And anyway, this wasn’t some romantic movie where the man comes in and sweeps the girl off her feet. No, this was a business arrangement. One that had nothing to do with him. I was going to do the sweeping in. Not some man.
“I should turn you over my knee,” he said, sitting in his chair.
“What?” I gasped.
“Don’t sound so shocked. And now you’re going to miss the sunset. Your loss.” Garrett grabbed a metal dome and pulled it from the table. There sat two dinners. It looked and smelled delicious. Chicken, if I had to guess, with a little sauce and cheese. Add spaghetti and it would be chicken parmesan. The smell hit me, and my stomach fluttered as if it was doing a happy dance for food.
He picked up one of the plates and set it in front of me. My mouth watered and stomach growled once again.
“Do you have a chef here?”
“Yep,” he answered, but did not elaborate. In the conversations we shared so far, one thing was clear—Garrett wasn’t about to elaborate on anything.
I cut into the meat and stuck it in my mouth. Flavors bounced off my tongue. This was no canned sauce because I tried them all. This was something fancy. Whoever the chef was needed a raise. I didn’t care what he was getting paid before, he needed more. Swallowing, I was eager for more. I took bite after bite thinking this meal didn’t need the noodles. The flavors were rich, and it was beyond filling.
The silence between us wasn’t uncomfortable, but I was raised that you tell people when you appreciate something. Therefore, I spoke. “He’s great. I hope you pay him well. This sauce is one of a kind amazing.”
Garrett chuckled. “Thanks. It’s my grandma’s recipe, and it’s the one thing I actually didn’t make from the meal.”
I blinked. I blinked again; what did he just tell me? He made this? There was no way he made this. “You? You made this?” At every turn this man was full of surprises. I couldn’t hide my surprise.
“Great, isn’t it?” He placed a forkful in his mouth and began to chew. The sight of it made something in me tremble, and I looked away, digging into the food.
We ate in silence for a while. It was beautiful listening to the waves crashing up against the shore. They’d go out and back, then repeat it hundreds of times. It was the one thing good in this scenario.
With my belly full and my head a little clearer, I decided to get some stuff off my mind. “We need to get a few things straight,” I said, wiping my lips with the cotton napkin.
His brow quirked. “Shoot.”
Shoot. He really just casually told me to go for it like we were old friends.
I wanted to laugh. Maybe if I could just shoot him and Mr. Beacon, then I could go home and forget all of this even happened. That would be nice.
“Ground rules, Garrett.”
He smirked, and I knew instantly he wasn’t a man for rules. He thought it was cute that I did, and that lit a fire under my ass. Screw him and what he thought. Bottom line—there would be boundaries.
“We sleep on opposite sides of the bed. When I’m in the bathroom, you never come in. When I am changing, you never step in whatever room I’m in doing the deed. You keep your hands to yourself. You do not hold my hand. You do not touch me in any way, shape, or form. You keep your distance from me at all times.”
Garrett’s eyes appeared to be smiling, but there was something working behind them I couldn’t put my finger on. It was this layer of the unknown that seemed to follow this man around everywhere he went, and it pissed me off because how was I supposed to read him?
“Is that all, kitten?”
My eyes narrowed. “And stop calling me kitten!”
He locked his eyes to mine. A fire danced in his gaze. “Kitten. This is how our time together is going to play out. There is no distance between us.” My mouth opened to fire back that there was, but he held a finger up to my lips. I should bite the damn thing off. “We will sleep side by side. We will enter the bathroom on each other whenever we want. Our hands will be on each other, and I’ll touch you a lot, kitten.”
My head shook. He was unreal. “So what? You’re supposed to play with me before sending me off to Mr. Beacon to be played with his way? What kind of shit show are you two running?”
This pissed me off, and while I didn’t want to know the answer, I also did. This arrangement wasn’t meant for anyone but Mr. Beacon and myself. I didn’t want to do anything with him, let alone one of his henchmen. Was this what he did? Take women who had no other choice and spread them around to his friends?
