by Shayla Black
“In good fun. I didn’t destroy her ass.”
“At least my bruising is temporary. What do you think your little game of ‘pretend’ did to her psyche?” Beck spat.
“Oh, you’ve got balls to compare the two.”
“Hey, it’s just kink, asshole. But you, forcing her to be your servant for the night, is so bent. Did you even let her have a safe word?”
“Of course,” Seth bellowed. “What the fuck do you think happened? It was some simple role-play. And you’d better get off your high fucking horse because she wanted it. And she loved it.”
The glare Beck shot back said he was totally unmoved. “Well, here’s a news flash for you, Captain America: she wanted and loved my belt, too.”
Impossible. Heavenly wasn’t the sort of sub who’d get off on writhing in agony. “Bullshit. Give me one good reason I shouldn’t just beat the fuck out of you now.”
“Heavenly would hate you for it.”
Seth gnashed his teeth. The surgeon might be a lot of things, but he wasn’t stupid. “Fine. I’ll talk to her first. But goddamn it, Beck! Couldn’t you have fucking waited for me to be here before you unleashed your sadistic shit on her?”
“Why, so you could spot me? And you didn’t exactly wait for me when you crossed the line,” Beck barked back. “And for your information, I’m the one who ended the scene, not her. She would have let me rip her open if I hadn’t.”
Did Beck think that “fact” was going to save him? “By the looks of her welts, you nearly did.”
“Oh, please. Not even close.” Beck sneered. “But at least I didn’t ‘pretend’ to tie her up and force sex on her.”
“What the…” Seth raked a furious hand through his hair. “I didn’t force her to do a damn thing she didn’t want to.”
Beck scoffed. “Well, I hardly took the belt to her ass for the hell of it. I didn’t even do it to sate her curiosity, even though she wanted me to.”
That made the light bulb in Seth’s head flip on. “Wait. Did she tell you she wanted to know about your kink so she could strengthen her bond with you?”
“No, I just whipped off my belt and welted her ass for shits and giggles.” Beck tossed his hands in the air. “Of course.”
“Well, hell…”
As that 411 was sinking in, Beck reached across the island and grabbed Seth’s note to Heavenly, then read it with a frown. “What the fuck is this? ‘Wash a load of towels. Run the dishwasher. Empty the trash cans. Nap before homework. Spend at least thirty minutes doing something you enjoy, and think of us, angel.’ You think she’s your twenty-four-seven slave to command now?”
“I’m giving her structure, dumb ass. She needs it. She’s been anxious without it,” Seth shot back as the coffeemaker gurgled. “I think you and I need to cool our tempers, sit down, and talk. You got time for a cup?”
“I’ll make time.” Beck dragged a couple of mugs from the cabinet.
Sunrise was approaching the horizon when they carried their cups of java outside and each claimed a chair near the infinity-edge pool.
“If what you’re saying is true, that she wanted to taste our kinks, then we can’t punish her,” Beck said.
“I don’t like what I saw, but no.”
“Look, she wanted more than a mere lesson last night. And I was able to knock down her walls and help her purge more of her grief over Abel.”
That took the wind out of Seth’s sails. “She finally broke down and cried?”
“Like a baby,” Beck said. “It was beautiful. And it broke my fucking heart.”
“Damn.” Seth really wished now that he’d been there to witness her breakthrough. “I don’t know how much aftercare you usually give at the club—”
“This isn’t my first rodeo. She was so damn vulnerable. Of course, I drowned her in aftercare.”
“Thank fuck. Hey… I swear, the night we were together, I didn’t do anything she didn’t beg for.”
“I didn’t, either.” Beck fell quiet. “But I didn’t mean to get as rough I did. When I realized she was about to break and that I could tear down some of the walls she’d raised between her and us…I laid into her. Eventually, she couldn’t separate her mental anguish from her physical pain.”
Seth understood…in theory. And on one hand, he was glad Beck had been able to crack their girl open. On the other, those marks proved the lashing had been painful.
