by Siobhan Muir
I opened my mouth to refute his words but I couldn’t find an argument that didn’t sound petulant.
“Exactly. You weren’t honest with him, either. I figure that makes you both even.” Torch leaned forward, his eyes sparkling. “But he tried to tell you, and if I had to guess, I’d say Loki did his best to draw this out as long as possible. You know the kick he gets out of watching people squirm emotionally. It’s like an aphrodisiac to him.”
I thought back to all the times Coop tried to tell me something and sure enough, Loki was there, distracting, insisting on something else to shift my focus. I raised my gaze to the dragon shifter sitting beside me.
“Did he send you that morning when we went to the warehouse?”
Torch nodded. “Yup. He didn’t want to give Coop a chance to say anything that would derail you from what needed to be done.”
“That unbelievable bastard.”
Torch snorted. “Count on it.”
I dropped my head into my hands and closed my eyes. Torch was right. Neither Coop nor I had been honest with each other. At least he’d had a legitimate reason to hide the truth. I was just scared. Scared he wouldn’t want the embodiment of the energy of consequence. And since we’re being honest, who would really want to be involved with a person who judged your every action in the grand scheme of things? It didn’t matter that I didn’t do it on purpose.
“Look, I’ve lived a long time and I’ve watched the humans. They might be short-lived, destructive, and stupid as hell sometimes, but they learn from their mistakes far faster than the Elder Races ever do and they often love more fiercely. He knows he screwed up and I’d lay odds that he’s beating himself up over it. Give him a chance and talk to him.”
“I don’t know what to tell him.” I met Torch’s gaze miserably. “I’m scared.”
He laughed, a deep rumbling sound that would be really creepy in other circumstances. Like a deep shadowed cave in the earth.
“Good. That means you’re on the right track. Love wouldn’t be worth a damn if it didn’t scare you once in a while.” He grasped my hand and squeezed gently. “Give yourself time to get your shit together, and for the Goddess’s sake, take a shower.”
I swiped at him and he grinned momentarily before he sobered. “But don’t wait too long. I got the feeling he’s gonna need you sooner rather than later.” He rose from the chair, giving me a solemn look.
I raised an eyebrow at his enigmatic response. “Can you see the future, Torch?”
“Not as often as I’d like.” He winked and sauntered out of the clubhouse.
I watched him leave, going over everything he’d said. Coop hadn’t been completely honest with me, but he didn’t have the monopoly on half-truths either. The question became, was I too scared to take the chance on him seeing past my otherness? Or would I step up and grasp the courage humans seemed to carry with them when it came to love?
The answer was easy. I wanted Coop and I wanted to try, and as far as honesty was concerned, we were on equal footing. I stood up and took my plate to the dish bin before heading back to my cabin, my head up and my mind clear. I’d take the day to figure out how to approach the problem with Coop and I’d go looking for him the next day. I needed a shower, clean clothes, and a plan.
And after I got him back, I’d be talking with Loki. He owed me, big time, and God of Mischief or not, he’d have to pay up. For the first time in days, I grinned.
****
Karma
I woke with a start, trying to get my bearings before I did anything drastic. My heart pounded in my chest and I panted as if I’d been running. Something had been chasing me in my dreams and I jerked awake just before it caught me.
I frowned as I sat up, taking in my bedroom. Everything sat quiet and serene. But the panic in my heart was real. Except nothing was happening where I sat in my bed. I shot a look out the window and the half moon cast wan light over the ground. I couldn’t see the actual satellite from my window, but the ground glowed with its silvery light. Again, everything sat silent and calm.
Something’s wrong.
I knew it in my gut just as clearly as I knew when someone needed their cosmic bill collected. I shook my head, trying to ferret out the feelings and emotions associated with my gut instinct, but nothing came to me. I frowned. Must have been a nightmare.
Except I never had nightmares. As the physical manifestation of karma, my dreams weren’t full of fear. They always consisted of setting things right and the satisfaction that came with it. I glanced at the bed and realized I lay on one side of it, as if making room for the person who wasn’t there.
Coop.
