by L A Cotton
There was something hypnotic about the water; I had always felt drawn to it. Perhaps it was because it had always been part of my life—a part of me. I let myself get lost in the sight before me. The moonlight reflecting off the vast black ocean, the sound of the gentle waves lapping at the shore, the white horses racing onto the wet sand and then melting into oblivion. It was so serene. Something about it calmed me.
The trunk rocked as someone dropped down beside me. “What’s so interesting?” Paul’s voice pulled me from my comfort, but my eyes remained fixated on the shore.
“Just watching the sea.”
He studied me for a moment, dragging a hand through his sandy blond hair. “You’re not like most girls.”
I didn’t know how to take that, so I just shrugged and Paul laughed quietly.
“So I wanted to ask y-” Loud voices filling the beach cut Paul off.
“What up, dude. The party has arrived.”
My heart sank. The Fallen had arrived, in numbers. I couldn’t see Braiden or Jackson, but most of the team was present. I slid off my makeshift seat and sank into the sand, trying to disappear against the mighty trunk.
There wasn’t the usual silence at their arrival. A few people gawked like a bunch of celebrities had just gatecrashed the party, but mostly people just looked then turned back to their conversations. The Fallen congregated around the larger bonfire, and my eyes scanned the group again, looking for Braiden and Jackson. I couldn’t see them, but I did recognize one face. A face that I had hoped to avoid.
Chad.
He was wearing the number seventeen jersey, and I cursed myself for not realizing sooner. Of course, he was Fallen. That was just how swell my life was shaping up to be lately. It made sense. Braiden—or Briony—had obviously fed him some lies about me. I just didn’t understand why. It made no sense that Braiden harbored any resentment from that very first party at Fallen House. I was just another face in the dark to him, just another girl to be used then tossed aside, so why was Jackson so sure things would go bad for us if he knew? I still hadn’t figured it all out. Sure, there was the other argument, the one that had Braiden planning his sister and best friend’s wedding, and I had been a problem for his plan, but even that was a long stretch. No, it had to be something more, something bigger.
"You want a beer, Ana?" Paul asked, seemingly unaffected by the arrival of The Fallen, and my eyes darted from him to Chad and back. "No, no thanks." I smiled, but it was forced. Fake.
He shrugged and headed for the nearest cooler while Elena shifted next to me and tilted her head up to kiss Tyson. I rolled my eyes. They spent most of their time in a lip-lock, hardly coming up for air. I might as well not have been here, for all the lack of attention she paid me. Not that I needed attending to, but an acknowledgement now and again would have been nice. Dammit, who was I kidding? I was jealous. She had something that I didn't think I’d ever find again. Something I went and found without even looking… only to have it ripped away before I got my chance.
"Check it out, guys. The Fallen are having a beach party," a voice called out, dripping with sarcasm and bitterness.
This time the beach did fall silent. All eyes were on the dark haired, giant-like guy walking over to where most of the team were hanging. Stopping a few feet short of them, he said, "I thought you guys knew how to party? Or have things gone a little soft since Donohue arrived?"
A guy wearing the number two jersey stepped forward to meet the giant toe-to-toe. I only recognized him as one of the team. "And you are?"
"None of your concern. I'm looking for Donohue."
"Then you're shit out of luck. He's not here." He folded his arms over his puffed out chest, staring straight through the other guy.
Something sparked in the outsider’s eyes, and he lifted his chin a little in challenge, his nostrils flaring with anger. "Trust me; you don't want to fuck with me."
A low rumble of whispers bounced around the cove, the tension sizzling in the air. I shifted slightly to get a better look at whatever it was that now had everyone’s attention. My eyes narrowed, and I could just make out two white jerseys jogging toward the crowd. I didn't need to see the number one or thirteen, to know who it was.
Braiden and Jackson jogged around the small group of gatecrashers and flanked their teammate on either side. "Everything okay, Jase?"
