Well This Sucks

by CoraLee June

  I raised my eyebrows at him. “Ryan, you and I both know it was me who beat the shit out of Lenny Frankford in ninth grade for calling you the F word and stealing your homework.”

  Ryan rolled his eyes. “I’ve had a growth spurt since then. And I might have once been a nerd, but I’m now the boss of the nerds. Give me some credit. Come over? We can play video games or get drunk or both.”

  “Nooo!” I replied with a pout. “I want to go out. Please?”

  “Fine,” Ryan argued. “But I want the limited-edition dildo that was modeled after Tommy Two-Foot. You know I love his videos on Pornhub. It’s like art.”

  “Fine,” I replied with a smile. I was already planning on gifting it to Ryan once we got the molds. “I’ll meet you at Bites Bar in thirty minutes.”

  “Uh, Bites Bar? You mean that creepy as fuck underground club that usually has a line wrapped around the front? How the hell are we going to get in? And isn’t it a sex club?”

  I shrugged. “I’ve always wanted to try that place, and for some reason, I feel like I’m supposed to go there tonight. If we can’t get in, we can just go across the street to Haven.”

  “Okay. I’ll meet you out front,” Ryan replied with a frown.

  “Byeeee,” I said before hanging up. I then dialed Yasmin’s phone, but it went straight to voicemail. Yep, she already had her Do Not Disturb on for the night. Her loss.

  I found a red dress that barely covered my vagina and put it on. The straps delicately rested on my shoulders, and it clung to my generous hips. My boobs were practically spilling out of it. I hadn’t worn this little number since I was bouncing between frat houses in college, but it was an icon in my sexy dress repertoire. It looked good with my long legs and tan skin.

  I brushed on some dark eyeshadow and lined my hazel eyes with a pencil called Blacker Than Black. I looked oddly pale today, probably from the weird hangover. I decided not to bother with blush, though, because I knew once I started dancing, my cheeks would flush with a rosy glow. I finished off my makeup with a swipe of deep red lipstick on my plush lips. Something about red made me feel powerful and sexy. After fluffing my long wavy hair, which seemed extra voluminous and glossy tonight, I threw on my only pair of sparkly silver heels and practically ran out the door.

  The night air felt so nice that I decided to walk instead of calling an Uber. Normally, I would never walk by myself this late at night, but I was feeling emboldened for some reason. The world was on my side. Last night might have creeped me out, but I wanted to feel strong and capable again. I was taking back the fucking night. I was in control. Just as I was congratulating myself on my empowerment, some old perv honked and yelled, “Show me your tits!” as he drove by.

  I flipped him off and kept walking. It’s okay, one creep wasn’t going to derail my night. Not tonight. There was a feeling growing inside my chest, something that I had never felt before. It was like answering a siren’s call: I had to move forward, following the signal that was guiding me, pulling me closer. Every step that brought me closer to the club made me feel more alive.

  Bites Bar was located on a busy street, and its lights twinkled up ahead. As I passed a massive church, a shiver went up my spine. I really should have brought a jacket. I walked as fast as my super cute, but not super practical, heels would let me.

  I found Ryan waiting in the insanely long line, looking like he wanted to be at his apartment snuggled under a blanket, or anywhere that wasn’t here. As I approached the front of the club, the feeling in my chest had intensified to the point I was sure it had to be glowing.

  “Hey, old man, glad you made it,” I teased.

  Ryan tugged at his leather jacket and shifted his weight from side to side. He looked nice, in his typical quirky way. His cartoon shirt and skinny jeans fit his slender yet toned build well. “You owe me. You better not back out on your end of the deal,” Ryan said. He did not look amused.

  “I solemnly swear to bring you the Tommy Two-Foot cock. I’ll even include the suction cup attachment so you can have fun in the shower.”

  “You better,” Ryan said while giving me a stern look.

  We had barely been waiting for five minutes when a tall man wearing a bouncer’s T-shirt approached us, staring at me with glassy, lifeless eyes. It felt like he was trying to look all the way into my soul. “Come with me.”