No. That wasn’t part of the deal, and no way in hell was I getting passed around like a hooker or a whore, even if part of this deal made me feel like a prostitute.
The longer he sat there not speaking the more infuriated I became. “That was not the deal with Mr. Beacon. My agreement was with Mr. Beacon and only Mr. Beacon.”
“Sometimes, kitten, things change. This is the new deal now.”
“I want to talk to him,” I demanded, wishing under other circumstances I was sitting on a beautiful beach with a gorgeous man who wanted me here with him because he cared about me. Since that was a damn daydream, I kept on task.
“Nope. I won’t allow it.”
This wasn’t right. “Then I’m going to call my parents.” I made a move to get up, but his words halted me.
“None of the phones work and as you can see, there’s no one around for miles.”
“So you’re trapping me here, going to force me to have sex with you, and there’s nothing I can do about it.”
He didn’t hesitate with his reply. “I’d never force a woman to have sex with me.”
The breath I didn’t know I was holding escaped, and some of the weight on my shoulders lifted. Yeah. That was at least one good thing. If I could trust it. “Good. Then that part will never happen.”
He smirked. “Go ahead and think that.”
My head shook. “Is this what you meant by breaking me? Having sex with me to get me ready for Mr. Beacon?”
“No. I’m not the appetizer for the main course.” He rose from his seat. “Stay here. I’m going to get dessert.”
I wanted to get up and start running just to see where I’d end up. Maybe it would be far enough for this to all be a nightmare that I woke up from. Inside, I wanted to cry. Outside, I was stone cold. That was the way of the world.
Screw this. He wanted me to wait here, then I was going to go. Since I didn’t know a lot of places, the bedroom would be my escape. Hopefully it had a lock, or I’d be spending more time in the bathroom.
He wanted me to be this meek little woman who did everything she was told. No. That was not me. This mess I was in was just an obstacle. One I’d pass any way I could.
On that, I got up and made a dash to the house, just catching a glimpse of the sun setting over the horizon.
He was right—it was beautiful.
6
Garrett
For dessert, Ellen Sue had made a cheesecake from scratch before she departed and froze it. Knowing tonight would be a long one, I had taken it out to thaw before carrying the chicken out. Always be prepared, I had a plan for everything. This would balance the chicken perfectly.
Pulling out the chocolate sauce and caramel, I quickly heated them and drizzled it over the cheesecake before plating two pieces and planning to carry them out to the terrace.
Could I certainly put Enissa’s mind at ease?
Absolutely.
Was I going to?
Not a chance.
I knew the ins and outs of the deal with Beacon. More than that, I knew my intentions with her. In a few statements, I could actually take away all of her trepidation. Only a little bit of fear, anticipation, and confusion was good for the spirit. Even if she would never agree with me, I knew all of those emotions well. They made me the man I was today. That man was calculated.
I knew everything about her.
Like her favorite dessert was caramel drizzled cheesecake.
The sun
had set, and the solar lights around the area clicked on. Before I made it out of the kitchen, I heard the noise of a door on the other side of the house opening and closing. On a sigh, I headed out to the terrace as I planned.
Enissa wasn’t there.
This didn’t come as a surprise to me. Part of me anticipated her departure. The other part of me hoped she would take a chance on spending more time with me. She chose to leave. I understood it. Therefore, I allowed her this play.
Setting the plates down, I took my seat and sipped some wine before indulging in the dessert.
I was a patient man.
There was nowhere for her to run. If she thought my bedroom was a retreat, I’d allow her the false security for the moment. After all, I had locked the other bedroom doors so she could only access one area of the expansive home. All the other doors were simply going to tease her every time she tried and failed to open one.
Sitting back in the chair, I enjoyed the quiet sounds of the waves rolling in. Reaching in the pocket of my shorts, I pulled out my phone. Ignoring the multiple missed calls from Beacon, I found the contact I was seeking and made the call.