“Why don’t you walk me through last night?” Seth suggested. “I’ll do the same when you’re through.”
If they swapped stories, they stood a better chance of staying on the same page where Heavenly was concerned. That would never happen if they didn’t communicate.
Beck drew in a deep breath and laid everything out for Seth. The story was moving…but impossibly hard to stomach.
“She took all that? And didn’t safe word out?”
“Nope.” Beck sighed heavily. “It surprised me, too.”
“Christ.” Seth let out a stunned breath. “Do you think… Is she a pain slut?”
“No. She even told me she didn’t want that kind of play often.”
“Hearing that must have been like someone pissing in your cornflakes.”
Beck flashed him a wry smile. “Ha ha. Actually, it didn’t hurt my feelings at all.”
Whoa. That was a news flash. “Are you seriously thinking about hanging up your whip, sadist?”
Beck shrugged. “Maybe. And weirdly, I don’t think I’ll miss it.”
“I thought that shit was wired into your DNA.”
“I did, too—for a long time. But introducing Heavenly to the lifestyle has been far more interesting and fulfilling.”
“Well, shit. Looks like I’ll have to come up with a new nickname for you. I’ve always called you Dr. Sarcasm-and-Pain.” Seth sent him a sidelong smirk.
“Fuck you,” Beck groused with a grin, then sobered. “Tell me about your night with her.”
Seth drew in a deep breath and explained his Sunday evening with their girl. His cock stirred just thinking about Heavenly in those pretty spiked heels and that sexy see-through “uniform.” He couldn’t wait for her to wear it again.
“I never did any role-play at the club, but after what you described…” Beck sent him a lurid grin. “I’d like to be there the next time she’s in the mood to play servant girl.”
“It would be hot as fuck to tag-team her.”
“For sure, but, um…why the switch in your kink? When did you decide that forced servitude was more your bag than consensual non-con?”
“I never said non-con was my bag. You just assumed it that morning on your condo balcony when you told me about her reactions to the exhibits at the art gallery. I admit I’ve done my fair share of non-con…but straight up? My twisted soul gets off way more on forced servitude. Hell, I used to play it twenty-four seven. Except back then, it wasn’t a game.”
“You lived it?” Beck sat up, looking both shocked and intrigued.
Fuck. He’d said too much.
“For a while,” Seth replied dismissively, then yawned into his empty mug. “Man, I either need to go to bed or get more caffeine.”
“I’ll go grab the pot. I could use more, too. I stayed up too late last night, hoping you’d come home so I could rip you a new asshole.”
“Good luck with that,” Seth tossed back.
Beck laughed. “Yeah, you’re a badass. I got it. Besides, I finally fell asleep.”
Seth grinned as the surgeon sauntered into the house, then returned with the hot carafe and refilled their empty mugs. “So, she charmed us both into sharing our kinks under the guise of being sure she was capable of giving us what we want and need.”
“I think she’s really trying to get a glimpse of what the future with us might look like. Think giving her a taste of our kinks ultimately helped or hurt our cause?”
Seth had his suspicions but… “We need to sit her down and ask. I mean, I always go on gut instinct, and I have no doubt she was all in
with me on Sunday night.”
“Same here. She was crying, begging, dripping, and soaring. My dick was ready to burst out of my jeans before I finally fucked her.”
“Goddamn, we’re idiots.”
Beck raised a dark brow. “Come again?”
“We are. When we decided to hide our inner beasts from Heavenly, all we managed to do was be dishonest, have this unnecessary fight, and deny her the chance to experience more of life with us.”
Beck tossed his head back and groaned. “You’re right; we are idiots. Instead of giving her a chance to prove she’s capable of handling our dark sides, we sub-blocked her.”
Seth nodded and sent the man a crooked grin. “How long have we been in the lifestyle?”
“Too long to be this stupid,” Beck scoffed. “We should both know that neither of us is irresponsible and that we’d never take her too far, especially without her consent.”
