Slowly, like she’s reserving the right to change her mind at any minute, she places her small hand in mine and my entire body warms at her touch. Until she turns to talk to her date again.
“I’ll be right back,” she says kindly.
As she walks past me to the dance floor, I turn and give him my best glare. “No, she won’t.” Hurrying to catch up, I place my hand at the small of her exposed back and guide us to an open spot on the dance floor, which is basically the whole thing, since apparently no one knows how to dance to this beat either.
No matter. I don’t care if the powers that be decide to play this classical stuff or crank up the heavy metal. I’m still going to hold Donna close and talk to her alone for the first time in weeks.
Plus, I’m really good at head banging, so that’s not off the table just yet.
“I’m glad you decided to come.” Donna holds her right hand in my left and wraps her other arm around my neck, my free hand resting on her lower back. Her exposed lower back. She absentmindedly begins playing with the short hairs near my collar and suddenly I’m grateful to be wearing this getup. It’s hiding the goosebumps that have raised all over my body. “Are you having fun?”
“The flan was amazing.”
She smiles and quirks one eyebrow up. “That’s the only thing you’ve enjoyed about being here?”
“What can I say? I’m a simple guy. Custard makes me happy.”
Donna laughs and between the sound and her fingers in my hair, I’m not sure I’m breathing normally anymore. It’s this weird visceral reaction I have to her. It’s so much more intense than I have with my friends, and again, I’m praying I haven’t been friend-zoned.
Suddenly her facial expression changes to one of disappointment. “I’m really sorry you didn’t win.”
“Don’t be. My mother has been trying to get me to stop talking for years and they’re trying to give me an award for it. They just undid years of parenting and don’t even know it. To me, that’s the gift that keeps on giving.”
Donna smacks my arm lightly, laughing all the while. “You’re a mess. I’m trying to be supportive and console you.”
I shrug because I honestly can’t understand why everyone is trying so hard to make me feel better when I don’t feel bad at all. “It’s not about winning for me, though. Sometimes I can just do something because I like it. If other people don’t see the value in it, too bad. I did.”
“That’s a really mature way of thinking about it.” She lets go of my hand and clasps both of hers behind my neck, pulling us closer and making me shift until my arms are wrapped around her waist. “I need to remember that before I read any of the reviews on my new sweet romance.”
“Yeah, you should. Even if no one else thinks it’s amazing, it doesn’t take away from your value or your enjoyment of bringing the story to life. That’s the most important part.”
“See, that attitude right there is why you should have won. I must demand a recount.” Her conviction is adorable.
“It won’t make a difference. I hear the winner is one of the board member’s nephews.”
Her eyes widen at my remark. “Really?”
“No, but that’s how rumors start. We could totally make it happen,” I say with a conspiratorial grin.
She throws her head back and releases a laugh so hard, it echoes around the room. It’s official, my new goal in life is to make that belly laugh happen again. And frequently.
“I’m going leave that one to you.” She pulls away and I immediately miss the feeling of her body next to mine. “I’ll be right back. I drank one too many glasses of wine during the ceremony and I’ve been waiting for it to be over for a while.”
“Okay,” I say as she walks away. “I’ll be right here. Waiting.”
She turns to look at me over her shoulder and winks at me, a playful smirk making her full lips quirk up just a bit.
Oh yeah. Matthew doesn’t stand a chance.
Chapter 27
Donna
That man. I have no idea what it is about Todd, but he makes me giddy and nervous like a school girl. I’ve missed him over the last few weeks. Sure, we talk regularly and we’ve video chatted more than once. The days I didn’t talk to him, the days he wasn’t there to make me laugh or to remind me I am going to be okay taking a risk with this next release, those were hard on me. It amazes me how easily I’ve become dependent on him and his friendship.
Friendship. He’s my best friend.
