by Jane Josephs
“Want to go down?”
Alison snapped out of her musings and turned to Nick. Their eyes met and held. Did he know how beautiful he was, with the starlight lighting his face? How desirable? She wanted to touch him. Soothe away the hurt she sensed in him. Know what—or who— had caused it.
Nick turned to go, and Alison barely caught herself from groaning. He led her down the stairs and out onto a wide expanse of rock. Below, to both left and right, the ocean had carved out inlets full of turbulent water.
They walked out to within a few feet of the drop-off into the ocean. Beside her, Nick stuffed his hands in the front pocket of his sweatshirt. “You haven’t been in San Diego very long, right?”
“About a year. I was born and raised in L.A. though, so I love everything about the ocean.”
Nick nodded. “You’ve seen your share of cliffs, too, I imagine. But Sunset Cliffs Natural Park is just a little further down the shoreline from here. And it’s worth a trip.”
“You think so?” When he nodded, she smiled. “I’ll put it on my list then.” Below her the water shot up, the sea spray almost at eye level. Alison stepped forward, feeling the touch of the mist. She stretched out her arms, threw back her head, and tasted a hint of the salty sea. The night air caressed her face and she delighted in it, feeling the freedom of it. The sweet, solid presence of Nick beside and behind her stirred her deep within. Finally, she dropped her arms and turned to him, a smile teasing her lips. “This is a special place for you, isn’t it?”
“I used to live with Tony and Joe. We came down here a lot, that’s all.”
Alison cocked her head, studying Nick’s closed body language. What would it take to get him to give up his secrets? She sensed he wouldn’t welcome her inquisitiveness. Not tonight at least. But he might agree to sit for a while on one of the rocks leading down to the ocean. “Yeah, this would be a fun party spot in the summer, especially with all you Special Forces guys around.”
Smiling at the combination of humility and charm Nick exuded, Alison spun back toward the ocean. Over her shoulder, she said, “Don’t laugh at me, but a few minutes ago, with my arms out wide, the wind against my face and the smell of the sea filling the air, I felt like the lead in a love story.” She sniffed and turned, her eyes glistening with unshed tears. “Minus the hero, of course. But, we can’t have everything, can we? I’m going to sit on those rocks over there for a while. Want to join me?” Without waiting, she walked back the way they’d come and jumped onto a flat rock.
~ ~ ~
Nick’s pulse leaped in his throat at the sight of her unshed tears. If she had touched his finger to a live wire, the charge that went through him couldn’t have been more electrifying. And deeply arousing. He wanted to give her what she craved. Connection. Belonging. Love. An alarm sounded in his head. “We should go,” he choked out, and turned toward the steps.
She turned, her hand outstretched in invitation. It rattled him. He didn’t want to feel the things he was feeling. Didn’t want to be attracted to her.
“Don’t go. Please. Can’t we just sit for a while and enjoy this amazing place? I promise I won’t tease you anymore.” She cocked her head. “Please.”
How could he say no? He didn’t want to. Her dark, luminous eyes softened, and she licked her lips. The alarm bells in his head shrieked. Like a snake in a snake-charmer’s basket, he was dancing to her pipe, lured by her tune. He had to get away.
“Let me get a blanket out of the truck for you to sit on.” Without waiting for her response, he took the steps two at a time, his heart pounding. He might sit on a rock with her for a little while, but after that, Alison Dockerty needed to move on and find another guy to make crazy. He didn’t have time for a woman in his life.
Or the guts.
In minutes, he returned, shook out the blanket, and draped it over her shoulders. Instead of sitting, he turned, climbed down to the patch of sand by the water and pulled the hood of his sweatshirt over his head, shutting her out. But his thoughts wouldn’t be shut out so easily. How many times had he been here with the woman he thought he’d spend his life with? The woman who had betrayed him when he couldn’t do anything to stop her.
His phone rang. Nick breathed a sigh of relief. The rest of the team had arrived. He turned and climbed back to where Alison sat huddled on the rock.
“Are you cold? I can share the blanket.” Alison held it out in invitation.