“Lo,” Onyx answered on the third ring.
“Just checking in.”
He laughed. “I’m not your father. No check-in necessary, Garrett. You’ve managed to be gone forty-eight hours. Chill the fuck out. We’re good, man.”
“I don’t doubt you are,” I told him truthfully.
Why I called, I didn’t exactly know. Simply put, I wasn’t good at letting go. When I left, I knew I would be away for weeks, maybe longer. I made the necessary arrangements. But as a man who rarely took time off, this setup was easier said than done.
Reaching in my pocket again, I lifted the lighter from its place and pulled it out. Flipping it open, I didn’t strike the flint. Instead, I thought of the four boys we once were. The four boys who found this lighter in a field. The four boys who grew into men the instant the flame danced in the hay on that fateful night.
“Did you ever think we would come this far?” I asked, thinking back to everything we experienced together.
“Fuck no,” he stated truthfully.
“Shit’s good.” I let out a huff. “Ever worry it’s too good?”
“Way I see shit, we paid our dues to all the fucked up pain early. Life now should be easy street.”
“Maybe for you.”
“Nah, Garrett, all of us.”
I paused and let the sound of the ocean soothe me.
“You good?” he asked. “Seem somber tonight. Happens with you from time to time, but to call me. This is your vacation, Garrett. Relax. So again, I’ll ask, you good?”
“Damn sure ain’t bad.”
“Take a month if you need it. For real, other than a weekend here and there, you never take time off. Put your toes in the sand. Get drunk. Fuck a stranger. I don’t know, but do something for you.”
I smirked. “Ah fuck, Onyx Blake, you’re gettin’ soft.”
To this, he laughed. “Ain’t a damn thing soft about me, especially my cock. Ask Torryn.”
“I don’t wanna think about your cock, you demented fuck,” I joked.
The tension eased as I went over a few business items with Onyx. We ended the call, and I sat out under the stars waiting. Enissa didn’t return to join me. Honestly, inside I knew she wouldn’t. Still, I waited for a bit … actually a little hopeful. This was a strange emotion for me; long ago I stopped holding onto things like hope or promises.
Standing, I tucked the phone and lighter in my pocket.
I strolled down the beach a little ways. The sand was cool under my feet compared to the heat earlier today. Stopping at the fire pit area, I leaned over, picked up the fire starter I left here when I prepped the space yesterday, and lifted it. Pulling the old Zippo lighter from my pocket, I flipped the top, struck the flint, and lit the fire starter before tossing it on the wood in the pit.
The scent of lemon and citronella filled my nostrils from the specialty fire starter Ellen Sue ordered for out here. It kept the bugs away, I would give her that. She liked the smell, and just like the furniture of my penthouse, Ellen Sue got whatever the fuck she wanted, including smell-good fire starters. Plopping down on the wicker couch, I watched the white caps of the waves roll in.
Over and over.
The soft glow of the fire gave color to the dark expanse in front of me.
Stretching out on the couch, I listened to the water.
The waves, they quieted as the ocean pulled back the tide, and there was this pause in time before the water rolled onto the shore in a crash before again quieting for the journey back to the sea.
Life was like the waves.
It sucked you in and crashed you down from one circumstance to the next but always continued to draw you back whether you landed hard or soft. No matter what life threw at me, I continued moving like the ocean.
This place was easy to lose myself in. Being here, I wasn’t Garrett Monroe, Attorney at Law. I wasn’t Garrett Monroe signing off paperwork to make dreams come true for families. This private sanctuary, I was simply Garrett, once a boy, now a man finding himself again.
From time to time the past had a way of creeping into my head. As much as I wanted to shut it all out, I couldn’t.
“Garrett,” Amos’ voice boomed, jolting me from sleep.