Suddenly, number two jersey slotted into place. It was Jason O’Hara, the star quarterback benched to make way for Braiden's arrival.
"Yeah, man. This punk was asking about you." Jason tipped his head in the guy’s direction, and Braiden raked his eyes over him and then his friends, a slight smirk tugging at his lips. "You're a long way from home, Calder. Does Trey know you're out here?"
"Trey's out of town. Permanently. You broke the truce when you put your hands on Lyle."
Jackson tensed, watching Braiden out of the corner of his eye. Waiting. He was waiting for Braiden to snap, and took a slight step forward as if readying himself to intervene.
“That fuck comes to my town and tries to mess with my business? Never gonna happen. I was sending a message.” Braiden started to inch forward, and it was clear to me—and the whole damn beach—that he was close to losing his cool.
“Still, a little harsh don’t you think? You put a guy in the hospital,” said the guy Braiden had called Calder.
Braiden narrowed his eyes. I couldn’t quite see his face from my position, but I could imagine their ice blue glint biting into Calder. His chest moved up and down with his breath, as he clenched and unclenched his fists on either side of him. He was struggling to rein in his anger. Everyone could sense it.
Braiden moved into Calder’s space, meeting him almost nose to nose. “I’m giving you this one shot to walk away, Calder. Don’t start something that you can’t finish.”
I was sure that I heard someone near me suck in a breath, but I couldn’t take my eyes off the scene playing out in front of me. We were on the precipice of something that had the potential to get out of control very quickly.
It seemed like an eternity, but eventually Calder held up his hands in surrender and backed away a couple of paces. “Okay, okay. We’re going. But this isn’t the last of it, Donohue. Start shit up again and expect consequences.” His voice was thick with warning, but Braiden seemed unaffected, not taking his eyes off Calder and his friends as they left the beach.
People started to relax a little, restarting their paused conversations, although I suspected that now they would be talking about the showdown between Braiden and Calder.
“So, that was interesting,” Paul joked.
“Dios Mio, I thought they were going to duke it out.” Elena sounded far too excited about it all, and Tyson pulled her back into him and tickled her sides. “Duke it out? Babe, don’t ever say that shit again.”
“Anyone want to fill me in? Who is Calder and what in the hell just happened?” I said, keeping one eye on Jackson. He had been at Braiden’s side the second Calder pulled back, talking into his ear. What was it that Talia had said? Reining him in. Now they were back with the rest of the team, but from the strained expression on Jackson’s face, it wasn’t the end.
“That was Cole Calder, Reibeckitt’s very own version of Donohue. Except Cole is still in high school and has even less control of his shit.”
“Dude, you’re like a chick with all the gossip,” Tyson grunted.
“What? I just know things.”
Nate and Jamie joined us and dropped to the sand, sitting beside Tyson and Elena. Everyone started chatting about how things would play out after Cole’s stunt tonight. I pretended to be listening, but my attention was firmly set on Jackson. Even amongst all the crazy, my eyes had a mind of their own, roaming down his body. He was wearing his standard Fallen jersey over a long sleeve shirt and dark jeans, which hung low on his hips. His jersey hugged his biceps a little too tight and clung to his defined abs. My stomach clenched and I closed my eyes trying to shut down the memories of him kissing
me in the closet. Get a grip, Ana. You shouldn’t feel like this. Not about him, not after what he did.
When I opened my eyes, I found myself staring back at two green eyes that I could get lost in. Jackson’s expression faltered, for just a second, and I knew he was feeling it, too. Being near, but unable to be near. Our eyes remained locked before he smiled weakly and turned his attention back on Braiden… who had witnessed our brief exchange. His eyes narrowed in on me, and I dropped my gaze to the sand while my heart stopped.
If Braiden didn’t know before, he did now.
Chapter Thirteen
Friday night at Dead Man's Cove had been enough excitement for me for one weekend, so I had stayed dorm bound Saturday and Sunday. So far, I had managed to avoid Briony, Braiden, and Chad, but I didn't want to push my luck.