“Yeah.” Seth couldn’t disagree. “Believing that would have been easier if we’d known each other longer.”
“And been more familiar with each other’s style of play.”
“That, too.” He winced. “We’re going to have to learn to be as honest and trusting of each other as we want her to be with us.”
“You’re right. No wonder Hammer and Liam fucked this up so bad after Juliet. But we worked our shit out. Look at us go.”
“Amen.” Seth held up his palm and waited until the surgeon high-fived him. “But we still have a problem.”
“Just one?” Beck chuckled.
“Well, it’s the biggest one. Heavenly still hasn’t told us she loves us.” Seth had seen it on her face every time she looked at them, spoke to them, made love to them… But she hadn’t said the words out loud.
“Think she’s reluctant to tell us because it makes the commitment more real for her?”
“That’s my guess.”
“I’m not giving up.” Beck crossed his arms over his chest, clearly getting stubborn.
“Fuck no.”
“So…we’ll have to dig deep, find patience. But I know in my heart she’ll say the words one day, and all this shit we’ve been wading through will have been worth it.”
Seth tried to imagine that day—and couldn’t. He ached to know on a tangible, visceral level that she loved them. “I have to believe it will be.”
“Morning.” Heavenly opened the slider. “What are you two doing out here?”
They both turned to find her stepping onto the patio wearing a silky white robe, hair tousled and looking sleepy-eyed. Seth had never seen a more gorgeous sight.
Scooting his chair back from the table, Beck patted his thigh and opened his arms. Heavenly smiled and carefully crawled onto his lap, snagging his coffee cup and taking a big gulp.
“Just enjoying some coffee while we wait for sunrise.” Seth smiled, hiding all traces of unease.
She nodded and took another long swallow, peering at Beck. “I thought you got up early this morning to do rounds.”
“I did, and I’m late.” He grinned and kissed the tip of her nose. “But I’m glad I got to see you before I left.”
“I’m glad I got to see you, too. But I don’t want to keep you from your patients.” She eased off his lap, then turned to Seth. “How was your night?”
“Productive.” He snagged her around the waist. “Come here, angel.”
When he settled her gently on his thighs, she winced, then peered at him over her shoulder. “Um…”
“I’m just being gentle. I already saw the marks on your ass when I got home.”
She darted a nervous glance Beck’s way. The surgeon simply smiled and winked before draining his coffee cup.
When Heavenly turned to Seth again, he couldn’t resist pressing a tender kiss to the lush bow of her lips.
When they lifted away, shy mischief glinted in her eyes. “Beck and I had a…nice night. It was very, um…pleasant.”
In unison, they all burst out laughing.
Chapter Fourteen
After Beck left for work and Seth dragged himself up to bed, Heavenly took a long, luxurious shower. The water pelting her backside stung in a good way, reminding her of every wicked moment she’d spent with the seductive surgeon. When she dried off and dressed in the giant closet, the sexy shoes Seth had demanded she wear during their evening alone caught her eye. A delicious shiver rolled down her spine.
After a glance at the clock, Heavenly grabbed her purse and lunch, found the keys to Seth’s SUV, and merged with the rush-hour traffic to the hospital.
Her commute crawled at a snail’s pace, but she didn’t let it dampen her sunny mood. She didn’t mind a full day at the ER. It could be harried and urgent, but more and more she pictured herself working there after nursing school. Just like she saw herself staying in LA with Beck and Seth.
Except…in all her fantasies, her father had recovered, so she’d traveled and made memories before starting a career and choosing someone to spend her life with. Settling down had been a few years away, after she’d spread her wings and seen that world Dad had always waxed on about.
On the other hand, besides the grief that still nagged and blindsided her at times, this past week she’d been happier than she ever had been. She loved Beck and Seth more each day. Every moment with them was, in its own way, an adventure. Being able to handle—and enjoy—their kinks had been both freeing and affirming.
But her concerns weren’t about sex. Staying surely meant exactly what Hammer and Gloria had both explained: committing the rest of her life to Beck and Seth and bearing their children.
