by Shayla Black
“We’re not gay, either,” a quiet one on the other side of the aisle put in, then addressed his bandmates. “This might be the adult subject we’ve been looking to write about to prove we’re not kids anymore.”
A brief pause gave way to a chorus of hmms.
“I could get behind singing about two blokes banging a crumpet,” said the pretty one with the curls again.
The drummer flipped a drumstick in the air and somehow caught it between his middle and ring finger while still twirling it. “It would have our thirteen-year-old fan base losing the plot.”
The quiet one in the corner spoke up again. “Will we be encouraging young girls to have sex with two guys?”
“Oh, don’t get your knickers in a twist, knob head,” the drummer mouthed off. “How do you two keep from knocking cocks when you fuck her? That’s the important question. Because that would throw a spanner in the works.”
“Carefully,” Seth drawled, eliciting a round of laughter.
An hour, another dozen queries, and many sly one-liners later, the band was already writing a song about them. Mr. Cleft Chin had retrieved a guitar and started strumming. The drummer played along on an armrest. The singer belted out lyrics that definitely weren’t fit for radio while the others bandied around song titles, like “Braiding Boners,” “Sharing Kitty,” and Beck and Seth’s personal favorite, “Two Bangers in a Tight Bun.”
Finally, the plane approached the small regional airport in Wisconsin. Anxiety replaced their levity.
What if Heavenly only wanted them for moral support now? What if, tomorrow, she still decided to go her own way?
As the plane cruised down the private runway, Seth pressed his nose to the window, hoping to catch a glimpse of her. Beside him, Beck did the same.
The second Seth saw her standing on the tarmac, looking like liquid gold with the afternoon sun shining off her hair, his heart thundered. Jeans cradled her slender legs and a bulky, cream-colored sweater hugged her breasts. She waved as the plane whizzed past her, wearing a hint of a smile.
“She’s stopped crying…for now,” Beck murmured. “Thank fuck.”
“That bit of all-right is your girl?” the singer asked, which sent his bandmates looking out every available window on that side of the plane.
The brooder with the cleft chin turned to the singer. “Mate, we need to upgrade our groupies.”
Even the serious one let out a long, low wolf whistle.
Before the plane had even stopped, he and Beck unbuckled, grabbed their bags, rose from their seats, and darted for the front.
Impatience chafed. It seemed to take forever before the door opened and the airstairs lowered. With a hasty wave to the band, he and Beck bolted onto the tarmac, toward a sprinting Heavenly.
As they plucked her off the ground, relief swept over her face.
Seth held her close and studied the red-rimmed strain around her eyes. “It’s okay, angel. We’re here now.”
“Thank you.” Her voice trembled as she clutched him tight.
He couldn’t stand it another second. He slanted his lips over hers, drinking in her stress and replacing it with reassurance.
From the plane’s open door behind him, the raucous cheers of the band resounded. Heavenly tensed. “Who are they?”
Beck grumbled the name of the band. “Twerps. But at least they were entertaining.”
Heavenly laughed. “They’re the most up-and-coming boy band right now. But I’m way happier to see you two.”
“Come here, little girl. Show me how happy.” Beck cupped her chin and pressed a hungry kiss to her glossy lips, melting her against his chest.
Seth growled and eased up behind her, wrapping his arms around her and kissing her shoulder.
Behind him, the British boys whooped and hollered. He ignored them while the stairs of the plane retracted and the door slid shut. As the jet started taxiing away, he and Beck each clasped an arm around Heavenly’s waist and headed to the parking lot.
“Which car is your rental?” Beck asked, eying the four possibilities.
“The beige sedan.” Heavenly pointed.
“Give me your keys,” Beck insisted. “I’ll drive. You relax.”
Heavenly’s expression softened and she handed him the fob. It was telling to Seth that such a small offer seemed to lift a weight off her shoulders. He was determined to erase as much of Heavenly’s tension before the day ended as he could.
