The Doctor's Engagement

by Sarah Morgan

  ‘Holly, Holly.’ Groaning her name, he kissed her deeply, his mouth trailing slowly down her body, making her gasp and writhe as he seduced her still further with his lips and tongue.

  Sobbing with need, she grasped his shoulders and drew him towards her, her body shivering under his.

  He pulled away slightly, his breathing heavy and his dark eyes glittering with arousal.

  ‘Holly.’ His groan reflected an agony of indecision as he stared down at her and she felt a mix of desperation and panic. Surely he wasn’t going to stop? Not now...

  With a cry of protest she slid a delicate hand over his chest, feeling the steady thud of his heartbeat, feeling his muscles tense as her hands moved lower to touch him intimately for the first time.

  Her heart almost stopped as she felt his strength and power, as she touched his silken heat. Part of her was shocked by her own behaviour, but the desire to know him as a man was overwhelming and she could no more stop touching him than she could stop breathing.

  With a fractured groan he dropped his head onto her shoulder, his harsh moan telling her exactly how much her touch affected him. Finally he reached down and grasped her wrist, the fire in his eyes reflecting the depth of his passion.

  This time there was no indecision in his gaze, only a quiet intent that made her heart beat faster, her whole body drenched with excitement. It was going to happen, she knew it was. Mark was going to make love to her.

  With a hand that wasn’t quite steady, Mark reached over and pulled something out of the drawer by the bed, his eyes still holding hers.

  ‘Are you sure?’ His voice was urgent and very male and she could barely breathe for wanting him.

  ‘Yes.’ She moved under him, her breathing unsteady. ‘Yes, very. Please...’

  With a swift movement he sheathed himself and then he lowered his head and kissed her, capturing her mouth with his as he positioned himself, obviously unable to wait even another moment. With infinite care and gentleness he entered her, giving her time to adjust to his strength and size before pushing deeper.

  ‘Mark!’ The heat and power of his possession as he surged inside her made her gasp and curl her fingers into the smooth muscle of his broad shoulders.

  ‘My Holly.’ Mark groaned her name softly and Holly drowned in the sensations that swamped her, moving instinctively to the rhythm that he set.

  Suddenly breathing seemed difficult. Never in her life could she remember a time when she’d had to remind herself to breathe—until now. Never in her life had she imagined that to make love would feel like this—as if she were totally and wholly part of another human being.

  In awe of the feelings that washed over her heated body, she lifted a hand and touched his face, gasping as he quickened his movements, as he lifted her hips to take him deeper.

  The excitement spiralled out of control and with a soft cry she felt the sensations explode inside her, driving her to the edge of sensory awareness. Clutching his shoulders, she cried out his name, knowing from his harsh groan that he’d reached the same peak, that he understood what she was feeling because he was feeling it, too.

  Mindless, she clung to him, feeling the sheen of sweat on his powerful shoulders, aware of his harsh breathing, as uneven and ragged as her own. Then he released her from his weight and rolled over, taking her with him, his arms still wrapped around her possessively.

  Risking a glance at him, she saw that his eyes were firmly closed, thick dark lashes brushing his incredible bone structure.

  Mark. Her Mark.

  Relieved that he didn’t want to talk, she nestled closer to his hard body and allowed herself to relax against him, knowing that this was probably the last time she’d be able to do so. For the rest of the night she could still pretend that everything was fine.

  But everything wasn’t fine. Not really. After tonight how could anything ever be the same again?

  Tomorrow she was going to have to face reality...

  CHAPTER NINE

  HOLLY lay perfectly still, eyes tightly shut against the early morning sunshine.

  She’d seduced Mark.

  Dear God, she’d seduced the man.

  She’d felt his indecision, his hesitation when she’d touched him, but she’d made it impossible for him to say no.

  How could she have behaved like that? What had come over her?

  And how was she going to be able to face him?

  It was time to get up, and she knew from the way that his breathing had changed in the last few minutes that he was well and truly awake. And he was watching her. She sensed him watching her.

  ‘Unless you’re planning to spend the rest of your life with your eyes shut,’ he murmured softly, ‘you’re going to have to look at me eventually.’