Sorrow and pain rose in my chest, but they weren’t as sharp as they’d been the last few days. Thank the Goddess for Torch. Who knew a dragon could be so wise in the ways of the heart? Especially since he’s single. Maybe he’d made similar mistakes. I wasn’t sure how old Torch was, but he was old enough to shift shape. I’d heard dragons had to be five hundred to do that.
Taking a deep breath to calm my heartbeat, I lay back and closed my eyes, trying to coax my stressed body back into relaxation. It had gotten harder and harder to do since Coop left. I’m gonna fix that first thing tomorrow. Pretty words for sure, but I didn’t know if I’d have the courage to do it in the daylight.
I settled finally and let my mind go back into that twilight area between waking and sleeping. At first, everything swirled around my awareness and I swirled with it, not focused on anything. But the eddies of mist took shape and I found myself standing in the shadow cast by a building in an industrial part of a city. The walls had graffiti in large light-colored loops that were vaguely reflected in the puddles of the alley floor. Dumpsters created a strange obstacle course into the darkness and small mammals—probably rats—scurried away from any light presented.
Like the set of headlights on the vehicle at the mouth of the alley.
Rhythmic thumps came from behind one of the Dumpsters along with grunts and moans of pain. At first, I just listened to them, but after a while I could feel the impacts of each blow and pain filtered into my awareness. Agony seared through the ribs on my right side and my left hand screamed with pain at each beat of my frantic heart. My face had grown numb from all the blows it had sustained and one eye had swollen shut.
What the actual fuck?
“All right, Kinsley. That’s enough.”
The beating stopped and from my place in the shadows I saw a cop with a nightstick step away from the Dumpster. It took me a few moments to realize Officer Kinsley had been beating someone on the ground. The man who’d spoken shifted in front of one headlight, his silhouette a stark, black smear against the light. He wore a fedora hat and actually held a walking cane. Now all he needs are black-sided spats and he’s got the whole Chicago Mafioso thing going.
Fedora Guy tilted his head to take in the body on the ground. “So, Marshal DeVille, have I gotten your attention now?”
Marshal DeVille? My blood chilled and my gut clamped into a painful spasm. I had to get closer to see if the name fit the man I knew.
“F-f-fuck off.” I recognized the voice, but it sounded haggard, tired, and resigned.
Fedora Guy shook his head, tsking with disappointment. “Not the best response, Marshal. Kinsley?”
The uniform moved in and dealt several more blows, DeVille moaning with each impact. I felt them on my own body and bit back the screams as pain swelled in a crescendo. At last, Kinsley stopped and stepped back once more. I crept closer, trying to get a better view, but my chest tightened into immobility, the pain making it hard to breathe.
“Now then.” Fedora Guy leaned forward on his cane. “I’ll say this again. Have I gotten your undivided attention, Marshal?”
“Y-y-yeah.” Anger remained in DeVille’s voice, but it had been banked.
“Very good.” Fedora Guy nodded and straightened before he tilted his head. “You know, all that blood looks good on you. It really brings out your eyes. Of cou
rse, you were much prettier before Kinsley got to you, but such is life.” He shrugged. “So here’s the deal. You need to stop looking into Backlog. Don’t dig into us or our money. Don’t talk to anyone about it. Don’t even mention it to your pretty, darkie girlfriend.”
Coop made a sound in the back of his throat and Fedora Guy nodded.
“Oh yeah, we know who she is and how to get to her, so keep that in mind.” Fedora Guy motioned to Kinsley. “Give him back his gun.”
The uniform set the gun on the ground near Coop, but far enough away that he couldn’t get to it quickly.
“This is how it’s all gonna play out. You forget about the Backlog. Stop researching where the money goes or who the players are, and you go back to your life as Marshal Cooper DeVille.” Fedora Guy waved at someone else and the engine of the car started, the headlights flickering with ignition. “If you don’t, we’ll come back to finish the job we started tonight. And we’ll make sure your girlfriend is collateral damage. Are we clear?”
“Y-y-you s-s-stay away f-f-from her or I’ll f-f-fuckin’ kill you.”