I was starting to feel emotionally battered from Jackson's mixed signals. But then I knew firsthand that you couldn't just turn off your feelings for someone—even when they were never coming back. I couldn’t decide if it made it easier or harder knowing that he seemed to be struggling with it, too.
"Chica, let's go. Classes are calling."
Elena was far too chirpy for the wet miserable morning awaiting us on the other side of the window, and I grunted some inaudible response as I followed her out of the door.
We set off in the direction of Carver Hall, and I pulled my jacket tighter to try to shut out the damp air. I knew Oregon was wet, but I hadn't realized just how cold it could get. It wasn’t even December yet, but it felt like winter had already arrived.
"Lunch?" Elena's teeth chattered as she spoke, making me smile. She looked all funny.
"Sure. Later." I broke off on the path to Carver, colliding straight into someone coming in the other direction. "Shit, my bad. Sorry." I stepped back to get a look at the wall of muscle I had just collided with.
"No problem, sweetheart."
Dammit. My pulse spiked. Just smile and carry on.
The predatory glint in Chad's eye made me shrink back. "Hey there, beautiful, I meant to catch up with you. I saw you down at the beach Friday night, but things got a little heated before I could come say hi." The way he said heated made me want to puke.
"Hmm, look Chad, I've got to get to class. See you around." I took a deep breath and stepped around him, but just as I passed him, he grabbed my arm and pulled me into him. His head dipped to my ear and his breath lingered against my ear. Shudders shot through me. And not in a good way. "You can count on it."
I yanked myself out of his hold and hurried away from him. My whole body was trembling from the threat behind his words. As I reached Carver, I could still feel his eyes on me, burning into my back. I rushed into the building but risked glancing over my shoulder. Chad was staring right at me with a perverse grin on his face.
Like my Monday wasn't already going well enough, I rounded the corner and stalled. Briony and Jackson were talking just to the side of the door to the auditorium. Jackson's back was to me, but Briony looked up and the bitch actually smiled straight at me, as she laid a hand on Jackson’s shoulder and stepped into him slightly, pressing herself up against him. He didn’t welcome her, but he didn’t stop her either, as she whispered something in his ear, never breaking eye contact with me. And then she mouthed, “He’s mine.”
I wanted to turn and run.
I wanted to get the hell out of this godforsaken place.
But most of all, I want to run straight up to Jackson and tell him that the people he called family were all freaking crazy.
Instead, I stalked straight past them, holding my head high and ignoring their presence. Even if I was barely holding on by a thread.
I might as well have skipped Gardner’s class; I hadn’t heard a single word he said. Lost in my own thoughts and fixated on Briony leering all over Jackson, I had spent the whole two hours pretty much zoned out. Or zoned in, whichever way you looked at it. The universe granted me a small reprieve and Bitchiony didn’t look once in my direction… but neither did Jackson.
Just as I grabbed my bag from under my chair, and inched off the seat to leave class, I looked up and saw him. And the huge purple bruise covering his cheek. The jagged, angry red cut under his eye and swelling distorting his usually perfect face. Jackson had taken a beating and my mind flooded with questions as my stomach bottomed out. Who had done this to him? Why? Did it have to do with Cole and Reibeckitt? Realizing that I was staring, my eyes flickered from his wounds and found Jackson looking straight back at me. I felt heat color my cheeks. The way he looked at me, with such reverence, left me breathless. I wanted to run to him and wrap my arms around him. Even though he seemed okay despite the cuts and bruises, I needed to hear him say it.
And then she moved in front of him, cutting our connection off, and I hauled my bag over my shoulder and all but ran out of there.
“Hey, where are you going?” Elena called, trailing after me as I rushed down the steps and past her.
“Hmm, sorry, gotta pee.” It was a total lie; I just needed to get out there. I needed to breathe. And it was impossible with Jackson so close by.