I wasn’t lying when I said I had to use the restroom. Sure, I needed a break from being so close to him. The desire I feel for him has me all out of sorts. There’s always been a certain connection, physical and otherwise, between us almost since the day in the airport lounge, but after our weekend in Phoenix everything changed. The connection we’ve shared became a power chord of lust. Feelings run through my veins and having my fingers in his hair, my chest against his with our hearts beating in tandem, it’s almost too much.
That’s why I excused myself. I need a breather. I need to splash some cold water on my wrists, take ten cleansing breaths, and toss a handful of mints in my mouth. A girl can never be too prepared.
Smiling and waving to colleagues as I walk through the room offers me a little extra time in my reprieve of one-on-one time with Todd, for that I’m grateful. As I round the corner to the hallway to the restroom, I see a familiar face and smile.
“Carrie!” I shout as I greet her with a huge hug. “What are you doing here?”
“Donna, ohmygod. This is so crazy and amazing. I won a contest on social media and am here with Pippa Worthington.” Her squeal as she says Pippa’s name almost shatters my eardrum, but her enthusiasm makes it all worthwhile. And who wouldn’t be ecstatic? Pippa came out of obscurity as a fan-fiction author and hit the big time with her fantasy series about a girl who never knew she was part fae. The first cinematic installment came out a few months ago and is being eyed as the biggest blockbuster of the year.
“That’s so great. Take advantage of it. This is a great opportunity to get some exposure for your blog.”
Her eyes light up at the thought. “I know. As a reader I’m trying not to fangirl. But as a blogger, I really want to make a good impression, you know? I want to be included on her list of go-to reviewers.”
“She’d be a fool not to see you that way. You’re one of the most supportive people I know.”
“That’s so sweet of you to say. I just want to tell people about books. That’s it. I don’t want to be part of any drama. The most heated debates I want to have are about which book boyfriend is the best.”
“You do a really good job of staying positive. Even when some of us aren’t quite on top of things. Like me. I know I owe you an email. I’ve been drowning in all this release promo stuff.”
Carrie waves her hands dismissively and says, “I’m always willing to help, you know that. So,” she whispers, “want to repay the favor?”
Confused I tilt my head waiting for her to continue. “Will you introduce me to Hawk Weaver? I know he’s here with Adeline Snow and you’re like besties or something. Please? Will you introduce me?”
Taken aback by her question, it takes me a minute to adjust my thinking from Todd to Hawk. “Oh, sure. Let me ask him first. He’s pretty private when it comes to this kind of stuff.” Really, I need to make sure he puts on a show for Carrie as Hawk Weaver.
“Yay! Okay, I’m probably going to get a glass of champagne at the bar. Also, I know this is kind of a weird request, but can you ask him to just talk to me with my back to him? I just want to hear his voice in person, I don’t want a face. I feel like it will take away from the mystery.”
Laughing, I nod my head in response. “So you didn’t see him sitting at Adeline’s table?”
She shakes her head. “From where I was sitting, I could only see the back of his head. Every time he would turn to talk to someone, I’d close my eyes.”
Patting her arm, I can’t help but laugh agai
n. “I promise to come find you when I’m done, and I’ll make sure he doesn’t turn around.”
Her eyes light up and she claps her hands. “Oh thank you. This night is getting better and better. Now I’m going to get liquored up. It makes his voice even better.” All I can think as she walks away is that Todd will probably laugh hysterically when I tell him how excited she is to meet Hawk Weaver. And then he’ll do some weird facial yoga before doing exactly what she asks and making her day.
Opening the door to the restroom, I quickly handle my business and wash my hands before standing in front of the mirror and confirming all my parts are sitting in this dress as they should be. I knew the moment I saw this dress online I had to own it. A deep red, the silky fabric lays just right on my ivory skin. The thin straps with gold accents crisscross down my back to meet the plunging back at my waist. It’s risqué but still classy and on point with my brand. Minimal accessories and loose waves in my hair are the perfect complement to the dress.
As I’m checking the back of the dress to make sure the straps are in place, I overhear two girls talking over the stalls. While most of the attendees at this event are authors, narrators, and publishers, there are a few readers in attendance from giveaways and sweepstakes. By the gushing these two are doing about the hot male model in attendance, that would be Matthew, I assume they’re readers.
