‘Bella can barely ride a bike, Luke,’ Juliette said smiling, ‘Have you seen her on her bike? No, you haven’t. Remember what she was like when she was on the top of that ladder when we were painting the sitting room? Talk about cack-handed.’
‘You’re not wrong. I do remember that. Maybe we could suggest it. Could you say anything to Maggie’s ballet teacher? Have a chat with her? Maybe she knows something about it?’ Luke wondered.
Juliette rubbed her chin and thought about it. ‘Could be a possibility I suppose. I’ll talk to Clara - she used to be a professional dancer. I guess she’s seen all sorts of injuries and stuff over the years.’
‘It might give Bella something else to think about too if she could find a ballet class.’
‘I just can’t see her wanting to try that, Luke. Who comes around from surgery where they’re facing the possibility of losing a toe and starts reading a textbook from uni?’
‘Bella does. I reckon it’s actually a really good thing. Gives her something to focus on other than the accident. She’s got her eye on that ball and she’s not taking it off it for anything.’
‘Yeah, I suppose you’re right.’ Juliette nodded in agreement.
‘She seems to be taking it really well, but you never know, do you?’
‘No. Precisely.’
‘Do you think she’ll try the counselling they offered?’
‘I very much doubt it.’
‘What about you? Would you go?’
‘I don’t know. I think it would be good for me to talk about things, but there’s a part of me that almost doesn’t want to. You know? I feel saturated by it all if I’m honest.’
‘Yeah. But I think the last few years have been massive for you. You lost your parents, and now this. People I know who have had counselling mostly seem to praise it.’
‘I’ll think about it a bit more later.’
‘It can’t do any harm, can it?’
‘I guess it depends on the circumstances. Do I want to go over the accident again? No. I do that enough times in my head on my own. But would it help to get someone else’s view? Probably. When you look at it like that.’
‘The option is there if you want it then, isn’t it?’
‘It is.’
‘You’ve had a tough old ride.’
‘Not really. People go through tough times, Luke, you know that from the hospital. I’ve not done too badly Luke. I’ve got you, this lovely house, two beautiful girls. Even my ex-husband is not so bad nowadays.’
Luke nodded his head. ‘We still have to meet my mother. That will be interesting.’
Chapter 29
Juliette strolled slowly through the wildflower garden in the centre of Pretty Beach Gardens and watched Maggie as she skipped along ahead. She’d made spending some time with Maggie a priority after sorting out the orders for A Christmas Sparkle earlier in the day.
Juliette had forced herself to go out, even though she’d wanted to crawl under the duvet and stay there, but she still had to try and be a good mum to Maggie and she was painfully aware that it had recently been all about Bella.
So, she’d taken Maggie to story time at the library, and now they were on a nature walk looking for things to put in jars on Maggie’s windowsill. In Pretty Beach Gardens hundreds of gorgeous heads of pink and white cosmos danced in the wind. Tiny white butterflies flew in and out of the plants and bees buzzed from one flower to the next.
‘Maggie, come over here and look at all these gorgeous petals on the ground. We can put them in your nature jar,’ Juliette called out to Maggie.
Maggie came skipping back and opened her hand out to show Juliette things she’d gathered.
‘Look at these yellow leaves,’ Maggie replied, and Juliette picked through Maggie’s hand where there were leaves, a tiny white stone and a dead beetle.
‘Delightful. What really pretty colours, darling. Good job on finding unusual things. You must have very good eyes to have found all those,’ Juliette replied.
Maggie beamed and continued to walk along looking for other things to put in her jars.
Juliette loved Pretty Beach Gardens. When she’d first had Maggie and the nights were long, and the breastfeeding was in full swing, she would put Maggie in the pram, walk all the way through the laneway, along the promenade, and then end up into the gardens. She’d often get a takeaway cup of tea and a doughnut, Maggie would be asleep in the pram, and Juliette would sit there watching the world go by, gathering her thoughts and getting lost in the flowers.