“No time now.” Nick offered her his hand. “The gang’s here finally. I don’t know about you, but I’m hungry.”
His hand swallowed hers. The sensation of her velvet soft skin against his callouses as he helped her to her feet nearly undid him. She stumbled on the uneven surface of the rock and he steadied her.
“You okay?” He let go of her hand but didn’t step away.
Her voice barely a whisper, she said, “Yeah. Thanks. And thanks for showing me this place, and . . .” Her gaze dropped to his lips.
“Hey, Nick!” From up above, Dustin and Ashley called and waved.
Nick stepped away quickly and turned. Without a word, he strode to the stairs.
Alison sighed and gathered the blanket around herself. “Good thing I know how to handle rejection,” she muttered under her breath and followed Nick.
At the top, Nick walked ahead with Dustin, leaving her with Ashley.
“The cliffs are beautiful, aren’t they?” Ashley said as they walked down the street toward Tony’s. “And the ocean, at this time of night especially. So romantic.” Her eyes sparkled. “This place is really special for Dustin and me, for a lot of reasons, but mainly because we were baptized down in that inlet with all our friends watching. We had to wear wet suits it was so cold, but it was the most wonderful day of my life.”
Alison’s gut tightened. “That’s, uh, great. Ah, congratulations.”
Thankful they had arrived at Tony’s driveway, Alison searched for a new subject. “How lucky is Tony to have a place like this so close to the beach!?” Her gaze swept over the small house. A porch divided the pastel painted bungalow in two sections, with metal awnings over the windows on either side.
“Totally lucky. His grandparents deeded it to him a few years ago when he became a SWCC. He’s their only grandson, and this place is perfect for him. He rents out a room to Joe since it’s got three bedrooms. Nick used to live here, too, but he moved back home to be with his mom and brother after his dad died last year.”
Alison stopped walking at the news. Ashley turned.
“Oh. I didn’t know about his dad,” Alison said, shaking her head. The compassion Nick had shown her as they talked about her grandma on the ship made perfect sense now. He was grieving too. They resumed walking, and Ashley went on with her story.
“Joe and Tony, of course, quickly filled the third bedroom with their SWCC gear. So, if more than one person wants to stay over, they toss a coin for who gets the sofa. The loser gets the floor. And it’s hardwood.”
Alison climbed the three steps to the porch with Ashley. A coach light illuminated the screen door. She could see immediately what Ashley meant about the sofa and hardwood when she opened the door. The front part of the house was about the size of her walk-in closet, with a leather sofa, a fish tank, a bookcase, and a coffee table. But behind the sofa, a wall had been knocked down, exposing the kitchen and giving the house an open floor plan. Beyond the kitchen and the dining area, another sofa and a recliner faced a flat screen TV. A wall of windows opened to the backyard where people had gathered.
“Is there a bathroom I can use?” Alison asked Ashley. Nick had disappeared so fast she didn’t have a chance to ask him for her backpack, but a quick glance told her no one had changed their clothes, so she really didn’t need it.
“Oh, sure, it’s right at the end of this hall.” Ashley led her to the left of the front
room and pointed down a hallway.
“I see it. Perfect. I’ll join you in a minute.” Tossing Nick’s blanket on the sofa, Alison walked past a closed door to get to the bathroom. Off to the right, the hall turned. Two more doors were closed, obviously the second and third bedrooms. Alison went into the bathroom and closed the door, anxious to get to the party.
When she had done what she could to restore her hair, she rinsed her hands and left the bathroom.
Small though it was, the backyard was meant for a party, with a large expanse of cement patio, a couple of round tables, and a pre-fab outdoor kitchen unit that had a counter top, a space for the grill, and a mini-fridge. Standing next to the grill, Tony punched the air with a pair of tongs as he talked to CJ and Spitz. Several of the women had gathered around one of the tables. Alison wandered over to a wheelbarrow filled with ice, water, soft drinks, and beer, helped herself to Nick’s favorite—a Goose Island IPA, and made her way to their table.
