"I'll take care of it."
"How?" Her thunderous eyes meet mine. "She's already falling for you, Raphael. I can see it."
The words ignite my heart and I glance at the car where Willa is waiting for me. This shouldn't excite me, but I can't fucking help it. I want Willa. Elise is long forgotten by now, and I'm going to end things with her, cut off all ties, tonight.
"I'm sorry, Dove."
I walk to the car while she watches me. She doesn't say another word, but I feel the weight of her gaze on my back as I get in the car with Willa. She grabs my hand and I make eye contact with her. She's panicking, I can tell.
"It's going to be okay," I mutter. "You can come and stay in my apartment tonight."
"What about..."
"Elise?" I shake my head. "I have another place. One she doesn't know about."
Willa nods mutely as I drive to my hidden bachelor pad in the city. A lot of women have passed through this apartment building, and bringing Willa here feels almost dirty. Still, she doesn't say a word as I guide her into the building and lock the door of my apartment behind us.
"This is a nice place," she whispers, sitting awkwardly on the white leather couch.
"Wills, I should've taken you somewhere else," I mutter. "This... this place isn't worthy of you."
"Why didn't you take me home?"
My expression must speak volumes as she grimaces before saying, "Oh. Because she's there."
"Yes, Elise is currently in my apartment," I admit. "But I want you to know, Willa, our arrangement... that's all it is. A business deal."
"You don't love her?" I shake my head, making her frown. "Then why are you engaged?"
I was afraid of this question, and now that it's come up, I know I have to tell Willa the truth.
"I haven't told you much about myself, have I?"
Willa shakes her head. "I don't know anything. Do you have family?"
I give a shrug. "My mother died fifteen years ago, and my father died when I was young. He was a photographer, like me, but I always struggled to live up to his name. He was a war photographer, interested in culture. He wanted to shock the nation with his images. He always looked down on me, for being just a fashion photographer. But I did that because I knew what my father's absence did to our family."
"He wasn't around much when you were younger?"
I shake my head. "Never. I barely even knew him. And yet I lived my whole life in his shadow."
"I'm sorry, Daddy."
Her words send shivers down my spine and I manage a smile. "When I turned fifty... I realized it was almost too late for me to have a family, a life I envisioned for myself. Without wanting to, I'd walked down the same path my father had taken. I was a loner, without anyone to love, without children I wanted so badly, without a meaningful life."
"So, Elise..."
"Elise is my ex," I mutter. "And she found herself in the same predicament, though she's a little younger than me. We agreed to build a marriage and have a child together, while leaving our relationship open. Though it quickly became apparent this meant more to her than me."
"So now you're stuck."
"I'll break it off, trouble."
"But she won't like that."
I grin. "I don't give a fuck. I want you."
"Do you?"
When I raise my eyes to meet hers, I see the doubt in her gaze and it cuts fucking deep. "Why are you questioning that?"
"Because." She shrugs, not giving a straight answer, and I sit down next to her, pulling her onto my lap so she's straddling me.
"Not good enough, trouble. Tell me the truth."
"I can't compare to her." She won't meet my eyes, so I cage her cheeks with my hands and force her to look at me.
"To Elise? Why?"
"She's older, smarter, successful, beautiful. I'll never be like her. Or at least not for a few years. And I'm not ready for a baby."
"I know," I mutter, kissing her lips. I don't know how to explain it, but none of that matters to me anymore. All I care about is Willa being mine, for ever. "It doesn't matter to me. As long as I can have you."
She heaves a sigh, leaning her forehead against my chest. "I'm tired, Daddy."
"Let's get you to bed."
I lift her up in my arms and carry her to the master bedroom. She looks tiny in it, tucked into the white sheets with her eyes growing heavier and heavier with every blink.
"You need to rest up, trouble," I mutter. "We'll deal with everything tomorrow."
"Tomorrow." She nods, yawning as she stretches. "And tonight, you'll hold me until I fall asleep?"
