“What are you saying, Mom?”
“That you need to see your sisters in a different light. They’re not the girls they were when you left. That was almost four years ago. They did the work of my sons during the war – especially before we got the POWs.”
Eugene looked down at the floor, weighing her words. He brushed his foot over the worn linoleum. “You’re right. I do still think of them as kids.” He shook his head. “I’ve missed out on four years of their lives. I forget that they’ve grown and changed.”
“They plowed and took care of the animals. Milked the cows and sold it at the market, along with eggs. I consulted them in all decisions. I discussed the finances with Ursula and relied heavily on her judgment. They have good heads on their shoulders. Jessica’s worked hard on becoming a teacher and never let it get in the way of her work on the farm. Ursula’s a mother now, but that hasn’t stopped her from doing any of her daily chores. She had big dreams of going to college. And now what hope does she have? Sometimes I see her paging through her schoolbooks and it breaks my heart.”
“Jeez, I feel like a heel.” Eugene plopped down at the kitchen table and stared out at the bleak winter sky. “Sorry, Mom. I’ll try to do better.”
“I know you will.” Kate placed her hand on his shoulder. “I know what you’re made of. And I know you’ve got your own worries. But you were always close with your sisters and I don’t want you to lose that.”
Eugene leaned his elbows on the table, regarding his mother with love. “You always did keep us all in line. I was on my own for so long. I guess I got a little isolated, and selfish.”
“I’m sure you had to be that way, to survive. But you’re home now. And we need you. Being the eldest, you always had a big influence on the others.”
When he smiled at her, Kate caught a glimmer of her son before he left for war. Her heart swelled to know that he was still there, and that time and healing would slowly bring him back.
Jessica ran down the stairs and came into the kitchen. “I’m ready when you are.” She looked around. “Where’s Ursula?”
“Out walking,” said Kate. She checked her handbag and closed it with a snap. “We’ll go as soon as she’s back.”
“You don’t have to wait. I’ll be here,” said Eugene.
“What if Frankie wakes?” Kate considered it but then shook her head. “I’ll call Mildred and let her know we’ll be a few minutes late.”
“I know what to do. Warm up the milk, check the temperature.” Eugene mimed shaking a few drops on his wrist. “I remember doing it for you, Jess.”
“For me?” Jessica was incredulous. “Is that true, Mom?”
“Eugene was the eldest and was a big help to me with all you kids. Especially you and Paul. He’d watch you for hours. Pull you around the farm in the wagon. Remember that, Eugene?” Kate asked from the hallway, pulling out her coat from the closet.
“Sure do. Paul liked to ride on my shoulders. You liked the wagon.”
“Did I?” asked Jessica. “I remember that old wagon. I remember trying to sit in it after you gave it a fresh coat of paint and getting red paint all over my clothes.”
“And face,” Eugene added with a chuckle.
Kate came back into the kitchen with her coat and hat on. “Well, since Frankie is in good hands, we can leave.”
Jessica gave Eugene an impulsive hug. “Can we bring you anything from town?”
He laughed. “No. And take your time. Frankie and I will hold down the fort.”
Mrs. Bloomfield and Kate chatted all the way into town. Jessica sat in the back seat, staring out at the snow-covered fields and woods. She did her best not to think about Clem. She couldn’t help but wonder if there was someone he was sweet on, something he was keeping to himself. She saw how the girls looked at him in town. Everyone thought he was handsome. And kind. Her childhood affection for him had grown into something deeper. And it hurt that he didn’t want her.
They pulled into town. “Look how busy the square is,” said Mildred Bloomfield. “Shirley will be sorry she missed it.”
“I’m sorry Ursula didn’t come,” added Kate, as she got out of the car. “Jessica, would you mind picking up some stamps for me? I still have a few more Christmas cards to send out.” She handed Jessica an extra dollar. “In case you want to stop at the soda fountain.”
“Thanks, Mom.”
Jessica stopped at the five-and-dime and browsed at crayons, paint sets, and colored paper for possible art projects for her students. For now, she purchased a small box of multi-colored foiled stars for when she graded papers. One of the older teachers criticized her for being too soft on the children, but Jessica firmly believed that encouragement and praise brought about the best results.
