‘Give, Bella! Leave it.’ I sit on the floor in front of her, determined not to give in.
Bella tugs, also determined not to give in. And with each tug there’s a funny little growl or grunt as her feet slide on the wood floor.
‘Please?’ I’m not too proud to beg.
‘You’ll never win at that game, you need food!’
‘Shit!’ I’m so shocked at hearing a voice, I let go, fall flat on my back and Bella dives off, her nose in the air, proudly bearing off her trophy.
Luckily, she is caught before she heads off back into the garden with it.
I sit up.
Ash is standing in the open doorway and has swooped Bella off her feet and is holding her high in the air.
He’s framed by the large glass doors that lead onto the patio and show off the magnificent view of the lake.
Bella drops the flip flop, right in his face – serves him right.
‘Bloody hell, Bella, you’re a right ragamuffin!’ he chuckles, then glances at me. ‘There’ll be hell to pay if you let Georgina see her looking like this!’
I collapse back onto the floor. ‘Unfortunately, she has. She was not impressed.’
‘I bet.’
‘What do you want?’ He hugs Bella closer to him, not caring about the mud. They make a cute couple. ‘Apart from the obvious, of course.’ I scramble to my feet. ‘Give her back!’
He kisses the top of Bella’s head and reluctantly puts her down, so I can grab her collar. Then he hands me my flip flop.
‘It’s a bit awkward.’ He shifts uncomfortably. It’s odd, he doesn’t look the type who ever feels embarrassed. ‘I bumped into David, he said you’d done an amazing picture of Bella.’
‘David?’
‘Simons, he saw you by the stream? In the wood?’
‘Ah.’
‘If he says you’re good, then I know you are. It might sound daft, but I couldn’t, er, commission a painting of her, could I?’
‘Oh.’ This is not what I expected at all. ‘It was only a quick sketch, hang on.’ I drag a protesting Bella off to the kitchen, and lock her in, then go and get the picture I’ve done and hand it over. My knuckles brush against his and it’s almost a sensuous touch. An intimate touch that makes my insides clench with anticipation. Oh my God, that’s weird.
I jump back, embarrassed, my face heating up, and shove my hands in my pockets.
He hasn’t noticed. He’s staring at the sketch.
‘This is brilliant. You’re really talented.’ He looks up at me then, and I blush even more.
‘Don’t sound so bloody surprised!’
‘Sorry.’ He grins. ‘I didn’t mean it as an insult.’
‘I can do you one like that but finished, of course.’
‘I couldn’t have…?’ He waves the sketch.
‘Well…’
‘I’ll pay.’ The dimples deepen, but he’s looking at me earnestly. Then he glances back down, and his features soften. ‘She was bouncing about with the rest of the litter in the daisies when I first saw her, flopping about on the mown grass, and when she got up, she had a daisy in the middle of her head.’ He motions. ‘Daft apeth! It sealed the deal, how could I resist a noddle like that?’
Then he looks back at me, and his lips are pressed together in a rueful smile. ‘Sorry.’ He shrugs.
‘No need to apologise.’ I know my voice is stiff, it has to be, otherwise I might give in to the urge to well up or hug him, and that would never do. Oh. My. God. He really does love this dog. ‘She’s a cutie. Sure, have it if you want, but it’s not really finished.’
‘It’s perfect.’ He takes a couple of strides away, then stops. ‘I know a few really great viewpoints round here I could show you, that might be good for painting. You know, in return for this? If you fancy it, that is?’
‘You do mean walk, not another of your bootcamp sessions?’ I say, suddenly suspicious. If he thinks I’m up for an SAS-style clamber up mountains, then he’s got another think coming.
‘You don’t fancy a bit more training? We could throw in some light weights next time.’
‘Get lost!’
‘Bricks in the back of your rucksack, strengthen your core?’
I scowl, and this time he laughs properly.
‘I’m kidding! Honest! Though I reckon you would be up for it, given a bit of persuasion.’ Nope, not even when he grins his cute grin, puts his warm hand on my waist and looks me in the eye. No. Absolutely not. ‘This time though I do mean a walk with a view, a view of fells, lakes, wildlife.’ He is still grinning. Does he know how motivating I found the view of his bum when I was jogging after him across the lawn? ‘All good clean fun.’ He winks. He does. He must know. ‘Mind you, the view I had during our workout wasn’t too shabby.’