Officer Kinsley barked an ugly laugh. “You hear that, boss? He’s the big man givin’ orders now.” He aimed a kick at Coop and I marked him for death in that moment.
“Hey, Marshal DeVille, the choice is yours. Your girlfriend won’t know a thing if you let this all go. Simple as that.” Kinsley slammed his boot into Coop’s side and I growled. “Stay away from Backlog. Got me?”
Oh, I got him. They’d just pissed off karma and I’d go Full Metal Bitch on their asses. From what I could tell, all the men surrounding Fedora Guy, him included, were due for some retribution. But Fedora Guy and Officer Kinsley had harmed my true mate, and while Coop and I had some issues to work out, no one harmed my mate and lived to tell about it. Fedora Guy and his crew were tagged for death. I’d see to it personally.
Once the car had backed out of the alley, I crept to the Dumpster and crouched beside my downed mate. From the wheezing in his chest, they’d broken some of his ribs and done damage to his lungs. Shit-oh-dear, he can’t breathe. I reached out to touch his forehead and damn near jumped when my skin touched his. Holy shit, I’m really here now.
“K-K-Karma?” Coop opened his one good eye, blinking rapidly. “Is that you?”
“Yeah, Coop, I’m here.” I tried to give him a warm smile.
“I’m so sorry, Ma’am.”
My heart broke at the anguished words and at his use of my honorable title. “It’s all right.”
“No, Ma’am. I wasn’t honest enough for you and I’ve lost you because of it.” He blinked and a tear slid down his cheek. “It doesn’t matter anyway. I can’t go back to you or Backlog will hurt you, and that’s worse than not having your trust. Can’t let them hurt you. Love you.”
He closed his eye as he lost consciousness and panic surged in my gut. If he stayed out there without help, he’d die. Humans weren’t as tough as the Elder Races, and they didn’t heal as fast.
“Coop? Coop. Stay with me. Come on, sweet man. Open your eyes.”
But he didn’t move again and his breathing sounded watery. Oh fuck. I glanced around the alley, trying to figure out where in the world he’d been beaten. I rose and took a few steps away from his body, hoping I wouldn’t lose whatever connection that made this possible.
The world of the alley remained stable as I moved closer to the cross street ahead. I kept glancing back to be sure I hadn’t lost Coop, but I managed to reach the road and glanced around. It was late so very few cars moved about. I tried to focus on landmarks to tell me where he was, but the buildings were too high and too close together.
Shit. Shit. Shit.
What could I do? I didn’t want to leave Coop and it was getting harder and harder to breathe. I moved back down the alley to his side and looked him over. If he didn’t get help soon, it wouldn’t matter if Backlog threatened to hurt me. I dropped to my knees and pawed through his pockets, trying to be careful while I searched for his phone. The face was spiderwebbed with cracks, but it powered up and let me dial 911.
“Nine one one, what’s your emergency?” The man on the other end sounded calm.
“Oh my gosh, I just found this guy on the ground here and he’s been beaten pretty bad. He’s not breathing too good.” Neither was I, but that helped with my scared young woman persona.
“Stay calm, ma’am. Where are you located?”
“I-I don’t know. I went for a walk and got all turned around.” I glanced at the Dumpster beside me and found the street name and number on the side. “I think he’s in the alley behind 1455 W. Prospect Boulevard.”
“Okay, I’m alerting the Emergency Services nearest you. They should be there in just under five minutes. Stay on the line with me, okay?”
“Can’t you just track the phone or something with the GPS thingy?”
To his credit, he didn’t laugh. “Yes, ma’am, that helps us narrow it down. But I need you to stay on the line until the police get there. Can I have your name please?”
“Carmen.” I injected more fear into my voice as Coop’s wheezing got worse. “Please hurry. He’s having trouble breathing and it sounds awful.”
“EMS is on the way and say they are about two minutes out. You should be able to hear the sirens soon.”
Yeah, I could hear them. I’d have to drop the phone and fade out soon, but I didn’t want to leave Coop’s side. The idea that he could die when I wasn’t looking made me want to throw up. But I couldn’t stay. I wasn’t sure I was even really there anyway.