Then she went to Arnold’s and looked at fabric and a few of the ready-made dresses. She lingered over a pretty dress with pale buttercups and wispy green leaves. It would be a nice dress for teaching. She would think about it.
She walked around the town square, taking in all the decorations. Even though it was daytime, colored lights twined around the fir trees and added a sense of cheer to the overcast day. There was the Santa Claus house with its crooked little chimney. Soon there would be long lines of children waiting to see him. The square bustled with holiday shoppers and workers on their lunch break.
So many happy people. She tried to catch the holiday cheer, but her spirit remained weighted down with thoughts about Clem. Again, she tried not to think about him. She thought about the Christmas school play. She thought about her brothers coming home. And how happy they would all be, even if they didn’t make it home in time for Christmas. She thought about the Christmas dance and wondered if Clem would go. Probably not. She thought about Christmas baking, and how pretty their Christmas tree looked. She thought about the fluffy teddy bear for Frankie already wrapped and tucked under the Christmas tree. She thought about all these happy things and waited for that burst of joy that usually filled her. Maybe she was tired.
She made her way to the Post Office, stopping to admire the pine boughs twisted around the railings and the wreaths tied with big red bows on the double doors. She waited in the line of people sending and receiving packages. Everyone so happy and busy.
With a start, Jessica realized that the woman next in line was Mrs. Fletcher. She was sending a package.
“Afternoon, Mrs. Fletcher,” said the elderly clerk, Mr. Whiting. “I haven’t seen you in a long time. Nice to see you out and about.”
“I’m sending a present to my niece. It’s best to keep busy. Especially at the holidays.”
Jessica heard them chatting about the cold weather and the various Christmas drives and activities. She stared straight down at her shoes, hoping that Mrs. Fletcher would simply walk past her.
She turned her head and busied herself with her purse as Mrs. Fletcher passed by. Jessica exchanged a few words with Mr. Whiting and purchased her stamps. She slipped them in her purse and turned to leave.
There was Mrs. Fletcher, standing by the door as she pulled on her gloves. Jessica sensed that she was waiting for her. She pretended to see her just now. “Oh, hello Mrs. Fletcher.”
The woman gave a brief nod. “You’re Kate’s youngest.”
“Yes, ma’am. Jessica.”
“You used to pick my flowers.”
Jessica swallowed, bewildered. “I know. I’m sorry. They were always so pretty and – ”
“How’s Clem?”
Jessica stood speechless for a few moments. “I – I don’t know. I haven’t seen him.” She opened the door to leave, annoyed to find that Mrs. Fletcher was also leaving. Jessica held the door open for her.
The older woman raised her chin and looked down at Jessica. “Clem’s a good boy.”
Jessica bristled at the accusatory tone. “Yes, he is.”
“Kindhearted. Hard working. Loyal. You could do no better than Clem. I wouldn’t have expected him to fancy someone so young and flighty.”
&n
bsp; Jessica’s mouth dropped open. “He doesn’t! I mean, I’m not! I mean – ” Jessica took a deep breath and spoke calmly. “You’re mistaken on both points, Mrs. Fletcher. Goodbye.”
Mrs. Fletcher followed her down the steps. “Oh, come now. I saw how he looked at you. And his manner when he spoke about you when he came to lunch. I’m old but I’m not blind. I pretended not to notice, but when he took off his jacket, your photograph fell out of his pocket.”
Jessica’s cheeks turned pink. She noticed the creases of merriment at Mrs. Fletcher’s eyes. Was she making fun of her? Jessica gave a silent nod goodbye and walked briskly away. Had she looked back, she would have found the older woman smiling in full approval of her.
Jessica’s earlier despondency was now replaced with anger. She went into the soda fountain shop, took a seat at the counter, and ordered two scoops of vanilla ice cream with chocolate syrup. And whipped cream. She took a big bite and recalled every word of Mrs. Fletcher’s. Flighty? The nerve of that woman! And speaking to me as if I was out to hurt Clem. Had he said something against her to Mrs. Fletcher? But then what did she mean – ‘I saw the way he looked at you.’ Jessica couldn’t make sense of it.