“Is it okay if I join you?”
“Sure,” Katie said, shifting Timmy. “Help yourself to some veggies, too.” She scooted the platter of vegetables toward Alison and gestured to the woman sitting to her right. “And this is Lauren, Spitz’ wife, and their daughter, Cassidy.”
Lauren had straight, platinum blonde hair that spilled over her shoulders, green eyes enhanced with a heavy layer of mascara, and lips liberally smeared with shiny lip-gloss. The baby turned in her arms to stare at Alison. A huge silk flower attached to an elastic headband had been placed around her head of curly hair.
“She’s adorable,” Alison said, glancing from Cassidy to Timmy. “How nice that these two are so close in age. They’ll be great playmates.”
“If they don’t fight all the time,” Lauren said with a laugh. “My brother has two that fight a lot, so I guess I’m already preparing for it.”
A cowbell sounded and Alison jumped.
“Salmon’s ready!” Tony bellowed, effectively interrupted any other conversation.
Everyone started to form a circle and began taking hands with each other. Alison glanced at Kayla, not sure what to do.
“Come on, Alison,” Kayla said, taking Alison’s hand. “Grab Katie’s hand so we can pray.”
Panicked at the thought that she would have to say something to a god she didn’t believe in and didn’t know anything about, she started to make an excuse to go inside. But in the next instant, Katie grabbed her hand and Nick spoke up, thanking God for friends and sports and good beer and salmon. Everyone said a rousing “Amen” and queued up for their share of fish.
Disconcerted, Alison swallowed hard and got in line. Of all the CrossFit boxes she could have joined, how had she landed in one full of Christians?
For the first time in a long while, Alison wondered, Could there really be a God?
Chapter 4
Nick studied Tony as he dealt the last hand of poker for the evening. His fellow SWCC instructor was no longer in a good mood and didn’t care who knew it. The stacks of chips in front of Nick were part of the reason for Tony’s downcast, angry face. Kayla’s early departure because of a migraine headache, Nick figured, could be blamed for the rest.
Tony finished dealing and put down the deck. Nick lifted his cards, schooling his face to show nothing of the excitement rolling in his gut at the sight of two kings. A good start. Now, he just had to hope Joe and Tony didn’t hold anything that could beat him. But knowing his two friends, even if they had nothing worth betting on, they would make him sweat before they’d give up.
“Give me two,” Nick said, trading a three and an eight for two new cards. Tony dealt him a two of diamonds and a ten of clubs, a beautiful match for the ten of hearts he’d chosen to keep with the kings. Nick grimaced, hoping his friends would take it for disappointment.
Joe traded for three new cards, not a good sign unless he also held a pair in his hand. Of all the guys, Joe always had the hardest time bluffing the others. His face gave him away every time, and tonight was no exception. Nick breathed a sigh of relief when Joe’s mouth drooped.
“I’m out,” Joe said, tossing down his cards and pushing back his chair. “You two can figure out how to split the cash. My chips aren’t worth more than a dollar.” He walked out to the yard, grabbed a beer from the wheelbarrow, opened it and chugged half.
“How about you?” Nick asked Tony. “Got anything?”
Tony stared at him, his blue eyes full of anger. “No,” he spat and spiked his cards on the table. “You win. Again.” He got up. “I need to talk to you on the patio.” Tony stalked around the table and joined Joe in having a beer.
Adding his cards to the deck, Nick got up, found the chip caddy and put the chips away. The winning pot of money sat on the kitchen counter, but he ignored it. Beyond, in the living room on the sofa, Olivia and Alison were talking, their faces creased with smiles.
Nick clenched his jaw. Joe and Tony weren’t in any shape to take Alison or Olivia home. That left him. Anger clawed at his gut at being taken advantage of by his friends. Or was it fear? He walked out to the patio. Joe and Tony stopped talking.
“What’s up?” Nick said. “Why’d you want to talk to me? As if I didn’t know.” He huffed out an angry grunt, turning his full wrath on Tony. “How many times do I have to tell you and Kayla to quit with the matchmaking. When I want a woman, I’ll get one.”