  “Me?” I asked while looking down at my dress. Oh yeah. This sexy little number did the trick.

  He huffed. “Yes.”

  I had never gotten to skip a line before, so I was feeling myself. My inner goddess was fist pumping the air. That’s right. I’ve still got it. I reached out for Ryan’s hand and pulled him along with me. The bouncer gave Ryan a dirty look, but he didn’t say anything. He led us up to the front and unclasped the black velvet rope to let us pass. People in the line who had been waiting for hours groaned.

  I felt it in my gut. Tonight was my lucky night.

  Diego

  The screams were tedious.

  Torturing people was always the same.

  Threats. Pain. Bloodshed. Death.

  My second in command tore Lawrence Wright’s ear off with his bare hands, and the slimy vamp was being a total pussy about it.

  “Please! Stop!”

  Ah, I forgot that step. The pleading. They always begged, didn’t they?

  Being king had its perks, but when overseeing a supernatural race of killers, you had to rule with an iron fist. I rolled my neck before speaking. “You turned your grandmother, who was suffering from dementia,” I replied in a bored tone. “You know the rules. No children. No elderly. The change could have killed her, and now we have an uncontrollable variable on the streets.”

  Lawrence, a lower ranking vampire who was turned just last year, whimpered. He knew the rules. Not a vampire in my coven could turn anyone without my explicit permission. Hell, some spouses had to petition for years before I allowed it. We took many things into consideration. Mental aptitude. Physical fitness. Social life and careers. We didn’t want just anyone changing, nor did we want to uproot someone’s life who wasn’t completely prepared for the changes that came with becoming a creature of the night. All my vampires were expected to accept that this was a gift, not a right I refused to change immortality chasers, and this fucking idiot went and turned his grandmother because he felt bad watching her age. He’d feel even worse when I put a stake through her heart.

  “But it cured her dementia,” he argued. “She’s transitioning well!”

  “I need a list of all the people she’s fed from since being turned,” I demanded.

  “B-but I already checked. Grams didn’t use any venom.”

  I rolled my eyes. “Forgive me for not taking your word for it. I need a list. Now. Write it down before I tear each of your fingers off and feed them to my dog.”

  “I don’t even know their names,” he argued. “Hell, one was just some girl I was making out with in an alley.”

  I eyed my second in command, Rocky, and nodded. My ever-loyal muscle surged forward and broke every bone in Lawrence’s hand with a single blow. The weaker vampire cried out in pain, his shrill cries echoing off the walls. What kind of asshole made out with a girl in an alley, then fed her to his grandmother?

  “A list. Now. Since it’ll take your hand at least an hour to heal, and I don’t feel like setting the bones, you’ll have to relay as much information as you can to Rocky before he slices up your pretty boy face. Cuts heal fast, and Rocky doesn’t like watching his hard work disappear. He’ll cut you again, and again, and again.”

  “Sir,” Claire interrupted. I gave Lawrence one more look before walking over to the doorway where one of my best friends stood. She was wearing a little black dress and had mischief in her eyes. She was ever the elegant vampire, moving with stealth and grace. Claire was beautiful and the most helpful member on the council, but I didn’t fuck the people I employed. “There is an undocumented fledgling at Bites Bar. One of the bouncers found her standing
in line outside.”

  I growled in frustration. Lawrence Wright just signed his own death warrant. Bites Bar was our haven, it was spelled to attract all vampires in the vicinity. It was like a moth to a flame. It helped me keep track of visitors and fledglings. One way or another, they all eventually wandered into Bites. “Does she look like she’s had her first feed?”

  “No. She’s in the euphoria stage.”

  I pinched the bridge of my nose. I hated euphoria. It was easily the worst part of transitioning. I didn’t particularly enjoy the excess of it all. Vampires went through three stages while going through their transformation. First was the exhaustion—their system overloaded with their heightened senses. Then came the euphoria. They felt high on life, capable of anything. Most changelings ended up killing themselves during the euphoria stage, doing something stupid like jumping off a cliff without a parachute. After that, came the hunger. That was the worst part. It was a bottomless pit of ravenous need with nowhere to go. Their fangs didn’t come in until the very last minute. And then? The moment they took their first drink of blood, they became a full-fledged vampire. If they didn’t drink—they died.