I sat up in my bed. Fear gripped me like never before. His shadow stalked toward me in the veil of night. I felt the firm grip of his hand on the back of my neck before my mind could register what was happening.
He yanked me up out of the bed. I struggled to get my footing. Half-dragging me, he carried me from the room I shared with Onyx, Paxton, and Dane. With a shove, he pushed me away from him, and I stumbled before standing up straight and tall.
He wouldn’t break me. No matter what he did to me, I wouldn’t let him get to me. I was determined.
“Your grandmother is dead.”
The air left my lungs. The room spun. My legs were weak. My mind was a wreck.
“Don’t shed a single tear,” Amos spoke, but his words fell on deaf ears.
The barrage of emotions assaulted my mind, my heart, and my soul truly shattered. The tears fell.
They fell for the woman who gave me love.
The back of his hand came harshly across my cheek.
“Do not cry, you weak boy.”
I could taste the metallic of my blood inside my mouth. It was bitter as was my heart.
The woman who loved me most in this world was gone.
“These moments show a man’s strength. His will to remain steady. His control,” Amos muttered, and I shut down.
The tears continued to fall, and the hits continued to barrage my feeble body. I was not a man but a teen boy who lost everything. My life would never be the same again.
I didn’t even get to say goodbye.
I knew what it was to lose everything. The next morning, I couldn’t open my eyes because they were swollen shut and crusted over in my blood. There wasn’t a single inch of me that didn’t hurt, but none of it compared to the reality…
I had no one to love me anymore.
Unlike the others in the orphanage, I had a family with my grandmother. I knew what it was to have a secure home filled with love and memories.
And then I didn’t.
Charles Beacon didn’t know loss, but he would.
The thoughts of my plans for Enissa eased my frustration. She didn’t know what I was capable of. She didn’t know I could be evil or I could be kind.
Rising from my place, I twisted to see my home. The light was on in the bedroom and while I couldn’t be certain, I thought I saw a shadow in the window. A silhouette of her looking down on me. Although, I wasn’t for sure, I thought I might as well make it fun for me.
Therefore, I lifted the shirt from my body and tossed it to the sand. From this distance she couldn’t see my scars or my tattoos, but she could see my body.
A body
I knew was fit because I worked out every day. It was how I kept the demons in my head at bay. Stretching, I decided to cool off by going for a swim.
I would go to bed beside her soon enough. For now, I’d swim in the clear blue sea and think of what it would be like to have her in this water wrapped around me.
She would submit.
In time, she would be mine.
7
Enissa
Dreams.
We all had them at some point in our lives. Sometimes during sleep mine decided to take over, feeling more real than a dream should be. More raw, open, and exposed.
For example, the heat coming from my back was attached to something very hard. An arm around my waist like a vise not allowing me much movement, connecting me to a body. The smell of the ocean, beach, and sandalwood made me feel as if I was right on the beach. Then the feel of the rise and fall of someone’s breath, then the slight inhalation of breaths moving my hair all rolled together.
Comfort. Peace. This moment felt exactly those.
Lately, so much worry ran through my mind all the time, and there was no downtime to relax and breathe. Between my mother’s sickness and this deal, it felt as though my life was in a tailspin, and I’d been unable to catch my breath.
That was why I didn’t make a movement or sound when my eyes fluttered open. For just a moment, I wanted to be in the fantasy.
Garrett was behind me, and he was strong, warm, and comforting. Even though it was merely the briefest of blips in time, I needed to feel that to give me strength to get through. I needed to pull from him even if he wasn’t planning on giving it.
Fear of the unknown could be crippling. I hadn’t the slightest clue what would come next, but I had to remain strong.
On my right side, the light beamed in the room. One window was open wide, giving a nice breeze and allowing the sounds of the ocean’s waves into the space. I watched as the water came upon the shore, then went back down. Over and over again it repeated itself, never stopping, never lulling.
It was constant. Something that I could clutch on to while here.
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