After stowing their bags in the trunk, they slid her between them on the bench of the front seat. Beck sent her a tender smile. “Which way to the farm?”
She paled. “Y-you want to go there now?”
“Why wait? You have a promise to keep, and it will be twice as hard tomorrow.”
Seth nodded. “We’ll be beside you.”
When she glanced over her shoulder, Seth followed her line of sight to the brushed silver urn strapped in the backseat.
Heavenly sighed but gave him a pensive nod. “Make the next right. The road will take you straight to Bayfield. I’ll show you where to turn after that.”
The closer they rode to her former home, the more tense Heavenly became. Beck squeezed her knee in silent support, as if he, too, sensed her stress ratcheting back up. They tried to soothe her with small talk and tender words, but those would only comfort her so much when she had to say her final goodbye to the person who had most impacted her life.
Before long, they arrived at a small, picturesque town nestled on the shore overlooking Lake Superior. He blinked, then Bayfield was in their rearview mirror. Heavenly directed Beck down a winding collection of two-lane roads.
A few minutes later, they pulled into a long, overgrown brick driveway. In the last good hour of sunlight, Seth got an eyeful of the farm—and had to stifle his shock. It was hardly the impressive gem Abel had beamed about a mere week ago.
Beside him, Heavenly stared gloomily out the windshield. “Dad always took so much pride in this place. Now look at the disaster it’s become.”
Beck killed the engine and took her hand. “I’m sorry. I know that upsets you.”
“Things change, sometimes faster than we imagine, angel. When I left New York to go out west and help Liam, I was only gone three weeks. It shouldn’t have been a big deal. Hell, some people go on vacations that long. But when I went back for Christmas, nothing was the same. My house hadn’t changed, like yours. But my family was different. They’d all coped just fine without me for the first time in over a decade. I was different, too. I was finally ready to move on.”
“That must have been a shock.” Empathy softened her face.
“Yeah, but it made me realize that sometimes, you just can’t go ‘home,’ no matter how much you want to.”
Heavenly sighed. “I’m figuring that out.”
Seth hated how much she was hurting, but if this trip closed off a potential future apart from him and Beck, then he was relieved. He gave her fingers a reassuring squeeze. “Let’s go inside. You can show us around.”
Revisiting happy times might help the healing process. It had been a balm after his dad’s death, for sure.
At Heavenly’s nod, the three of them climbed from the car, trampling the tall grass as they made their way to the front door.
“Every spring, I loved planting flowers along the porch here.” As she pointed to a spot where weeds now choked the ground, tears filled her eyes. “The air used to smell so sweet. During the warm afternoons, if Dad was feeling up to it, we’d sit on the porch and watch the bees gather pollen.”
“I’ll bet he enjoyed that,” Seth mused.
“We both did.” Heavenly sent him and Beck a melancholy smile.
As she led them inside, a dank, musty smell hung in the air. The imprints of her shoes from her earlier visit had disturbed the thick layer of dust on the hardwoods. Empty beer cans, fast-food wrappers, and glass from the broken windows also littered the floor. Cobwebs clung to the corners of the room, framing the neon intrusion of graffiti all o
ver the walls.
A glance at her face told Seth the senseless desecration wrecked her. Rage bubbled, but he tamped it down and focused on Heavenly.
“This your living room?” Beck asked softly.
She nodded. “There was a couch by that stone fireplace, and Dad’s favorite recliner was under that window.” She pointed toward jagged glass edging the frame. “He loved that ratty green eyesore. He almost cried when he realized we couldn’t bring it with us.”
Heavenly led them deeper into the house, sharing stories of her simpler, happier life with Abel. Once in a while, a faraway look shrouded her eyes, as if she privately relived some special fragment of time.
“And this…used to be my bedroom.” She turned in a slow circle, dragging her disbelieving gaze around the space. “It was decorated in yellow-flowered wallpaper then.”
“I know all these changes feel overwhelming.” Seth cupped her shoulders. “But you’re not alone. We’ve got you.”
