by Olivia Myers
Felicity first started with a basic childhood question. “How would you describe your childhood?”
It was hard to hear, but his low, rumbling voice replied, “Fine.” This seemed to be the answer of choice for him, as he continued the entire conversation with this and variations of it: “alright,” “okay,” and neutral grunts.
Three hours later and her patience wearing thin. Felicity sighed, running a hand through her curls. She was hot and sweaty. The fan in the corner did little to cool the room.
Then something amazing happened. Jebá finally spoke a complete sentence in perfect English. Unfortunately it also was a question.
“Why are you here?”
“Um…to speak with you about your experiences living here?”
“No,” he said. “Why did you come here - to Brazil?”
“Excuse me?”
“You don’t belong here, Senhorita. You’ll get yourself killed if you stay.” He spoke with conviction.
“You have no right to say that,” Felicity said angrily.
“Perhaps.” He began to walk away. “I look forward to our next meeting, Felicidade.” As he opened the door, a flock of doves pecking on the ground suddenly flew off in a panic. “Try not to get lost in the jungle…again.”
***
Even two days later, the comment still sent chills up her spine. Felicity’s mind tried to see it as a joke, but the implications of what it meant if he actually knew were huge. For one, it could mean he was one of the members of the Selvagens Verdes. She racked her brain trying to remember if she had seen anything resembling a tattoo on his neck, but to no avail.
“Are you planning to actually do something today?” Carol asked. “You’ve been sitting in those ugly pajamas all morning. Shouldn’t you be working on your project or something?”
“Shouldn’t you? Shopping at a mall is not a project!” Felicity snapped back.
“It is according to our dear professor,” she replied with a gloat. “But seriously, you’re really bumming me out. Why don’t you visit that guy at that boring talking place?”
Putting her head under her pillow she groaned, “Because he’s an unhelpful jerk.” And probably a part of a killer gang. “Why are you still dating that other guy? I told you he’s dangerous!”
“Yeah, so you say,” Carol said.
Felicity had told her that his tattoo was identical to the gang members’ now constantly reported by the news, but Carol didn’t believe her.
“I know you’re probably just jealous,” Carol said, “but please stop bad mouthing my future fiancé.”
As soon as Carol had left, Felicity grumbled every curse word in the book. Trying to get her mind off of her dim-witted roommate, she turned to a book she had borrowed from Pedro’s library. Since Felicity could no longer count on getting information from humans about the Barasana culture, she would have to rely on text. Flipping through the pages describing various mythologies, she found an image nearly identical to the one carved into the stone wall that had entranced her.
The content discussed the origin myth of the Barasana tribe. As Pedro had told her on that first night, the jebá-beca believed that long ago an ancient jaguar deity gave life to the tribe. The original ancestors were large jaguars that roamed the land and protected the forest from men. Over time, as man became more predominant, they slowly began to take over the form of men. Many lineages lost their magic forms, and could no longer take on the shape of their god. However, the tribe believed that some still possessed jaguar blood, and could walk both as a man and a beast.
But the words couldn’t explain away the suspicions the wildest parts of her imagination were now raising. If Jebá wasn’t one of the Selvagens Verdes, could he have been the jaguar? She laughed the idea away, but it persisted. Stop it, Felicity, she told herself, angry for even entertaining the idea. As she got ready for bed, Felicity decided it was finally time to face the man again. She was not going to let anything get in the way of finishing her project, especially not some harebrained idea about a human being able to shape-shift into a jaguar.
***
For the next week Felicity stuck to her guns. Although Jebá tried his best to deter and ignore her questions, she persisted – even staying after hours until he finally relented. Eventually she began to crack his wall. On the seventh day, Felicity actually managed to make him answer a question on her first try.
“What was the most challenging part about growing up in an isolated village?”
“Staying isolated,” he responded.
“What do you mean?”
“My people are connected to the jungle. And we are all connected to one another – in blood and spirit,” Jebá answered with conviction. “From what I have seen, ‘civilized people’ try to sever that connection by attempting to make us ‘modern’.”
As she quickly scribbled down his answers, he asked, “May I ask you a question now, Senhorita Felicidade?”
“Is it about the reason why I’m here again?” she asked stiffly.
“No,” he replied with a slight frown.
“Okay then.”
“Do you believe in things you cannot explain?”
Where the heck did that come from? Felicity thought as she tried to articulate an answer. “I-I don’t know. I mean…I suppose I always try to come up with a logical explanation for things.”
“I see,” he grunted, getting up to leave.
In a fit of desperation to have him stay, she suddenly began spilling unfiltered thoughts. “But certain events have recently made me start to question whether everything that happens can have a logical explanation.”
He stopped, but didn’t turn around. “What events?”
“I’m not sure…” Felicity hesitated. How could she explain the most traumatic and strangest event in her life to an almost complete stranger? She felt herself blush when she remembered her wild idea about him being a mythological jaguar-man.
Watching her closely, Jebá said, “Perhaps we should discuss this elsewhere.”
***
The two traveled along a trail behind the main building, turning down a small passageway that was hidden by brush. The forest was uncharacteristically silent; she realized it was the distinct lack of bird calls.