I smile to myself. "Of course, trouble."
Chapter 13
Willa
Raphael holds me close that night, but when I wake up the next morning, the space in the bed next to me is empty.
I pad out into the kitchen, still wearing his shirt. "Good morning."
Raphael looks up from the stove. "Morning, trouble. Hungry?"
I nod, yawning. The events from last night are only now trickling back in, and my stomach tightens into knots when I remember Nox being taken away in handcuffs. It's because of me that happened.
Dove and the boys must really hate me right now. The thought gives me anxiety and I force it out of my head, unable to deal with the weight of what I've done.
Raphael sets a plate of blueberry pancakes in front of me and I hungrily dig in. There's relaxing music playing in the background, and he must notice my thoughts aren't here as he doesn't ask any questions.
Finally, once I've finished my food, I take my plate to the sink, wash it and place it on the rack to dry before leaning back against the counter. I catch Raphael's gaze and he comes over, caging my body under his and gently tucking my hair behind my ear.
"You okay, trouble?"
I shrug, not knowing what to tell him. The truth is, I'm far from okay. This whole mess happened because of me. Because Raphael knew my parents before he knew me.
"Tell me about it," I whisper.
"About what?"
"You and Dove, and... Nox. There must be some bad blood there."
He gives me a strained smile. "You could say that."
"So, what happened?"
"Same old story," he shrugs. "Your mother picked your father over me. And I was bitter for a long time. Until I met you, actually."
"How did I change things?"
"You made me feel things I've never felt before."
"You didn't feel this was really about Dove?"
"No," Raphael mutters. "It was never reciprocated with her. And through the years, my feelings deteriorated into something malicious and ugly. I wanted to be with her just for the sake of taking her away from Nox. It took meeting you to realize how wrong that was."
“Why? What did I do?”
“It’s simple, sweet Willa. You are so very different.”
"How am I different?"
"In every possible way, trouble." He grins, kissing me on the lips with surprising gentleness. "You're nothing like Dove, and I love that. You're unpredictable. Whip-smart. You take chances, you live on the edge, you're a troublemaker. And you know Daddy loves troublemakers."
I can't help but smile at his words. They make me feel all warm and fuzzy, like he truly cares about me. "What about Elise?"
"That's over," he shakes his head resolutely. "I'll tell her today after I take you back home."
I furrow my brows. "I thought I was staying with you from now on."
His eyes find mine and I see worry in them as he says, "If your parents agree to that, I'd love nothing more. But I don't think they do. Which means I have to take you back. I can't be the reason you're arguing with Dove and Nox, Willa."
"But..." I pout, not liking his answer one bit. "I don't want to go back home."
"Why not?"
"Because." I stubbornly cross my arms.
"Because why? You have to talk to me, trouble. I can't help you if you don't."
"I don't belong there."
>
"Why are you saying that?"
I shrug, pouting still. "Dove and Nox have their twins. They don't need me. I never fitted in with them."
"Did they tell you that?"
"No," I mutter. "But it's obvious. I'm a plus one to their party of four. I'm not part of the family."
"I think it's not that bad," Raphael says gently, rubbing my shoulder. "It'll be okay, trouble. You have me now, and I'm here to help you with everything."
I scoff. "But Dove and Nox hate you."
"Nothing that can't be changed over time, trouble." He gives me a devilish look. "And I'll do my best to get on their good side, because I'm determined to keep you at my side."
"But..." I chew my bottom lip, already worrying. "You're still going to force me to go back, aren't you?"
"I'm not going to force you, Willa. But I think you should know they need you back there."
"They do not need me." I pull out of his reach when he tries to hold me, pacing the room. All my insecurities are coming out now, demanding for me to destroy something, show Raphael how angry I am about this and how badly I want to stay with him. "I'm not ever going back. I'll sleep on the damn street if I have to."
"You don't have to sleep on the street. But I do want you to go back home and sort things out."