Here she was again. How her life had changed since those days when she’d sat in the park with a pram and a small baby. Her world was completely different now; divorced from Jeremy, no longer a politician’s wife, but living in her dream house and with a wonderful new partner. She needed to be more grateful for that and more mindful of how far she had come instead of wallowing in the woe is me.
The accident, though, was always on her mind and as she stood in the middle of the wildflower garden watching Maggie sniff the middle of a flower, she was different to how she used to be. Everyone had said that it would get better. That the pain would fade, but she couldn't really see how. She knew, recognised well enough, that other people had things a lot worse. Other people suffered more. Other people lost children, terrible things happened to other people, but in Juliette’s little world she couldn’t seem to accept what had happened to Bella. To Juliette, the whole thing was devastating. She knew that she should be counting her blessings, but somehow, she’d lost sight of being rational in it all.
There was guilt wrapped up amongst all the other feelings too. She knew from her job that some people had a lot more to put up with; Bella was still alive, still overall okay. She should be more appreciative, and she’d tried to be more grateful. Every day she’d mentally gone through the things that she should be and was thankful for. For Maggie and Bella, for the house, for her bike, for her job, for Luke. But mostly none of it made her feel better. She just felt really tired and over it all.
She’d tried to hide how exhausted she was from everyone and primarily she’d done okay on the surface. But it was Luke who had noticed that she’d stopped going out, saying no to invitations, and not going out with her friends. Not seeing anyone and simply existing; going to work where she was doing the bare minimum hours she could and coming straight home and sitting on the sofa.
She’d even tried to avoid doing the school run as much as possible, asking Jeremy if he’d mind, or seeing if it fitted into Luke’s schedule on the way to the hospital. It was like Juliette was exhausted by everything. Bella's accident had seemed to deplete her of her energy, and nothing was making her feel any better.
Juliette sat on a bench near the section of the garden full of forget-me-nots, opened her bag and fished around in the bottom looking for a bottle of bubbles she’d had sitting in the utility room cupboard for ages. She’d just remembered it at the last minute and had popped it into her bag for Maggie. Maggie loved bubbles and Juliette had thought Maggie would love to blow bubbles over the flowers.
‘Ooh, Mummy! Bubbles! I love them!’ Maggie said as Juliette took the top off the bubbles and passed them over to Maggie who took out the wand and started to blow the bubbles out in front of her.
‘Mummy, are you still feeling really sad about Bella’s foot?’ Maggie asked as she dipped the plastic wand in the liquid and continued to blow a long stream of bubbles into the air.
Juliette watched as the bubbles popped onto the flowers and some of them floated way up into the sky overhead.
‘I am sad, yes Maggie, but Bella’s on the mend and I’m starting to feel better now and spending a lovely day with you is cheering me up.’
Maggie smiled and continued, ‘Maddy at school told me that her mum was sad for ages too.’
‘Oh really. What was her mummy sad about? I didn’t hear anything.’
Maggie stood up and clapped her hands over a bubble and it popped, ‘Maddy’s grandpa was in an accident and it ma
de Maddy’s mummy cry.’
‘I didn’t know that. That’s not very nice, her poor grandpa,’ Juliette replied.
‘Yep, Maddy said her mummy was crying all day one day. For like the whole day. And then she said that she got better, so I think that will happen to you.’
Juliette picked up the wand and started to blow bubbles for Maggie, ‘I’m already feeling better just being with you, darling. I think you’d do a very good job of cheering anyone up.’
Chapter 30
It had been a few weeks since Bella had been back in Oxford. In the end, after all the questions and uncertainty the toes had healed sufficiently well, and with each appointment with the consultant she had been happier with Bella’s progress.