  Holly covered her face with her hands. Overwhelmingly shy and embarrassed, she didn’t know what to say. How could she even begin to pretend that their relationship hadn’t changed after last night? It was beyond even her acting skills.

  ‘Holly!’ His deep voice rang with a mixture of exasperation and laughter. ‘Look at me! If you don’t open your eyes in the next ten seconds, I’ll use force.’

  Taking a deep breath, she lowered her hands and reluctantly opened her eyes.

  ‘That’s better.’ Mark caught her chin in his strong fingers and kept her face towards him. ‘I want to look at you while we have this conversation.’

  Holly gave a small moan and squeezed her eyes closed again. ‘What conversation?’

  ‘For goodness’ sake, Holly!’ He took a deep breath, hovering between bewilderment and impatience. ‘After everything we did last night I wouldn’t have thought you could possibly be shy with me.’

  Was he joking? It was precisely because of everything they’d done that she was shy.

  But, then, he was a great deal more experienced than she was and what they’d shared obviously didn’t embarrass him in the least.

  Holly forced herself to open her eyes again and her heart thudded as she saw just how near he was. He lay on his side, watching her closely, the muscles of one shoulder bunching as he supported his weight. His hard jaw was rough with dark stubble and he looked overwhelmingly masculine and very, very sexy.

  ‘So go on.’ His voice was gruff. ‘Why are you so shy with me? You weren’t shy last night.’

  His blatant reminder of what they’d shared made her face heat and she was embarrassingly aware of every delicious ache and tingle in her body, unfamiliar sensations that his loving had induced.

  ‘You know why,’ she mumbled, her face scarlet. ‘Because we—we—and I don’t know what happens now.’

  There was a pause while he watched her.

  ‘Why don’t you tell me what you’d like to happen,’ he said carefully, the expression on his handsome face giving nothing away.

  What would she like to happen?

  She’d like him to tell her that he loved her, but that was ridiculous, of course. Mark would never love her. At least, not like that. In fact, after last night—after what she’d done—she wasn’t even confident that he would even love her as a friend any more.

  Which brought her to another problem. Mark had a sharp brain. It would take him no time at all to put two and two together and work out that for her to have seduced him—behaviour so totally out of character—she must be in love with him. She had to convince him that she’d just been reacting to an emotional situation. Their whole friendship depended on it.

  ‘I want us to stay friends,’ she told him firmly, mentally crossing her fingers, hoping that he’d believe her. The incredulous lift of one eyebrow confirmed that it wasn’t going to be that easy.

  ‘Friends?’ He stared at Holly for a long time, his gaze probing. ‘You want us to stay friends?’

  She swallowed hard. Obviously he didn’t believe that that was what she wanted at all. Which meant she had some serious work to do if she wanted to convince him. And she did want to convince him. No way could she have Mark knowing how she truly felt. He�
��d run a mile.

  After all, none of this was Mark’s fault. He’d tried to refuse her, but she’d seduced him. He’d just been comforting her, and she’d taken advantage, knowing that he was too much of a gentleman to refuse her. It was all her fault. If she hadn’t been upset...

  And now she’d put him in an impossible position, so it was up to her to rescue the situation. To try and make things easy for him.

  ‘Of course, Mark. Friends. What else?’ With a decisive movement she tried to scramble out of the bed, only to fall back onto the mattress as Mark grabbed her wrist and pulled her down again.

  ‘No way.’ He rolled himself half on top of her, using his considerable strength to stop her from escaping. ‘We haven’t finished talking.’

  Holly squeezed her eyes tightly shut, her heart thudding as she felt his hard body against hers. This was the worst kind of torture. She really didn’t need such an intimate reminder of how his body felt.

  ‘There isn’t anything to say, Mark.’

  He swore under his breath. ‘If you close your eyes one more time—’

  She opened her eyes. ‘Let’s just forget it—please. As far as I’m concerned, nothing has changed between us.’

  After all, that was what he wanted to hear, wasn’t it? He didn’t want to hear her declaring undying love.