“That is never gonna happen,” I tell him. “I’m not going!”
My voice is dripping with venom. I barely recognize myself like this. In a far-off part of my brain, I realize these are just my abandonment issues out to play yet again. But I can't help myself. My fear of being rejected has never been triggered like this. I'd rather push everyone around me away than admit it, though. If I do, they'll just get rid of me and toss me aside like I'm worthless.
"Willa." Raphael faces me with a determined expression. "I don't want to argue with you. I already called Dove. Nox is back from the police station."
As much as I want to ask whether he's okay, I can't bring myself to say it. Instead, I focus on his other statement, my eyes widening. "You called Dove behind my back?"
"Just to let her know you're safe," Raphael replies calmly. "And that I'd have you home tonight."
"I can't believe you did that." My shaky hands form fists. "I can't believe you called her behind my back. You're just using me, Raphael. You're just doing this so you can get back with Dove."
"What?" He laughs, which only pisses me off more. "That's not true at all, Wills."
"I don't believe you!" I run my trembling fingers through my hair, trying to force myself to relax and failing miserably. "I don't believe a word you're saying. You just want to get rid of me. Just like everyone else."
"Willa, please. I'm not lying to you, why would I?"
He tries to make me see reason, but I'm too far gone to believe him. I've already zeroed in on the worst possible belief – that he doesn't care about me at all.
"You just want me gone," I whisper. "You're just trying to erase me, like I never even existed."
"Where's this coming from?" He looks frustrated. "Why do you think that, Wills? It's not true."
"It is!" I'm screaming now, tearing at my hair as my breaths start coming faster and faster. "It is, it is, it is! You want me fucking gone!"
I feel the panic seeping through my blood into my bones and into the very marrow of who I am. I try telling myself to calm down. That this is just my anxiety, a panic attack of the worst kind, taking over me and forcing me to behave this way. But it's too late. The part of me that would rather hurt whoever it takes is in charge now, and she's calling the shots.
Raphael chases after me but I don't let him touch me, screaming and pushing over a dining chair as he comes after me.
"Don't fucking touch me!" I hiss. "I should've known I'm nothing to you! I'm fucking nothing to everyone..."
Angry tears spill down my cheeks as he tries to approach me. I grab a carafe of wine off the bar stand and break it. Blood red liquid seeps into the hardwood floor while I sob, holding the broken glass.
"Don't you dare fucking touch me. I know what I am to you. I know you think I'm worthless."
"Willa..." Raphael swallows thickly.
The version of me I've locked in a dark place inside my head recognizes how worried he is, that he wants to help me. But the Willa running the show tells her she's worthless. He'll just judge me and try to get rid of me for this freak-out. And it's better that it happens now than to drag this out for so long that it will really hurt me.
But I'm already hurting.
I'm hurting so fucking bad, and it's all my fucking fault.
"Please don't hurt yourself," Raphael begs me, his voice breaking. "Hurt me if you're angry. Put the glass down, Willa."
My hands shake even more, the glass unsteady in my grip. How does he know I want to hurt myself? Maybe he isn't so bad after all. Maybe he does see me for who I am. Maybe the Willa in control right now is wrong.
I take a deep breath and the glass falls from my hand. Raphael steps forward and envelops me in a bear hug I can't return because I'm shaking too hard. I sob against his chest uselessly.
"Willa, don't worry," he whispers against my hair. "I'll take care of you. For ever. I'll make sure you're safe and happy. For ever. You're mine now, trouble. For ever."
Slowly, his words seep into my thoughts and drown out all the doubts I'm having.
"Do I have to go back?" I ask brokenly.
"I don't want you to," he admits. "But we both know your family needs you, Wills. You need to make sure they're okay before you come stay with me permanently."
My doubtful eyes find his as I ask, "Do you even want that?"
"I want nothing more, trouble," he smiles to reassure me. "Now come on, we'll sit down and talk about what happened."