“You could have said something instead of totally ignoring me.”
We walked the rest of the way to the student center in silence. If I was going to get through my time at CFA, I had to do something about Jackson. He was the one who called things off—if we were ever really a thing in the first place. But every time our eyes met, they told me something different. Sure, Jackson had started to heal some of the brokenness in me, but now those cracks slowly ripped open again, with new scars forming in their place.
And I knew it wouldn’t be long until they would be irreparable. Until I was lost to them.
“You gonna pee then?” Elena’s eyes were the size of saucers, piercing me with their confusion.
“Huh?”
She pointed to the restroom door and shook her head. “What is with you, chica?”
I didn’t say anything as I left her standing in the foyer while I pretended to go pee. What could I possibly say? That I had started to feel again, for the first time in a year, after meeting Jackson. Only everyone else knew him as Pierce, best friend and sidekick to Braiden Donohue, the prodigal son of Chastity Falls very own Godfather. And for some unknown reason, Braiden didn’t want Jackson and I seeing each other, so much so that he had set his scary friend on to me. It could be because of his crazy-ass twin sister or because he wanted Jackson all to himself. I hadn’t worked out which yet. Oh, but there was this one time at the orientation party when Braiden pressed me up a wall and got hard. So maybe he wanted me? Who knew, this place was full of FREAKING CRAZY PEOPLE.
Yeah, that wouldn't make me sound like a crazy person at all.
After trying to pull my shit together, I splashed my face with some water and returned to Elena. She eyed me with caution as we filed into the cafeteria, and then turned her attention to Tyson, who was sitting in our usual spot with Paul and Nate.
“Here are my two favorite ladies.” Paul stood as we reached the table, offering me a seat next to him. I dropped into it and pulled my lips into a thin line, hoping it would pass off as a smile, but Elena noticed and scowled her disapproval.
“So, what’s the lowdown then, dude?” Nate flicked his chin at Paul.
“You saw, huh? Must’ve hurt.”
My body tensed.
“Really? Not you as well, Nate?” Tyson threw a chip at him and it landed on his sweater.
“Come on, you can’t tell me that you’re not even a little bit intrigued about what happened?”
Something resembling a grunt came from Tyson and Elena laughed, wrapping her slim arm around him. “Someone’s grumpy today.”
He turned to her and whispered something in her ear causing her to shriek and then break out in giggles. My eyes darted away.
“Anyway, so rumor has it after Friday’s stunt, Braiden decided to dish out a little payback. He and some of the team went over to Reibeckitt and crashed their party. Things got ugly.
"
I had zeroed in on Paul’s words. Reibeckitt. Braiden had gone to Reibeckitt. Which meant that Jackson had been there.
“… he lost it. Took Pierce, Ky, and Travis to haul him off Cole.”
Nate muttered, “Shit’s about to get crazy. Someone in my class went to school with Braiden, the guy holds a grudge.”
“Tell us something we don’t know,” Paul added.
Perfect. The guy holds a grudge.
“Braiden hasn’t got a scratch on him, but Pierce wasn’t so lucky. One of their guys got ahold of him and kicked the shit out of him.”
My stomach lurched, and I jumped up from the table. Four heads whipped up at my startled movement. “Hmm, just remembered I got an appointment. Gotta run.” I ignored the guys’ expressions, looking directly at Elena. “I’ll see you back at the dorm.” I raised my eyebrows a little, hoping she would recognize my plea for her to cover with the guys for me.
She faltered for a second and then said, “Oh, yeah right, I remember. We’ll talk about it later.” I heard the promise in her voice; Elena wanted answers. My time of keeping everything to myself was quickly running out.
I had wanted the privacy of my own space, but the minute the door closed behind me, I felt like a caged animal. While pacing up and down, I tried to figure out my next move. Jackson made it clear—no contact. But he had broken that rule more than once.