The more she thought about it, the angrier she became. She decided there was only one thing to do. Action was always better than fretting. She paid, left the soda fountain, and made her way to Clem’s house. She took a deep breath and knocked at the door.
Donny answered, smiling widely. “Hi, Miss Jessica.”
“Afternoon, Donny. Is Clem home?”
Donny opened the door for her to step inside. “We were just working in the kitchen. Come on in.”
“I’ll wait out here, thank you.”
Donny left to get Clem, who soon appeared with a wrench in his hand. “Jessica?”
“I won’t keep you.” Though she tried to sound stern, her heart melted. Clem wore a deep green plaid shirt that brought out the color of his eyes. Only then did she realize how foolish she was being.
Clem waited expectantly.
Jessica gulped and tried to muster up her earlier anger. “I just ran into Mrs. Fletcher. She seems to think I’m after you and that it would be disastrous for you. Did you tell her anything?”
“Course not. There’s nothing to tell.”
Jessica blinked in frustration. “Exactly! That’s what I told her.” She waited for him to say something.
They stared at each other. Jessica’s feelings for Clem swelled, and her resolve to stand firm weakened. “Of course, there could be, if you weren’t so – ”
“So what?”
“So stubborn. And so against me trying to be friends with you.”
“I told you, Jessica, that’s not for us. Just leave it alone.”
“But why? You could at least give me a reason. Is something wrong with me? Do you and Mrs. Fletcher think I’m chasing all the boys, passing out my photograph?”
He opened his mouth to say something, but remained quiet, looking past her.
She took a sharp intake of breath. “So that’s it!”
Clem threw the wrench down and took a step towards her. “Sometimes a fella just needs to be alone. Can’t you understand?”
“No! I don’t see why we – ”
“Leave me alone, Jessica. I’m all messed up.”
She took a step forward, pained by his words. “Can’t I help?”
“You don’t know anything! And I don’t want your pity!”
He whipped around and slammed the door behind him.
“That’s not what I’m offering!” she yelled at the door. She waited a moment, and then ran down the steps and crossed the yard. “Oh, why did I come?”
“Miss Jessica!”
She turned around and saw Donny running after her.
He glanced behind him to make sure they were alone. “Clem didn’t mean that.”
“He despises me!” She sniffed and took a hankie from her pocket. “He thinks I’m flighty.”
“Nah, that’s not it. He’s just – I don’t know what it is. But I know he likes you.”
“Hardly!” Then she softened. “Thank you, Donny. I know you’re just trying to be nice.”
They walked quietly to the end of the street.
Donny stopped, uncertain about proceeding. “I know it’s none of my business – ”
“What? What is it? I can’t figure him out. One moment he’s nice and the next… Has he said something?”
“No. Nothing.” Donny appeared uncomfortable, as if unsure about speaking. “But all he does is look at that picture of you. That’s the only time he smiles. Honestly.”
Jessica’s mouth opened and then closed. “I don’t believe it!”
“It’s true, all right. He doesn’t know that I know, but he keeps your picture under his pillow. Then carries it around in his pocket. Just this morning I saw him looking at it. He put it away real quick and I pretended not to see it.”
She stood with her eyebrows creased.
Donny shrugged, as if he didn’t know what it all meant either. “Well, I better go.”
“Thank you, Donny,” Jessica called after him, as he ran back up the street.
Jessica walked slowly back to the town square, more confused than ever about Clem.
Chapter 15
When Tommy came home from school, Lillian made a quick trip to the corner grocery store to pick up a few items for her dinner with Izzy that night. She was delighted that Mrs. Mancetti had the cheese and olives in stock that Izzy so loved.
Lillian hurried home with her bag of groceries. She and the boys were looking forward to seeing Izzy. And thank goodness, Tommy was in a much better frame of mind, now that Amy would be finishing up the school year here. Mrs. Little had convinced her husband that it was to Amy’s benefit to do so. Tommy and Amy were already making plans for Tommy’s first visit to her over the summer.