Now that is flirting. I’m sure it is. This man is dangerous. I should stay away.
Oh, why the hell should I? This is the new adventurous Becky. I am experimenting with my work, my fitness routine. Everything!
What happens in Cumbria stays in Cumbria!
And a stroll has to be better and easier than the workout, doesn’t it? And he is offering to show me places I might not discover on my own. Off the beaten track. ‘Wow, yes, sure, that would be great.’ I should say no, what about Georgina? Oh, bugger it, they’re not going out. I’m single, he’s single. ‘Brill. Lovely!’
‘I know a quiet spot where there are often young deer.’
Okay, that does it. I don’t need persuading. He doesn’t need to offer any extra incentive, although I’ll definitely have to take some photos if we are going to see some wildlife.
‘Thursday?’
‘Fab!’
He salutes me, then strides off across the lawn whistling, and occasionally glancing down.
I think I am grinning. I actually feel like punching the air and then hugging myself.
Oh, Ashley James, you are far too sweet and sexy for your own good. And mine. Wheedling your way into my heart and good books, and I’m not even supposed to talk to you, let alone like you!
I’m just too soppy. Show me a man cuddling a puppy or kitten and I’m putty in their hands. Except I can’t be. Georgina is my boss, and Georgina loves Bella just as much, I’m sure.
Bloody hell, this would be a lot easier if Ash was the good guy, and Georgina the evil ex I had to avoid!
I stare after him, then let my gaze take in the lake. The colours and the muted tones bring a lump to my throat.
Georgina is right. She could find somebody else to replace me. I could go home, avoid all this emotional hoo-ha, which I really could do without. Or I could just leave here with Bella and come back on weekends to check on the house. That way the dog would be happy, and I’d be avoiding all risks of Ash taking her or leading me astray.
Distance. That is what I need.
Except I don’t have a home to go back to, because I’ve got my own flat-sitter in. And I don’t want to go to my parents’ house, do I?
Oh my God, what am I doing even thinking like this? I want to be here. I don’t want to run away. I want to go off on an adventure with Ash, I want to have some fun, to challenge myself, to laugh.
The sound of something tearing snaps me out of my daydreaming and I rush to the kitchen.
Bella is chewing on something, pulling back and ripping, and I suddenly realise it’s my sock. Why didn’t I put it somewhere out of reach? Like the washing machine!
‘Oh Bella.’ I shake my head, so she shakes hers. Hard. As though she’s trying to kill the sock. I can’t help myself; I smile. She’s funny.
To be honest, even though she’s turning my life upside down, I’ve had more fun here in the last few days than I’ve had for months. I feel like I’m unpeeling the boring layers and getting back to the old me.
I look at her. Yep, it pays to be more dog. She’s all happy smiling face, wagging tail (that is putting streaks of mud along the cupboard like some random paintbrush), and – oops – muddy, muddy paws. The bit we
could do without.
Nope, no way could I go to my parents. Mum would have a hissy fit if I turned up with this little mud-seeking missile. She’d refuse to let her in the house until she’d been washed down and blow-dried.
And no way can I walk away from her. It’s like The Bodyguard: I am the Dog-guard protecting her from her obsessive stalker. Not that there are death threats for her – but there could be for me, from Georgina.
My phone bleeps and I realise I’ve got my fingers crossed. Please don’t be Georgina, please, right now I don’t think I can cope with any more drama.
It is not Georgina. It is an email from Ben. Marked urgent.
Oh my God, I’d forgotten all about him! A few days ago, I would have been refreshing my emails every twenty seconds waiting for him or another editor to get in touch, but I’ve forgotten all about obsessing about being shot down. I’ve been too busy with Bella, and Ash.
I reluctantly open the email. It’s just as I thought. The ‘tweaks’ have got Teddy’s stamp all over them. And so has the request for two more covers. Covers that do not make my heart soar, but rather make it sink with boredom.