When they exit their stalls still chatting, I step up to the sink and wash my hands one more time before reaching for a paper towel, keeping my face turned away so they don’t recognize me. Not that they necessarily would, but I have too much on my mind right now to be “on.”
“I still can’t believe we’re here. It’s so cool,” the girl in a black sheath dress says to her friend.
“Totally cool. Sucks that my dreams have been shattered, though.”
The response catches my attention, so I linger a little longer, drying my hands. Why would her dreams be shattered from attending this event? If I were a reader, or specifically, an audio listener I’d be freaking out.
“I still don’t think he’s too unfortunate looking. I mean, he’s like as old as my dad but still not too bad.”
Scoffing, black dress girl says, “He’s not even close to your dad’s age, but yeah. He ruined my fantasy. I imagined Hawk Weaver to be like tall and rugged. Long hair pulled into a man bun . . . NO!” Her shout startles me and I jump. “No. Not long hair. I thought he’d have perfectly styled hair, a five o’clock shadow that I’d absolutely pet like a puppy and piercing green eyes. Why doesn’t he have green eyes? And his hair is not pet-able. Like at all. He’s a total let down.”
My rage is real. A pounding in my ears drowns out the rest of what they’re saying. Words of disappointment over a man they don’t know. A man who is kind and giving. He cares for more people than they’ll ever know in their lives. How dare they not appreciate the man he is.
Taking a deep breath, I contemplate my next move. I should open the door and walk out. I should not say anything to these young girls. They don’t realize who they’re talking about. They aren’t considering the fact that Todd, er Hawk, is a person—a real person. The same could be said for the authors in this room. We are more than they see online or that they read on our bios.
Clearing my throat, I wait for them to turn their attention to me. They don’t. They’re still chattering away about the dessert when I say, “Excuse me, ladies.” Finally ceasing the debate on whether the dessert tonight was better than the one they normally get at their favorite Tex-Mex restaurant, they turn to face me.
“Ladies, I couldn’t help but overhear you speaking of Hawk Weaver.”
“Oh,” black dress girl says. Yeah, oh.
“I just wanted to tell you that the man you are speaking of is wonderful. He is gracious, kind, and supportive of everyone in his life. He gives with his whole heart. When he laughs, it’s like you can’t help but join him. Quips and one-liners are his go-to response for everything, and it will make your darkest day light. And his smile. Girls, if you are ever lucky enough to have a man smile at you like he—” I stop and clear the lump forming in my throat. “Well, I hope you experience something as wonderful as his smile. So when you feel disappointed that maybe his look isn’t exactly what you thought, or his weird pineapple shirt isn’t what you ever thought your date would wear to lunch, remember how he makes you feel. How his smile makes you feel.”
“Kelly, it’s happening.”
“Maggie, it is so happening.”
I have no idea what it is happening, but I’m happy to have a name to replace “black dress girl.” And, how fitting that her name is Kelly and she totally looks like Jennie Garth. Random.
“What is happening?” I ask both them and myself. Wiping my suddenly damp cheeks I wait for them to answer.
“It’s that moment like in a book when the heroine realizes she’s fallen in love.”
Scrunching my face in confusion, I tilt my head as I try to process her words.
Smiling wide, Maggie, formerly known as “not black dress girl,” says, “And it’s when she goes to the hero, and he knows he’s already fallen.” Turning to Kelly she adds, “I knew these books weren’t just fiction. This is why I’m holding out.”
I don’t fully process the last part of their conversation. I’m too busy realizing that if their assessment of this situation is true then I’m the heroine and Todd is the hero.
Todd is the hero.
I love Todd.
“Ohmygod, I love Todd!” I shout and turn to run from the restroom as I hear the girls says in unison, “Who is Todd?”
Rushing out the restroom, I run smack into a brick wall of man. Looking up, I see a smiling Matthew staring down at me.