However, once Juliette and Jeremy had dropped Bella off in Oxford and made arrangements for Bella to get around, rather than Juliette feeling better, she had found herself absolutely exhausted. It was like the adrenaline, the hospital, and the caring for Bella afterwards had kept Juliette going, kept her getting out of bed, and now that Bella was back in Oxford it seemed to have the opposite effect on Juliette than anyone would have thought. She was depleted of all her energy. All her usual get up and go had ridden off into the sunset.
Juliette lay on her back in her bed staring up at the ceiling not blinking. She’d been lying there for ages, things flitting in and out of her thoughts. She didn’t even know how long it had been. She’d been lying there thinking about getting up, but not actually getting up. She was that tired.
She turned on her side and looked over at the bright sunshine streaming through the gaps in the shutters. A thought floated through her mind that she should be throwing open the shutters and looking out over the sea in the distance and embracing a new day. She should be making the most of the summer days outside in the garden at the very least, rather than being cooped up indoors with no energy.
She lifted the duvet off, walked over to the bathroom, went to the loo, and looked in the mirror. A grey, tired image looked back at her. She picked up Luke’s dressing gown which she’d dropped on the floor the night before and put it on as she walked down the stairs.
At least the house was quiet, at least she didn’t have to talk to anyone. She could laze around for as long as she wanted. Try to recharge her batteries.
She flicked the switch on the kettle and waiting for it to boil opened the door of her blue Smeg fridge and poked around looking for carbs. At least she had carbs. Carbs give you energy, she thought with a smile, and flicked through a few of her pink plastic containers in the fridge and found nothing even remotely appealing.
In the huge black dressing gown, she sauntered over to the bread bin and looked inside. A whole bag of vanilla buns sat there tightly sealed in a bag. The sight of them made her laugh to herself. A whole delivery of eight Locals Only vanilla buns. Pretty Beach had done its work and come up trumps. She smiled to herself and thought that she could probably sell the buns on eBay.
She took two buns out of the bag, didn’t bother doing it back up, left the bag out on the worktop, and started to stuff one in as she stood at the window of the kitchen looking out at the garden.
Her phone buzzed in the pocket of Luke’s dressing gown and she knew from the ringtone that it wasn’t Bella. She took it out to have a look just in case it was Jeremy with something about Maggie.
Her friend Leza, Dr Leza.
Heard you’re feeling shattered from it all. Not going to offer any advice. Come round in your pyjamas if you want. I’ve seen you looking your worst, remember? Share a wine like the old days. **** the wine let’s make that vodka. You need a recharge.
Stuffing another piece of vanilla bun in her mouth, Juliette smiled. Leza always made her laugh and she wasn’t one to fluff around with niceties. Juliette read the text again, didn’t send a message in reply, and slipped her phone back into the pocket of Luke’s dressing gown. There was no way she was going around to Leza’s, pyjamas or not. She just needed a few days of doing nothing and then she’d get her energy back.
Chapter 31
A few weeks or so later, Juliette finished tucking the edges of the quilt into Maggie’s white iron vintage-style bed and looked around the room. Not a bad place to grow up - a beautiful bedroom with stripped timber floors, an exquisite old fireplace now a very pale pink, and huge floor to ceiling shutters looking out over a back garden brimming with pretty flowers.
Maggie was sitting on her pink gingham chair by the window with her dolly Delilah and watching a movie on her tablet.
‘I’m just going to vacuum in here, darling. Can you just pop the teddies on the bed please and put your jacket in the wardrobe? After I’ve done a few jobs we’ll walk down to the bakery and get some treats, shall we?’
‘Yes please, Mummy. Hopefully, they’ll have some cinnamon buns left.’ Maggie replied as she got up and put the teddies onto her bed.
Juliette adjusted the little butterfly lights that weaved in and out of the head of Maggie’s bed, picked up one of Maggie’s school blouses and a pair of Maggie’s white ankle socks that had made their way under the bed, and put them in the washing basket at the door.
