Even though she’d been flirting with him for days, she hadn’t intended to kiss him, and she damn well hadn’t thought that if she did, she would like it this much. She wanted nothing more than to drag him back to her ship, tear off all his clothing, and—
A text alert came into her chip and flashed up on her contact display. A message from her brother with the headline: Prince Jorg just arrived at the palace.
14
Tristan didn’t say a word as he followed Nalini off the barge and onto the mainland where she attended numerous meetings. He did his best to stay alert, focus on his duty, and not think about the kiss. The kiss that she’d thankfully stopped before it had led to the thoughts flashing through his mind, of pulling her behind the crates stacked on that barge and having wild passionate sex with her.
Thankfully.
Oh, he hadn’t been thankful in that moment. Even if she’d initiated the kiss, he—and all of his jubilant hormones—had been eager to go along with it and see where it might lead.
But now, as his body had time to cool and rational thought returned, he could nod firmly and be thankful they hadn’t crossed a line into something he would never be able to explain to his superiors. Or to Prince Jorg.
The problem was that he couldn’t regret the kiss. He wanted to do his duty and become a real knight, but he was falling in love with this forbidden woman. Damn it.
It was well after dark when Nalini finished her last meeting and returned to the combat shuttle they’d taken from the mining ship.
As far as Tristan knew, nobody had questioned her about the ownership—perhaps Prince Dubashi, presumably the rightful owner, hadn’t wanted to report it missing, since everything else would also come out. Tristan wasn’t sure how the law worked in this system, since there were dozens of individual governments on the planets, moons, and space habitats, not counting the two mining families that controlled the belts. The Kingdom, which ruled over all of his home system, was simpler to understand.
Once he and Nalini stepped into the shuttle and closed the hatch, alone for the first time that day, she faced him. Tristan braced himself, knowing he should lift his hands and refuse a kiss if she offered one, but also not sure that he would.
Nalini kept her distance and took a deep breath. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have kissed you. I know you don’t feel it would be right for us to have a relationship when I’m supposed to marry another man. Even if I haven’t met him yet.” She smiled, but it seemed laced with frustration. “It wasn’t right of me when you’ve made it clear that we should maintain a professional distance. Even if I thought it was an excellent kiss and if you carried me off to my bedroom right now, I’d make sure we had the most memorable night of your life.”
Heat rushed to his face—and other places. She didn’t even have to touch him to get him excited.
In order to avoid thinking about how she might accomplish such a memorable night, he looked at the single cabin of the small shuttle. “Your bedroom? I wasn’t aware that there were bedrooms in our escape craft.”
She followed his gaze. “I believe the seats in that back row recline.”
“Intriguing, but…”
“I know, I know. Professional distance. Even if…” Her smile turned sad as she looked back at him. “I’m not doing a good job of apologizing, am I?”
“There have been a lot of even ifs in it.”
“Yeah.” The smile grew lopsided. “I was just… It meant a lot that you didn’t judge me for not being a consummate capitalist. I guess it makes sense that you wouldn’t since you don’t seem to care about money.”
“You’ve probably figured out that I was one of those low-income people you’re helping.” And he would be again if Jager refused to make his placement in the knights permanent. With his combat training, he supposed he could qualify for a security job somewhere, so he wouldn’t necessarily be on the street, but Jager could also ruin his life and ensure he never worked again, especially in the Kingdom. Would he? Tristan didn’t know. He didn’t think Jager was typically that spiteful—Jorg might be—but if he ruined the prince’s marriage plans by giving Nalini a reason to call it off, Jager might be more bitter than usual. “We got kicked out of our apartment more than once because my mom couldn’t afford the rent,” Tristan added.
Nalini stepped forward and hugged him. He was afraid even that would lead to something that would get him in trouble, but when she pressed her face against his shoulder, he couldn’t keep himself from returning the hug. And noticing that her hair smelled like the lilac blossoms that bloomed in the spring in the parks in the capital. He wished he could take Nalini there and show her the neighborhood where he’d grown up, not because it was lovely but because she would see it as an appealing challenge and want to make it lovely.
Eventually, Nalini stepped back. Tristan resisted the urge to tighten his grip and keep her close. He dropped his hands to his sides.
“We better get back to the palace.” Nalini studied the deck. “I got a note from my brother. Prince Jorg arrived early for the ball.”
“Ah.”
Tristan wondered if that note had come in while they’d been kissing. It might explain why she’d broken it off when she’d seemed to be enjoying it so much. When he’d been enjoying it so much.
“I don’t want to marry him,” Nalini continued, “as I’m sure you’ve guessed, but my father has made it clear that there are threats out there to our people—Prince Dubashi, for starters—and that an alliance with the Kingdom would be useful to us.”
“You don’t have to explain anything to me, Your Highness—Nalini. I’m just your—” Bodyguard, he’d been about to say, but she looked up and shook her head, making him pause.
“A noble man deserving of much happiness.”
“Thank you for that.” It meant a lot, especially since she believed—or should still believe—that he’d been kicked out of the knights for mendacity.
