'Peggy!' I cried, sinking to my knees and burying my face in her coat as hot tears welled in my eyes. There I sat for a long while, listening to the soft thud of her heartbeat as Eliza looked on with pity in her eyes.
'They died believing I was dead,' I said at last, raising my face from the warm comfort of Peggy's fur. My fist clenched the stems of the snowdrops, and my voice cracked with emotion. 'I should have come back to save them. Nicholas Treadway warned me.'
'How so?' asked Eliza.
'He told me to go back. He told me to beware Emerson. He was speaking of my family! I knew it in my heart, but when the Shade attacked me in the mirror I saw my own corpse and thought I was to die. But I wasn't dead, just unconscious. It was warning me of Devere's attack, not my death! I should have trusted my instincts. I should have turned aside and protected my family.'
'You couldn't possibly have known what was meant,' said Eliza. 'Such warnings only become clear after the events have come to pass.'
A sudden gust whipped up a pile of dead leaves where they lay beneath the chestnut’s branches and sent them sailing around the little crosses. Eliza shivered, but I remained kneeling upon the frozen ground unmoved.
'I trusted Emerson,' I whispered. My voice was hoarse and fraught with hurt and anger. ‘He saved my life in making me his apprentice. I never wanted to believe he was part of Devere’s plan.’
'I don't believe he was- not intentionally,' replied Eliza. 'He trusted Devere unquestioningly and couldn't see that his trust was mis-placed.'
I said nothing and turned away as my hand moved to my face and brushed across my eyes. I stared silently at the graves for several minutes as Eliza stood and looked on helplessly.
'Will you give me a moment alone?' I said.
She nodded. 'I'll wait with the horses.'
I watched her disappear out of view then reached into my pocket and pulled out the telescope that Edward had given me months before. It had lain hidden in my pocket, unused and half-forgotten until now. Now I thought of the last time I had seen my mother and father and Lizzie and how easily I could recall their faces and voices. I imagined their grief upon learning I was dead and the terror they must have felt in their final moments. I hoped their end had been swift, but a nagging uncertainty gripped me. With trembling hands, I lifted the telescope to my right eye and thought of their last moments. My body tensed, and my pulse quickened as a vision of their bodies flashed through my mind, as vivid and real as a memory. My mother lay slumped in a pool of blood at the foot of the stairs, a gaping bullet wound in her back where she had been shot as she fled. Lizzie lay beside her, cradled in her arms. My father's body lay on the kitchen floor, riddled with wounds, his hands still clutching the knife he had tried vainly to fight off the mysterious assailant with.
I felt my grief surge within me, and I tore the telescope away from my eyes. In my mind, the voice of the Prince echoed suddenly as he read Ambrose’s words; from the blood of the father, hope springs. Had Ambrose meant for me to hear those words? I couldn’t be sure, but they resonated now with fresh meaning as I thought of my own father.
I stuffed the telescope back into my pocket and stood up. Behind me, the sun was beginning to set. Dusk was gathering, and the forms of the trees and headstones in the once-familiar churchyard now appeared shadowy and obscure. The wind had picked up, and the heads of the snowdrops nodded gently in the breeze. I looked once more upon the four crosses. The pale inner layers of the newly-planed wood seemed to glow in the failing light.
'Farewell,' I murmured before turning away and crossing the churchyard with Peggy at my heels. I did not look back. In the lane beyond, Eliza waited with the horses. Their breath steamed and hung in the bitter air, and Ruby’s head was inclined towards Ralph’s; two weary travellers huddled together at the day’s end.
Eliza looked up as I approached. Her eyes were misty with tears. 'You don't have to go back to London,' she said heavily. 'George has granted you a dispensation. You're released from the Guild. You are free to go back to your old life- if that is what you want.'
I shook my head. 'It is long gone. Magic has ruled my life from the moment I was born. My family were killed because of it. I cannot escape it, but I can learn to master it. I will return to the Guild.’
Eliza smiled, and the tears flowed freely from her eyes. She flung her arms around me and held me for several moments. ‘I’m glad,’ she said at last. ‘It would be a lonely place without you now.’
I looked back up the lane the way we had come not half an hour before and nodded. 'I told Edward I had seen enough of the wicked things that magic can do, and I should like to do some good with it. I never thought I would get the chance to, but perhaps this is it.’
Eliza smiled. 'Perhaps, dear Tom. I surely hope it is.'
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A Skin of a Dragon (The Guild of Gatekeepers Book 1) Page 27