She opened the big old sash windows to let in some fresh air, turned on the Hoover, and started to push it back and forth over the room, the rhythmic movement calming her mind.
Juliette had been undecided all the way through Bella’s surgeries and recuperation as to what she was going to do with A Christmas Sparkle and Lellery. They’d been brilliant and had pretty much offered Juliette whatever she liked, and had said that they would wait to hear from her.
In the end, Victoria from Lellery had come up with an interim plan which involved Juliette’s vintage Christmas collection as part of a small concession of up and coming brands coming to the store for the festive season.
As the time had come for Juliette to be involved with Lellery, Bella was doing well and the only thing that was really holding Juliette back was her energy levels. Something about Bella’s accident had definitely affected her get up and go.
She’d survived being a single mum, a horrid divorce, the death of both her parents all quite well, but Bella’s accident had knocked her for six.
What was she going to do, though? Laze around and put her life on hold for months?
As she pushed the vacuum back and forth she knew what Bella would say if she even knew that Juliette was contemplating not doing the Lellery Christmas work. She would be mortified.
Juliette walked over to the socket, pulled out the plug and just as the lead was going back into the Hoover and she was closing the window she saw her friend Lottie walking down the cobbled lane at the back.
Wondering why Lottie was going the back way, she watched as Lottie stopped at a rose, put her nose in and sniffed. Then she took a pew on one of the benches a few doors down, picked a piece of what Juliette knew was lavender from a huge plant and inhaled that too.
Juliette stood there watching Lottie. Lottie would kill for an opportunity like Juliette had with Lellery. She knew what Lottie would say, she would tell her to suck it up and get on with it just like Lottie had had to do when her husband had died, leaving her alone with three young boys, no money, no real skills, and no serious support.
Lottie had picked herself up, found herself what she called the crappiest job in Newport Reef, and took the whole thing on the chin. Now Lottie had her own little business and it was thriving - all because she’d got on with it.
Here was Juliette, with her lovely new house, two girls and Luke, playing a violin for herself because she had no energy and was too tired for the opportunity to style for one of the most prestigious brands in the world because her daughter had had an accident.
Juliette picked up the mop bucket, poured a couple of capfuls of Dettol into the water and started to vigorously mop Maggie’s bedroom floor.
She thought about Lottie and how she’d handled her own trauma and made a decision. She would suck it up and get herself on to Lellery in the morning.
Chapter 32
‘Hi, Victoria. It’s Juliette Sparkles here.’
‘Hello, Juliette. How are you? I was only thinking of you a few days ago! Hope everything is okay? How is your daughter now?’
‘Thank you. I’m glad to say that she’s definitely on the mend.’
‘That’s so good to hear. It all sounded really horrible. Terrible, in fact.’
‘Yes, it was. I don’t want to go through that again, but she’s doing a lot better than the surgeon expected, so we’re all very happy with that.’
‘That’s really good news. I was going to get in touch actually this week. I had something to speak to you about.’
Juliette sighed. She thought this was going to happen. She had taken her finger off the pulse with A Christmas Sparkle and the Lellery opportunity. These people didn’t mess around. They wanted commitment and dedication, not a one-woman company with no staff. They’d obviously had a change of mind and her stock had not sold well.
‘The sales have been really healthy for your concession. So, we’d like to offer you to do an exclusive range with us,’ Victoria said and Juliette could almost feel her smiling down the phone. Juliette nearly dropped the phone.
‘Oh wow! I wasn’t expecting that! I thought you were going to say the opposite. Thank you so much.’
‘You’re welcome. What were you expecting, then?’
‘I guess with the accident having taken over my life, and me not being able to commit much, well, I thought you would be backing out of it.’
‘On the contrary. As you know, we love small, exclusive brands. Plus, from my point of view, I am always quietly cheering on the sidelines for mums in small business. Yes, so as I said, we’d love to move on further. That’s if you are agreeable, obviously.’
A Pretty Beach Wish Page 10