She sniffed back tears and gave him a valiant nod. “I can’t believe I’m here to spread Dad’s ashes and say goodbye. I always told myself that when I came back, everything would be the way it had been. Of course, I also believed we’d be returning after he’d been cured by the doctors out west, who were supposedly better qualified to deal with his disease.” She scoffed. “What an idiot.”
“You’re not an idiot.” Beck cupped her chin. “People with your dad’s condition don’t usually relapse, and death is rare. You had no way of knowing he would develop another issue entirely.”
“Even flying back here, some part of me was still hoping… But my future isn’t in Bayfield.” She stepped to the window that overlooked the vacant field behind the house. “I see that clearly now.”
“You might not know where you belong yet, but we do.” Seth sipped the fat tear sliding down her cheek.
“Between us, so we can hold you up when you feel fragile, like now.” When a sob escaped her, Beck folded her in his embrace, too. “We’ll carry the weight of your world when it’s too heavy for your shoulders.”
“Guys…”
Seth pressed a finger to her lips. “We know you made promises to your dad. But you’re not the only one. Beck and I vowed we’d take care of you.”
Her eyes widened. “You did?”
“Yes, and we never go back on our word. Later we can talk about what that means.” He caressed her face. “Now, let’s figure out where to spread your dad’s ashes.”
“Under our special tree. That’s what he would have wanted.”
“Show us,” Beck urged.
As she glanced through the window at the sun inching toward the horizon, anguish flashed in her eyes. “It’s time, isn’t it? I can’t put it off anymore.”
Beck shook his head. “We’re here to help you if you need us.”
Together, they led Heavenly from her old bedroom. At the front door, she turned and cast one final glance around the family room. Then she squeezed her eyes shut and pulled the door closed behind her.
The walk to the car was both somber and silent. She retrieved Abel’s urn, clutching it to her chest. The breeze kicked up as they walked side by side, past the brick house nearly swallowed by vegetation, to a large, barren tree flanked by a crumbling, sun-faded barn.
“What’s special about this tree?” Seth coaxed.
“The summer after Mom left, Dad was still able to work the farm. I’d make him lunch every day and bring it out to this tree. We’d sit on an old blanket under the shade.” Heavenly’s voice quivered before she broke down beneath the weight of her memories.
Seth wanted to lift the burden of the urn and spill Abel’s ashes on her behalf. Beck’s clenched fist said he felt the same. But they couldn’t take this from her. She needed to let her father go in her way. So they supported her, Beck rubbing slow circles across her stiff shoulders while Seth softly cupped her nape.
“When I was a kid, he used to push me on the rope swing he hung from one of these big branches. Mom never had time, but Dad was always there for me. When Butter died giving birth to her calf, I ran here. He held me while I cried.”
“Abel was a good, loving father.” Beck gave her shoulder a squeeze.
“He wasn’t just my dad. He was my best friend and confidant. My whole world.” Heavy sobs overtook her again. With tears streaming down her face, she turned to them. “You really think I should leave him in this dead, empty place?”
“If you remember the special times you shared here, Abel does, too. So what if the leaves are gone and home isn’t the way you remember? The memories are still imprinted here.” Beck slapped a hand on the rough bark of the tree. “And here.”
Emotions thickened Seth’s throat as he placed a palm over her heart. “Because every precious moment you spent with your dad will echo in the soil until the end of time.”
Heavenly nodded. “I never thought of it that way.”
Slowly, she unscrewed the top and lifted it from the urn, then knelt at the base of the tree. “Daddy, I love you for all the times you told me I could be anything I wanted as long as I was true to myself.” She tilted the canister and sprinkled out a bit of the gray powder before inching over. “I love you for always having faith in me.” She left another small pile and sidled right again. “I love you for all your smiles, even when you had to put up with me during puberty. You stocked the house for my monthly chocolate binges. I love you for that, too.”
Her voice was soft but reverent. Her resilience made Seth so damn proud.