“Girl, you left me all alone. Where have you been?”
Shit. Matthew is my date. I brought a date.
“I’m so sorry. I was dancing and then the not Jennie Garth girl was talking about heroes, and I realized it’s Todd.” It’s like diarrhea of the mouth. I can’t stop the words from spilling and realize I’m making next to no sense when Matthew starts laughing.
“Were you taking shots in the restroom? Are you on something?”
“What? No. I’m not on anything.” Torn, I know I need to find Todd, but I also brought Matthew here and the least I can do is spend a little more time with him. “I’m sorry. I just really need to find someone.”
“The guy you were dancing with?” Nodding, I look around his body toward the ballroom. Did they let in people off the street? Where did all these people come from?
“I think he left?”
“What?” I shout. “He left? No no no, he couldn’t have left.”
Shrugging, Matthew motions for me to follow him back to the ballroom. The party is in full effect, people are dancing, and I hear a lot of laugher wafting around us. Peering over people as best I can, I don’t see Todd or Aggi anywhere. Spotting Carrie, I grab Matthew’s hand and hightail it across the room to where she stands.
“Carrie!”
She turns to face me, a huge smile on her face. A smile that quickly fades when she sees Matthew. That is the strangest reaction to a male model I’ve ever seen. Not having time to assess her reaction, I say, “Have you seen To—I mean, Hawk?”
“Donna, how would I see Hawk? I don’t know what he looks like.” Oh, that’s right.
“Right. Okay, have you seen Adeline? Spencer? I need to speak to them.”
“Oh yeah, I saw them leave about five minutes ago. I heard them say something about warm sushi for lunch and then their friend rushed them out of here. They looked kind of green. I hope it’s not food poisoning.”
Dammit to hell, he left.
This really is like one of my books. Just when the heroine figures out she’s in love with the hero, he blows out of town. Or in this case, an awards ceremony.
Chapter 28
Todd
I don’t know when Aggi will learn that part of my charm is the ability to spot rancid seafood from a mile aw
ay. Maybe it’s because I catch the beginnings of a popular cooking show at the tail end of The Voice sometimes. Maybe it’s because I dated a girl who was in culinary school at one point. Maybe it’s from my own bad experience with a fusion sushi roll. However it happened, when the words “I’m pretty sure that’s not fresh salmon” come out of my mouth, the best course of action is to put down the chopsticks.
Did Aggi and Spencer do that? No. No they did not.
“You have to go. You have to, Spencer,” Aggi mumbles behind her hand that is currently holding her mouth.
She’s turning greener by the minute and I’m pretty sure she’s about to blow. Literally. Turning my attention to my best friend, I point the bathroom of her suite. “Go, Agnes. Strip that dress and do not blow a chunk out here.” Her eyes widen, and she runs toward the bathroom. She attempts to slam the door shut but instead, it only closes half-way.
“Get him out, Todd!”
Pivoting, I look at Spencer and assess him. He’s looking gray but not nearly as sickly as Aggi. “Dude, you have to go. Here, take my card. Go to my room, fourteen eighty-one, let the woman pray to the porcelain gods in peace.”
“Babe, why does Todd get to stay and help you? Let me help you, I really feel okay. Well except all the talk of puke. That’s kind of doing a number on me.” He grabs his stomach and lets out a rancid belch. I never thought I’d be able to say I was the sexiest one in the room when Spencer was around, but today appears to be that day.
“Todd gets to stay because he does not want to give me orgasms and spend quality time in my business. You know, my girl business. Now . . . oh no!” A loud squeal comes from the bathroom followed by, “Oh no.”
I know that squeal and quickly usher Spencer from the room. The expression on his face tells me exactly how much he loves my best friend. Leaving her is killing him, but I’ve seen Aggi after too much tequila on spring break. This is not going to end well. No words are exchanged as I push him out the door. While she’s in the bathroom saying “no” repeatedly, I pick up the phone and dial room service. I request a plate of crackers, fizzy soda, and a banana.
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