  “Want us to bring her in?” Claire asked. She was clutching her clipboard and waiting for my answer. We both knew what would happen. Without the proper vetting, I’d have to kill this innocent human before she got to the hungry stage. There were protocols to follow. Our coven was full of elites. We only allowed worthy people to join our ranks.

  “You said she’s at Bites?” I asked while adjusting my cufflinks.

  “Yes. She’s dancing with a friend. Going a bit wild, as to be expected.”

  I nodded. “I suppose I should go see for myself. We both know what needs to be done, but I like to investigate thoroughly. Maybe we’ll get lucky and she’s an heiress. The council loves to make excuses for rich people. Greedy bastards,” I said. Claire laughed. I didn’t even mean for it to be a joke. They really were more likely to be accepting of someone with a fat wallet.

  “I’ll get your limo ready.” Claire disappeared into the hallway, and I watched her walk away while clenching my jaw. Bites Bar was ten miles away from the tower. It was a short drive, but anything could happen. Hell, this new vamp probably already killed someone.

  “Boss,” Rocky asked. “What do you want me to do with this asshole?”

  I straightened my spine and didn’t bother turning around to face the pathetic waste of space. Fixing my tie, I answered Rocky with a steel voice. “Make an example of him. I want him to be unrecognizable at the court hearing.”

  Lawrence Wright’s screams filled the air as I walked away.

  I saw her the moment we walked out onto the balcony overlooking the club. The walls, decor, and floor were painted black. The music was sensual, and the people were enchanted by the seductive environment. I loved this bar. It was the one place local vampires could freely be themselves. Thirty years ago, I employed a witch to help keep it protected. It was like our own little Vegas: what happened here, fucking stayed here. Thanks to the spell, a human wouldn’t remember having fangs plunged into their neck, nor would they remember the orgies happening on the tables surrounding them. They’d go home and think they spent the night getting drunk and dancing the night away.

  There was a group of vampires fucking in a corner and another vamp sinking his fangs into the supple thigh of a human wearing a purple mini dress. It was chaos. It was dark, lusty, and perfect. This was the fucking life. Too bad I was always too busy to enjoy it all.

  I’d gone to this club prepared to get rid of an unsanctioned fledgling, but she drew my attention and held it captive. I found her instantly. Her red dress made her stand out like a glittering jewel against onyx. I watched as she moved her hips in time to the music and draped her arms around her unenthusiastic dance partner, trying to coax him into having a good time. His obvious disdain compared to her wild fervor made me laugh.

  It was obvious that she was in the euphoria stage. She didn’t look like she had a care in the world. Her movements were dripping with freedom. Languid. Loose. Wild. I watched her for a lingering moment, my eyes focused only on her.

  An urge to take his place and feel her body against mine raced through my thoughts. The desire was fleeting at first, but the longer I watched her, the more I wanted her. I couldn’t explain it, but I needed her. I felt like I was the moth to a flame. I was obsessed.

  “You okay, sir?” Claire asked. She was watching me carefully.

  “Leave me be,” I grumbled in response before moving toward the black spiral staircase and descending them slowly, never breaking my line of sight with my enticing new fledgling.

  I told myself that my interest was because I needed to confront this issue. I was only watching because I needed to figure out the best way to take care of this little problem, an unsanctioned fledgling in my jurisdiction that needed to be handled swiftly. Everyone needed to know the rules and fear my wrath. The only reason our race survived was because we followed the rules, kept to ourselves, and didn’t turn humans every time we fed. The last man to break this law turned his son. I murdered them both in front of our entire coven. My heart was sinking at the idea of doing that to this woman, and I didn’t even know her.

  Moving effortlessly through the dense crowd, I made it to the dance floor as the woman singing on stage shifted to a slow, melancholy ballad. I walked up to the mismatched pair.

  “Can I have this dance?”