I carefully set the phone down in his hand and leaned close to him, hoping the 911-worker couldn’t hear me.
“Hang on, Coop. Help’s on the way and I want to see you again. You hear me? I need to talk to you so you hang on until I can. This is an order from your Madam. You will live until we can talk.”
“Yes, Ma’am.”
I blinked, looking at his lips, but they hadn’t moved. But I swore he’d answered me. I had to take solace in that as the flashing red and blue lights of the ambulance and police cars filled the alley. I stood and hurried back the way I’d come, letting go of my physical essence just as the headlights of the ambulance illuminated the alley. I looked back and met the gaze of the lead EMT before I faded back to my bedroom. He called out but the silence of my cabin cut off the sound.
I drew my knees up to my chest and dropped my head on them, hoping they’d arrived in time. Come on, Coop. Hang in there just a little longer. I hoped the Goddess heard my prayer because I had planning to get done. Fedora Guy and Officer Kinsley had some karmic debts to pay.
Chapter Nineteen
Cooper
Everything hurt. Even my hair and my fingernails.
Why the hell does everything hurt?
I focused my mind to bring back the last thing I remembered. I’d left the Concrete Angels’ compound and made it home. I noticed the silver Cruze was back out on the road in front of my apartment but I didn’t worry about it. I went back to my usual routine of going to work in the Marshals’ Denver office and tried to forget about Karma.
I snorted and a spike of pain when through my chest. Fuck, I know heartbreak is bad, but this seems extreme. I wasn’t going to forget about her anytime soon.
I opened my eyes and looked around, listening to the soft beeping coming from my right. A heart monitor chirped along steadily as I took in the details of the room. It looks like a hospital. A pale blue blanket covered me from the chest down and the IV in my elbow ran to a saline bag hanging from the rack to my left. I was alone although there was another bed in the room.
How the hell did I get here?
I frowned. I’d gone to work and everything seemed normal, but I kept getting the feeling I was being watched. My partner, Anna Fitzsimmons, had been more reserved than before, but I figured it was because I’d left her with our caseload. I couldn’t tell if she was Backlog or not, but it didn’t matter because she seemed to avoid me. Maybe she’s avoiding Backlog,
too.
But four days after I’d come back, I got jumped on my way out to my car. Two guys threw a bag over my head and shoved me in the back of a police car. I could smell the piss, sweat, puke, and nervous desperation of the suspect seats. Plus the cold weight of the handcuffs clinched it.
I didn’t remember how long we drove and no one talked. But when we stopped, they dragged me out into an alley and ripped off the hood. There were five guys and the big boss in a fedora, holding a walking cane. I recognized a couple of the guys from the names on Eisenburg’s list in Fort Collins PD uniforms, but the big boss looked like a businessman straight out of Chicago. Yeah, well, I’m probably not going to be able to nail him for tax evasion.
“Do you know who I am, Marshal DeVille?” Damn, he even had a Chicago accent.
I’d shaken my head.
“My name’s Daniel Ainsworth and I’m the Police Commissioner for Fort Collins. I understand you’ve been poking around in things you shouldn’t. Care to explain yourself?”
I’d given him my best blank look. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
His mouth had flattened into a thin line. “I don’t have time to play games, DeVille. We need you to stop snooping in business that isn’t yours.”
“Uh, I’m pretty sure you’ve got the wrong guy. I really don’t know what you’re talking about. Seriously.”
Ainsworth had sighed. “Oh, DeVille. I’m gonna have to get your attention, then. Officer Kinsley, jog his memory.”
I didn’t remember much after that except impacts and pain, but I did recall Ainsworth and Kinsley threatening to hurt Karma if I kept up with my investigation, and I think I’d threatened them right back, but my memory grew hazy.
Then Karma had been there. I frowned and closed my eyes. That doesn’t make any sense. Karma wouldn’t come near me with a ten-foot pole. Why the hell did I think she was there? But I could see her, her face creased with worry as she leaned over me. I wanted to tell her I loved her, that I was so sorry for betraying her trust, for not being honest with her. But I couldn’t get the words out and she wasn’t there anyway.