Tony’s furtive glance toward the house made Nick’s skin crawl. He jerked around, afraid he’d find Alison right behind him. He breathed a calming breath when she wasn’t. Still, he lowered his voice. “First, you throw us together to get here. Now you’ve set me up to take her home, haven’t you?”
Joe stepped next to Nick. “I had nothing to do with it, Nick. Honest. But I’m sorry. Alison’s a fun girl, and I’d take her home, but I’ve already had four beers, and I guess since I knew Olivia’s staying here tonight, I haven’t been paying attention to how much I’ve had to drink.” He gestured toward the house. “She’s going to Chicago tomorrow and I have to drive her to the airport at 4:30 for the first flight out, so she’s sleeping in your old room.”
“It’s okay, Joe. I’m not mad at you.” Nick sighed and turned to Tony. Joe moved past Nick and walked toward the house. “You either, Tony, really. I know you’re just trying to help me get on with life. Kayla, too. But you have to let me . . .” He shook his head and glanced in to the house. Joe had reached the women. “Come on. Let’s tell Alison she’s stuck with me for a ride home.”
Nick turned to go, but Tony stopped him. “I’m sorry, Nick. Kayla is, too. She texted me on the way home to say she forgot about arranging a ride for Alison. You’ve got to know we care about you, man, that’s all. Kayla really likes Alison, too, and she’s trying to be her friend. That’s all today was about, really. Will you forgive me? Please?”
“This time,” Nick grunted. “Yeah.”
“What about Jesus’ command to forgive seventy times seven?”
“You’re close to it, Tony, believe me.”
In the living room, Joe lamented his lousy luck at poker and blamed Nick in a loud voice for his losses, trying his best to win sympathy. Olivia patted his cheek while Alison ducked her head to hide her smile.
“Alison,” Nick said, coming to stand beside Joe. “I’m your ride home. If you’re ready.”
Alison lifted her phone. “I was just about to call Uber. I don’t want to trouble you. I’m sure you want to get home.” She lifted her phone again. “I use them all the time.”
Nick hesitated, caught between wanting to take the out she was offering, and being offended by it. Did she prefer Uber to riding with him? It didn’t matter. He wanted to take her home. “Alison,” Nick repeated, cocking his head and piercing her with eyes full of mock sternness. “I’m your ride home. I’ve got your backpack, and if you want it, you’ll have to come with me.”
“Well.” Alison cleared her throat and met his gaze with a cocky grin and mischievous eyes of her own. “Yes, sir. If you put it that way, I accept your kind offer. I wouldn’t want to lose my iPad and risk you learning all my secrets.” She turned to Tony. “Thank you so much for a fun evening and the wonderful food. You have really nice friends.” She smiled at Olivia, then looked back at Tony. “Please tell Kayla I hope she feels better.” Grabbing Nick’s blanket from the sofa, she walked to the door.
~ ~ ~
Nick started the truck and fastened his seatbelt. “Sorry I forgot about getting your backpack for you before the party.” He made a U-turn and headed toward the city.
“I didn’t really need it, except I could have used my brush. But no one seemed to mind my snarls and tangles. I packed some other clothes, but it turned out I didn’t need to change.”
Nick glanced at her hair, cascading around her shoulders. To take his mind off wondering how it would feel in his hands, he asked, “So, why’d you choose to live downtown when you moved to San Diego?”
“That’s easy. The condo where I live. It’s the place where my grandma Kate and I always made happy memories together. It belonged to her. She bought it years ago when the building was just a plan on the drawing board and deeded it to me in her will along with some other things. It’s the place where I feel closest to her. She loved the vibe of the city. So do I, although I love the mountains too. But in the city, there’s always something to do. What about you? Ashley said you live with your mom.”
“And my brother. We have a small ranch out in Ramona.” Although he had good reasons for living at home, it still made him self-conscious to admit he lived with his mother at his age. He turned the corner onto Alison’s street, relieved when she didn’t ask more questions.