  There was a long silence while he stared down at her, a muscle working in his lean jaw. ‘You’re serious? You’re asking me to forget it?’

  She swallowed hard. ‘Yes.’

  His breathing was unsteady and suddenly his dark eyes were searching. Looking for the truth. ‘Is that really what you want?’

  No. But it was what he wanted. She knew that.

  ‘I just want things to be how they were,’ she whispered, knowing that things would never again be how they were. ‘I want to put the clock back. I want us to be friends—’

  ‘Friends. You keep using that word.’ His hard jaw seemed to clench slightly. ‘So what do we do about last night?’

  ‘We forget it. Last night was my fault,’ Holly said bravely. ‘You never would have touched me if I hadn’t been upset. You were just...comforting me, and it got out of hand.’

  ‘Are you saying that you regret it Holly?’

  Her breath was coming in rapid gasps.

  ‘Yes,’ she lied, not quite meeting his eyes. Because of last night nothing was ever going to be the same. She ought to regret it. But she didn’t. How could she ever regret an experience like the one that they’d shared. ‘We never should have done that.’

  ’Done that?’ One dark eyebrow lifted sardonically. ‘Done what precisely?’

  Holly squirmed. Was he going to make her spell it out? ‘Done...what we did,’ she said lamely. ‘Had...sex.’

  ‘Had sex.’ His expression was grim. ‘I see.’

  ‘We’re friends and nothing more,’ Holly said firmly, gaining confidence as she voiced what she thought he wanted to hear.

  ‘Nothing more...’ His tone was flat as he repeated her words, and he stared down at her for endless seconds. Then he rolled away and got to his feet in one lithe movement, grabbing his boxer shorts from the back of the chair and pulling them on. ‘Well, I’m glad we’ve cleared that up.’

  Holly clasped the sheet under her chin and stared at him anxiously. ‘We’re agreed, then? Does our relationship stay the same as it always has?’

  ‘Of course,’ he said grimly, yanking a T-shirt over his head with such violence that Holly expected the material to tear. ‘Why should one night of—what was it? Oh, yes, sex. Why should one night of sex affect a lifelong friendship?’

  ‘Why, indeed,’ she agreed nervously, wondering why he seemed so angry. He was virtually throwing things! ‘But...if we’re both agreed, why are you so angry?’

  ‘I’m not angry!’ He swept his watch off the table and glared at her. ‘Why the hell should I be angry?’

  Because she’d made him do something he hadn’t wanted to do? Because she’d ruined their friendship?

  ‘I—I don’t know.’ She stared at him miserably. ‘I just don’t want things to change between us.’

  There was a long silence while he struggled to control his breathing. ‘Dammit, why am I doing this?’ He raked a hand through his dark hair and sank onto the bedroom chair, his shoulders slumped. He suddenly looked weary. ‘Holly, I haven’t been honest with you, and it’s time I was honest.’

  Holly felt as though she’d stepped under a cold shower. He was going to tell her that he could never love her because he was in love with someone else. He was making sure that she was in no doubt about the nature of their relationship. He always did that with women, she knew he did. So that he could never be accused of misleading them. Look at the lengths he’d gone to just to convince Caroline that he wasn’t interested in her.

  Well, she didn’t need him to be honest with her. She knew that he could never love her but that didn’t mean she wanted him to spell it out. Not now. Not this morning. Not after what they’d shared last night.

  ‘No, Mark.’ She clutched the sheet to her breasts, her blonde hair tumbling over her shoulders. ‘You don’t need to be honest. I know how you feel.’

  Mark frowned and leaned forward in the chair. ‘No, Holly, you don’t. I—’

  ‘Please, Mark, no!’ She clapped her hands over her ears and shook her head. ‘I just can’t bear to talk about this now. I just can’t bear it.’

  Even though she knew he didn’t love her and never would, she still didn’t feel able to hear him telling her how much he loved another woman.

  ‘Holly.’ His voice was hoarse and she forced herself to look at him, to mask the pain in her eyes.

  ‘I’m sorry, Mark,’ she said softly. ‘I’m so sorry about everything.’