“And I would be tempted to run off with you if not for the needs of my father and those he governs.”
Tristan’s throat grew tight with emotion. He inclined his head in a bow, not trusting his voice.
She touched his arm, then turned and headed toward navigation to pilot them back to her home, where she would marry a man she had never met and might never love. For the sake of an alliance. The universe wasn’t fair.
She patted one of the back seats on the way by, then offered an impish grin over her shoulder. “And just in case you weren’t sure, I’d happily turn off the interior cameras and spend the entire trip back locked in a passionate embrace with you. No one would ever need to know.”
Since she continued on to navigation, he was positive she didn’t believe he would consider it. Alas, she was right. His honor wouldn’t allow it.
The universe definitely wasn’t fair.
* * *
Nalini watched the familiar lumpy asteroid draw closer on the combat shuttle’s forward display, the asteroid that contained her father’s palace, and the only home she’d known in her twenty-five years.
They had an escort now—four of her father’s cruisers—and had for the entire return trip. Their captains, after traveling all the way to Oceanus to protect her, had been apoplectic when she’d insisted on flying the combat shuttle back home instead of riding with them. She’d explained that she wanted Dubashi’s shuttle as proof that he’d sent men after her. The captains had offered to have one of their own pilots fly it back so she could ride in the luxury she was due on one of their larger vessels. She’d resisted, in part because she wanted to return home like a victorious general with a battle prize, but mostly so she could spend a few more days alone with Tristan before being introduced to the man she would marry.
And before having to tell her father that Tristan should be reassigned to someone else.
She was falling in love with him, and she knew it. Even if his honor would keep them from ever acting on their feelings, it wouldn’t be fair to him to keep him as a bodyguard
once she was with Jorg. She could too easily imagine them spending the rest of their lives sharing longing gazes and wondering what could have been if she hadn’t been her father’s daughter and bound to do what was best for their people.
The need for separation was unfortunate for more reasons than one. They’d continued his financial education on the way back, and he was better at numbers than most androids she’d worked with. He also had a great memory—no doubt from a lifetime of practice having to remember what he heard, since he couldn’t easily look up information on the network. She could envision him in the role of business partner, traveling around the system with her to find new projects and make deals.
But that wouldn’t be any better as far as longing gazes went. No, it would be best for them both if they didn’t see each other again.
Maybe Jorg would surprise her and be interested in real-estate development.
“Tristan?” Nalini looked over the back of her pod to find him exercising in the open area behind the troop seats. He’d recovered from his injuries but seemed to worry that he’d lost his fitness by being forced to rest for a few days—that hardly seemed likely—and had been training hard on the return trip.
He popped to his feet. “Yes, Your Highness?”
“You can call me Nalini, remember. At least when we’re alone.”
“I’m afraid I would forget and do it when it wouldn’t be appropriate.” He clasped his hands behind his back.
“Ah.” She supposed she should be glad that he was mature and wise and wasn’t tempting her away from what she knew was right.
She guided the shuttle into the mouth drilled in the asteroid and the long passageway that led back to the palace.
“Did you only call me up to reiterate name preferences?” Tristan smiled gently.
No, she’d wanted to ask him again, now that they knew and trusted each other, for information on the man she was about to meet. Before, he’d said he barely knew Prince Jorg and couldn’t comment on what he was like, but she’d sensed that he’d been holding something back. She wished she could get his honest opinion now, because Jorg might put on a different face for her, at least at first, than he would have for servants and employees. She wanted to truly know what kind of man she was going to marry.
But she chickened out and said the first thing that came to her mind that wasn’t that. “I thought you might want to not comment on the boot decorations I purchased back at the Northern Oceanus spaceport before we hopped onto the launch loop.”
She swiveled in her pod to show him the purple and lavender tassels that she’d attached to her boots for their homecoming. The ends lit up when she shook her feet. They weren’t quite as satisfying as purchasing all new shoes, but they did match her purple-nebula galaxy suit.
“I see.” Tristan studied them. “I am not commenting on how… perky they are right now.”
“That’s kind of you.”
“Yes.” He smiled again and rested a hand on her shoulder.
He looked like he wanted to say more, but they had reached the palace, and the bay doors were opening. As Nalini guided the shuttle through them, a winged dark-purple spaceship that she didn’t recognize came into view. It took up more than half of the bay that usually housed twenty smaller ships.
Tristan dropped his hand, all expression washing off his face. Nalini remembered that Kingdom royalty favored that rich dark purple. This was Jorg’s ship. It had to have room for two hundred people, but it was a transport ship and couldn’t have needed a crew of more than ten or twelve. Had he traveled with that many servants to tend to his needs?
She told herself not to prejudge him, but she also hoped she wouldn’t have to deal with him until the next day. Even though the trip back from Oceanus hadn’t been arduous—she would even consider it restful—she wanted time to speak with her brother and Devi—she hoped Devi was back in operational shape—and get the lay of the land. She also wanted a long soak in a hot bath. The combat shuttle’s amenities were decidedly basic.