‘I think I’ve had enough of this, don’t you Bella? Oh hell, don’t swallow the damned thing.’ She is gagging on my sock, but still growls possessively and tries to wrap her paws around it when I catch hold of the end. My God, she’s got a firm grip, and sharp claws! Flipping heck, choking my charge to death isn’t supposed to be on the agenda.
Then I remember what Ash said. Food! It’s a bit tricky hanging on to the toe of a sock, and dragging a dog across the tiles, but I’m determined not to let go as I head towards the fridge. Thank goodness for slippery tiled floors, she wouldn’t budge if there was a rug! Plus, bonus, her furry tummy is soaking up some of the dirt like a mop. Well, smearing it if I’m honest.
‘Oomph.’ I nearly bang my head on the door, as the second I open it, Bella lets go of her trophy. ‘Cheese or ham, madam?’ I don’t think she’s fussed.
My rat-like, bedraggled, holey sock goes in the bin. Then I look at my email again.
I have had enough of tailoring my life, and my work, to Teddy. Okay, it was a bit different when we were an item. I wanted to please him, I wanted to help him, and I was truly grateful that he wanted my career to flourish. But now I come to think about it, he wasn’t exactly supportive, was he? And it wasn’t really about my career. I was an extension to his.
And while I was flattered, I do know it can be hard to find decent cover designers – very few of us want to work in-house these days (and I was the closest on offer), we want the freedom of being freelance. House-sitting when (and where) the fancy takes us, haha.
But until now I’ve pushed my own preferences to one side, and desperately said ‘yes’ to everything Teddy has pushed my way.
I’ve got a horrible feeling he was the only one really benefiting from our relationship.
‘What do you think, Bella? Do I need to stop trying to please him, and everybody else?’ She licks my hand.
So I quickly type a polite but brief response to Ben, thanking him for the comments, giving him a date that I’ll get the changes back by, agreeing to provide one of the new covers and regretfully declining the other (which sounds dire and dismal) due to ‘other commitments’. Meeting him partway seems sensible – I’m not completely stupid, I don’t intend throwing a huge chunk of my income stream away without a second thought. If I’m going to establish my new career, then I need to do it gradually.
‘Got to keep us in crisps and cheese eh, Bella?’ She yawns and sits down, exhausted by all the fun.
Now all I’ve got to do is harden my heart against the man who wants custody of my charge. He obviously loves her, but sometimes love on its own isn’t enough, is it?
I have a work plan, now I need a dog-protection plan.
My natural inclination would be to go down the conciliation and negotiation route (you can tell I come from a family of solicitors, can’t you?), and give Ash supervised access, but I’m not sure Georgina’s going to buy that. She seems a bit inflexible where Ash is concerned. And upset. So, what do I do?
‘I think it’s wine o’clock, don’t you, pup?’ Bella yawns. ‘With Pringles and a Netflix binge?’
She follows me upstairs and watches from the bed as I pull on my comfiest baggiest T-shirt and joggers, then pads down after me waiting expectantly as I root in the giant fridge freezer.
‘Oh my God Bella, salted caramel ice-cream! What do you think, ditch the Pringles idea?’ My mouth is literally watering at the thought of it. So is Bella’s, she is drooling all over my bare feet. I grab the tub, then notice the smaller one behind it in the freezer. It makes me laugh. ‘I don’t believe it. She’s bought you doggy ice-cream!’ Bella wags her tail harder. ‘Spoon each?’ She spins around in a circle as I get one large and one small spoon from the drawer and two bowls, and she bounces around as I head into the lounge and grab the TV remote. ‘Bridget Jones is on! What do you think, Bella? Shall we watch Bridget?’
This feels so naughty as I sit on the floor, my back against the couch, Bella at my side.
Teddy wasn’t a fan of Bridget, or really any romcom. Or sitting on the floor.
I take the lid off the tub and grab a bowl and spoon, then stop dead.
