by Shayla Black
“But they’ve kept harmony by having a strictly open-door, open-relationship policy, at least from what Hammer has told me,” Beck said. “Raine agrees to give them equal attention, and neither gives the other shit about being with her.”
“That solution sounds most practical and makes the most sense.” Seth peered over at him. “But those guys have a decade of friendship and trust between them.”
He and Beck didn’t.
“Then you and I will have to keep talking until we find what works for us.” Beck shrugged. “Pranks aside, I’d like to think we can be reasonable.”
“I hope so. Can you be with Heavenly without unloading your sadist shit on her? She’s not a masochist. And she doesn’t need to be hurt more.”
The doctor bristled. “For a smart guy, you can be really stupid. Did you ever stop to think that my ‘sadist shit’ might help her process her grief?”
What if the surgeon had a fucking point?
“But since we’re on the subject of no-go activities…” Beck glared his way. “I know your usual speed, and it’s way too rough and filthy.”
“Oh, please. You don’t like it that way, too?”
“Not the point. I can harness my inner beast and keep it vanilla for her sake.” Beck raised a challenging brow. “How about you?”
“Of course.”
Well, he could try.
“Good. Then we’re agreed. I especially don’t want you pulling any of that non-con role-play crap.”
“You understand it’s completely consensual and fully negotiated? I would never do anything against her will.”
“Yeah? An ass whipping is completely consensual and fully negotiated, too.” Beck scrubbed a hand down his face and sighed. “We’re sitting here bickering, but the truth is she might surprise the hell out of us. I was sure shocked last night.”
“Totally.” For a lot of reasons. “The sex, man. Jesus…”
Beck nodded. “Even better than the first time.”
“Exponentially. I never expected her to be half that uninhibited. Tell me you don’t want to find out how far we could take her. Because if you try, I’m going to call you a dirty fucking liar.”
“No, I’m dying to know. And when she expressed an interest in Hammer’s club? Talk about blowing me away.”
“Yep. But she’s fragile now. I’m worried we can’t push her much without breaking her.”
Beck got quiet. “Was last night too much?”
“If you had asked me before we went upstairs, I would have thought so, but…”
They cut short the conversation when Seth pulled the SUV into his apartment complex and parked. When they stepped inside his unit to retrieve his belongings for the move to Beck’s place, he methodically disabled his alarm system.
Beck let loose a soft whistle. “That’s one hell of a security setup.”
“You can never be too—”
“Paranoid?” The doctor grinned.
“Careful,” Seth corrected.
A quick scan of the living room and kitchen assured him that no one had been in the place while he’d been away. There wasn’t much to steal—at least nothing visible—but he had other valuables.
He turned to find Beck, brow furrowed, seeming to take mental inventory of the orderly space with its plush couches and padded chairs in basic black and white. Even the magazines were in a neat row. “What?”
“For a bachelor pad, it’s so…clean. You got a maid or something?”
“I can’t tolerate clutter.”
Beck cut him a sidelong glance. “Clearly.”
“Let’s pack up my shit, huh? We’ll start with the bedroom. Hopefully, it won’t take long to get back to your place.”
“Our place,” Beck corrected.
At least for the time being.
After dragging a couple of garment bags from the closet and tucking some clothes inside, he turned to find Beck studying him with a cocked brow. “Now what?”
“How many damn suits do you own? And do you seriously arrange your clothes by color?”
Seth scowled. “How do you arrange yours?”
“I don’t. Are you OCD, dude? And what the fuck kind of hanger is that?”
“Hey, I like things in order, and I don’t like wrinkled clothes.”
“You know this isn’t normal, right?”
Seth snorted. “And you’re the model of normalcy?”
Beck rolled his eyes but thankfully shut up.
He tossed a couple of suitcases on the bed. “I’ll finish the closet. Would you mind unloading my dresser? And keeping the smart-assed comments to yourself?”
