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He cannot be serious, I thought, as he ran a hand across my stomach up toward my northern territories.
I guess he is. Then it occurred to me.
“I know what we can do,” I said, swinging my legs over the side of the bed to stand.
He watched me with interest as I rummaged in my bag till I found what I was looking for. I pulled out the pair of purple heels. “You can help me figure out how to walk in these things,” I said, grinning.
I don’t think it was what he had in mind, but it was about all I could handle at that point. And he turned out to be quite a dab hand at walking in heels, which was one of those things I placed firmly under my “don’t ask” policy.
Somehow we got through dinner that night. It was a more formal affair than the smorgasbord from the night before, with all of us sitting down for a proper meal. We sat with Chester, the ifrit, and a few nahuals. They kept talking about their stock portfolios, which once I got over how bizarre that was struck me as incredibly boring. So I smiled and nodded, concentrating on keeping my ass covered by my short dress. Ryu asked as many questions as he thought was safe, but didn’t seem to discover anything. As Elspeth had said, no one knew anything about Jimmu’s recent activities.
During dinner there was also some entertainment. An Alfar singer warbled an incredibly long and monotonous ditty that sounded like what Enya might dream up while in a Nyquil-induced hypnogogic state. Then there were some ifrit fire jugglers and some acrobatic nahuals that would shift shape midway through their tumbles. Under any other circumstances I would have been riveted, but considering what we’d learned that day I just wanted to crawl underneath my bed and stay there till I could go home.
We begged off early, thank heavens, and snuck back to the safety of our room. The only thing that made the otherwise nightmarish day I’d had worth it was the look on Ryu’s face when he held up a condom and I shook my head no, remembering Morrigan’s assurances. After we’d had gloriously infertile, crabs-free, bareback sex—much to Ryu’s delight—and when it was time for me to sleep, Ryu kissed me good night and got out of bed. But he didn’t leave. Instead, he took his book and sat with his back to the door. I knew he’d stay there like that all night, protecting me until I was awake and it was his turn to shut down and rest. I was mentally and emotionally exhausted, but I’d been convinced I would never get to sleep. Instead, I curled up and was out like a light, hardly able to believe it myself.
CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
In the end, I decided to go to breakfast. Part of me wanted to stay holed up with Ryu till he woke, but my stomach was in no way agreeing with that idea. Every time I picked up the phone to try to call down for food, I ended up getting yelled at by a male voice speaking what I think was Arabic. So, by that point in the morning, I was starving. In fact, my stomach was growling so loudly that I thought it might wake even the vampire up, and since Jimmu was supposed to be in absentia, I figured I was fairly safe. Then again, I threatened, if my stomach got my head chopped off, I’d never feed it again.
As I’d discovered yesterday, with Elspeth, breakfast was a haphazard affair at the Compound. The dining tables were again set up buffet style, and various beings came and went, either loading up a plate and sitting down at a free table or just grabbing a pastry or piece of fruit and going about their unearthly business.
Today when I entered the dining room, I could tell that something was up. Groups of people were talking in low voices, and there was an obvious air of excitement in the room. I saw Elspeth talking to a few other creatures in a corner, and so I went over to see what was going on.
“…unbelievable that such a thing could happen,” one of the group—an incubus—was saying.
Elspeth nodded at the speaker, and then turned to greet me. She introduced me to the others, all of whom were Compound servants.
“What’s going on?” I asked, curiously.
Elspeth shook her head, as if in disbelief, looking at me with wide eyes. “Oh, Jane, I don’t even know where to begin,” she said. When she didn’t continue, I realized she was serious.
“The beginning?” I suggested, patiently.
“Right, yes. ” The dryad took a deep breath. “Well, it turns out there have been a series of murders all over the Territory and in other Territories as well—of halflings. ”
My stomach clenched, but I managed to keep my features neutral.
“None of us were aware this was happening—the Alfar were investigating in secret. But then their investigators were both murdered. One of the investigators was a halfling himself, and the other was a goblin. And when the goblin’s manager went out to assess the situation, she was murdered as well. ” Elspeth looked very upset, and my heart went out to her. Yeah, it’s lucky she wasn’t there, my brain commented sarcastically. The charred goblins were pretty gross.