  She spun around with her hands held up but stopped when she saw me. Her friend was currently doing an awkward shuffle from side to side. I watched her perfect pout open and shut a couple times like a sexy goldfish. She looked me up and down, and it was thrilling to see her respond to me so easily. I raised my brow in challenge while taking a closer look at the illegal fledgling. Her long legs looked lethal. Her thick hair was slick with sweat, and her chest had glitter on it, drawing my eye to the healthy bit of cleavage there. She was fucking delicious. She finally gave her friend a nod, and he looked relieved. He left the dance floor immediately, probably to find a place to sit.

  “You are too beautiful,” I said in nearly a whisper, surprising myself as I put my hands on her waist. She closed the gap between us, pressing her hips against mine as she started to sway. The energy radiating off her was intoxicating. “I’m Diego.”

  “I’m Drew,” she replied breathily. I knew the effect I had on other vampires, especially new ones. They ached for my power. They desired to please me. It was almost instinctual.

  “Is that short for Drusilla?”

  “Like the vampire? I think the ambiance here might be getting to you,” she giggled. “No. It’s just Drew.”

  She put her hands on my chest and slowly slid them up, taking her time to feel the muscles underneath my shirt before wrapping her arms around my neck. Drew looked up at me, her bright hazel eyes gleaming under the layers of black makeup.

  “Have you been here before?” I asked.

  “Nope. I felt like trying something new. I’m in a spontaneous mood. Maybe I should have that threesome I’ve always fantasized about.”

  Yep, that was the euphoria talking. Ignoring her word vomit, I told her, “I own this bar.” And everyone in it. I wasn’t sure if I was trying to impress her with my comment or get her to talk more. Her voice was sensual.

  “I want to live in this bar,” she said in a faraway voice. “No. I want to stand on the bar and strip naked.”

  A strange sense of possessiveness crawled up my spine. “No,” I replied. “Not happening. Why don’t we go sit down for a bit, yes?”

  She scowled. “Don’t be such a buzzkill, Diego. Live on the wild side. You’re too pretty to be so serious. Do you deep condition your hair? It’s glossy and black and full and… ” I blinked at her as she stared at my hair. “And you’re tall. I could climb you like a tree. And muscular. I could rest my thighs on those massive shoulders of yours. And those lips are so pouty. I mean seriously, you could be a porn star. Well. I’d have
to check your skills first. In fact…”

  Drew leaned closer, grinning as she stared at my lips. I knew what she was thinking about far before she acted on it, but I was still surprised when her soft lips brushed against mine. She kissed like she wanted to be kissed. Insistent. Soft yet demanding. Breathy. It was electric. I pushed her, daring her to take this deeper. She gasped and nipped at my bottom lip.

  Everything in the club melted away except for her. She gripped my head, as if to keep me from escaping, not that I wanted to. I was happy to stay here for eternity, lapping up her honey tongue and sucking on her pillowy lip. My fangs were sensitive, and I wondered what it would feel like if she ran her tongue across their sharp peaks. Would she taste sweet? Would her blood call to mine? I completely lost myself in her, only coming back to reality when she pulled away. Fuck, who was this girl? I placed my palms on her hips, clutching her close. I never wanted to let go. I didn’t understand this all-consuming need, but I liked it.

  Her eyes swam with the same lust stirring inside me. I knew I would regret it later, as every single person who worked in this bar was one of mine, and damn did they like to gossip. But now, I didn’t care. I went back in for another kiss, this time parting her lips with my tongue so that I could taste her. She explored my mouth. She gripped my suit jacket, balling the fabric in her fists while rubbing up against me. I was hard as stone. My arms were like steel, pressing her closer to me as I sucked on her bottom lip.

  A fleeting thought dampened the moment, but I pushed it away the moment it invaded my mind. I knew I needed to kill this little fledgling, but I wanted to enjoy her first.

  “Wow,” she said while pulling away. She licked her lips, savoring the feel of me. “Why do I want to jump your bones right now?” she asked jokingly before looking around the crowded room with hooded lids. When her eyes landed on the orgy, her brows shot up in surprise. “Guess I’m not the only one with that idea…” A human woman was splayed out on the table, her legs spread wide as a man licked at her clit.