The doctor yanked opened the first drawer. “Really, dude? What the hell?”
He leaned in to see what Beck pointed at. “They’re socks.”
“Yeah, arranged in precise rows. And your boxers are perfectly folded, organized by color, and standing in a…what the hell is this box thing?”
“A lingerie organizer.”
“Okay, this is beyond wrong, man. I know you’ve got that Queer Eye thing when it comes to shopping, but I think your X chromosome has made your Y its bitch.”
“Just because I’m not an animal…” Seth tossed him a glare. “Why don’t you pack the fucking clothes—neatly—and shut your ass up?”
Pinning him with a challenging stare, Beck pulled out the drawer and unceremoniously dumped it all into the suitcase. “How’s that?”
“Asshole.”
“You didn’t even twitch. I’m impressed.”
No, but his inner neat freak wasn’t happy. Seth settled for flipping Beck off before he finished unloading the closet. Once they’d emptied the bedroom, he grabbed his keys and hurried to the walk-in closet down the hall.
“Don’t tell me you’ve got more color-coordinated clothes in there,” Beck called from the doorway.
“No. Something way better.” He unlocked the door, flipped on the light, then stepped back to give the doctor an eyeful.
Beck’s eyes widened. “Holy arsenal, Batman. What the actual fuck?”
The doctor raked his stupefied gaze over the automatic and semiautomatic rifles, multiple shotguns, and numerous handguns lining the walls. Dozens of ammo cans were stacked in organized rows on the floor. “It’s my gun dungeon.”
“Are you prepping for an alien invasion? A zombie apocalypse? Or Armageddon?”
“Don’t be a fucking comedian. There’s nothing wrong with being prepared.”
“A box of condoms is prepared. This? It’s enough to squash most third-world countries and still have ammo to spare.”
“Isn’t it great?” Seth grinned. “Unless you have a problem with me stashing this stuff at your place?”
“No. I’ve always wanted my own illegal weapons cache.”
“Aren’t you funny? How about you stop yapping and help me pack all these in their cases?”
It took a long while, but they finally loaded up the SUV—storing most of his firearms in the hidden locker under the back hatch—before he pulled out of the complex and turned toward the freeway. He’d barely made it up the entrance ramp when the cars began hitting their brakes. Less than a quarter mile down the road, they came to a complete, bumper-to-bumper halt.
“Son of a…” Seth smacked his hand on the wheel. “I fucking hate the traffic here.”
“Like New York is any better?”
“At least when I wanted to get somewhere in Manhattan, I could find a different route. This place… If the freeway is jacked, you’re screwed.”
Beck simply grunted and stared out the window.
“Something else bugging you, man?”
“Besides you being a neat freak?” the surgeon quipped. “I was just thinking now that we’re not fighting anymore, it hasn’t been so bad between us.”
This was one time he didn’t hate Beck being right. They weren’t on solid ground with Heavenly, but if they could persuade her to stay, Seth knew he’d have to work through some of his lingering shit. Until he’d
met these two, he’d never pictured himself in a ménage of any kind, much less a permanent one. Now he hated picturing his life without them.
“Given all the heavy shit we’ve been through these past few days, it’s kind of amazing we didn’t come to blows.”
Beck gave him a sober nod. “Sex aside, do you think we really got through to her last night? She was so damn quiet on the flight home.”
“Was she or did we just fall asleep?”
“That might have had something to do with it.” The doctor sent him a self-deprecating grin.
“She came back with us, which is great, but she still has a shitload of pride.”
“And a long stubborn streak, I know. But I’m hopeful she’s finally learned to ask us for help if she needs it.”
Seth hoped as much, too. “My biggest worry is those promises she made to Abel. They’re the real reason she left us.”
Beck nodded. “We just have to keep reminding her that, above all else, her dad wanted her to be happy.”
“I agree, but we also have to give her some adventure.”
“Hey, I persuaded her to bungee off a bridge with me. It doesn’t get much more adventurous than that.”