Elspeth continued, her voice lowering. “Jarl was so concerned about what happened that he sent out the nagas—all nine nestmates. They’ve been scouring the territory for the murderer, even getting access to neighboring territories. ” She said this last bit with particular emphasis, and I got the impression that it was a big deal for cross-territorial cooperation like that. Personally, I was getting quite a good dose of astonishment myself. Ryu was insistent that Jarl would have to know that Jimmu was the murderer, but Elspeth was claiming that Jarl was shocked and appalled by the murders. Either Jarl was playing the Compound or Jimmu was less dependent than everybody thought. I prayed it was the latter.
“This morning Jarl gathered together the heads of the factions here at the Compound and told them what had been happening. He told us about the murders but also the good news—that the murderer has been apprehended. ” My eyes widened. Had his own nestmates discovered Jimmu’s deeds and turned on him?
“That’s why Jimmu left in such a hurry,” she continued. I nearly clapped I was so excited. Ryu and I are safe, and this nightmare is over, I thought. Thank heavens…
“Apparently Jimmu’s nestmates discovered the true identity of the killer—a human—and Jimmu was sent to exact justice. ”
Oh shit balls, I thought. That was not how I wanted Elspeth’s story to end.
“How could a human kill two goblins?” the incubus was asking, his mustache waving hello at me. I was in such shock I barely wanted to make out with him when he said it.
The ifrit shrugged, her halo of fire swooping dangerously close to my own hair. I backed away a step. “We all have our vulnerabilities,” she said. “Remember the giants. ” The various beings nodded their heads somberly and I got the impression that particular quotation was the supernatural version of “Remember the Alamo. ”
“Oh, well,” the incubus said, breaking the mood. “At least it means we get to have a party. ” He turned to beam his sex rays at me. “Did you bring your party clothes?” he asked. I mumbled something inarticulate, moving toward him powerlessly, but luckily Elspeth came to my aid.
“Let’s take you to the pool, Jane,” she said, glaring at the incubus.
“Pool, yes, mmm,” I burbled, as she steered my reluctant little legs away and out toward the courtyard.
Being Elspeth, she had the good sense to grab some fruit, pastries, and coffee on the way out. Once I’d recovered from the incubus juju I gave her a hand, sticking the bananas in the waistband of my jeans like pistols and taking the coffees.
We ate in the grotto. I would have preferred to have sat in an outhouse, but since I didn’t want to get into why I was no longer a big fan of the pool, I kept mum. Elspeth was telling me about the festivities planned for that night, and even though the majority of my mind was wrapped up with mulling over what she’d meant when she said that Jimmu was expected to “exact justice” for the murders, there was still a small part of my brain that was worried about what I was going to wear.
You are such a girl, I criticized myself, wearily.
And you are Captain Obvious,
my brain replied, irritatingly smug.
When I’d finished eating, I stuck a finger into the pool a couple of times, still listening to Elspeth babble. Then I went back to where she was sitting and we had a good chat. She wanted to know how I’d met Ryu, but I didn’t want to inform her that either of us had anything to do with the halfling murders. So, I just told her that we’d met in the course of one of his investigations, but didn’t specify which. She didn’t press the issue; she just wanted to get to the juicy bits about how we got together and stuff. I felt like a bit of a skank, admitting that we’d barely known each other before everything het up, but she seemed to think it was all very romantic. And sitting there, telling her about our first date, and the night at the beach with the picnic and stuff, I realized it was pretty damned sexy.
Even if you are still a hootchie, my virtue asserted.
You shut your pie hole, the libido warned.
I asked Elspeth about her life at the Compound and she told me everything, and I mean everything. She was a tree, after all, and she had very little appreciation for what humans might find interesting. Or even half-humans, at that, I thought. But despite her inability to edit, Elspeth’s stories were fascinating. After all, I still knew so little about this world that even hearing about their arguments over whether the nahuals who preferred cat shapes should be given litter boxes or expected to use the toilets “like everybody else” was still informative. I kept thinking about Jonathan Swift’s famous poem about how “Celia, Celia, Celia shits!” in which the narrator discovers proof that the love of his life—the angelic Celia—goes to the bathroom just like everybody else. In movies or books, you never saw Dracula leave off chasing the virginal heroine to have a wee. But here I was learning that, just like Celia, the supernatural community does—indeed—shit. I found it strangely comforting.
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