by Lucia Ashta
He moved to my side, and his long tail twitched. “I think you already know what to do.”
“Hunh? No, of course I don’t. Don’t you think I would’ve done it already if I knew what the hell to do?”
“You tell me.” Egan pursed his lips while he studied me with infuriating smugness. I growled, and he smiled. “See, I was right,” he said. “You do know what to do. So what’s keeping you from doing it?”
“Oh, I don’t know!” I flung my hands in the air. “How about the fact that I could kill Quinn if I try? Or that I could send us off to some plane that isn’t even on this planet? Or that I could vaporize us into nothing but ash? Shall I continue?”
“Only if you want to.”
Pouting, I kicked at the ground beneath me angrily, then dug my bare toe into the earth. “What if I mess up?”
“And what if you don’t?”
I scowled. “If I mess up, it could be really, really bad.”
“And if you don’t try, that sea witch is going to kill you. I’m surprised she hasn’t already, actually, with the way she talks and handles herself. She’s anxious to get out of here, and she doesn’t think she can leave before the problem is resolved. Which means that the sooner she resolves it, the better for her.”
I nodded distractedly. He was right. “I think she really means it when she says she doesn’t want to kill Quinn and me. She’s giving us a chance.”
He arched his brow and pawed at the ground. I couldn’t tell what that meant.
“These wizards will figure it out,” I finally said, trying to believe it myself.
“If you want to put your fate and that of the man you love in their hands…”
Eyes wide, I took a step toward him. “Should I not trust them?”
“That’s not what I said. I merely suggested that perhaps you should trust yourself.”
“Use my angel magic and risk Quinn? Risk everything?”
“Aren’t you already risking everything with your delay? I don’t sense magic the way Mulunu apparently does, or as Mordecai and Albacus do, but they’ve all been extremely nervous at having the two of you on the grounds like this. I don’t think they’re exaggerating when they say you could blow everyone up.”
“Why don’t you look more worried about that?” I asked, finding his almost jovial manner suspicious, especially given that this was Egan, and I was pretty sure the pegataur enjoyed antagonizing me.
“Because, Selene, I know you.”
I stared at him until I was certain that was all he was going to say. “Uh-huh ... and, what does that mean?”
“You know what I mean.”
“No, I really don’t.” But yeah, I really did. I was just making excuses. Fear had a hold on me, and its grip was tight. Never before had I had so much to lose.
Egan smiled broadly as if he were inside my mind. “No time like the present. You just might want to move away from the healing room a bit.”
“I thought you trusted in me.”
“I do, but I also trust in caution. It’s kept me alive more than once.” With a sharp nod, he started backing up, his hooves thudding softly on the forest ground. “Don’t delay, Selene. I can’t shake the feeling that you’re running out of time to take your chance.”
“Where are you going?” I asked, wincing at the panic I heard in my question.
“I told you, a bit farther away. You don’t need me. You’ve known what to do from the start, you’re only just admitting it to yourself. Just like when the werewolves charged you and you flew upward and forced them to shift back to their human forms. You didn’t think, you acted by instinct. You sought to protect yourself. Now protect yourself again, and protect the man you love. Trust me when I say that love is always worth it.”
Wondering if Egan had loved someone, I watched him retreat until he pointed at me and flicked his head at me. His message was clear: it was now or never. And never wasn’t an option I could live with.
Nodding repeatedly to encourage myself, I dismissed the idea of saying my goodbyes—just in case—and closed my eyes. I didn’t want to worry any of my friends, and I especially didn’t want to alert Mulunu to what I was about to do. She’d probably interfere, claiming my magic too unstable.
Breathing deeply, I set about deciding what the reality I wanted to create looked like, when rustling had me snapping my eyes open.
Mordecai and Albacus were half running, half floating toward me, skimming the ground. Sir Lancelot flew above them. Urgency battled with enthusiasm across their faces, and my heart rate accelerated while I waited, wondering if waiting was a mistake that would seal our fate.
20
When Mordecai and Albacus drew to a stop in front of me, they were short of breath. Sir Lancelot gave one final sweep of the clearing before landing on the ground in front of them. The moment he did, I asked them all the big question.
“So? Did you figure out how to save Quinn and me?”
Looking at the wizards, I knew their answer before they spoke. An odd numbness settled into the pit of my stomach. I wondered if I’d already panicked too much and there was no more room left for emotion.
“We’re sorry, child,” Albacus said, “but we didn’t find anything in any book or any spell that considers the oddity that you and Quinn are.” He said “oddity” like it was a good thing, and I realized that the wizards actually looked … excited.
Mordecai was nodding his head to the soft chime of beads. “We even consulted the writings of one of our former students. Clara was the only one to sense the five-petal knot.”
When I quirked my brows in question at them, Albacus added, “The secret fifth element that bonds all the other elements together.”
“Fire, air, earth, and water,” Mordecai clarified.
“Can this five-petal knot help us, then?” I asked, trying to latch on to any good news.