I let him lead me to the white leather couch where I sit on his lap.
"You must think I'm crazy," I whisper.
"No, I don't." His voice is clear and determined. "But I know something I've done must have triggered this. Are you feeling better?"
I nod and he brushes his fingers through my hair. "I'm sorry."
"You don't have to apologize for your feelings, Willa. Ever." He smiles at me softly. "But I want to help. Are Dove and Nox not being nice to you?"
I shake my head, feeling miserable. "They're amazing. They give me everything I want."
"Then why don't you want to go back?"
"Because I..." I swallow. "I don't belong with them. I want to belong with you."
"You do," he's quick to reassure me. "But they need you more than I do right now. And we can't be selfish and ignore that. Do you understand? As much as I want to keep you here for ever, it would be wrong, Willa."
I nod, feeling miserable. I don't want him to be right. I want to forget all about the family I never felt part of and replace them all with Raphael.
As if he's reading my thoughts, he says, "Don't you love them, Willa? Dove, Nox and the boys?"
I think of the twins and their crazy pranks and shenanigans.
I think of Nox with his quiet, brooding attitude and the reluctant smiles he gives me.
I think of Dove, so caring, so warm, so loving.
And I find myself nodding.
"See." Raphael kisses me again. "Maybe you can be without them, but right now, they can't be without you. And sometimes, it's on you to take care of other people when they need you."
"I guess," I whisper. "But this doesn't mean we're over, right?"
He grins at my pleading gaze, tugging on my long strands of hair. "Why would it?"
"It would be an easy way for you to back out," I mumble. "Because my parents don't like you... It gives you a good excuse to break things off. Go back to your normal life."
"I don't want a normal life," he says resolutely. "I want trouble."
Chapter 14
Raphael
It's been three days since I took Willa back to Dove and Nox's place. Three days of going fucking crazy, trying not to be overbearing and hover over her like a fucking shado
w.
On the day I drove her back, I broke things off with Elise. She was pissed to say the least. Since then, I've been staying in my apartment, waiting for her to get her stuff out of my place. I have a feeling I'll have to sell the penthouse. I can't stay there with Willa, not now that Elise has been there. Maybe Willa can help me pick out another place where we can live together.
I shake my head to get the thoughts out. I'm letting this go too far. I need to take things slow if I want to earn Dove and Nox's respect. Right now, they fucking hate me more than ever.
The other problem is, yesterday another blackmail note arrived. This one had photos of me with Willa, with an ominous note scribbled on it.
Get rid of the girl, or I'll ruin her life and yours with it.
I still don't know who's sending these cryptic messages. I don't think it's Nox – he would never threaten Willa. But who has it in for me? Who wants to see me and my girl break up?
I crumple the photograph in my hand and throw it into the trash can before sauntering out of the office. Dylan's leaning against my receptionist's desk, chatting her up, and I grin at them as I pass.
"Heading out, Mr. Santino?" the woman asks with a timid smile. "We'll see you on Monday."
"Indeed," I nod. "Take care, don't forget to lock up."
As I take the elevator to the underground garage, I try not to get too excited about tonight. Still, it's the first time I'm seeing Willa since I took her back home. I feel like a goddamn teenager as I drive my Mercedes to her parents' place. She's already waiting on the curb, but unfortunately for me, so are Dove and Nox.
They glare at me as I get out of the car and I nod at them mutely before Willa throws herself at me, jumps into my arms and wraps her legs tightly around my waist.
"I missed you," she breathes against my neck.
"I missed you too, trouble." I kiss her hair and let her down before facing the music. Her parents seem pretty fucking pissed and I'm surprised my bones are still intact since Nox looks ready to pop a blood vessel.
"We want her back by midnight," Nox spits at me.
"You got it."
"No drugs, booze, or anything we wouldn't approve of," Dove cuts in, throwing me an icy stare.
Tyrant Daddy: An Age Gap Forbidden Romance Page 9
