapist so they can deal with mommy issues or something.”
“Emotional leeches,” I surmise.
“Pretty much,” she replies softly. “I got tired of needing to always fix them. I had to be responsible for their personal happiness. Which is fine if it’s a two-way street, but it was always all take and no give. Codependency at its finest. It drained the life out of me every time. But to answer your original question, I got tired of feeling like shit about it. Hating them and hating myself for letting it happen. So I heard about The Wicked Horse. As you know, I really like sex. So I thought it would be a suitable alternative to my current life choices.”
“Got it,” I murmur, letting my gaze wander out over the sparkling water.
“I don’t consider you broken, Benjamin,” Elena says, and I snap my head up. She takes her sunglasses off, turning her body to go to one elbow so she can look directly at me. “You’re the least broken person I know.”
“How can you even say that?” I ask, astonished by such a bold proclamation.
“How can I not?” she replies, her brows furrowing in consternation. “You survived a horrible accident. Suffered incredible loss. And yet, you’ve managed to continue giving top-notch medical care in an incredibly specialized field. Sure, you may have been a withdrawn dick to many people over time, but you’ve broken free of that. Taken risks. Given me a chance. Offered me unlimited pleasure. Smiled. Stood up to my Latina mother while naked. Like I said… least broken man I know, Benjamin.”
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