“We’d hoped so, child,” Albacus said. “But we didn’t find anything that suggested how. Clara used her magic in a way that reminded us of your angel magic, though it isn’t the same. Clara just managed to … shape the elements to create the result she wanted.”
My eyes widened. “So where is this Clara? Let’s ask her. Maybe she can help us.”
“Clara died decades ago,” Albacus said. “It might be possible to ask her spirit—”
“May be,” Mordecai cautioned.
“May be,” Albacus repeated. “But either way, we don’t have time for any of that. Now that I’m half living again, I can’t interact with the spirit world as I had when I was fully dead.”
Oh-kay.
“The point is that,” Mordecai took over, “my brother and I have been sensing that your powers and Quinn’s are clashing with each other. They’re fighting to be released.”
Albacus nodded grimly. “And we can’t let that happen.”
“Indeed we can’t, or the results could be catastrophic.”
“Totally catastrophic.”
Ahem. Sir Lancelot cleared his throat. “What Lords Albacus and Mordecai are getting at is that Mordecai’s runes suggest that you are the answer to your problems.”
“That’s right,” Mordecai said, shaking his pocket, its contents jingling softly. “My runes say that it’s urgent too. You need to fix this, and you need to do it now.”
“That’s why we ran all the way back over here,” Albacus commented.
“To tell me that I have to fix my problem?” I asked, debating whether I was more skeptical or more disappointed. I didn’t need someone else telling me the weight of Quinn’s life was directly on my shoulders.
But Sir Lancelot, Mordecai, and Albacus nodded.
“That’s it? That’s really all you’ve got for me?” I tried not to be pissy, but really, could life get any more unreasonable?
“Well, one more thing,” Albacus said. “My brother and I can perform a spell that will contain whatever your magic throws off.”
“It will protect everyone around you,” Mordecai added, “Just not you�
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“That’s the idea, at least. We’ve never had the pleasure of casting this particular spell before.” Albacus turned to look at his brother, their old faces in identical expressions of excitement.
“Great,” I murmured under my breath. “So it’s all on me, you’re not sure if your protection will actually work, and I’d better get to it already? Is that about right?”
“Yes,” both brothers answered at once, grinning.
“Don’t worry, Lady Selene,” Sir Lancelot said, and I had to look down at the little owl who was barely taller than my hand. “Their childlike enthusiasm is part of the reason they are such gifted magicians. But they know what they’re doing. Their spell will work, and if it doesn’t, it wouldn’t have worked for anyone else alive anyway. You have my permission to begin.”
“Right now?” I squeaked.
“This very second.”
“That’s right,” Mordecai added, his eyes suddenly somber. “There isn’t a moment to waste, young lady. My runes were most clear. You either fix things with your magic now, or you won’t have the chance.”
“What does that mean exactly?” I asked.
“With the runes it’s never much clearer than that, but they’re also never wrong.”
“Never,” Albacus added gravely.
And before I could protest any further, the wizards walked to opposite sides of me, extending their hands in front of them, and began chanting so softly that there was no chance of following their spell. Regardless, I could tell it was already working.
A whistling breeze whipped through the clearing, setting the leaves on the surrounding plants rustling. My instincts told me this was no ordinary wind. It was magic, and time was wasting.
After a final glance at Sir Lancelot, I couldn’t stall any longer. The owl’s wide, serious eyes were pinned on me. “Now, Selene. Remember, believe in yourself.”
And as the brothers’ magic built in strength through the clearing, I had no choice. Either Quinn and I would survive or we wouldn’t, but either way it was all on me.
With a sharp nod to myself, I closed my eyes, blocking out my surroundings as best I could. The answer wasn’t outside of me. From the very beginning, it had been within me.
I called on my magic…
Time distorted until I had no idea how much of it had passed. I imagined Quinn and me, content and safe sharing a life together, until there was nothing more I could picture, no more ways in which I could delay the inevitable. It distilled into something quite simple: Quinn and I alive and together.
When I sensed odd warmth around my body, I allowed my eyes to open, but I remained in a daze, removed from the here and now even as my body experienced so many new sensations. Hazily, I registered that I now stood in the center of a brilliant bubble of soft yellow light. It had substance, as if it were made of water, though I understood this couldn’t be the case. Mordecai and Albacus continued to stand with their arms outstretched, streams of light pouring from their open palms. Their gazes were focused, intent, and they didn’t appear to register the fact that I’d opened my eyes.
Sluggishly, I realized that their protection not only kept those on the outside from being affected by what I was doing, but it also shielded me from their actions. As if I were merely a disinterested observer, I registered that Egan and Irving were fighting to restrain Mulunu while Brogan and Liana watched from the sidelines, ready to intervene if necessary. Fianna, Nessa, and Melinda hovered around Quinn, apparently trying to convince him not to attempt to enter the bubble surrounding me. Scales crept across the bare flesh of his forearms beneath his t-shirt, before retreating rapidly again. His eyes were alight with a feverish desperation, and I distantly noticed how hard he was fighting to join me. Sir Lancelot and Nancy observed the scene with astute, watchful gazes. White sparks flew occasionally from Nancy’s palms, as if she were maintaining her magic at the ready in case she needed to intervene.
