Too bad that man wasn’t him. She was organized, goal-oriented and devoted to her faith and family. He was impulsive and guilt-ridden, and having started running from his mistakes, had no idea how to stop now. Even today’s visit to Kansas City was, in a way, an excuse to leave town and let Laramie take care of his children. She’d already refused to be the twins’ permanent caregiver. And honestly, he couldn’t blame her. Laramie was right. She shouldn’t rearrange her whole life because he was having a crisis. He’d take this quick trip for work and then he’d come home and find a way to solve his own problems for once.
Chapter Three
Why had she let Jack talk her into this?
The clock on the oven in Jack’s kitchen read 3:52 a.m. as Laramie slowly walked another lap around the island, then through the living room past Jack’s sofa. Even Trixie was snoring on her bed in the living room, with both her puppies snuggled against her tummy. Laramie was beyond exhausted, and her arms and shoulders ached from holding Charlotte, but she woke up every time Laramie tried to put her in the portable crib beside Macey. Walking and humming softly seemed to be the secret to Charlotte’s happiness, but Laramie wasn’t sure how much longer she could keep this up. Especially since Macey would probably be awake soon, too.
All her confidence from the night before had vanished, and now she was counting the minutes until Jack got home. Maybe it was time to call for reinforcements as soon as the sun came up. Skye or Mrs. Tomlinson or even her own mother would all come to her rescue. That was one of the reasons she loved living in Merritt’s Crossing. People genuinely cared for one another. Except lately she’d been so focused on what everybody else needed that she’d pushed her own dreams and plans aside. Again. Story of her life. Anyway, no matter how aggravated she was with Jack for getting himself into this mess, she’d promised she’d keep his secret until he got back from Kansas City later today. Caring for the babies by herself was a lot of work, but it wasn’t her place to tell Jack’s family about the twins, so she’d have to find a way to make it through the next several hours alone.
As she walked into the kitchen and rounded the island again, she glanced down at Charlotte asleep in her arms and admired the baby’s long eyelashes, flawless skin and perfect cherubic mouth.
This is everything you’ve ever wanted.
The realization flitted through her mind and she tried quickly to dismiss it. Probably her lack of sleep making her think such irrational thoughts. Laramie carefully tucked Charlotte into the crook of her opposite arm and kept moving. She did want a husband, a house with a big yard and children of her own. And every minute she spent in Jack’s house only made her more aware of everything she’d always liked about his place. From the leather furniture and hardwood floors to the impressive river-rock fireplace in the living room, it was way too easy to envision a future here with the babies. And Jack.
Except Jack had only called her because he needed reliable childcare. Worse, he was a master at dodging complicated situations. The twins were a perfect example of his inability to commit to anything other than his career and making sure life was one big continuous party. He’d conceived children after a one-night stand, and she couldn’t remember the last time she’d seen him in church. This was not the kind of guy she wanted to trust with her heart. Her chest ached at the painful reminders of why Jack was so wrong for her.
She caught a glimpse of the framed photos on his bookshelf in the living room and stopped to study each one again. A picture of Jack hiking in Yosemite National Park, another with his college buddies at a professional baseball game and a third commemorating his whitewater rafting trip down the Colorado River all highlighted his independence and the many ways he’d tried to cope with the loss of his father and uncle.
Laramie shifted her gaze to the beautiful baby in her arms. Jack wasn’t ready to be a father. No matter how precious the girls were, she refused to be the long-term solution to his latest crisis. Even her generosity had its limitations. Jack wasn’t interested in a relationship with her. They’d known each other their whole lives. If he wanted to be more than friends, he would’ve asked by now.
Although it hurt to acknowledge the truth, she knew he’d only called her because she’d worked as a nanny before. Jack was just desperate. She should’ve told him no. Let him clean up his own mess. Why did she always say yes when someone needed her help? Regret and irritation mingled with fatigue and she stared longingly at the recliner nearby. If the babies were both asleep, maybe she could sneak in a quick nap, too.
