Tristan’s thoughts were interrupted when Nyle’s phone rang. Nyle glanced down at his phone and his eyes brightened with an emotion Tristan knew all too well. He instinctively knew who it was before Nyle even answered. He held his breath and closed his eyes.
“Hello? Hi baby.”
Nyle looked over at Tristan, his blue eyes full of dark mischief. Tristan haltingly opened his eyes and looked at him. The hate in his eyes did nothing to dim the love in Nyle’s as he spoke.
“I’m good; just missing you,” Nyle said in a seductive whisper. “Yes, I’m still at the studio… I’ll be home soon…Want me to bring you anything back? “
Tristan strained his ears, struggling to hear his love’s sweet voice but got nothing. He missed the sound of her girlish, sensuous voice so much.
“What are you cooking tonight? I can’t wait… I’ll see you soon. I’ve been thinking about you all day. I can’t wait to make love to you tonight… I love you too baby. Bye.”
Nile ended the call and evilly smiled at Tristan. Tristan averted his eyes away from him. “Well, husbandly duties call man. I gotta go. It’s been real. Take care of yourself.”
Tristan fixed him with a hard, sinister snarl.
The look Nyle returned to him was just as deadly. And just as dangerous. “And leave my wife alone,” he quietly warned. “Leave us alone. We’re happy. Do yourself a favor and move on. Or I can promise you, it won’t be pretty. I have a gun too. And unlike you, I’m not afraid to use it.”
Nyle stood to his feet and zipped up his jacket, his eyes locked and loaded on Tristan. He put his hand on the table and peered into Tristan’s eyes as he leaned close to him. “By the way, she’s never going to get your letters. I tossed them.”
With that, he slapped Tristan hard on the shoulder, turned his back, and promptly left the restaurant, not stopping to give the autograph he had promised.
Tristan viciously stared after him, his pulse racing, his eyes red and filled with rage; his fists clenched hard on the table. He wished he had killed him when he’d had the chance.
Tristan took out his phone, scrolled through his contacts, found what he was looking for, and quickly hit the number. This shit wasn’t over. It was far from over.
Six months later….
SERENITY
I am so happy. I am beyond happy. I am the happiest I’ve ever been in my life. Nyle makes me happy. I love Nyle and he loves me. He’s the best thing that ever happened to me. Marrying him is the best decision I ever made in my life. I look forward to spending the rest of my life with him. I am beyond blessed. I love him and him only.
Another rehearsed, practiced monologue Serenity had repeated to herself over and over in her mind every day for the past nine months. Most days it worked. Lately, it was becoming harder to say it with conviction and believe it. Whoever said time heals all wounds was clearly a fool and didn’t know what the hell they were talking about.
Serenity stood in the kitchen of the Mediterranean style home she shared with Nyle, staring vacantly into space as she made lunch for him to take to the studio. He was working on a new album with Ricky, Dennis, and Maxim and they had been spending most of their days and nights there trying to perfect the lyrics and get the sound just right. She hardly saw her husband anymore. Most of the time when he was coming in, she was going out; when he was asleep, she was awake and vice versa. It would’ve made the average newlywed crazy, but they had been managing everything pretty good so far. They had been married almost a year and had fallen into a normal routine that worked quite well for them.
Opening a cabinet above the stove, Serenity pulled down a sectional Tupperware container and stocked it with the baked chicken, rice, and veggies she had just made for her husband. She made breakfast and lunch for him every day and she did it gladly. He normally was at the studio during dinner hours, so he ordered something in while he was there or skipped dinner altogether. Serenity would usually have a cup of homemade soup or a simple sandwich for dinner. Cooking was very therapeutic for her. Especially lately.
“Nyle, your lunch is ready babe!” she called up the stairs to him.
“Be down in a minute gorgeous!” he called back.
Serenity continued to stand at the stove, staring blankly as images of seven years before flashed around in her mind, taunting and teasing her. Tangled limbs. Heavy moans. Cries of pleasure. Bodies glistening with sweat. Love songs playing incessantly on repeat. The feel of her former lover’s dick thrusting hard in and out of her. Orgasms that felt so good they were painful.
“Stop it,” she harshly whispered to herself. “Stop it.”
It was nothing doing. She couldn’t stop the images. She was starting to think love was a curse created by the gods to drive women mad.
Serenity pushed away from the stove and slowly paced back and forth in their large, open kitchen. Sex wasn’t the only thing clawing at her mind. She remembered the good days. The early days. The night they’d met. The way he’d looked at her. How his hand felt in hers. How safe she felt with his arms around her. Even in the midst of all the madness their love affair had brought, it still felt right 90% of the time. She always felt one day it would work out. What the fuck had happened? What had changed his mind?
Closure was what the fuck she needed. She never had closure. Seven years ago, he had casually and selfishly walked away from their relationship, her love, and her without a backwards glance, regret, hesitation, or an explanation. Nyle had told her what Tristan had said. Nyle had intimated the sorry ass excuse and reasoning behind his departure. But none of it had made any sense, especially since he never came back or made an effort to contact her and explain or redeem himself. In seven years, he never tried to contact her. Not once. Then nine months ago he wanted to come back? For what? To reclaim his undying love? To shoot and kill Nyle? Why, when he was the one who had caused all this unnecessary heartache and confusion in the first place?