‘You know what, Bella? I don’t need to do it that way.’ Teddy’s way. ‘I can ditch the bowl and be totally bad, what do you think?’ Teddy definitely wasn’t keen on eating ice-cream straight out of the tub. ‘But he isn’t here, is he? And it’s not his life – it’s mine!’ She wags her tail in approval. ‘And he’d have a fit if he saw me doing this!’ I dig deep into the tub with the big spoon, then do the same with the second, smaller tub, and hold out the small spoon for Bella and giggle as she licks, spreading it all over her nose and beard.
This is like escaping back to real life after being locked up for ages not being allowed to do anything that you really, really want to.
I can actually do whatever I like.
I laugh out loud and Bella jumps. ‘Sorry, pup.’ I fondle her furry ears and give her another spoon of ice-cream. ‘And that’s your last bit! You do know dogs can only have ice-cream as a special treat, don’t you? I’ll get you one of your healthy chews instead, how’s that?’ She gives me her sad eyes look. She is not impressed.
‘What the hell have I been doing the last few months?’ She doesn’t comment, she just lies down and rests her chin on my legs and gazes up adoringly. I know it’s the ice-cream she adores, not me, but it doesn’t matter. ‘You know what, you’re better than any therapist.’ She rolls over so I can tickle her hairy tummy. ‘Harder work, but better. Never a dull moment with you around, is there?’
I grin at the TV screen, then take another mouthful of ice-cream. This is where I need to be. Not just because of the amazing views and the gorgeous house.
This is about my life.
It’s one thing being considerate and fitting in with people, but it’s not good to try so hard to please another person that you end up losing who you really are. What you actually want.
I’m not crap. I’m not doing it all wrong. It’s time I tried to find that confident girl I used to be, the one that believed in herself. ‘If I don’t, nobody else is going to, are they Bella?’
Chapter Nine
‘I can’t just keep fending him off and running away, Abby.’
My sister rang me late last night, just as I was getting ready for bed.
Well, I say late. It wasn’t late in ‘city’ terms, but it was in my Lake District life.
I’ve taken to getting up earlier, so that I don’t miss the countryside waking up, and have the chance to capture the elusive quality of the light that disappears as the sun strengthens. The lake has a gentle shimmer on its surface, the mountains an almost nostalgic sepia colouring, and the dew magnifies and mirrors everything. It’s amazing. And anyway, there’s no point in staying up late – not even the bats do that around here.
Anyway, she caught
me brushing my teeth and so I settled into bed and we had a bit of a natter. She told me about how she was sure her boyfriend, Ed, was about to propose, how she hates her new office on the first floor because they’re all so competitive, and it’s further from the loos (apparently there are only gents’ toilets on that floor, as it used to be an old-fashioned firm and there was no demand for a ladies’), and how she’s been arguing with Ed about repainting the lounge because he likes on-trend grey and she thinks it will be depressing. I told her about the kingfisher, Bella, and my real-life version of the War of the Roses. And I asked her advice, because she knows all about family law and custody battles.
‘She’s probably in denial. I’m only guessing, but maybe she can’t accept their split because it wasn’t on her terms, so she can’t accept that he isn’t a total bad guy and maybe should see the dog? Or she could be right, that he’s telling you a load of bollocks and just wants to steal the dog back to piss her off!’
‘Gee, thanks a lot, sis. That’s helpful!’ Hmm, she has an interesting point though. Maybe it is something to do with accepting that her perfect life isn’t quite so perfect after all. I don’t know Georgina very well, but I’m already getting the impression that she’s used to everything going well, and right now it doesn’t seem to be.
‘Well I don’t know them, Bec!’
I need to try another tack. ‘I know, pretend she’s our client.’ Abby is used to seeing things from her client’s point of view, she works best when she can relate to things – something to do with her logical brain. ‘Or maybe we need to look at it from both sides—’
‘Our? We? Since when was this my problem?’
I ignore her. If I carry on, she’ll get drawn in; she can’t help herself, she likes to interfere. ‘It could be the other way around, maybe she’s stopping him seeing Bella to piss him off.’
‘I don’t think that’s seeing it from her point of view,’ Abby says reasonably. She has a point. ‘And why would she do that anyway?’
The Dog Sitter: The new feel-good romantic comedy of 2021 from the bestselling author of The Wedding Date! Page 9