Laramie eased into the leather chair, holding her breath as she slowly leaned back and willed Charlotte not to wake up. As soon as Jack came home, she’d hand off the babies, then spend the rest of the day baking pies and cookies for the Memorial Day celebration with her family. She’d make chocolate chip cookies. Her grandfather’s favorite. Since she wasn’t sure how many more family picnics she’d be able to celebrate with him, she wanted to bake something he really loved.
Her eyelids grew heavy and she finally relaxed, succumbing to the comfort of the chair and the warmth of Charlotte snuggled against her chest. If only she could get a little bit of rest, she’d have the energy to get through the morning until Jack came home.
She’d only been asleep a few minutes when Macey’s cry filtered through the baby monitor.
Oh no.
“Please, not yet,” she whispered into the darkness. She wasn’t used to taking care of twins, especially when she hadn’t had more than two hours of sleep. Macey kept crying, so Laramie forced herself to stand, hoping Charlotte wouldn’t wake up, too. As she walked past the kitchen counter on her way to the babies’ room, her phone lit up with an incoming text message.
She hesitated. Read the message or get to Macey right away? A predawn text message was probably important. She leaned closer. And it was from Jack. Hopefully he was letting her know he was taking an earlier flight.
Good morning. My flight was canceled due to bad weather. I’m trying to get on the next flight at three this afternoon. I’m so sorry. I’ve already called my brother and woke him up. He’ll come by in a few hours with groceries and he can stay with the girls until I get home. Please text me when you wake up so I know you got this message.
Laramie wanted to scream. Of course Jack’s flight was canceled. She should’ve known he wouldn’t come home when he’d planned. While sending Drew over with diapers and formula was a good idea, she wasn’t convinced he could handle taking care of the girls by himself. He was a great guy and all, but he didn’t have kids. She’d only known him to babysit his nephew, Connor, a handful of times. Could she leave him alone for several hours with twin babies? And how would Charlotte and Macey react to yet another stranger?
As she padded into the babies’ room, Charlotte’s face crumpled with distress and she started to fuss. Macey’s cries echoed louder, and Laramie blew out a long breath.
“Jack Tomlinson, you are in so much trouble.”
When he finally did come home, Laramie was going to give him a piece of her mind. He should’ve canceled his trip to Kansas City and let someone else handle the data breach. There were other cybersecurity analysts available. As usual, when a crisis impacted his family, Jack had conveniently left town. Fatherhood was going to be a rude awakening for a guy who was accustomed to shirking his responsibilities. And she wasn’t going to let him leave his daughters like this again.
* * *
On Sunday afternoon, Jack eased his truck into his driveway and turned off the ignition. He’d hoped to see Drew’s truck parked by the garage, but Laramie’s sedan was there instead. Drew had texted that he’d brought diapers and formula but hadn’t stayed with the twins, like they’d discussed. Jack’s scalp prickled. She was going to be so aggravated with him for coming home a day late. Just like everyone else in his life. He was used to disappointing people, but he hated disappointing Laramie. Getting stranded in Kansas City was a disaster, especially s
ince she’d asked him not to go and he’d ignored her request.
Shouldering his backpack, he grabbed the two bags of groceries he’d picked up on the way home and exited the truck. His steps quickened at the thought of seeing Macey and Charlotte. Although he was still in shock that he was a father, he was pleasantly surprised how often he’d thought about the girls over the weekend.
Bracing for the anger and frustration he expected to see in Laramie’s eyes, he quietly eased the door open. Silence greeted him. The comforting aroma of clean laundry and a hint of something delicious cooking in the kitchen enveloped Jack as he stepped inside. He set the groceries and his backpack down, then listened for the sound of babies crying or Laramie’s voice. Trixie stood and trotted toward him, both her puppies scampering behind her.
“Hey, girl.” Jack scratched her behind the ears. Tail wagging, Trixie leaned against his legs. At least she was happy to see him. “Where is everybody?”