Serenity slapped the breakfast table with her hand and viciously cursed under her breath. This was all his fuckin’ fault. She had been just fine nine months ago; then he had to show up at the church and fuck everything up. Twist her heart in knots again. Place himself in her presence. Look at her with that look of love she had convinced herself was so real years ago. Why had he come back? Was he still here? Had he left?
She had asked both Katherine and Ricky and they weren’t talking. Both would quickly change the subject or feign ignorance. She knew better. She knew they were hiding something. If they were protecting her or Tristan was the question.
Serenity walked back to the stove, grabbed another Tupperware container and commenced to packing up the leftover food. Her fingers were itching with the temptation to call Katherine or Ricky and demand they tell her the truth, but she fought against it.
Something told her Katherine hadn’t been upfront about why Tristan had decided to come back home suddenly. The fact that he would show up at his mom’s house unexpected, 48 hours before Serenity was due to get married based on how “uneasy” his mother had sounded reeked of BS. Katherine had been missing her son for seven years and if seven years’ worth of calls hadn’t made him come back, one troubled phone call wasn’t going to do it. Serenity respected Katherine too much to call her a liar but she sincerely felt his mother had something to do with him coming back home the day before she and Nyle’s wedding. She just had to get up the nerve and confront her about it.
Nyle soon came downstairs, dressed casually in a button-down shirt, jeans, and name-brand sneakers. He crept up behind his wife and grabbed her from the back, kissing her on the neck. “Thank you beautiful,” he cooed.
Serenity turned into his arms and grinned widely. She threw her arms around him and kissed him on the nose. “You’re welcome handsome.”
Nyle tipped his head down to hers and she opened her mouth, kissing him passionately. She could feel his erection pressing against her thigh and pulled away from him with a teasing smile.
“You better stop playing and g
et out of here before you’re late again.”
Nyle pressed her against the stove and hungrily looked at her. “It’ll be so worth it if I am. They can wait. Fuck ‘em.”
“No, you want to fuck me.”
He gave her a wolfish grin. “That I do.”
Serenity traced circles on his broad chest with her finger. “The boys will be pissed if you screw this up. The record company is on you guys hard to get this album done. You can’t afford to be their enemy right now.”
Nyle sighed heavily and reluctantly pulled away from her. “Yes, yes, yes, I know. You’re right. I’ll just be glad when we finish this album. It’s taking up all my damn time.”
“Well, you want it to be perfect, don’t you?”
“Yes. I just hate it’s keeping me away from you.” Nyle snuggled his nose against hers and gave her a light peck. “Thank you so much for being so patient through all this baby.”
She didn’t want to remind him she’d been through it several times before already, including when Tristan was at the forefront of the group. “I know it’ll all pay off and I know it’s for a higher purpose. I know how much music and this band means to you. Besides, I’m not going anywhere. I’ll be here. Always.”
Nyle’s eyes narrowed with desire and he leaned into her again, kissing her long and hard. “I’ll be back as soon as I can.”
“I’ll be here.”
“I love you Mrs. Wentworth.”
“I love you Husband.”
He smacked her on the behind and winked at her. He grabbed his jacket off the back of one of the chairs in the breakfast nook and headed out through the garage door. Serenity stood still in the middle of the kitchen floor, vacantly staring into space again. She listened as the car door slammed; then listened as the car started, the garage door lifted and closed, and as his car drove away. She went to the breakfast table, plopped down hard in a chair and put her head in her hands, sighing with relief. It was getting harder and harder to pretend to feel something she hadn’t felt in a while. If she was being honest, she hadn’t felt it in the first place.
She couldn’t figure out what the hell was wrong with her. What person with common sense still loved and couldn’t get over someone who had irreparably broken their heart? What dumbass could have a beautiful, passionate, loyal, and most important, faithful man in their possession and still yearn for someone who couldn’t commit, couldn’t be faithful, and couldn’t even say I love you for a whole year? Nyle had told her he loved her the same night he’d first kissed her; before they were even official yet.
She felt horrible for the way she felt but at the same time she couldn’t help it. She’d known what it was the day she’d said I do. Nyle was a great distraction and had been for the past two years. But the relationship was missing one key ingredient: Unconditional, unrequited, passionate love. The last few months of matrimony had been blissful but they had also been hard. The mantra was repeated over and over in her mind several times a day, but it was still bullshit and she knew it. She loved Nyle. She loved him very much… But…Not in the way a woman should love a man or her husband.
She had been married for almost a year, but the ugly truth still remained: She wasn’t in love with her husband. She had married him knowing she still loved another man. His former best friend. His rival. Her first love. Tristan. Tristan was on her mind, morning, noon, and night and try hard as she might to lock him away from her heart forever, her mind always dug him back up.