“What’s he like?” Nalini finally asked as their craft settled onto the deck. She should have asked sooner.
Tristan hesitated, and she thought that he would withhold an answer, or choose something diplomatic again.
“I don’t like him,” he finally said, “but he’ll probably be different with you than with me.”
That was one of Nalini’s fears. She didn’t want to spend the rest of her life with someone who was an ass to the staff and only said the right things to those in power who could do something for him. In her experience, those people always tended to be jerks through and through, something that came out even with their families when they lost their tempers.
“You never told me,” Tristan said softly, his gaze toward the display, “what prompted you to start building portions of your properties for people of lesser income who couldn’t normally afford to live in such places.” His gaze shifted toward her. “You’ve done a lot of that. I’ve been researching your developments. If I could qualify, I could afford to live in one of your beachfront condos on Oceanus on my… bodyguard pay.”
Knight’s pay, he’d been about to say.
Whatever had happened in the past, he still held himself like one of those knights, was still as honorable as they were reputed to be. It occurred to her for the first time to doubt the story he’d given her father. She believed that he’d grown up as a commoner and worked hard toward the dream of becoming a knight, but had he truly wanted it so badly that he’d lied about his ancestry? And even if he had, wouldn’t they have easily figured it out? Something didn’t quite click, but he was gazing at her and saying he’d been looking into her work, and that made her want to forgive him for any transgressions in the past, any evasions he might have made when they first met.
“I was kidnapped when I was a kid,” Nalini said. “Not for political reasons that time. It was by a bunch of nomadic Star Striders who’d apparently heard my father was fonder of me than some of my siblings. They just wanted money. They swept me off to Rama Moon and had me for six weeks before my father’s people caught up with them. He’s not one to give in to ransom demands, but he had a dozen ships hunting for me. My captors weren’t cruel to me or even unkind. They were desperate, and I almost felt sorry for them. The leader told me about how, because they were gypsies and didn’t have references and employment records or steady jobs, they couldn’t get legitimate places to stay, even when they had the money. It gave me a chance to see a life I’d had no experience with before, one of poverty and constant fear of the future.”
She closed her eyes. She hadn’t thought of this event for some time, but the memories came back surprisingly clearly, the pervasive scents of mold and mildew in the underground tunnels of the moon colony, the gauntness of the people who lived there, how the gypsies laughed and sang songs to each other even though their lives were so hard.
“There was a girl my age who was sick with Mrtyu Fever, and she was one of the reasons the group was trying so hard to get some money. There was a treatment, but only for those who could afford it. The night before my father’s people found me, the girl—her name was Abhitha, I remember—died. They hadn’t been able to get money together for the treatment in time.”
Nalini gazed at the display, at the indicators letting them know the bay outside was being pressurized and that they could go out soon. “I almost wish my father had paid the ransom, even though I understand why he has the policy he does. Then Abhitha might have made it. But then I wouldn’t have spent that time there, long enough to see how different the rest of the universe is from the palace where I grew up. That made an impression on me. I didn’t have an aptitude or interest in the medical field, but I thought I could still find a way to help people like that, people who wanted a clean, safe place to live and raise their children. My father never understood charging someone less when others were willing to pay more. I stopped telling him about it. I just make sure the numbers work out well enough that he sees a positive
amount come into his account at the end of each month.”
“I understand that kind of desperation that prompts people to make unwise choices,” Tristan said quietly. “I’m glad you’re using your position to help them.”
Before Nalini could respond, a chime let her know that the docking procedure was complete. A second later, the interior doors of the bay opened, and a party strode into view. It included her father, her brother Samar, numerous bodyguards, and a man she recognized from his network photos as Prince Jorg.
So much for getting to bathe and relax before having to deal with him.
It wasn’t until she and Tristan were walking out of the shuttle alone that she realized their lack of a chaperone might cause Jorg concern. The Kingdom always seemed uptight and rigid when it came to sex and relationships, and more, Jorg might know who Tristan was and believe him a criminal. Which might technically be the case in the Kingdom, but Tristan was not a criminal here—he was a hero—so she wouldn’t allow him to be disparaged.
Jorg did frown as Nalini and Tristan approached their party, but it was hard to tell where it was directed. His chin was lifted, and the supercilious frown might have been a permanent fixture on his face.
As her father rushed forward to hug her, Nalini made herself smile at him—and also at her future husband. Nothing good would come from prejudging him.
“Nalini.” Her father wrapped his arms around her and kissed her on the cheek. “I’m terribly sorry for what you’ve endured. Never would I have guessed that Habib—my trusted sergeant, Habib!—would betray me so. And betray you. It is a shame on his family.”
“It’s all right, Father. I had Tristan, and he proved loyal and capable. You were wise to recruit him.”
Her father released her and nodded to Tristan, who barely noticed him or the rest of the party. He was eyeing Jorg warily, but Jorg was ignoring him.
Knight Protector: a Star Kingdom novel Page 15