“It’s so quiet,” Felicity said.
Jebá said, “The animals fear a predator nearby.”
Anxious at the thought of meeting a jaguar again, or some other vicious creature, she stuck closer to him. They eventually arrived at a large tree. Barely visible through the thick canopy, Felicity saw a tree house built around the trunk.
Jebá uncovered a pulley lift hidden by large leaves. He gestured that Felicity should stand on it. Stepping on after her, Jebá began to pull them up. Felicity was surprised to see his strength as he effortlessly lifted them quickly to the house. She felt herself blushing as she thought of how strong his arms looked.
The interior was mostly bare with only blankets, fresh herbs, several clay pots, and scattered wooden carvings. Jebá sat down and asked, “So what has made you question your own beliefs?”
“It’s pretty hard to explain,” Felicity answered shyly. “And you’ll probably get mad at me for being so stupid. I know I still am.”
“And what did you do that would make me believe you were stupid?” he inquired, his green eyes shining with slight amusement.
“Well…” she then went on to explain how she had gotten separated from her group at the ruins and had stupidly wandered off the trail and into the jungle. She paused, scared to continue.
“It is all right, Felicidade,” Jebá said with sincerity, placing a hand over hers.
Exhaling loudly, she forced herself to revisit that awful memory. She recounted how she had stumbled across the Green Savages and her capture. She then described how the jaguar had been the one to save her life. How viciously it had killed them and how terrified she had been that she would also die. But for some reason the jaguar had decided to spare her.
Feli
city hadn’t even known she was crying until she saw wet spots begin to appear on the wooden floor. “Oh, crap. S-sorry,” she said, wiping her tears away.
“There is no need to apologize. You are still trying to heal your spirit.” He handed her a cup of lukewarm herbal tea. “Have you told anyone else?”
“No.”
“Why?”
“I guess … I didn’t really want to bother anyone. And…I just wanted things to keep going the way they should.”
“Maintaining illusions is foolish,” Jebá said, sounding more matter-of-fact than scolding.
“Yeah, I think you’re right,” Felicity replied, taking a sip of the tea. The extremely bitter taste made her cringe involuntarily. Her grimace made Jebá laugh for the first time since they’d met. Nearly gagging she asked, “What is this supposed to do?”
“Nothing,” he answered with a mischievous grin. “I just wanted to see your reaction.”
“Jerk,” she said, placing the awful liquid down. “Do you live here?”
“Yes.”
“It must be nice living out in the middle of nature.”
“It is fine,” he replied, taking a sip of his own tea without a flinch. “Though I am hardly ever here.”
“Where do you go?”
“I occasionally visit relatives at the village once a month,” he said. “But I prefer to travel through the forest.”
“Aren’t you afraid of getting hurt?”
“No. I find that most others are the ones afraid of me.” While at first she thought he was being macho, his expression looked lonely.
“I’m not afraid of you,” Felicity said.
He looked at her, his face unsure. “Are you certain?”
Before she could answer, her cell phone began ringing, making them both jump. Felicity answered to Pedro’s concerned voice and explained were she was. After she ended the call, she looked at Jebá. “Sorry, I have to go.”
As he left her at the building’s parking lot, Felicity said, “Thank you for sharing your home with me, and listening to my troubles.”
“I want to show you more, if that’s all right,” he said.
Felicity nodded.
“Good.” He smiled. “Meet me tomorrow early here, and I will take you to my village.”
She was surprised, but nodded as she got into Pedro’s car. Jebá’s village had been one of the main things she had asked about during the interviews, but he had always shut down. Things were definitely different between them now. She’d shared something personal, something that made her feel vulnerable. Perhaps by doing so, she’d earned his trust.
***
Back at the house, she was greeted with an unexpected emotional outburst from Lupita.
“That girl is going to get herself killed,” the maid whispered angrily at Felicity. “I know you probably have given up on her, but please tell her not to go out tonight! I feel it in my heart that something bad will happen!”
“I-I’ll try,” Felicity said, shocked at Lupita’s fear and anger. She hadn’t known that anyone else knew about Carol and Davi.
“Please, Felicidade! I cannot bear to see another girl go missing!” She then began sobbing as she ran into the bathroom.
“Lupita…” Felicity couldn’t imagine the grief she was going through, but decided not to disturb her; she remembered Jebá’s words about the soul needing to heal.
Walking into their room, she saw Carol putting on mascara and batting her eyelashes.
“Oh there you are,” Carol said. “Hey, can you tell me if this looks good or not?” she asked, twirling a new red dress.
Felicity ignored the dress. “Lupita was telling me that you shouldn’t go out tonight.”
“Ugh, not you, too. Geez that superstitious maid wouldn’t shut up about it.”
“Come on, Carol, you know it’s not safe right now,” she said. “I don’t want to have to tell Professor Johnson.”
“Excuse me?” Carol said, her eyes now dark. “Are you threatening me? First off, it’s none of your business. Second, you and I both know that Professor Johnson would believe me over you in a second. Don’t try to deny it.” She smirked. “And I’m sure he’d be unhappy to hear about your relationship with that Jebá guy. I haven’t done much of the reading, but even I know a personal relationship with a subject is a big no-no.”