Nyle was the best thing that had ever happened to her. When she spoke those words in her head, she meant them. Getting her heart to feel it was something else. Nyle was her best friend but her feelings for him hadn’t transformed to heels over heels in love like she’d hoped. To be fair, she did enjoy Nyle as a lover. Nyle was passionate, expressive, fearlessly dominant, experimental, and unselfish. It was hard not be responsive to him.
He was very attractive and oozed sexual energy that was hard to ignore or deny. It wasn’t hard for her body to respond to him. Her body loved Nyle and the way he made it feel. The man knew what to do and how to do it. Pulling multiple orgasms from her was not a problem for him and getting and keeping her wet was even more effortless. Nyle was an ardent, extremely passionate lover and he couldn’t get enough of her. She loved making love to him and making him feel good. But it wasn’t like it’d been with…
Tears sprang to Serenity’s eyes and threatened to fall. She quickly blinked them away and got up from the table. She walked to the storage closet and grabbed a broom, mop, bucket, and cleaning supplies. She commenced to cleaning like a mad woman. She was trying to do everything she could to keep her mind busy and off Tristan. She and Nyle had a maid that came in twice a week so everything she was doing was a waste of time. Their place was spotless and ridiculously neat.
Cleaning wasn’t helping anyway.
She couldn’t erase the memory of the last day she’d seen him. Her wedding day. The hurt in his eyes. The betrayal. The love. The anger. The gun. She and Ricky had briefly discussed it. She talked to Katherine every day, but they hadn’t talked about him being at the church but one time since she’d gotten back from her honeymoon. Katherine neglected to mention the gun, as did Serenity. They did a good job avoiding the subject. Serenity knew his mother knew. Ricky had told Serenity what happened in the hallway with Tristan and the gun. He told her if he Tristan’s mom hadn’t intervened; he didn’t know what would’ve happened. She couldn’t thank Ricky and Katherine enough for stopping Tristan. Had he had the opportunity to go through with it and shot Nyle…
Serenity shuddered at the thought and tried not to cry. It was useless. The tears came anyway.
“Why can’t I stop loving him?” she moaned out loud. “Why?”
When she was with Nyle it was all good but the moment she was out of his presence… The other morning in the shower she’d had to stop herself from masturbating as she thought about Tristan. Her insides turned sour and came alive at the same time. Her heart pumped harder. Her loins pulsated and contracted without her permission. Just whispering his name on her lips was enough to give her an orgasm without contact. She tried to tell herself it was because he was her first love. Then it was because he was her first. But all of that was bullshit. He hadn’t been the best boyfriend but the love between them had been as real as the mop she held in her hand. They’d loved as hard as they fought. They went through some horrible shit, but they did it together. She just knew it was going to be forever. She hated she would never get to experience that with him.
Serenity blew her nose with a paper-towel and glanced over at the landline phone on the wall as it began to ring. She leaned the mop against the island and went to answer it. She gleefully smiled with relief when she saw Kara’s name on the caller ID.
She wiped at her eyes, cleared her throat and picked up the phone. “Hello?”
“Hello love!” Kara sing-songed in her nasal, raspy voice. “I haven’t heard from you in a while, so I thought I’d call. You know, just to remind you that I’m still here. I know bitches get married and conveniently get short-term amnesia- “
“You know it’s not even like that.”
“No offense taken; I promise. Shit, I don’t blame you. I know if Nyle was my man I’d never let his ass out of bed. He wouldn’t be able to breathe or get a moment to himself. He’d be like ‘Please Kara, get off of me. Let me live my life. Let me go outside.’ I’d be like ‘Nooo, now get back in that bed and lie down so I can sit on your face and hop up and down’.”
Serenity threw her head back and guffawed. “Kara!”
“Come on girl; don’t act like you’re not sitting on that beautiful face at least five to six times a day.”
Serenity chuckled again and leaned against the stove. “No one has time or energy to be fucking all day Kara.”
Unless you’re with Tristan. Memories. Fuck! Those inconvenient, tormenting memories!
Serenity lightly smacked herself repeatedly on the head and prayed for those memories t
o eject themselves from her mind.
“Speak for yourself lady; Nyle is irresistibly fuckable, and you are damn lucky to have him,” Kara slyly marveled.
Serenity shook her head and smiled. She didn’t take offense to Kara’s comments; she was used to it. Kara was her best friend, but she was also unapologetically thirsty. She had been single for years and had no prospects in sight. She didn’t have kids and she was yearning for that validation to go on her finger. She talked a lot of shit, but she was not a competitive friend. Kara was the last person Serenity would ever have to worry about with Nyle. She knew she could trust Kara and that her friend only wanted the best for her. She knew she was genuinely happy for her.
“So, what’s been up with you guys?” Kara continued. “You pregnant yet?”
Serenity rolled her eyes. “Nope. Not trying to be. My IUD and I are best friends.”
“You don’t want to have babies with that gorgeous man? You’re nuts. Do you know how beautiful your children would be?”
Mine All Mine : Book One Page 8