“I also heard you made her puke, too,” Seth returned wryly. “But that’s not what I meant.”
“I know. You’re talking about her ‘seeing the world.’ As much as you hate it, man, that means giving her some freedom.”
“I’ve been thinking… I might have a way around that while still addressing her daddy guilt. Wanna hear?”
Chapter Ten
“Are you sure about this?” Heavenly asked with her hair coiled up in hot rollers as she sat in front of the vanity in Beck’s modern master bath, a cache of cosmetics spread across the pristine white quartz counters.
“Absolutely. Why are you worried?”
It was hard to put her finger on the reason. “I had a lot of fun shopping, so please don’t take this the wrong way, but it feels like I should be working or studying or…”
Raine rounded the chair and bent, taking her shoulders in hand. “You’ve had a tough week. It’s spring break, and you just got home from scattering your dad’s ashes. Neither of the guys expects you to do anything industrious today. Go easy on yourself.”
Heavenly dragged in a breath. “It’s a huge change of pace…”
“I’m sure, but if you’re going to live with Beck and Seth as a trial, don’t you want to give yourself plenty of time to see how well you all get along?”
“Of course. I’m taking this very seriously…but your little grin makes me nervous. What are you up to?”
Raine laughed. “Just helping. I admit I have ulterior motives. I want you to stay.”
Heavenly stood and embraced her friend. “I feel so blessed to have you and the guys—heck, everyone I’ve met lately—in my life. You’re the best.”
“Back at you.” Raine winked, but it didn’t cover up her sniffle. “Don’t you tear up, too. It will ruin your makeup. Have you checked your phone lately? Are Beck and Seth on their way back?”
Heavenly plucked the device off the counter and saw a text from Beck. “Yeah, they made their way out of a traffic jam twenty minutes ago.”
“We should hurry, then.” The bubbly brunette sent her a speculative stare as she swept some peachy-pink blush over her cheeks, then set her face with a spray before handing her a tube of lipstick. “Put this on. I hope you understand the power dynamic here.”
“Power dynamic?” Heavenly applied the color to her lips, then blinked at the effect. “This is darker than I’d normally wear…”
Raine turned. “I knew Lollipop Pink would be perfect on you. Keep that. You wear it way better than I do.”
“But...is it too much?”
“Are you kidding? Doesn’t that mouth say fuck me?”
Heavenly pursed her lips together. They were a bright shade between coral and pink. Glossy. Sexy. “I guess, but—”
“Then it’s perfect. Now focus. Power… Beck and Seth told you they’re Doms, right?”
The question didn’t shock Heavenly. Raine probably knew because they all belonged to Hammer’s club.
She nodded. “They kind of explained once, but I’m still not sure what that means.”
Raine raised a dark brow. “Guess there really hasn’t been time for explanations. They’ll fill you in. What I mean is, do you understand your power?”
Heavenly shrugged. “I did some Googling on my phone on the plane this morning. The website I saw said I had the power, but it sounded like the only power I have is to say no.”
“I get why you might think that…until you truly understand. It took me a long, painful while to grasp everything, so I’m going to be a friend and give you some tips.”
“Even if I only stay a couple of months, I think I’ll need them.”
Raine smiled. “First, Beck and Seth will put your needs above theirs, but you have to be real and honest about pretty much everything. Definitely no more lying to them, like, ever again.”
Heavenly winced. “I was just trying to work and take care of my dad and—”
“They know, but none of those reasons matter. What does is that you didn’t tell them about your problems.”
“This again? They were mine.”
“In your head. Not to them.” Raine frowned. “Did they find out about Bazookas and your dad before or after they told you they’re Doms?”
“Before.”
“So they didn’t punish you?”
“No. They threatened to spank me when they heard I’d offered River my, um…”
“Virginity? Yeah.” She snorted. “They were so bent about that, I’m surprised they didn’t do more than threaten.”