He glanced toward the sofa in the living room and his breath caught at the sight of Laramie asleep in his recliner with one of the babies snuggled in her arms. The baby—he was pretty sure it was Charlotte—had her cheek pressed against Laramie’s shoulder and her mouth was hanging open. Laramie’s beautiful long blond hair spilled around her like a platinum pool and her manicured fingertips were braced protectively around Charlotte’s backside. Her eyes were closed, allowing him to admire her peaceful expression. This whole scenario did a number on his heart, though. Seeing her asleep in his favorite chair and holding one of his daughters nearly took him to his knees.
He didn’t deserve a friend like Laramie. His life was a mess, as usual, and she’d graciously stepped in and rescued him, like she often did when she realized her friends and family were struggling. And these precious girls needed two parents—not a mixed-up guy who only knew how to run from his problems. He’d heard what the social worker said about attachment and bonding and the twins needing their father, but he still had his doubts that he was the right person to have permanent custody.
Jack patted Trixie on the head, then tiptoed through the house and down the hall to the babies’ room. Gently nudging the door open, he peeked inside. Macey was lying on her back in the portable crib, babbling quietly. She turned her head and met his gaze, then offered him a toothless grin through the mesh wall.
Jack’s insides melted. “Hey, Macey.”
She babbled louder and he crossed the room and scooped her up. “How’s it going?”
Macey shoved her fist in her mouth, then squirmed in his arms. Was she hungry? Or was she hoping to see a familiar face? At least she wasn’t screaming. Yet.
“Are you looking for your sister?” Jack clumsily sank to the floor where Laramie had arranged another package of diapers and a container of wipes. He was still lousy at changing diapers, but he figured it out. Thankfully, Macey’s green-and-white-striped outfit had a zipper this time.
Lifting Macey into his arms, he carefully tossed the diaper into the trash, still feeling a little awkward carrying a baby. As soon as he walked down the hallway and into the living room, she saw Laramie and Charlotte asleep in the recliner and squealed with excitement.
“Shhh,” he said, chuckling softly at her reaction.
Laramie’s eyes fluttered open, then widened as she recognized Jack. “You’re home.”
“Hey.”
“What time is it?” She glanced down at Charlotte asleep in her arms.
“Almost four.” He winced. “I’m sorry.”
She met his gaze again, her green eyes narrowed. “For what?”
“For being late, making you stay with the girls, Drew leaving.” He shifted from one foot to the other, trying to appease Macey as she squirmed and fussed.
“You’re here now. That’s what matters.” Laramie pushed to her feet, then tucked Charlotte into the crook of her arm. Macey kicked her leg against Jack’s hip as Laramie moved closer.
Laramie’s brow furrowed. “What’s wrong, pumpkin?”
Macey leaned away from Jack with both of her arms outstretched.
“She wants you,” he said.
“Can you hold Charlotte?” Laramie passed him the sleeping baby without waiting for his response. “We can trade.”
“Right.” Their fingers brushed as he scooped Charlotte into his arms and tried to focus on keeping her asleep so he wasn’t distracted by the warmth of Laramie’s touch or her ability to soothe Macey’s crying instantly. His daughters needed Laramie. He needed Laramie. So how could he convince her to stay?
Laramie turned away and moved toward the oven, singing softly to Macey. The baby’s chubby hand grasped a fistful of Laramie’s yellow T-shirt. Jack stole a quick glance at Laramie’s white shorts and tan legs. Even though she’d spent the weekend caring for two babies, and probably hadn’t had more than a few minutes to herself, she was as beautiful as ever.
“Where’s Drew?”
She lifted the lid on the saucepan and peeked inside. “I sent him home.”
“Why?”
Laramie shot him a pointed look over her shoulder. “Your brother’s a great guy, but he cannot handle twins by himself.”
Jack scrubbed his palm over his face. “He didn’t help you at all?”
“He stayed for a few hours, then I sent him home.” Laramie stirred whatever was simmering in the pan and put the lid back. “He had to work today anyway.”