Was she ready for that?
On the other hand, how could ever she let them go?
If she left after this semester, they would move on—with someone else. The thought made her heartsick. Was chasing her vision of a gypsy future full of exploration more important than a life full of loving them?
Her gut clenched. The answer felt like no. But she only had a finite number of weeks to decide.
As she exited the highway, Heavenly’s cell phone rang. After blindly groping through her purse, she lifted the device and answered. “Hello?”
“Miss Young?” a gruff-sounding man asked.
“Yes.”
“This is Mark Fuller, the general manager with Universal Medical Supply. Do you have a minute? We have an issue.”
Dread filled her stomach. “What kind of issue?”
“We’ve been trying to retrieve the hospital bed from the address you gave us months ago, but the landlord has repeatedly refused to let us inside. He insists on speaking to you first.”
Heavenly’s mouth went dry. “I’m sorry, but I don’t live there anymore.”
“I appreciate that, but our agreement makes you responsible for coordinating the pickup of the bed. So you’ll need to work out things with Mr. Sanchez. Or I’m afraid you’ll owe us for the cost of a new bed.”
“How much is that?” Not that it mattered. She didn’t have the money…
“Three thousand dollars.”
At the hefty price tag, Heavenly’s heart slammed back into her chest. “Um…I left that apartment under difficult circumstances. You see, the landlord and I—”
“Your difficulties aren’t my concern, Ms. Young. You signed the terms and conditions. You need to work with Mr. Sanchez so my guys can get into your former unit. I’ll give you until Monday at five to rectify the situation. After that, I’ll invoice you for a new bed. Have a good weekend.”
The dead air in her ear told Heavenly that he’d hung up.
Numbly, she maneuvered the car into the parking garage. On the other side of the level, she spotted Beck’s convertible in its reserved spot. She should probably go talk to him.
And say what? Please give me three thousand dollars so I can avoid a simple phone call? No. She needed to get brave. She was an adult. Mr. Sanchez hadn’t tried to take anything she hadn’t offered him. Of course he’d been angry when she’d reneged on their agreement. And for demandin
g she uphold her half, Beck and Seth had beaten the snot out of him. It was no surprise he was trying to make her life difficult by refusing to let the rental company retrieve the bed.
Heavenly sighed. She was going to have to call the man, eat some humble pie, apologize profusely, and hope that was enough to assuage him.
As soon as she texted Beck that she’d reached her unit, all hell broke loose. Two car accidents, a gunshot wound, and a case of anaphylactic shock later, it was well past lunch.
Jennifer passed her in the hall and glanced at her watch. “You’ve been here for five hours without a break. Why don’t you take a load off and eat something?”
“Thanks.” Heavenly’s feet thanked the woman, too. “I won’t be long.”
“Take an hour. Things are calming down now, and Kate, the new girl, just clocked in. Oh, Dr. Beckman poked his head in a couple hours ago, but I told him we were swamped. He said to tell you he’d be in surgery this afternoon.”
She blushed. In the last few days, it had become clear that everyone around the hospital knew about her relationship with Beck. And she could see the questions on their faces. They wanted the juicy details. And if they had any idea Seth was in the picture, too, she could only imagine the gossip…
“I appreciate that.”
Heavenly gathered her things from her locker, then headed to the cafeteria. In the middle of the afternoon, most people were done eating. She picked at her sandwich and tried to decide what she’d say to Mr. Sanchez. With the day more than half gone and her timetable short, she’d have to call soon.
The thought ruined what little appetite she had.
Heavenly trashed the rest of her lunch and pulled out her phone. She scrolled through her contacts and found her former landlord’s number. She hadn’t had a chance to remove it yet, which had turned out to be a blessing in disguise.
With shaking fingers, she tapped the screen to complete the call.
He answered before she was braced to hear his voice again. “’Lo?”
“Hi, Mr. Sanchez. I’m not sure you remember me, but I used to live in unit—”
“Cherry pie. How could I forget you?”