“I love you for teaching me that life isn’t always fair and that I won’t always get what I want.”
She’d had plenty of proof of that in her short life. If she chose them, he and Beck would do their damnedest to give her everything she’d ever dreamed of.
Heavenly continued around the base of the tree, eulogizing her father from the depths of her soul. When she reached the spot where she’d started, she emptied the rest of the ashes and bowed her head. “I love you…until all the stars fall from the sky.”
As Seth moved in to hold her, Beck did the same. Together, they knelt beside her and surrounded her in their embrace.
After a solemn moment, she stood and turned to them with a grateful smile. “Having you two here gave me the strength I needed and made this so special.” Her throat seemed to close with emotion as she mouthed, “I couldn’t have done it without you two.”
Seth brushed a kiss against her wet cheek. “There’s nowhere on earth we’d rather be than with you.”
Chapter Eight
As Seth pulled away from the farm, Beck cradled Heavenly’s hand in his, relieved that she never glanced back. The sun sank toward the horizon as they drove the ten minutes into town. Her upset filled the silence.
With one hand, Seth drove toward the inn he’d booked for the night. With the other, he took Heavenly’s free hand in his. “How are you holding up?”
“I’m okay.”
But not great. Beck understood. “Do you want to talk about today?”
“Honestly, no. Grief has consumed me for a week. I’m sure it will hit me again later, but right now I need to think about something else.”
“You got it. We’ll talk about whatever you want.”
“How about food, angel?” Seth chimed in. “Take pity on us and tell us you’re hungry.”
She turned to the man with a slip of a smile, her pale hair grazing the curve of her plump breast.
Beck forced himself to focus on the color-splashed skies over Lake Superior so he didn’t wrap himself around her. She needed time, not groping. Besides, she might only want them for temporary moral support. Beck had given Seth shit in Vegas…but since she had reached out to them in need, he felt far less willing to set her free.
“Okay,” she conceded. “I’ll take pity on you and tell you I’m hungry.”
“But you’re not?” Seth looked crushed.
“You wanted me to take pity on you…”
The big guy sighed. “Could you
try to eat? For us?”
Beck sent her a suspicious stare. “What have you eaten today?”
“I had some tea and a piece of toast earlier. It was enough.”
He huffed. “For a bird. Look, neither of us he-men have eaten since breakfast and we’re dying. You need food, too. We’re going to dinner.”
“There’s a restaurant at the inn,” Seth put in. “The website showed a picture of a fat, juicy steak.”
“Good call.” Beck held out a fist, and Seth bumped it.
Heavenly rolled her eyes in silent acquiescence. “I still say there was nothing wrong with my motel, but where are we staying tonight?”
They were spared correcting her when Seth pulled up in front of a big red-and-yellow Victorian with a giant wraparound porch. “Here.”
She went wide-eyed. “Really? I’ve always thought this place was pretty. I was dying to see the inside as a kid.”
After Seth put the car in park, Beck tugged on her hand. “Then let’s go.”
At the top of the walkway, the PI opened the arched wooden doors. Together, they entered a shallow foyer with a gleaming marble penny-tile floor, then passed through a second oak door under a clear transom. The day’s waning rays spilled light onto the pale herringbone hardwoods. Everything about this room looked regal, from the upholstered chairs tucked under the front window to the Federal-style mantel dominating the cheery fireplace and the intricately carved newels towering over the gleaming staircase.
“Wow…” Heavenly turned in a slow circle, drinking everything in, before her eyes gravitated up to the richly stained coffered ceiling. “It’s beautiful.”
Too heavy and traditional for Beck’s taste, but he loved that awe had replaced the sadness in her eyes.
Seth proved he was a man on a mission when he charged toward the middle-aged woman behind a podium. “Evening.”
“Welcome.” She sent him a professional smile. “Are you checking in or here for dinner?”
“Both.”
Within minutes, Seth had procured the key to their suite and gotten directions to the inn’s restaurant. “Ready to eat? I’m fucking starved.”