Jack glanced from Macey wedged on Laramie’s hip to Charlotte cradled against his chest. His stomach coiled in a knot. He couldn’t handle twins, either. He had to ask Laramie to keep helping him. What was he going to do if she said no?
“What did your mom say when you told her about the twins?”
Jack hesitated. “I didn’t tell her yet.”
“Jack.” She glared at him. “We had a deal.”
“I know.” He looked away, heat flooding his cheeks. He felt about ten years old, getting a lecture for yet another one of his lousy decisions.
She studied him. “What are you going to do about childcare?”
“That’s what I need to talk to you about.”
“I knew this was going to happen.” Her mouth flattened. “The answer’s no.”
“Please, Laramie. You’re so good for the girls and they’re happy with you.”
She started emptying the dishwasher with one hand and refused to look at him.
“Say something.”
“You can’t possibly know if the babies are happy, because you’ve barely spent any time with them.”
Her voice carried an edge he hadn’t heard very often. Almost like she was judging him. Not that he blamed her. He’d messed up big time. Didn’t he get any credit for trying to do what was best for Macey and Charlotte, though? Laramie was exactly what they needed.
“Just until you start volleyball season in August.”
“That’s two months.” Her expression was a mixture of worry and confusion. “I’m taking my volleyball team to camp in Fort Collins in July, and my family needs me, too.”
“I’ll figure out a way for you to help your family and watch the babies.”
“Wow, thank you so much. Because taking care of people was exactly how I wanted to spend my entire summer break.”
He winced. “I’m sorry. That didn’t come out right. What I meant was I’ll find someone to help part-time so you’re not giving up your whole summer for us. And it might not even be until August. I’m applying for a job in Utah, so if that works out, then I’ll only need your help until I move.”
Laramie stilled, a dish halfway to the stack inside the cabinet. She turned slowly to face him, something unreadable flickering in her eyes.
He hadn’t planned on telling her about the job in Utah until he had an interview lined up. Except he was tired of keeping secrets. Why was she staring at him like that? Shouldn’t she be happy that he might not need
her help for the whole summer?
“You’re going to move out of state with two babies and a puppy?”
“It’s a government job with great benefits and more stability.”
“But you won’t know anyone. The babies will have yet another new babysitter, plus a whole new house to get used to. If you have trouble, who will you call? You need your family now more than ever.”
That was the problem. He didn’t want to be near his family anymore. Charlotte’s eyes opened and she started to cry, keeping him from blurting the words on the tip of his tongue. Jack appreciated her concern, but the twins were only six months old. If they were with him, what difference did it make if they lived here or in Utah? Besides, he couldn’t stay in Merritt’s Crossing any longer. The family’s scandal surrounding Dad and Uncle Kenny’s longstanding feud still haunted him. He knew his mom and his siblings wished he hadn’t fought with his dad the day that he died. The blame weighed heavy. If he’d been more involved, maybe they’d both still be alive.
“I need a fresh start,” he said. “Small towns have long memories and I’m tired of bumping into all the reminders of my failures.”
She stared at him, her jaw tight. Then she extracted some of her hair from Macey’s grasp. “I’ll take care of the girls until July 15. Or until you move, but you have to tell your family about the babies by tomorrow.”
“Thank you.” Jack smiled and breathed a sigh, but he couldn’t ignore the tension blanketing the space between them. The job in Utah might be a wonderful opportunity and a fresh start, but it meant saying goodbye to Laramie. He wasn’t sure his heart could handle that, but it was best for everyone.
Chapter Four
Jack wanted to move to Utah.
His news had rolled into Laramie’s world like a storm blowing across the Front Range. She’d spent the rest of the holiday weekend running his crazy plan through her head and she still couldn’t believe he was serious.
She squeezed the life out of her car’s steering wheel as she followed Jack’s pickup truck into the modest subdivision in Merritt’s Crossing where his mother lived.
An Unexpected Arrangement Page 4