  ‘So you keep saying,’ he said wearily, his whole body tense as he stood up and strode across the bedroom, yanking open the bathroom door with a force that threatened to remove the handle. ‘I get the message.’

  Wincing as the door slammed behind him, Holly stared after him, her heart sinking like a lump of lead. Was he cross because they’d made love, or because she hadn’t wanted to hear about the woman he loved?

  How were they ever going to salvage anything of their old relationship after this?

  * * *

  She skipped breakfast and drove to the medical centre early so that she could avoid seeing Mark again.

  She shut herself in her room, her heart sinking as she acknowledged that the situation couldn’t carry on for ever. Sooner or later she was going to have to face him.

  The morning passed surprisingly quickly as she renewed dressings, took bloods, syringed ears and dealt with various minor injuries.

  She was just giving advice to a tourist who’d developed diarrhoea when the phone rang. It was Mark.

  ‘I’ve got a fifty-five-year-old man who’s been having blackouts and chest pain,’ he said briskly, coming straight to the point. ‘He’s got a heart rate of thirty-five beats a minute and I suspect he’s got heart block. Are you in a position to do a 12-lead ECG for me?’

  She swallowed. ‘Of course. Send him along now.’

  She quickly finished with the lady she was dealing with. ‘Drink plenty of fluid, Mrs Page, and contact the surgery again if the symptoms are no better in twenty-four hours or if abdominal pain is persistent or severe.’

  Mrs Page stood up, her face pale and drawn. ‘Should I take any medicines?’

  ‘Better not to,’ Holly advised. ‘Unless you’ve got to go on a long coach journey or something similar, it’s actually best to let your body clear itself of the problem.’

  ‘Well, thanks for seeing me.’ The woman walked towards the door and Holly gave her a sympathetic smile.

  ‘I’m sure you’ll soon be better and able to enjoy the rest of your holiday.’

  She glanced up, her body tensing as she saw Mark striding towards her, his handsome face expressionless as he met her eyes.

  ‘This is Mr Fox,’ he introduced the b
alding, slightly overweight man standing next to him. ‘I’ll be in my room when you’ve finished.’

  ‘Thanks.’ Holly stood to one side to let the man pass, staring after Mark with a growing feeling of despondency. Had it really been worth it? One night of total bliss seemed to have cost her the entire friendship.

  ‘Just remove your shirt and your socks, Mr Fox.’ She drew the curtain across to ensure his privacy and made a determined effort to bury her personal problems. ‘I’m going to attach some wires to your chest to perform this test, but it’s completely painless.’

  ‘I hope this is a lot of fuss about nothing,’ the man muttered breathlessly, shifting himself slightly on the trolley. ‘Everyone blacks out occasionally, don’t they?’

  ‘It’s still worth investigating, Mr Fox.’ Holly smeared the electrodes with contact jelly and attached them to his wrists and ankles with the straps. ‘The ECG gives us a picture of what your heart is doing. I need you to relax.’

  Carefully she recorded each of the leads in turn, recording a longer tracing in lead II to act as a rhythm strip for Mark. Then she marked the tracings with a pen to make it easier to read.

  ‘So what happened?’ Carefully she attached a chest lead to the fourth intercostal space joining the right sternal border. ‘What were you doing at the time?’

  ‘Helping my daughter move house.’ He watched as she attached the other chest leads. ‘I was lugging furniture and boxes and then I had this crushing pain in my chest. I thought it was indigestion.’

  Holly switched the machine to V setting and recorded the six tracings.

  ‘And you’ve never had that sort of pain before?’

  He looked uncomfortable. ‘Well, I have had chest pain before, but I always assumed it was indigestion.’

  Holly removed the leads and helped him sit up. ‘You never went to the doctor?’

  ‘No.’ He slipped on his shirt and looked worried. ‘Should I have done?’

  Holly ripped the ECG tracing from the machine and gave him a warm smile. ‘You’re here now, Mr Fox,’ she said quietly, ‘That’s the main thing. I’ll just take this to Dr Logan so that he can look at it while you’re getting dressed.’