Felicity blushed at the accusation. “What? We don’t have a relationship! I just interview him!”
“Like I said… who is Professor Johnson going to believe?”
Furious, Felicity went to her room and slammed the door shut. Fine! That stupid bitch wants to get killed then whatever! I am done being her babysitter!
Despite the relatively thick walls, she could swear she hear Lupita crying as Carol walked out of the villa. Felicity’s stomach churning with guilt and confusion over her feelings about Jebá, she tried her best to study. Trying to distract herself by reading, it wasn’t long before she realized it was in vain. Even as she closed her eyes to sleep, all she could see were his green eyes and that haunting expression.
***
Felicity decided to take a cab alone to the facility early the next morning. She hadn’t bothered to check whether or not Carol had come home, as she was still fuming at the threat. Her phone had no messages. Chucking the device in her bag, she told herself that she was going to forget about everything else. Felicity had waited weeks for an opportunity to visit an actual Barasana village, and she wasn’t going to squander it on thoughts about Carol.
Although the building was closed, it wasn’t long before Jebá arrived. He seemed more restless than usual.
“Is something wrong?” she asked.
“The forest is wary. The danger you faced is growing,” he replied gravelly.
“Should we do this later?”
“No,” he said. “It will be fine. My village is safe for now. Let us go quickly.”
As before, Jebá led them through a series of sharp turns and hidden trails. Felicity was sure that no person would ever be able to follow them, much less find the tribe. He suddenly took her hand and said words in a language she didn’t understand. “The guards were going to kill you if I did not tell them you were with me.”
“Guards?” Felicity could not see anyone within the thick brush.
“You would not see them unless they wanted you to,” he explained.
A short time later they arrived at a clearing. While there was nothing on the forest floor, she looked into the trees to find a vast network of tree houses and bridges. However, it all seemed empty.
He called out, speaking soothing words in Barasana. Immediately, people began to come out from the huts and from behind the trees on ropes. An old woman suddenly appeared behind them, giving Felicity a disgusted look. In a harsh voice, she spoke angrily to Jebá. He replied calmly. The woman shook her head and walked away.
“Who was that?” Felicity asked nervously.
“Our spiritual leader.”
“She seemed angry.”
“She doesn’t like that I fraternize with outsiders.”
“Maybe I should leave. I don’t want to cause you trouble.”
Jebá shook his head. “It is no fault of yours, Felicidade.”
She wasn’t totally convinced, but decided not to press her luck. She had only one shot to complete her work, and she wasn’t going to squander it. Trying to work quickly and smoothly, Felicity asked basic questions about daily life, religion, and cultural rituals to anyone that would not run away or shun them.
To be fair, it seemed that it was only her that they disliked. Jebá was actually pretty popular as far as she could tell. He received multiple bows, gifts, and even the occasional smile from the otherwise stone-faced villagers. The young women in the camp appeared to favor him as well, giving him small trinkets before running away while giggling.
While this made Felicity slightly jealous, she was even more amused to see him blush whenever this happened. Looking closer at the charms, she noticed t
hey had quite suggestive shapes. The realization made her start blushing as well.
As they talked to her last interviewee, two small boys placed a white flower on her lap while saying a few words. Jebá grinned and replied back, patting one on the head. The twins laughed and then went off to play.
“What did they say?” Felicity asked curiously, while sniffing the flower.
“They said you were funny looking.”
“And what did you say?”
“I said I agree.”
Scowling, she crossed her arms and turned around with a huff.
Laughing he said, “Come on. I want to show you something.”
***
They arrived at a waterfall. The sunlight over its gorgeous, cascading falls caused rainbows to form in the cool mist. As much as she wanted to take a picture, Felicity didn’t want to take the chance of ruining the moment.
Jebá motioned her to walk behind the waterfall. Her stomach suddenly fluttered, though she didn’t know why.
Once inside, she saw that it was a cavern. There were wood shavings scattered across the stone floor, and a chair and table with unfinished carvings. Felicity went to one that seemed familiar. It had a gaping mouth and sharp teeth.
“Do you want to finish that one?” he asked.
“I don’t know how to carve.”
Placing her hand in his, Jebá guided her towards the knife. Together they started to slowly free the beast from the wooden block. Felicity could feel her face get pink, but she didn’t pull away.
Suddenly Jebá spoke, his voice a deep rumble behind her. “I lied.”
“About what?”
“About what the boys said,” Jebá answered, stopping their carving. He clasped her hands slightly tighter. “They said you were beautiful. And I agreed. I think you’re beautiful, Felicidade.”
Not knowing what to say, she stayed silent and turned to face him. His eyes seemed to glow in the darkness. Before she knew what was happening, Felicity moved her lips to his. The kiss seemed to set off a chain reaction. Soon she could feel his hands tracing over her body and under her thin shirt. One of her hands felt his chiseled chest and abdomen, as the other clasped the back of his head. Her fingers wove into his dark curls.