When Lillian opened the door, she saw Tommy sitting on the couch with his schoolbooks. He jumped up to take the bag of groceries. “Getting your homework done?” Lillian asked, taking off her coat and hat.
Tommy frowned. “French. The project with Amy was fun, but this grammar is hard.” He brought the groceries to the kitchen.
Lillian peeked over at Charlotte. Still sound asleep. Then she turned, surprised to see Gabriel at the kitchen table, doing his school work.
“Gabriel! I thought you were at Scouts.”
“It was canceled for tonight. So, I’m getting started on my math homework.”
“Oh, what a shame! There was a young man outside, asking for you. A soldier – Army Air Forces. I told him you would be home in a few hours.” Lillian began to take out the groceries and set them on the counter. “I invited him to wait but he said he had a train to catch.”
Gabriel searched his mind. “The only soldiers I know have already gone home for Christmas or are still stuck in the hospital.”
“Maybe he had the wrong address,” said Tommy.
Gabriel gave it some thought. “Did he tell you his name?”
Lillian set the vegetables near the sink to rinse. “What was it? Staff sergeant – Hmm. Devlon? No, that wasn’t it.” She took out two boxes of pasta. “What do you think – lasagna or spaghetti Bolognese tonight?”
“Lasagna,” both boys answered.
Gabriel focused on his geometry lesson, positioning his protractor to calculate the degrees of various angles.
“A handsome young man, friendly and courteous,” Lillian continued, as she put away the rest of the items. “Though awfully young-looking to be a staff sergeant. Oh, look at these olives! Mrs. Mancetti just got them in.” She took out a colander and began rinsing the vegetables. “What was his name. Damion? No.” Then she held up her finger. “Demain! That was it. Staff Sergeant Demain.”
“Sounds like French for tomorrow,” said Tommy.
Gabriel’s head snapped up – and he exploded out of his chair. “Tiny!” He ran to the window, shoved it open, and stuck his head out looking left and
right. In the distance he saw a man in uniform. “TINY!” he hollered. The figure spun around, took off his cap and waved it high. Gabriel flew out of the apartment, crying, “It’s Tiny!”
Tommy’s mouth dropped open. “Tiny Tomorrow?”
Lillian looked at Tommy with wide eyes. “Could it be?”
Tommy ran to the open window and leaned out. He saw Gabriel run up to the soldier. “I don’t believe it!”
Lillian also leaned out, clutching the carrots. “After all these years!”
“Tiny!” Gabriel cried, running up and almost knocking him over in a hug. “Tiny! Is it really you?” He leaned back to look at his old friend. “I can’t believe it!”
Tiny was now a good head taller than Gabriel and had filled out considerably. He laughed. “No one has called me Tiny since I left here.”
“No wonder – look at you! Army Air Forces!”
“I became a tail gunner, just like I said I would.”
“I didn’t think you’d be old enough to get in.”
“Well, that’s the thing, Gabriel.” Tiny pushed his cap back and tilted his head to one side, and for a moment, Gabriel caught a glimpse of the scrawny boy he had met in the park four years ago foraging for firewood. “The orphanage never knew the exact date of my birth.” He broke out into a smile. “So, I made one up that allowed me to enlist! One of the advantages of being an orphan.”
“Holy Toledo! You gotta come back and tell me everything! Jeez, I was afraid I’d never hear from you again.”
“I’d love to Gabriel. And I want to visit Father Dwyer. I stopped by but he wasn’t there. I left a note for him saying I’d be back. And I want to see Mrs. Mancetti.” He glanced at his military watch. “But I have to catch a train. To Wisconsin,” he added with a wide smile, just begging to be explained.
“Wisconsin? Who the heck lives there?”
“My wife,” Tiny said with a proud grin. “Molly.”
“Your wife? You’re married?” Gabriel smacked his head in disbelief.
Tiny nodded. “I met Molly outside of the airbase. She was a WASP – she can fly! I’m going to meet her family in Wisconsin for Christmas. Then we’re coming back to visit. I want you to meet her.”
Christmastime 1945 Page 16