“Would they really take me over their knee as a punishment?” But she knew the answer. It made her blush and feel a little hot.
A month ago, she couldn’t imagine getting this personal with anyone. Now, it felt helpful, if still a little unnatural.
“In a heartbeat. And for lots of reasons other than lying, so listen up. Don’t ever say you’re fine if you’re not.”
“Okay. What else?”
“Don’t throw a hissy. Let me tell you from personal experience, that’s a big no. They’ll want calm, effective communication. And don’t say negative things about yourself. You can say you feel bloated. You can’t say you’re a fat cow.” The pregnant woman rubbed her swelling belly with an impish grin. “Believe me, I know.”
Heavenly touched a hand to her friend’s baby bump and softened with something that felt like envy. “I won’t.”
“Whatever you do, don’t give them your tears unless they’re real.”
Why would someone fake-cry? “I’d never—”
“Good. Another important tip: if they tell you to do something in or out of bed, either sit them down to explain why you can’t—because they will see reason—or do what they’ve told you. Otherwise, be prepared to face the consequences.”
“Like a spanking?” Honestly, she’d enjoyed that…more than she wanted to admit.
“If you’re lucky. But not always.”
“What else would they do? And how am I supposed to know?”
“Sometimes, they’ll tell you the punishment for disobedience in advance. Even if they don’t, after you get to know them, you won’t have to guess too hard.” Raine grinned in a way that made Heavenly nervous. “But I suggest you get good at negotiating, sweetie. You’ll be doing it constantly with those two.”
“Negotiating what?”
Raine smiled as if it should be obvious. “Everything. If you haven’t figured it out yet, there are two things they want most from you. Well, besides sex. Trust and commitment. I know you’re not in a good mental space to be thinking about forever but—”
“I trust them.”
The brunette raised a brow. “They don’t see it that way. I get why you didn’t tell them about Bazookas or your dad and all that stuff. A lot of people want to keep their fam
ily and financial situations private, especially in a new relationship. But now, you’re theirs—at least in their minds. They’re going to expect a lot more from you. And when you hide things, their translation is that you would have told them if you genuinely believed in them.”
That horrified Heavenly. “But that’s not—”
“True? It doesn’t matter. That’s how they’ll take it. You want to hurt them? Keep secrets. Actually, that’s the number one no-no in our house.”
“Does that rule work both ways? Do they keep stuff from you?”
She got quiet. “We all hid our truths and feelings early in the relationship. It nearly destroyed us. So no, none of us keep secrets anymore.”
Heavenly couldn’t imagine blurting out everything. “That’s a lot to grasp.”
“And you’ll have to get used to it. They know that. But try your best. If you’re not willing to, there’s no reason for you to stay.”
Maybe she shouldn’t, but Heavenly needed to see where her heart led her. She couldn’t let guilt make her decisions.
“I will.”
“Good. They won’t settle for just the parts that you want to share.” Raine shoved a tube of mascara in one hand and a lash curler in the other. “Three coats.”
Heavenly nodded and got to work while her friend drifted out to the bedroom and began unloading today’s mall haul from its bags. “Which dress do you think will be good for drinks and dinner tonight?”
“Definitely the pink one.”
Heavenly tried not to blink and get mascara all over her face. “Are you sure?”
“Positive. They’ll love it. You done yet?”
“Almost.”
A few moments later, she stood, swiped at her mistakes with a cotton swab, then dashed to the bedroom to find Raine smoothing out the dress in question and fishing inside a shoebox. “Wear the beige heels with the ankle straps. Ready to get dressed?”
With a nod, Heavenly shimmied out of her plain shorts and T-shirt.
“You’ll need these.” Raine rummaged through another bag and pulled out two filmy pink garments, then thrust them in her hands. “It’s a little something I bought for you to wear under this dress.”
“Thank you. You didn’t have to…” Heavenly said automatically as she glanced down. “They’re see-through.”