Mulunu was in the process of raising her staff above her head, its crystal glowing as brightly as the circle of protection the brothers kept in place around me.
“No,” I whispered to myself, and I outstretched my hand in her direction, picturing her unable to cause me harm.
It was a simple thought: I am safe.
Mulunu’s forehead scrunched in concentration and her biceps strained with her efforts as she attempted to direct her magic at me … but her staff resisted her.
I felt the air magic and water magic mixing within me, churning like I contained a raging storm. The only way to overcome their incompatibility was through calm, as that was also the only way I could access the creation magic of the angels.
Someone screamed. Mulunu, or maybe Quinn, or maybe both of them. I registered the cry like something distant, unable to affect me.
Lackadaisically, I trailed my gaze across the wizard brothers. Their arms were shaking from their efforts. And the storm inside me raged stronger.
Mordecai opened his mouth and cried out instructions to me, but I failed to process them. Next, Albacus shouted something at me. I perceived his cries as little more than a rumble, a mere disturbance of energy.
The energy that I now controlled.
Unwilling to resist the lure to Quinn, I faced him. His eyes widened for a moment, before he too started yelling something at me. But words weren’t important here, in the place where I was. All I needed to know I could sense already: his desperation, his concern for me, his love, and his hope that we’d find a way through this.
It was all the same that I’d felt … before. Now I barely felt anything. The world, even my place within it, was remote, apart from me. And I could shape the reality to my abstract liking.
Peace, joy, love, celebration. I remembered these were the things I wanted. Safety. Magic.
And so I would have them.
The elements within me, and the earth from below, slammed into each other, over and again, like waves crashing against a break. They’d destroy me given enough time. That much power couldn’t be contained for long. Eventually one would overpower the others and spill outward, probably destroying me as it rushed out into the world to join more of itself. For the elements were all around us, in every aspect of life. It was only that my body encapsulated so much of them. So concentrated, they fought for release.
I’d give it to them.
However the details looked, I didn’t bother with them. I focused on the feelings. Quinn and I needed to be free of the concentration of the elements that warred within us. Our magic had to be at peace with itself; it couldn’t strike out without our control. It had to obey our direction.
I closed my eyes once more, blocking out all signs of Mulunu’s struggle, of the wizards’ magic, and of Quinn’s desperation to reach me. Soon, Q, soon…
Just as I’d pictured Naomi, Petunia, and Dimorelli dead, I pictured Quinn and I so incredibly alive, enjoying everything life offered. I felt our insides, pushing beyond the torrential seas of the elements within us, the essence of our parents.
We were no longer half this and half that—we were whole, completely and entirely whole.
We were in love. We were love. We were the purest and most powerful of magic.
As if simply blowing a wish upon an ocean breeze, I released my vision to the universe. Bizarrely unattached to the results of my actions, I smiled, and I felt my father’s presence for the very first time in my life.
An overwhelming sense of peace slammed into me with all the force of a tsunami. I didn’t manage to open my eyes before I sank to the ground. I landed gently, peacefully, as if my father were lowering me to the ground.
And as I allowed my consciousness to drift wherever it wanted to go, Quinn’s calls pierced the odd blanket of muffled silence that had surrounded me.
“Selene!” he cried, and I drifted gently to sleep.
21
I woke not long after, drawn back to consciousness by Quinn’s strong arms squeezing me into his chest as he struggled to draw a full breath. His b
ody shook against mine while chaos reigned behind us.
Mulunu was shouting with the might of thunder, while Albacus and Mordecai were surprisingly able to hold their own against her. Despite their apparent half-alive status, they were seemingly no less powerful for it. The two brothers were right up in her space, and when she flung her staff forward as if to use her magic against them, Albacus and Mordecai each snapped a hand at her and she went flying backwards, her long hair jutting out around her like live eels.
She landed like a crab, in a low crouch, and shot up with the speed of someone a fraction her age. When her staff whipped out to the side to point at the wizard brothers, Brogan lunged forward and stomped on it, cracking it in half with a sickening snap.
Mulunu screamed as if Brogan had broken her bones instead of her staff. When she turned her fury on him, those standing ran toward her to intervene. Fianna and Nessa, who’d apparently joined the fray at some point, zoomed toward the sea witch as fast as hummingbirds.
Egan shouted in a deep, horse-like voice, and Sir Lancelot cried above the din, but no one made out a word of his orders to stop. When Liana ran to stand in front of Brogan, directly in the line of Mulunu’s wrath, and Irving also moved between the sea witch and the polar bear shifter who’d helped us, I called out.
My voice was soft, like a whisper, as if I hadn’t used it in years.
Even so, Quinn stilled completely. His incessant trembling ceased as he whipped his head around from where he’d been watching the others stare at me.
“Selene?” he croaked, and I smiled broadly. “Selene!” He yelled this time, as if he couldn’t believe that I was alive and in his arms.
The chaos around us stilled to a dead stop.
